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Reviews for Barracks

By : chayron

From TristaML on July 09, 2019
Yay! So so happy to have read these last two chapters. They were great! Progress! I was not expecting Trunks' appearance when he came but, man, I loved it! There's so much detail in each of the chapters, which is good- I like a long read- and I found these last two very amusing. I'm excited for the next updates on this.

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From TristaML on May 16, 2019
This right here, this is crazy! I was shocked to see an update on this story! I had to reread the last 5 chapter to really remember what was going on! I can't believe it!
I have a feeling you have an ending in mind for this and I really hope that you do, and I hope that you DO complete it, even if it's only for your sanity's sake...
That last chapter though, finally, FINALLY some things are starting to come together. This world is so big in comparison to most other stories, and so it can seem to play out more like a reality show rather than a connect-the-dots story line, but I am still interested in finishing it.
By the way, the formatting on this website has changed, just put words italicized or bold or underlined like normal, no need to use "<i> </i>" anymore.
Oh, and love that you made the eldest Vegeta the bad guy! I didn't see that coming, and that Kakarot came in out of nowhere... Looking forward to more.
TristaML

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From ANON - Anon on April 07, 2019
hey can I be in this story

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From ANON - Anon on April 07, 2019
hey can I be in this story

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From ANON - Anon on April 07, 2019
hey can I be in this story

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From Nelfie14 on January 20, 2019
Where are you?!!! I miss the updates 😭😭😭

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From Strids on December 30, 2017
At first, I was looking for a fast and hot story. Yes such a reader you whern’t waiting for. 😉 but after two chapters you had me. I was glued to my iPad for the last 2 weeks. Yes with ordinary life and the fact that English is not my native language (so my excuse if my writing is not quite right), it took me two weeks to read it al. I find it Amazing that you’v put that much effort en years in the story. I hink it's a nice story and it had me in its grip for the last 2 weeks. Though I am very curious about the rest of the story. If that comes at all. If not then that's too bad, but these 65 chapters I enjoyed a lot. Now i’m going to read one of your other story’s.

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From ANON - kitkat on February 17, 2016
Meh. I stopped reading this years ago. Things went off the rail and then you insulted your readers who tried to give constructive criticism. Will be glad when you finish so it stops showing up in the updates page. Bye!
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From TristaML on January 18, 2016
I'm still dying to know what's going to happen. I'm inclined to think that Goten isn't going to die, of course, but the roles that Vegeta and Kakarot play are intriguing me more than anything else at the moment. That, and the fact that a simple solution to the story seems impossible, since there's so much going on, what with their world ending as well as Goten and Ryen's relationship. I will say this website seems abandoned as of late, even I find myself forgetting to check it, but when I do I am happy to see the updates. Looking forward to whatever finale you have planned out for this story.
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From ANON - Sophie on January 10, 2016
oh. my. god.

The action levels are amping up!! This chapter was awesome. Lot's of narrative webbing and setting up and I am so excited for more!

I am thoroughly looking forward to the next chapter and the ensuing conversation, and am curious as to weather Reyn will eavesdrop or if Prince Vegeta will bail him up outside the door for something and can't wait to be able to read the whole fic start to finish!

Always appreciating the work you put in and every chatper Chayron!
Thanks, Sophie :D
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From ANON - nancy103 on January 08, 2016
The latest chapter raises more questions! Love it! And yes, Vegeta knows a lot and is only telling a little. But why would he want Goten to leave immediately? Was it to protect him? It had to be, yes? And then I like how relaxed Goten is when he fights now. He is very confident and it is nice to see.
But this war is going to bring high casualties, even if they win. I don't think the Saiyan empire will ever be the same.
Thanks for updating and good work!
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From ANON - Guest on November 16, 2015
I would agree with you that Trunks as a character doesn't seem real. His reappearance is abrupt and to be honest it doesn't make much sense to me.

I think back to the beginning of this story that I read over and over again because it was so beautifully written. All your characters were so three-dimensional, including Trunks. I would read and reread his interactions with Goten because I found them so fascinating. Then you would add in little extras that would add another layer to his character, such as him letting the shyuu off with stealing the cigars, his relationship with his guard and the portrait of him as an insecure child, and his frustration with his inability to comfort Goten after Toharu's death, etc. I remember these interactions because they all revealed something new. You were a master of characterization.

However, then Trunks was slowly stripped from the story. He was mentioned less and less, often in passing every five or so chapters. With this, he was stripped of his personality. His reappearance now makes no sense to me and leaves me a little unsettled as a reader. Who even is this guy? What has he been doing this whole time? From the scenes he HAS been in, it seems like he's just been sitting around obsessing about Goten. His relentless obsession seems to be his only remaining character trait, and even that doesn't even make sense to me. It further portrays Goten as a Mary Sue because WHY is Trunks still attracted to him? Just because he's Goten and everyone loves him? It's been forever since they've even interacted (years, for the readers of your story). Even now that Trunks has returned, in all of his interactions with Goten he's either annoyed or just being pervy. There doesn't seem to be a basis for his crush on Goten anymore. It's just...there because it used to be. From my view as a reader, Trunks isn't a fully fleshed out person anymore. He's just a two-dimensional plot device...and he seems to be moving the plot no where.

I do not say this to insult your work, but rather, to give my feedback as a reader. As a reader, it seems like Trunks was completely removed from the story and now he's trying to be worked back in but with no apparent growth or any changes to his character, despite the fact that we're 30-40 chapters further in the plot. He stayed stagnant while everything else developed, and now readers are supposed to believe him and Goten's little infatuation is just picking up where it left off? It just doesn't seem believable. From a reader perspective, Trunks, as a character, doesn't seem believable.

I hope the coming chapters will help shed some light on who Trunks is, what he's been doing, what his motivations are, etc., otherwise I am going to continue to have a hard time buying his relationship with Goten. It's your story and you can write it in any way you choose, but please consider some of this feedback because it may not be the same experience you have as a writer. You clearly have more insight into your characters than your readers do - so the relationships they have may make more sense to you. But I can say that as a reader, I don't buy a Trunks/Goten relationship without further development. It just seems unrealistic to me.
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From ANON - Pisces on September 28, 2015

Whelp, it says a lot more about the author who wants reviews but can�t handle criticism without blowing a gasket.

It�s one thing to have outright, abusive flamers who hate on your homo eroticism, and completely another when someone is trying to point out continuous flaws and how to improve upon your work. Honestly, no one has to take the time out to even review or continue with 60 chapters of repetitiveness. But I suppose �This is the best fan fiction I�ve ever read!� and �Keep updating!� strokes a weak ego to begin with.

Yeah, best not to call your fans with honest-to-goodness opinions �naive assholes�. Opinions are out there, honey, and it's the spice of life to find someone who will share theirs with you, especially when it's about your own work. It's kind of what the working world is like, so if you're going to actually work in the creative field I sure hope you'll handle them better than you do online.

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From TristaML on August 17, 2015
To be honest I kind of agree that Reyn and Goten's relationship seems to have lasted much longer than one would expect, but that only makes me want Trunks and Goten together even more, and it makes the transition more interesting and more powerful. I also think it's weird that Trunks doesn't seem to really care what happens to the Saiyan empire. He's says they'll be lucky to last another month like it's raining outside. He's seems much more interested in getting Goten than anything. What's going to happen to the Saiyans, they are in a lot of trouble. I wonder what Kakarot is doing this whole time, surely he knows more than his silence leads us to believe... Goten's impending death is a little nerve-wracking, too, but he's handling it well. I suppose the idea of seeing the future hasn't really had as much of an impact on me in this story until now. I guess I'll have to wait until the next chapters. Thanks for updating!
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From monsterpippi on August 16, 2015
This is the first of your stories i am reading, i really like the alternate universe idea. I think Trunks is spot on, while i find it unlikely for Goten to have such a stable/long relationship with Rayn, it should have ended long ago, they might have stayed friends due to their connection of the experiments and reyn may have stayed a rival to trunks anyhow but it just seems unlikely that they would be still together. goten just couldn't be that egoistic, knowing that he isn't in the relationship a 100%. I really need to know how it ends though, i read everything in under a week so the humor is definitely to my liking. oh after toharus death i stopped reading for a day or two, i had to mourn him, he was a favorite of mine.

keep up the good work and good luck on untangeling the whole rayn/goten/trunks triangle. i am very curious as to what we will get to know about the gohan-imposer from gotens dream and how goten will get out of the whole thing with him seeing his own death and all, also what will happen with the war and if we will see a super sayan sooner or later.
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