schedule
April 20, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Looks interesting. I wiil read more when available.
You must have typing speed faster that 40 WPM.
Higher than mine atm.
I appreciate all the hard work and effort you put into
your stories.
Keep \'em comiing. :-)
You must have typing speed faster that 40 WPM.
Higher than mine atm.
I appreciate all the hard work and effort you put into
your stories.
Keep \'em comiing. :-)
schedule
April 20, 2004 at 12:00 AM
I am interested!! Imensly!! Next chapter!!! Need next chapter! Please!
in despiration
Prisma Kakkerra
in despiration
Prisma Kakkerra
schedule
April 20, 2004 at 12:00 AM
\"Confused?\" \"Interested?\" \"Think I’m insane?!\"
A little. Deeply interested. Oh shit yeah! But that\'s a good thing ;-)
This first chapter has totally captivated me. Your description of the, obviously drugged, or controlled, Vegeta was pure poetry. Your description of this particular den of iniquity (into which the hapless Vegeta has fallen victim), as seen through the eyes of Goku was superbly written.
The surface atmosphere seemed to be one of almost reverence as Goku looked in on Vegeta\'s sultry performance, however; Goku\'s thoughts after Vegeta acknowledged his presence, quickly allowed us to see the seedier undertones of this nasty establishment.
Seems as if Goku himself had once been where Vegeta now is. He certainly seems to have a particular abhorrence foeizaeiza (*shudder* - easily understandable), yet, Freiza doesn\'t seem to recognise him at all. Not sure then, if I\'ve misinterpreted Goku\'s thoughts, or if he has indeed suffered through a similar situation, but with someone else as his \'owner\'.
Deeply interested in why Goku keeps thinking about \'Freedom\' in such a manner. It seems like he has deep regrets as to how he has gained his freedom. Did he possibly lose someone important to him?
Gods, I loathe Freiza!
I like the almost metaphorical quality of the fact that Vegeta was sitting upon a pedestal as Goku watched him, feeling almost awed at the beauty displayed before him. Followed by the action of Vegeta climbing down from the pedestal in a totally disinterested manner.
Really loved the way you had Goku constantly checking himself to make sure he stayed \'in acteacter\', so as to not give himself away to the watchful Freiza.
Curious as to who Goku\'s diminutive friend could be.
You really do have a way with words. Vegeta\'s whole demeanour in the private bedroom, is in one way, totally erotic (particularly the finger sucking), yet in another, so clinical, so divorced from the reality of his life...I didn\'t know whether to be aroused or heartbroken...Ultimately, I felt heartbroken, thanks to Goku\'s tender actions with the hairbrush, his tormented thoughts, and his frantic need to remain aroused, when clearly he was not...even though, Vegeta himself so obviously, is a total fascination for him. His sense of feeling as if he would be betraying Vegeta was paramount in his thoughts, and I read this scene with a strong sense of the tragedy of it all.
I am naturally wondering what particular world they are currently on. Goku also seems to know who Vegeta is, knows his importance, and has memories of his own father, so I\'m assuming that he is in fact, Kakarot in this, and \'Goku\' is either part of his disguise, or a name he was given (if he was indeed in a similar position to Vegeta at one time, which it certainly seems like.)
I hope he can break Vegeta from all of this, and they can both overcome whatever demons they both would have from their individual experiences. But, how horrible this is all going to be for the Prince of the Saiyans, once he realises what he was turned into, whilst he was under whatever influence Freiza has him under. Gods, having just thought of this, has me wondering about Goku\'s attitude to his newfound freedom...Is this possibly what he means? The price of Freedom, is the truth of what he had been? The idea is...terribly tragic. I\'m glad that Vegeta has Goku, and hope that soon, Goku will have Vegeta. Something tells me that these two are going to need each other very much.
A well-written, deeply moving, first chapter, and I am definitely looking forward to the next.
A little. Deeply interested. Oh shit yeah! But that\'s a good thing ;-)
This first chapter has totally captivated me. Your description of the, obviously drugged, or controlled, Vegeta was pure poetry. Your description of this particular den of iniquity (into which the hapless Vegeta has fallen victim), as seen through the eyes of Goku was superbly written.
The surface atmosphere seemed to be one of almost reverence as Goku looked in on Vegeta\'s sultry performance, however; Goku\'s thoughts after Vegeta acknowledged his presence, quickly allowed us to see the seedier undertones of this nasty establishment.
Seems as if Goku himself had once been where Vegeta now is. He certainly seems to have a particular abhorrence foeizaeiza (*shudder* - easily understandable), yet, Freiza doesn\'t seem to recognise him at all. Not sure then, if I\'ve misinterpreted Goku\'s thoughts, or if he has indeed suffered through a similar situation, but with someone else as his \'owner\'.
Deeply interested in why Goku keeps thinking about \'Freedom\' in such a manner. It seems like he has deep regrets as to how he has gained his freedom. Did he possibly lose someone important to him?
Gods, I loathe Freiza!
I like the almost metaphorical quality of the fact that Vegeta was sitting upon a pedestal as Goku watched him, feeling almost awed at the beauty displayed before him. Followed by the action of Vegeta climbing down from the pedestal in a totally disinterested manner.
Really loved the way you had Goku constantly checking himself to make sure he stayed \'in acteacter\', so as to not give himself away to the watchful Freiza.
Curious as to who Goku\'s diminutive friend could be.
You really do have a way with words. Vegeta\'s whole demeanour in the private bedroom, is in one way, totally erotic (particularly the finger sucking), yet in another, so clinical, so divorced from the reality of his life...I didn\'t know whether to be aroused or heartbroken...Ultimately, I felt heartbroken, thanks to Goku\'s tender actions with the hairbrush, his tormented thoughts, and his frantic need to remain aroused, when clearly he was not...even though, Vegeta himself so obviously, is a total fascination for him. His sense of feeling as if he would be betraying Vegeta was paramount in his thoughts, and I read this scene with a strong sense of the tragedy of it all.
I am naturally wondering what particular world they are currently on. Goku also seems to know who Vegeta is, knows his importance, and has memories of his own father, so I\'m assuming that he is in fact, Kakarot in this, and \'Goku\' is either part of his disguise, or a name he was given (if he was indeed in a similar position to Vegeta at one time, which it certainly seems like.)
I hope he can break Vegeta from all of this, and they can both overcome whatever demons they both would have from their individual experiences. But, how horrible this is all going to be for the Prince of the Saiyans, once he realises what he was turned into, whilst he was under whatever influence Freiza has him under. Gods, having just thought of this, has me wondering about Goku\'s attitude to his newfound freedom...Is this possibly what he means? The price of Freedom, is the truth of what he had been? The idea is...terribly tragic. I\'m glad that Vegeta has Goku, and hope that soon, Goku will have Vegeta. Something tells me that these two are going to need each other very much.
A well-written, deeply moving, first chapter, and I am definitely looking forward to the next.
schedule
April 20, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Yep, I am happy that you decided to scribble. I think that this story has a lot of great potential. Waiting for you next update.
schedule
April 20, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Definitely liked the veiw Vegeta had in the first part of the chapter, thinking of Goku as just a faceless \'it\', and how he subconsciously recognized the other. I\'m liking this story more and more, along with all of your other stories.
I can tell that it\'s going to be hard to get the pleasure device off/out of Vegeta, especially when its in the back of his mouth. I wonder how long until Goku figures it out, and how he\'ll get it out of him. I would definitely puke as well if I\'d gone through what Goku had to, but he has to bear it, and so shall I.
Don\'t think it\'s a dumb idea, and I\'m anxiously waiting for tomorrow\'s chapter to see what happens. I kinda feel sad for Goku, but it will get better, I just know it. *Shudders at thought of being under Frieza\'s control, and the coming phrase (also name of strange band).* The darkness *deep shudder* of this fic is excellent, and I almost wish that there was more, so I can enjoy the angst, and then laugh later when the humor comes in. Humorous angst, gotta love it, \'specially from Card.
I can tell that it\'s going to be hard to get the pleasure device off/out of Vegeta, especially when its in the back of his mouth. I wonder how long until Goku figures it out, and how he\'ll get it out of him. I would definitely puke as well if I\'d gone through what Goku had to, but he has to bear it, and so shall I.
Don\'t think it\'s a dumb idea, and I\'m anxiously waiting for tomorrow\'s chapter to see what happens. I kinda feel sad for Goku, but it will get better, I just know it. *Shudders at thought of being under Frieza\'s control, and the coming phrase (also name of strange band).* The darkness *deep shudder* of this fic is excellent, and I almost wish that there was more, so I can enjoy the angst, and then laugh later when the humor comes in. Humorous angst, gotta love it, \'specially from Card.
schedule
April 19, 2004 at 12:00 AM
MMmm. Me like, Me like. Excellent so far, can\'t wait for more, Card. You really have to love a sexy \'Geta. Kinda confused, but more than definitely interested. Can\'t wait for more!! :)
schedule
April 19, 2004 at 12:00 AM
I am curious. Please contine with the story.
schedule
April 19, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Hmm...I\'m not confused, but I am interested. I am worried about the amount of stories you\'re tacklin though. I am impressed.
schedule
April 19, 2004 at 12:00 AM
grrr.... second try at posting this.
This fic is completely captivating. It looks like our prince has been kidnapped and is under mindcontrol of some kind - and I believe you are hinting that Kakarot had once been in the same situation? MORE! I can hardly wait for tomorrow\'s update.
This fic is completely captivating. It looks like our prince has been kidnapped and is under mindcontrol of some kind - and I believe you are hinting that Kakarot had once been in the same situation? MORE! I can hardly wait for tomorrow\'s update.