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Reviews for Perfection

By : Camaro
  • From ANON - Rourinu on January 27, 2008
    ....that better not be the end of the story. I will murder you in the worst possible way if it is!

    I was getting worried that you weren't going to update this magnificant piece of work again, so I'm thrilled to see a new chapter! I feel so sorry for poor Goku though. He's forced to watch all this and unable to do a thing about it. I hope Vegeta catches on soon; I know he's smarter than that. Kakarot is just too different to pull off being Goku.
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  • From Robyn on January 27, 2008
    *SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE* It's back and BETTER than I ever imagined. Poor Goku! Having to sit through it all, but I liked how he was able to see what Kakarott wasn't getting. Knowing Vegeta would have advantages, I suppose.

    Now, after all the 'end of the story' I have to guess it isn't like Goku is dreading it is going to.

    We shall see. :D Hopefully soon!
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  • From Zofo on January 25, 2008
    Brillient story, so dark and sad with many twists and turns. Such an original idea as well. I've loved every moment of it.

    Is that the end? I was hoping for a reprieve for Goku. Surely there must be a way out for him.
    xxx
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  • From MutantPoptart on January 25, 2008
    Oh, wow. Your story has really gotten me hooked. I started reading earlier today and haven't stopped since.
    This is truly dark and twisted. Your writing along with your innovative ideas invoke so many emotions from the reader. The whole Bulma thing is really ...disturbing and the imagery around the gory parts is very...gross. I commend your twistedness and wonder how you sleep at night.
    I'll understand if you take your time on the update-- you obviously put a lot of thought into this story and as a reader, I appreciate your dedication.
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  • From ANON - topbear on January 17, 2008
    this story is very twisted. I love it. please write more.
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  • From salomonbob on November 07, 2007
    typically i don't particularly care for the stories on adultfanfiction but this one was an exception. or is. i just really want to find out what happens next. which also reminds me.

    you suck.

    i was totally SO CLOSE to being late to work this morning because your story had me up ALL NIGHT reading it and then it distracted me while i was supposed to be getting ready too. my eyes were hurting so bad on the way to work early this morning. i was like camaro i really hate you. but it all worked out in the end and it's not like i'd prefer to have not read the story, GOD no. i wish that i was reading it now, but NO it has to not be finished. write me more story?
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  • From Robyn on October 20, 2007
    O.o OMG...YAY for the story being back! (Vegeta's just a cliff hanger.) :P


    Uh...I certainly wouldn't have survived the things Goku has had to go through (actually, I am surprised he's still alive...obviously, Kakarott has a plan...I can't imagine it's for any other reason). I can't imagine what's going to happen next, but I am looking forward to the next chapter!
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  • From ANON - CrimsonTide on October 20, 2007
    Ahh!! Such a teasingly short chapter after such a long wait! *pouts* Quite the cliffhanger there. I feel so bad for poor Goku :( Despite the cruel chapter ending, you did a wonderful job, as usual. I hope to read more very soon!
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  • From smhatche on September 13, 2007
    OMFG... What is there to say? The story is not even finished, yet I can say with confidence that it is one of the best stories I have ever read. It's a DBZ fanfic for christ sakes! It's not like the silly little love stories you read on AFF all the time. It actually has a point that any avid reader who knows anything about books would enjoy. The themes are so far beyond simple animes and cartoons that I wonder why you chose to write this in the form of a fanfic. The ideas are something that are repulsive to think of, but absolutely true nonetheless. I just can't get over how deep the story is. You are an amazing author and should not limit yourself to the confines of AFF. You truely have what it takes to be a great author. I can't wait to see how finnish the story, so keep up the good work!
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  • From ROGUEFURY on March 01, 2007
    Well, I would normally comment on the actual content of your work, but since you went out of the way to bash me for something as simple as a misunderstanding, I'll skip the niceties and tell you to grow up and mind your own business.
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  • From ANON - Misty on March 01, 2007
    Just when i thought it was going to be all lovey dovey you make the story so much better. I love it
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  • From Robyn on February 28, 2007
    This was an absolutely amazing chapter. Their lives have deviated so much from each others, they needed to know how much alike they still were.

    In some ways, knowing the other so well is good, but there are complications to it, I am certain.
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  • From ANON - Kat on February 28, 2007
    Yes! Chapter 11 is here at last!!! *Throwing a mini-party*

    “What beautiful world awaited someone at the very peak of drug induced intoxication?”

    Good question!! I have honestly always been curious about the reactions people have to hallucinogenic drugs. Not enough to try them, of course…

    “Christ, I think I felt like the most selfish person in those moments.”

    Not the most selfish person. I don’t think he’s anymore selfish than most people. He’s just not perfect.

    “She loved you, you know," I told his back, looking downwards. "We've always known that."

    You know, I’ve always thought that. It just seems a little obvious to me sometimes.

    “The same with Piccolo and all the others that tried to stop me.”

    O_O!!! Not Piccolo!!!! Damn, I like him. *Pouts* So, Bulma IS dead?? *Confused*

    “How can you destroy a man that cares for nothing?”

    Ah, but no one cares for nothing. He cares for his vision, doesn’t he?

    “Me? I'd fight to the death and love every minute of it."

    Hmmm… he really does remind me of Vegeta.

    “It also brought to light a very acute understanding that I really felt no shame in being so abrasively turned-on by him. We'd always been obsessed with mirrors and reflections; it would make perfect sense that I constantly caught myself admiring him.”

    LOL!! Absolutely love this!! At least he’s honest with himself.

    “And then my eyes bolted open as I was ball sack-kicked with the realization that this was so comforting because it was what I had done with Vegeta so often.”

    Poor Goku, he has no idea what a rebound is, does he? Is it a rebound? It seems that way sometimes, but it also seems to be deeper too.

    “Yes, every single inch of my body (yes yes, giggle, every inch, snort snort) was screaming that I wanted this.”

    OMG, that was sooo funny. I started choking…

    "So tell me," He breathed, tracing my face with his fingertips. "beautiful stranger. How long do you intend to keep your secrets from yourself?"


    Ooooo… I was wondering when that was going to come up!! I mean, he has to be in that cell for a reason, right? BTW, HOT!!!!!!!! *fanning frantically*

    Thanks for the lovely chapter Camaro!!!! These are always worth the wait :)
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  • From Robyn on February 24, 2007
    Really slacking in my review time...

    So, Goku and Kakarott are now face to face...and a bit more. Wonder how far this will go before Goku comes back to his senses...or even if he will...
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  • From ANON - Kat on February 16, 2007
    Ah, thank-you for updating!! I was so bored, and then I saw that Perfection was updated!!

    “It just felt wrong, just unnatural. Like two magnets with opposite energy being placed near one another and fighting against it.”

    I love how you use magnets here to describe them :) It not only shows how different they are, but how they are ‘attracted’ in a way, and how they feed off of each other. This should make for some interesting interactions in the future :p

    “Everything about him screamed sex and I had to oddly wonder if my body did the same thing.”

    LOL… I can just see this scene in my mind. Kakarot pushing Goku against a wall, and of all the things that Goku SHOULD be thinking about, he’s idly wondering if he ‘screamed sex’ to other people like his exact double does.

    “I didn't understand this sudden obsession and I sure as shit wasn't about to indulge in stupidity quite like I had with Vegeta. No, he'd definitely cured me of that little flaw.”

    PHEW!! For a second there, I thought we were going to see them both jump at each other and start humping with Krillin and Yamcha having asphyxiation problems. Not that this wouldn’t have been nice, but maybe later :)

    "So tell me," He breathed again, his powerful chest smashed against mine as he explored every feature of my face with his eyes. "beautiful stranger. Why exactly do you look just like me?"

    Ah, good!! I was hoping Kakarot had figured that out! One question down!

    BTW, I love Goku’s inner sarcasm here!!

    "Hmmm...." He sighed again, forehead against mine as he closed his eyes. "You... taste like me." "Good God," Yamcha was whispering, horrified at this explicit scene.

    LMAO!!!! Seriously, this was a ‘throw my head back and cackle out loud moment’, followed my giggling that hasn’t completely stopped just yet. Guess I spoke a little early before huh??

    "Well what can I say," I smarted back, lifting my eyebrows. "I try." "And don't I love you already for it," He laughed."

    Oh good grief. Goku’s flirting with him and Kakarot’s flirting right back!!

    “I widened my eyes at that, about to retort something snotty when blood shot into my eyes and pain nearly knocked me out. He'd pointed two fingers at me, exploding both my knee caps with his energy.”

    And did I mention already that I love these moments where you make my mouth just fall open?? If not, then I do!!

    Oh, and OUCH!!!

    "Ah ah ah," Kakarot grinned, eyes dark as the bullet spun around and launched itself into Yamcha's throat."

    Again with the mouth falling open… or, it would have, except it was still open from earlier.

    “I struggled weakly against them, my knees so kindly reminding me of their position when I yanked upwards, nearly passing out again from it.”

    So, is Goku in a regeneration tank and slowly being healed, or is he just being held in water?

    "You WILL work and you WILL give me what I want." I heard him say, listening closely. "Or so help me, I'll keep her forever. You think you know the pain she suffers? You cannot even BEGIN to imagine what eternity will inflict."

    Is Kakarot talking to Bulma’s father about Bulma? Is she still alive? Or is he talking about Bulma’s mother? Heck, is he even talking to Bulma’s father?? SO MANY QUESTIONS!!!!

    “And even sadder thought took me: He could love you the way that Vegeta never did.”

    This line made tears come into my eyes, and I’m not exactly sure why. I just don’t want to have Goku get hurt like that again.

    “He seemed to sigh, rolling his eyes as he straddled me suddenly.”

    Eeep!! Personal space!!! Poor Goku, or lucky Goku really, depending on how one would view the situation.

    “What an odd feeling, I almost laughed, to be so turned on by oneself. Certainly Narcissus would be jerking off in his grave at that one.”

    LOL! Yes, I imagine he would be. *shakes head ruefully*

    “We were both drunk on the moment, our auras and powers contrasting and combining until we were intoxicated with sexuality.”

    Drunk, or high. *fanning frantically* Is it hot in here, or is it just them?

    BTW, “Inside of You” by Hoobastank is playing in the background. I recommend listening to this song when reading this part. It’s making me grin hopelessly :)

    Oh God, now “Vanilla” by Gackt came on. There’s no hope for me now…

    “Oh, but wouldn't that just be hilarious. Vegeta waking up from his comma, bashing my head against whatever buildings/boulders/God knows whats, until I remained just a trembling half-wit in an insane asylum.”

    And there’s some more of that sarcasm that I love in your Goku!!

    “I wouldn't let him see how horribly the pain in my knees still was, despite the healing abilities of the pool.”

    Ah, so it IS a regeneration tank!! I was wondering…

    "And prey tell," He leaned back further, an amused grin on his face. "how precisely should I be?"

    Hmmm… now that’s an interesting question. I mean, is anybody the way that they SHOULD be?? How do we know if someone should be the way they are or not? Maybe Goku’s supposed to be more like Kakarot. Food for thought here!

    “We loved them but we wouldn't fall to pieces without them."
    "Alright then," I nodded finally. "So I don't understand. I don't grasp the full sense of it. If that didn't make you what you are, if that didn't put a contradiction between us, what did?"

    *Raises eyebrows* EXCELLENT question Goku!! Was wondering that myself actually.

    “Triphilim City, I thought for a second, trying not to miss his words. Why did that sound so familiar?”

    Exactly, why DOES that sound so familiar?? I KNOW it’s familiar.

    “We don't control fate and we haven't the right to save every single stupid soul in this world because it suits our situation and our self perception.”

    Then, why is Kakarot trying to control fate??

    Okay, ewwww!!! Oh, that was disgusting!!! That poor, poor girl!!! I KNOW shit like this happens all the time, but it’s still horrible!!

    But on a side note, I do love how you use vivid and disturbing images to get your point firmly across.

    “Their legal justice system was an absolute joke, money buying freedom for monsters and condemning the innocent for charges incomparable to those that the rich were freed from.”

    *Sigh* How true, sadly. Have you ever seen “Murder in the First”? It’s an excellent movie starring Kevin Bacon (I think this is his greatest role actually) that’s all about the unfairness of the judicial system.

    “My eyes opened widely and I turned away. Triphilim City. It had been the first place destroyed by Nappa in the wake of his and Vegeta's arrival. I felt nauseous suddenly.”

    OMFG!!! O_O!!! My mouth was open, but that didn’t matter, because I actually put my hands over my mouth in horror!! All of what happened!! All of it could have been stopped by Nappa blowing up a town??!!!!???!!!! O_O!!!!!!!!!!!

    "Logic." I spat arrogantly, standing upright and gazing at him. I was tired of his scrutiny, his ability to undermine even the most basic morals seemingly to justify his sadistic need for devastation. "Tell me than, Kakarot. When your logic fails you, which it inevitably does for us all, when justification falls short of expectation, what happens?"

    Yes, exactly!!! Logic only gets you so far when it’s not really true. And again with Kakarot trying to determine fate for everyone!!

    "Or is it," I smoothed my finger over the jagged marks that tore up his arms. "that you already know the touch of a conscience you've so obviously tried to silence?"

    Another excellent question, and I think Goku is right on the mark there.

    Whew!!! Wow, that chapter was a long one (which I was ecstatic about!)!! There was just so much in here. You really put my emotions through the ringer here, not that I didn’t love every second of it :) I don’t know if that makes me a masochist or not… *shrugs* This was great Camaro, can’t wait for more (and for another chapter of Monster 2)!!!!!!!
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