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Reviews for Much Like Suffocating

By : CardDragonBall

From ANON - jaygoose on June 01, 2004
How the hell did I get two chapter behind. oh well, anyway. I loved the way you killed Bardock it was so deserved too bad there is only so much you can do to a body while its still alive. *sigh* I feel so bad for Krillin...I damn near cried. *pouts* But the Goten and Trunks sex brought me right out of it. *lecherous grin*
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From ANON - Ginia on June 01, 2004
Well, you never said "The End"... but it sure felt like a beautiful ending. *sigh* Maybe Goten can ease Krillin's poor mind? Even if there isn't a epilogue, I would like to believe it happened.

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From ANON - macha on June 01, 2004
ah, the carnage was lovely. I hope that you have a few more chapters for this story up your sleeve.
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From ANON - Mechanical Butterfly on May 31, 2004
, fingers that felt like metal brands and tightened with every passing second, prolonging the loss of oxygen just to prove that he could.--o_O my poor por Vegeta...

Even with his ears bleeding from the loss of the Juro slaves, he was impervious.--psycho bastards are usually unstoppable. Gosh he is upsetting me!

The hands tightened, just a fraction, and the smile on that bastard�s face got a little broader as he realized he held the heir to the Saiyan throne in his hand, and the other ones�--Ugh! that bastard thinks he has the upper hand! He thinks he is so great I know he does!!! *sobs* I want him to die so badly!

�That�s were you belong, on your knees�.whore.� --*screams*!!!! Oh god...I cannot wait for Bardock to die...I will throw a party and everything! I him him so. I hate when he calls Vegeta a whore! It makes me want to AHHHH! *takes large heavy pipe and bashes Bardock's head in* Ah...feel a little better now.

�Do me one last favor, whore,� Bardock whispered, �Scream when I kill you.�--he is a cruel man...and a sick twisted one too. To get pleasure from Vegeta's screaming in pain!!! NEVER, I don't want him to ever have that pleasure.

saw a vision of rape wou would have devastated everything beyond what it was now--if Bardock raped Vegeta...I would..ugh that was just be soooo horrible and unthinkable. I would find a way into this fic and kill him myself.

The king moved, moved with swiftness that Goku would have thought was long gone from his limbs giving the decayed nature of his body, but the King was worthless against his father--I am happy that Vegeta's Father did attempt to stop Bardock and happy Va dia didn't have to kill his father or anything like that.

Froze the Prince solid and hacked through him until he shattered like glass, and all that remained of the crowned prince was little chunks of read ice on the floor of the throne room.--that is cruel of you to put this!!! It was real and I was like about to cry and then I got to the next paragraph and I finally could breathe again!!!! Cruel! you cruel, cruel woman. I was like what a twist...he can't be dead...

and Vegeta was laughing.
Cackling.
--*is slightly alarmed*

made the fuck fall to his knees and scream, --I'm glad he fell to his knees.

she wiped the tears off his face with her hand and licked them off her fingers. �You are truly something precious.� --that is so sad it just tugs y bly blackened icy unloving heart and makes me want to cry. I feel so badly for him, and I wish it didn't have to be this way for him.

Trunks raised the sword�--AHHHHH! whre is the rest of the story!?!?!?!?!? hehe...

*would pat him, but the king is dead, so doesn�t *--rofl

Its actually been somewhat a challenge to come up with ways to make him even more disturbing, twisted and evil.--well you did a superb job b/c I hate him! and he is very twisted. I know what you mean about Angelus..that was SO dissapointing.

^.*
-MB-

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From ANON - EleneK on May 30, 2004
I'm sorry I haven't reviewed in a while. I've been out of town and trying to finish my own writing... Any who, I'm finally caught up and am now jumping up and down with glee. I love torture and that thing with Bardock and Goku's memories was just evil. Which of course means that I absolutely adored it. I do feel sorry for Vegeta though. He is surrounded by all that raw physical power and has none of his own. pposppose having the political power helps even the score out some but eventually he'll need the physical power just to keep the political power. Go GOTEN!!!! Did I nail that theology or what? I now am worried about Krillin. Is he dying? Is he living? I don't like the idea that he can't go home. The Juro Gods should be punished just for being anoying and stupid. I don't like them. AS for the next chapter being bloody... Bring it on!

-El-
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From ANON - jaygoose on May 29, 2004
Oh yes! Yes! *shutters in delight* Bardock must die!
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From ANON - jaygoose on May 28, 2004
That was so good that I want to cry. It was action packed and dramatic and just wonderful. I am a bit worried about Krillin though.
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From ANON - Mechanical Butterfly on May 27, 2004
Bardock looked just a tad too happy for Vegeta�s liking, but he wasn�t about to ask what the hell was making Bardock grin like that. --Please someone smack that stupid grin off of his face.

The old King looked up and blinked his eyes, slowly as if filled with lead that wore him down to the bone, and then in a voice that was nothing of what he remembered croaked: �Son?� --how sad -_- not!

The words were not in a language he knew, but there was the image of Goten, of his body as it was wrapped up in the bleached-white cloud of the Juro wrath and ripped open.--Oh no! Please let someone save him, he doesn't deserve to die!

�Just like a whore belongs,� Bardock snapped, �On his knees.�--for that sentence alone Bardock should suffer tremendously.

�Thought you could come and take what doesn�t belong to you?�-- -_- Ugh! I just want him to die! He is making me so mad. That throne is rightfully Vegeta's! *shakes both fists at Bardock* Take that! :)

He tried to figure out how to say that Goten wasn�t him, that his personality was slipping, but there was blood spouting out of his body and without his mind to heal himself, he could die there. --that is so sad. I don't want Goten to die and hopefully he won't.

I am very glad Goten is ok, but that whole scene had me O_O. I thought it was cool how Trunks knew to put his hand across Goten's mouth and make him fight....to live his own life with his own mind.

and they ripped the mark of the Juro from him, wrapped his mind up in their hand and tore away all his powers justtheythey turned to strike at Goten again.--but they did not kill him...and I have a feeling he isn't going to die. I do wonder what the Juro Gods have in store for him.

and Goten was there, still bearing the marks of the Juro, but every scar that had once lined his body was gone.--*wipes tears of joy away* Awww that is great! A bit of happiness in the midst of such sorrow and pain.

�Really. Quick, someone fuck me.� He giggled. --LoL

�REALLY!� he yelled, �He�s fucking killing Vegeta!�--O_O! NOOOOOOOOOO! Vegeta must live! He can take my life...

^.*
-MB-

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From ANON - macha on May 27, 2004
My thoughts exactly, "Noooooooo, Vegeta!"

I am glad that the Sayian Gods saved Goten from the Juro Gods. I feel sorry for Krillin. His Gods are so weird.

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From ANON - Mechanical Butterfly on May 27, 2004
That glared down at them, and Vegeta (who was also knocked on his ass by the thing that was not a wall)--LoL

She kept the comment of �he didn�t do a great job, --hehe...yeah that is what I was thinking. I was surprised to see Nappa myself though.

(Vegeta�s whole body was like the size of this guys hand) --awww Ve is is so cute! He is so little!

�Obviously he exaggerates.�--he is so cool!

*gasp* Vegeta's mind is unprotected! I am worried!

Goten smirk and he was starting to think he might have just fallen a wee bit in love with the Prince.--hehe, and who wouldn't.

ntinnting so long and with such great focus that it was very possible he missed the carnage and chaos around him. --wow I am impressed amazamazed. He missed everything going on around him.

He deserved tel tel the pain of it, the shame of it forever and ever until he got so sick from it he couldn�t breath. --I agree and that almost seems like a harsh punishment...but it is enough to upset you to see the very person that murdered his own son remorsing...a person who has brought an onslaught of pain to all of these ppl...has done it for years. You don't want to see him cry you want to see him suffer.

and Goten would have kicked him, but he was just a shadow in this world.--LoL

and his picture would be taken off the wall of the Juro palace. He would be forgotten as if he never lived.--that is so.

.

And what is happening with Goten?! Why is he seeing the stuff he is seeing...*is worried*
I love this chapter it was awesome!

^.*
-MB-

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From ANON - macha on May 26, 2004
What a sick mind Bardock has, to regret having killed his son, only to have him living agian and gain Goku's forgiveness, just to start trying to kill him all over again. I had almost felt sorry for him, and then he goes and does that in Goten's mind trap.

I am surprised that Bulma didn't think to maktra tra dampeners as a just in case. So now I have to ask, "What WAS Veget thinking?"

So even Trunks has limits on who not to kill. Nice to know. I mean, I kind of gathered that already, but it was good to see it in practice.
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From ANON - Mechanical Butterfly on May 26, 2004
Spiders� bodies realized the limits of their powers, naturally, and shut down the mind as soon as they felt it had been reached. --that is very interesting, and mixed with him being saiyajin sounds complicated. Part of him wanting to shut down the other half wanting to fight to the death.

One day they would lose..... �Not today,� he whispered. --I really admire Goten and how he always seems to encourage ppl when he has been through so much pain physically and mentally and continues to endure pain. But he amazes me.
If I went through what he went through I would be bitching all the time all day long.

�Go already. It�s pretty much a fucking worthless day if your ass dies.�--Spoken like a true brother...lol I loved that line.

Felt his mind getting tighter around Bardock as that disgusting thing he called a mind replayed the vision. --Loved this!

and he felt a sense of deep dread that he might not make it out of this fight without having to take their life. And he knew that somehow it was his father�s fault that this was the case, and he hated him more and more.--that is sad...and too bad this is how he has to feel about his father. So sad to think he thought for so long his father was the one who saved him, but that was a lie...instead his father is on the the most evil men I know...and a traitor of his own son.

Then he turned his back again, raised the sword that hummed with power in the frozen massacre.--beautfiul, I loved that.

Watched it burn the blood into the floor and etch the shadows of the dead into the walls.--wow...very pwerful, very cool.
and Trunks sounds pretty damn amazing also!

This chapter was so awesome! and I am so excited to read more...but then again I am always excited to reore.ore.

^.*
-MB-

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From ANON - macha on May 25, 2004
Ah, gore! I loved it.
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From ANON - Mechanical Butterfly on May 25, 2004
�So what happens after this, Vege Aft After you�re the King?�--What a great question. I have been waiting for that question to be asked.

But tonight, there would be words, he guess, because eventually everyone had to speak.--I love that...and they have gone a long while w/o speaking, at least speaking like this.

�But there was never a choice.�--that is so horrible...
this chap is so good! I loved the whole conversation between Vegeta and Goku...and it is so strange to hear Vegeta say that name (Goku). But wow such emotion, I loved it so much.

Didn�t want anything but to know that he hadn�t destroyed the Prince, and Vegeta finally spoke again, all he said was: �Death is not good enough for that fuck.�--beatiful, and I agree death is not good enough...

*sighs * But the Saiyan Prince out-uked him. � � � Now that�s a contest I�d like to see.--lmao!!! I'd love to see that contest any day!

This chap was excellent!

-------------------
ch 32

Bowed his head to the piousness of the young Prince and advised him that too much praying was as horrible a sin as too little. --WHAT!!! That is so insane. If I was born into that race of ppl I jus just die. I am so in shock about that, geez I would REALLY REALLY hate to be Krillen.

Like a leech, she said, sucking her away into nothing and perverting her body beyond even her ability to forgive.�--how truly sad that is, that is a strong hate.

And she had kept me only to fatten me up and eat me. She ate my mother. --@_@! That is disgusting! Gotens life is insane yet sad.

Then he raised his hand. �A mistake that I can unmake.� --These dreams are very good! And Bardock is very cruel.
Poor Goten for having to have these dreams...

WOO HOO THE PALACE!!!! I can't wait!

^.*
-MB-

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From ANON - macha on May 24, 2004
Dang, the Juro Gods aren't easy to please, are they.

I would have to agree with Bulma's sentements, that was a very morbid thing to ask, but fitting concidering the circumstances.

Interesting the the Juro God's have to affirm that Goten isn't as strong as them. Someone would think that they were trying to hide something.
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