rate_review Reviews

*Gasp* Goku...Thinking? *runs off screaming* \"It\'s the end of the world!\" *comes back and breathes deeply* Ok, I\'m fine now. I love Goku in this one. It\'s easy to tell that he is a favorite of yours. I think that in most people\'s stories you cell ell when a character is favored over another one. That is definitely not a bad thing, because in usually aids the writing more than it hinders it.

Vegeta is definitely extremely emotional, which is strange for some one who seemingly tries to hide his emotions all the time. I can\'t wait for the next chapter. This fic is very interesting.

Look at me! Reviewing again, a day late but still reviewing.
And guess what!!! I updated my story (its been a month! U_U). I quite proud of myself this week. ^_^

Now on with the review...
This fic really captivates me, I sit there reading with me eyes glued to the computer screen cus it\'s so good!
Like I said in my last review, the way your characters are represented in this fic so different, so in character.
Vegeta\'s chara is is really intriguing, I wonder whats going on with him???

Looking forward to the next chap!!! ^_^

Lovely Chapter!

Ridiculous, of course, because he was born of generations of Princes and he was the higher of them. He didn’t need to wait for anyone’s permission to do anything.--that\'s right! You do what you want! that is great, so Vegeta!

And as he stood there, braced against the attack that wasn’t coming, --lovely line beautfiully written

“If we are going to spar, than you would need to attack.”--rofl!!!

“So that’s what’s taking so long.” He dropped out of fighting stance and crossed his arms over his chest. “Have you had a thought yet?”--rofl he is so mean!

They weren’t friends. But it was nice to have someone who could punch you twelve times in the gut, knee you in the ribs and knock you into the ground, and yet, know that they didn’t really want you dead.--rofl! Sounds like fun! What a lovely hallmark card that would make. I can see it now!

Except dusting off his pants. Which would be a silly thing for Vegeta to tell him to stop doing.--yeah that would be silly...unless Vegeta wanted to brush his pants off for him...then that would just be...well it would get them closer to sex I\'m sure!

Picking the non-existent lint off his shirt again.--I loved this line! Wonderful imagery of Vegeta actually doing this! Love it, love it!

“Are we going to fight today are should I be expecting you to try and think?”--LoL aww leave Kakarott alone you meanie pants!!!!

“Because that is your Saiyan name, Kakarot. Why do you let these earth morons call you anything but your true name? Don’t you have any pride?”--Yeah Goku..*reads line again and doesn\'t want to be an earth moron* err...Kakarott where\'s your pride!?

“Well; you’re always telling me that I don’t ‘have pride’ and all that. But you never say anything about what I’m supposed to be proud of.” He actually struck the Prince speechless.--Go Goku! er...Kakarott!

Vegeta: We’re Saiyans, idiot, we will always be hot.

Gk: Sigh. Now we have to sit around, look hot, and wait for the sex.--rofl! loved that!

I really love this story and it is one of my favorite fics that I look forward to reading. I love the buildup of the storyline, love how it is written, just love everything about it!
^.*
-MB-

This is moving along at a nice steady pace, we\'re getting a small peek into the minds of Vegeta and Goku and I love the way that you currently have them interacting with each other.

There\'s a sign of a budding friendship, yet neither really knows the other well enough to sit down and totally relax in each other\'s presence.

I did enjoy this:

“So that’s what’s taking so long.” He dropped out of fighting stance and crossed his arms over his chest. “Have you had a thought yet?”

*smiles* So very Vegeta :-)
e hoe how Goku actually struck Vegeta speechless with his point about mentioning pride but not mentioning why he should be proud. Looks like Goku may have finally found a way to start to breaking through some of Vegeta\'s walls. :-)

Looking forward to more :-)


\"Gk: Too many big words.\"
\"Vegeta: Not the right sort of big words. (i.e. erection. Orgasm. Ecstasty. Etc.)\" LOL!

\"I have the Budokai game and I spend all my time playing it perfecting my Kamehameha.\"

I got my son Budokai 2 for christmas, I am actually sitting here listening to Buu and Vegito battle it out as I type :-)

I\'m really liking this :-)

\"...those parts he never said but relied on her to realize.\"

Well said! You\'ve totally captured the personality of Vegeta in this scene :-)

I totally loved the way that you expressed Vegeta\'s thought\'s in the opening scenes...I completely agree with them as well...it is exactly how I believe that Vegeta would perceive things, it\'s all part of who he is - A Saiyan...The Prince. And ...it\'s amazing really...I know you\'re more of a Goku fan than Vegeta and yet you express him so much better than some actual Vegeta fans...myself included (I tend to get too damn mushy and have to keep revi) () (I\'m not talking about AU\'s here...playing with personalities is fine in AU\'s) And although this is partial AU (IMO) you are nonetheless, writing this story around the personalities from the regular DBZ timeline and (again, IMO) have captured the essence of who Vegeta is, remarkably well! :-)

God I hope all of that made sense. :-)

Loved the scene with Goku and Vegeta. I must confess that I originally pictured a more upset Goku...but that\'s because I sometimes wander off into the path of soppiness (which is why I\'ll never be as good a writer as you) Your interpretation of Goku\'s reaction is actually, for me, quite realistic, because in spite of the existence of the dragonballs, I have always seen Goku as mewhmewhat stoic personality and his reaction to ChiChi\'s death is realistic. Yes he would mourn for her, but he\'d do it \'Goku style\'

As for Vegeta fronting up for a spar on a Thursday (his way of offering solace) Yes, I can see this as well. I really loved this:

\"(Wondered if Vegeta realized that he had just been nice to him.)\"

LOL! Vegeta would never admit it ;-)

I\'m definitely looking forward to more of this. :-)


\"Vegeta: If I spent less time being indignant about my dead planet I could get more sex.\"

LOL! Loved this and the rest of the dialogue...definitely lightened up the sombre mood of the chapter :-)

No need for apologies :-) Love your stories!

Hello, I\'m back!!! To sum up my absense in one word... BUSY (I just somehow managed to make it through the week. ^^)
I was trying to catch up on my reading when I found this story... (I have nearly finished reading Crossed-eyed. ^_^)

I actually felt sad, sad for Chi-chi, sad that she was dieing. Well RIP
This is such a dramatic mood change from your other story\'s, but it still holds its sniplets of humour that have me ROTFL! ^-^
\'He had acutually had more comfortable conversations with poisonous snakes.\' - that was a classic!
Ahe Mhe Mud wrestling with penguins... that could be interesting. O_o

I am in the process of reading (catching) up with your other fics, sorry for my slowness. I\'ll review as soon as i can.
This is the only break I\'ve had all week and I am now heading to bed... (even though its only 9.00pm)

I am loking forward to you next update, (and reading your other fics) ^_^

*sighs* Very sad chapter, but very well written. I am very drawn to this story. I actually felt kinda sad when ChiChi died...
Aww how sweet of Vegeta coming to ask Goku to spar on a day that they weren\'t even supposed to spar on...I am excited to see what will unfold.
^.*
-MB-

I enjoyed this chapter - I definitely like this!

I loved the little scene between Vegeta and Trunks, it was the sort of conversation that could be found between a parent and child in any number of households and had a ring of authenticity to it.

I know that Vegeta and Goku are going to be \'bumping uglies\' (LOL) eventually and I look forward to that very much, but currently, I am enjoying the inner thoughts of both Saiyans in regard to the other.

“Hey, ‘Geta,” there was the annoyance again. LOL! So Vegeta :-)

This next bit amused me greatly.

\"As the babbling went on, he realized that he was pretty near the bottom of the list of people that Kakarot had gone to. He, the Prince of Saiyans, was at the bottom of list.\"

I can definitely see why Vegeta gets pissed off with Goku sometimes. LOL!

Loved this:
“Please reach the point before we grow old and die, Kakarot.”

I can hear Vegeta\'s dry, yet somewhat tired, sarcasm in every word of this sentence. :-)

The scenes with Goku and ChiChi were touchingly tender and sad. The fact that she is dying and has not told her family is a testament to her inner strength, although she should tell them eventually as a \'sudden\' death would be harder on her family. The fact that Goku knows and is keeping this knowledge to himself (no doubt due to the fact that he suspects that she doesn\'t want him to know just yet) is heartbreaking. His thoughts in regards to her illness seem, at first glance, to be of that of a caring, but casual, observer and it\'s not until this...

\"Held her up with(is this meant to be without?) her noticing as she sagged against him. Felt the annoyance that was brewing in him get darker.\"

...that it becomes clear that he is more troubled by this than he shows. I have a feeling that something could blow in our
tender-hearted Earth Saiyan if ChiChi and he don\'t sit down and bring this out in the open...

Oh God...I loved this:

\"...As if lint mattered when he was going to be covered in mountain debris in a few moments anyway.\"

LOL! I also love the whole \'bored Prince\' posture and his \'offended\' comment about lateness :-)

Oooh, and something is definitely building up in Vegeta as well...could be that \"Clash of the Titans\" will have nothing on \"Clash of the Saiyans\" or it\'s possible that I have no idea at all what I\'m talking about. LOL! Either way, this is shaping up to be a very interesting fic.

Looking forward to the next chapter :-)

Loved the end dialogue between Goku & Vegeta LOL!


\"...And Goku is the one that thinks the Prince saying his Saiyan name was some sort of bad thing.\"

Ahh! My mistake...I thought he was saying what Vegeta actually thought.

\"...So, I’ll apologize about that to anyone who likes Veg&Bulma.\"

No, t's n's not what I meant...I\'m sorry if the way I word things led you to that misunderstanding. I was responding to that bit under your warnings, when you said:

\"Whilst mostly I strive to make this “in character” and not “AU”\"

It was my(obviously)poor attempt at congratulating you on keeping them in character, even though it is an AU...using my V&B bit as an example of why I consider it an AU. Which BTW, is fine with me...I love AU\'s. Yes I am a V/B fan, but also a Goku(Kaka)/Vege fan and an R/V and Br/V fan as well...so I wasn\'t complaining or anything. Please accept my apologies for any misunderstanding.

Good start! You have definitely captured nternterest. I can (in the main) actually see Vegeta thinking this way, and even though it is somewhat AU (due to the fact that in the show Vegeta & Bulma definitely had strong feelings for each other at this stage) You have easily managed to keep Vegeta pretty well in character :-)

I very much like the way you have portrayed both Vegeta and Goku.

I really liked the part when Vegeta rationialised his fusion with Goku as a moment of weakness - that sounds very Vegeta!

I do however, disagree with your version of his rationale for calling Goku \"Kakarot\" though. I always saw that as Vegeta considering him worthy enough to be called by his Saiyan name...which is a sense of honour and pride for Vegeta. I honestly believe that if Vegeta ever got to the point where he no longer saw Kakarot as Saiyan, then he would, as a sign of his disgust, start calling him by his Earth name of Goku.

Really enjoyed the conversation between Goku and Vegeta, it showed all the signs of a (still) uneasy alliance between the two.

I am looking forward to what the future storylines will bring.

Keep it coming :-)

he was an incredibly obvious stalker. --LoL that is so cute.

“Please reach the point before we grow old and die, Kakarot.”--rofl, that sounds like Vegeta...loved it.

He wanted to mud-wrestle with pelicans, Vegeta thought, because that was the only obvious thing.
That if he mud-wrestled with penguins in Antarctica it would be more interesting.--rofl that was hilarious...where did it come from? Love hearing the Ouji\'s little thoughts.

But she was not a Saiyan. And he would be bound to nothing less. --I love that...

Which meant, he realized, that he would be alone for eternity because noble, warrior Super Saiyan women did not just fall out of the sky.---but delicious Kakarott\'s can fall out of the sky and goregeous Vegeta\'s can catch them

but that didn’t meant that Vegeta was going to get all in-touch with his feelings while he tried to pummel Goku into the ground.--ROFL!!!!

There was only so many times he could defeat Vegeta before he was sure that his little shrug ‘Hey, ‘Geta it doesn’t matter’ speech would fail completely and he would end up having a real fight to the death.--aww so sad, but true...not to mention very funny!

I loved the fight scene and the conversation the two saiyajins had while fighting!
I love it ALL!!!!
^.*
-MB-