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Reviews for Abysmal

By : LaRieaux
  • From Robyn on July 08, 2007
    GAH! TOO SHORT! Okay, so I finally got around to finding this and reading it. Bulma's digging into Chichi's emotional state has got to be rough, not to mention nosy. But maybe Chichi needs someone to be nosy right now.

    I hope she finds a pleasant get away at Capsule Corp, and that the kids don't get into too much trouble while she is away. *crosses fingers*
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  • From ultistarmon on April 30, 2007
    This is actually pretty great. I usually don't like Chichi one bit, but you actually made me feel a little sorry for her.
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  • From ANON - Macha on July 15, 2006
    okay, thanks for letting us know.
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  • From ANON - cas on July 03, 2006
    Gosh! You paint Chi-Chi's life and feelings with Goku exactly as I pictured them. Definitely true to life. It took me a while to see it in the ainme, but Goku is an astoundingly stupid man. God help Chi-Chi. I don't blame her for taking a frying pan to his skull every once in a while. Maybe you'll see that he grows a brain later on in the story, this is only chapter 1 after all. But then again, that wouldnt be canon, especially after DB-GT. By the way, very good writing.
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  • From ANON - oznerol on June 21, 2006
    havent been on this site in a while bu tjut read your new chapter and well ITS ABOUT TIME. update soon me like it
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  • From ANON - Camaro on June 12, 2006
    WOW! hahahah WOW! It has been a LONG TIME since I read this, so I had to go through once more but.... God DAMN LaRieaux, nothing has changed. Except, I will say one thing has... as good as you were before, you are... 10 times better now. I didn't even know that was a possibility!

    Just your wording in this chapter alone was humbling. I believe one line in particular really struck me.. when you wrote "stagnant stream of life" I was just... struck with the poetic deepness of that sentence, of how much a reader has to pull back just for a moment to even IMAGINE a life like that.

    A life with so little happiness... I can't even imagine myself.

    And yet, how INSANE, positively INSANE it is that the last person ANYONE would suspect, she's finding this ... this odd moment of wrongness and yet, rightness all at once. This story is so far off the cannon couples... in fact, SO original entirely! Yet, an often portrayed "harpy" or "bitch" like ChiChi, is seen as someone almost everyone can relate to suddenly, perhaps in ways we don't really want to allow ourselves.

    I like that Yamcha says "you don't really seem to know it, but you are beautiful." I just thought, MAN, for as often as the guy is given a bad name, that was so upstanding of him. And observant. My only fear is that ChiChi will weigh too much of herself on him, that if he doesn't turn out to be a good guy, it'll just be the last straw to entirely destroying her.

    Crazy... please PLEASE update sooner this time ok?! hahaha

    Camaro
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  • From ANON - Macha on June 12, 2006
    WOW!!! Long time no see! And with an update to boot!


    Hmm....well, as much as I am NOT a Yamcha fan, Goku doesn't seem to be giving Chichi what she thinks she needs. I am surprised at her will to make it this far. Now, if she can just turn away from the cliff face, I think she has some confrontations to have.

    On the other hand, I don't trust Yamcha, for all I know, he may just be being the smooth talker he always has been, and that kiss with Chichi doesn't mean as much to him as it did to her.


    Glad to see you are back!
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  • From ANON - Makota on October 23, 2005
    Very very well done.

    *claps*

    I'd very much like to see more.

    Great job!
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  • From JebusOfNazareth on July 30, 2005
    That last line is killer. Its gotten tighter, so I like that. But man, that last line. Jeez. Awesome.

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  • From ANON - PRoyalAngel on July 01, 2005
    stupid goku. i should do a super saiyen up his ass. maybe chi-chi isn't "satisfied" because goku is too "small".hehehehehe.
    Continue. I luv ur writng style. ^__^
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  • From ANON - oznerol on June 25, 2005
    now, i dont like yamacha but this is a good fic and ill shall read more update soon and try to progress a lil' faster
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  • From ANON - Vegeta\'s Mate on June 22, 2005
    Aw, poor ChiChi. I feel bad for the unappreciated mother and wife. I have been sympathetic to her plight in the show and now reading this rendition for her home and personal life I feel as though she was a character that was created just to be there, not given much life or feeling if any.

    Very good job, keep up the great work!

    V.M.
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  • From ANON - Macha on June 22, 2005
    I could totally feel Chichi's loneliness.

    I am wondering what Yamcha's respose is going to be the her last statement.
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  • From ANON - Vegeta\'s Mate on April 27, 2005
    I like it alot, glad that Goten is giving his mama some attention^^
    I wonder if Chichi and Yamcha will hit it off after she kicks Goku to the curb? She seems to look at him through different eyes and I think Chichi and Yamcha would make an excellent couple! Great Job! Update soon!

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  • From ANON - Vegetapr69 on April 24, 2005
    I waited until chspter 2 to review you...and I can finally see a fanfic that shows chi-chi's unhappy life,,,,her true side. Please continue with this line, you're doing it pretty good.
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