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Reviews for A Valentine\'s Day to Remember

By : PyroAngelEz
  • From ANON - Goddess of song on March 28, 2009
    this is such a sweet story, i really like this pair
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  • From ANON - mina on February 17, 2007
    lovely lovely story from beginning straight to the end :)
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  • From ANON - Amethyst-eyed Koneko on February 12, 2007
    a very sweet ending! :) I was surprised tho that Roy just shoved himself completely into Ed like that knowing that it was Ed's first time. yikes! He should have slowed down a bit. He coulda really hurt Ed doing that! ;) Another thing that really stood out to me was all the attention to detail. Take the dinner scene for example. Roy didn't just fix spaghetti with salad and garlic toast. He "took out two pots and a pan. Noodles were put into one pot while the other was used to make up the spaghetti sauce. Garlic bread was placed on the pan and stuck into the oven, the timer being set. Salad was washed and left in a strainer to drain." :) The only thing you didn't say was how he prepared the spaghetti sauce! :D Another example - the cleaning oil for the pocket watches. One, I didn't even know cleaning oil even existed and two, did we really need to know that "the natural oil that held no chemicals or [harsh] additives that would damage the alchemic amplifier."? That was a bit of a mood killer. Roy couldn't have grabbed something else? Some other oil (cooking/olive oil from the kitchen) or lotion or actual lube? He wasn't as prepared as he thought he was now was he? :) Finally, there was the after sex scene. Roy must have OCD if he had the presence of mind to clean up the balcony, put all the dirty clothes in the hamper, make sure the cleaning oil was put back in its drawer, close and lock the door, AND adjust the thermostat after just having had awesome sex! wow! This man's got major stamina! Ah, if only all men were this conscientious what a wonderful world it would be! LOL Please don't think I'm complaining. I'm really not. Just giving my honest impressions of your story. Oh, btw, the memorial scene was really beautiful. Also, since you mentioned Ed's metal hand several times throughout this, don't forget to go change that one line in chapter one where you said Ed got his arm back before the stone broke. It's a small thing but it really should be dealt with.
    Thanks for a great read!
    Koneko =^.^=
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  • From ANON - Amethyst-eyed Koneko on February 12, 2007
    I just started reading this and I thought I should point out a little mistake. In the beginning of chapter one you said that Ed still had an automail arm - "Edward brought his right knee up to his chest, his automail arm wrapped around his leg." - but at the end of the chapter Ed has a normal flesh arm - "After they had found the philosopher's stone, they were able to restore Al's body and his arm before the stone shattered." Ya might wanna fix this. Other than this, this is a really great story and I'm off to read more! :D
    Koneko =^.^=
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  • From eeriansadowthefallen on February 08, 2007
    woohoo! sex on a rooftop!

    eh-hem. sorry; now that i've gotten that out of my system, i'll leave the real review.

    i loved that there was some acutal devolopment before the gratitous smut scene. and the way you had them interacting was so sweet, but still in character.

    great work, girls. (aside from that huge omission i noticed at the begining of chapter 1. *wink*)

    eerian
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  • From eeriansadowthefallen on February 07, 2007
    Edward Elric pulled his keys from his pocket and removed his key. The door to the apartment he had shared with Roy Mustang, and tossed his cloak on a nearby chair. It seemed that the General wasn't home yet, all the better, he just needed to be alone right now.

    okay, girls, i know what the paragraph is supposed to say. but you're really missing a rather crucial piece of information here. like opening the door. you might want to edit that.

    eerian

    ps: i'll leave a real review when i finish reading the fic.
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  • From ANON - Anon on September 26, 2006
    This is so sweet! I really love it! But...are you sure its finished? I mean, its a great ending. but what about after, maybe you could write a story called after valentines day or something. how is everyone going to react, what about alphonse? I dont know. I mean, its a great ending and it certainly doesnt need anymore but im being selfish and i want to read more. lol. but this was great, so sweet. i cried when they were at their mothers grave. it made me so sad to see their pain, poor al and ed! 10/10, it was great. I loved it.
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  • From ANON - Ladynight on May 27, 2006
    This was a good story. I hope to read more from you two in the future.
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  • From ANON - Ri on May 27, 2006
    Okay that was hot! Loved the last chapter! =3 Great job please write more stories like this one. ^^
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  • From ANON - Arra on March 14, 2006
    Wow. Nicely done. It's a month since there were any updates or new stories, because of the change of tracker, and I have been waiting patiently. I must say this was a very nice start to get into my reading rutine again. Hehe. Anyhow. It's a sweet and well written story, and I am looking forward to read the last chapter. Good luck, and keep on writing.
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