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Reviews for Preserving the Species

By : Chris9724
  • From MickGesitt on September 05, 2021

    Intreaguing take on the start of the DBZ series. The writing and dialogue could use a little work. The phrasing comes across as clunky in certain places. For example referring to Goku's cum as "white stuff" and a Senzu Bean as a "small green thingy" were awkward and immature. But despite your strange word choices and odd phrasing, your intent and meaning still shined through and the story's plot was creative enough to catch my interesting. Also it's PRESERVING not preseving.

    Seeing a Saiyan other than Raditz come to find Goku on earth is a different change of pace than the usual 'I am your brother -- and now I'm dead'. Goku's only real sexual experience comes from Chichi so this is a kind of battle that he's out of his depth in. But if there's one thing Goku's great at - it's getting the crap kicked out of him by a more powerful opponent and then somehow finding a way to come back stronger and defeat them.

    A few things have me curious. First, how is Fasha still alive? Was she simply not with the rest of Bardock's squad when they were all murdered by Dodria's squad? And then how did she survive Planet Vegeta being blown up? Was she off planet doing something else?

    How strong actually is Fasha? You only showed Piccolo's power level of 390 in this chapter... and we can extrapolate that Goku is a little stronger than him. I'm curious what he's actually up against. I think I read somewhere that Fasha's power level during the Bardock movie was around 4,000. Which puts her about level with Nappa. Has she exploited the Saiyan Race's ability to get stronger after being brought near death to increase her own power level in the 23 years since that time?

    Also, if this whole story is about perseRving the Saiyan species, then why did they decide for Fasha to mate with Kakarot - a lower class weakling who went mising after failing to conquer a weak planet like Earth? There are only a handful of Saiyans left. Fasha is quite possibly the last pure Saiyan female that's still alive. If crossbreeding with so other races is so looked down upon, then why doesn't she mate with Prince Vegeta instead? He's the one with the highest power level. Fasha made it seem like breeding with Kakarot was a mission. Did Fasha have some choice in the matter? If Raditz is missing, then did Fasha choose Kakarot simply because he's Bardock's son? It sounds like they're deliberately choosing to breed their last female with a pathetic runt of a mutt as opposed to a quality showdog with a royal pedigree. Seems like an odd plot hole.

    I'll keep reading either way. Hopefully I'll find some answers to my questions in the next chapter. Let's see if Goku can make it through his sexual encounter with Fasha. There wasn't any actual sex in this first chapter but I guess Fasha is trying to toughen him up so he'll be able to survive the mating process. She apparently needs him so she can't afford to break him... yet. We don't want Goku dying from a crushed pelvis. The phrase "Death by Snu Snu!" is ringing through my head now.

     

    P.S.: Why is this story coming up in the Beyblade section? You might want to fix that along with the spelling mistake in the title.


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