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for Abysmal

by LaRieaux

person oznerol
schedule June 25, 2005 at 12:00 AM
now, i dont like yamacha but this is a good fic and ill shall read more update soon and try to progress a lil\' faster
person Vegeta\'s Mate
schedule June 22, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Aw, poor ChiChi. I feel bad for the unappreciated mother and wife. I have been sympathetic to her plight in the show and now reading this rendition for her home and personal life I feel as though she was a character that was created just to be there, not given much life or feeling if any.

Very good job, keep up the great work!

V.M.
person Macha
schedule June 22, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I could totally feel Chichi\'s loneliness.

I am wondering what Yamcha\'s respose is going to be the her last statement.
person Vegeta\'s Mate
schedule April 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I like it alot, glad that Goten is giving his mama some attention^^
I wonder if Chichi and Yamcha will hit it off after she kicks Goku to the curb? She seems to look at him through different eyes and I think Chichi and Yamcha would make an excellent couple! Great Job! Update soon!
person Vegetapr69
schedule April 24, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I waited until chspter 2 to review you...and I can finally see a fanfic that shows chi-chi\'s unhappy life,,,,her true side. Please continue with this line, you\'re doing it pretty good.
person Camaro
schedule April 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Very good emotion. If it\'s possible, I actually feel sorry for Chi Chi. Is this going to be a chi chi/yamcha? Seemed a bit like that.

Camaro
person jebus
schedule April 22, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Im sorry. I didn\'t mean cirtical errors. I guess I should have clarified. I am an English Major in college. Your grammar/syntax are fine. Really, for the average reader it\'s good. I just see sentences that could be tightened up. Nothing major, just stuff I would have changed. It\'s just me. Really. Sorry for the confusion.

Gomen
Matthew.
person oznerol
schedule April 22, 2005 at 12:00 AM
what is going on she needs some medicine or something
um a liitle less depresion and a little moe progres next please
thank you
oh man chichineeds a major vacation and fast
person Macha
schedule April 22, 2005 at 12:00 AM
As much as I hate to see Goku portrayed as a \'bad\' guy, I still like this story. It\'s very refreshing to read from Chichi\'s POV. It is also very realistic.

Now to wonder why she asked Yamcha over. Has she even contemplated the implications or her motives for doing so? hehe

Once again, Great Job!
person Jebus
schedule April 22, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Well, it\'s certainly sad. Few grammar/syntax errors. Not a fan of Chi Chi fics, but glad I stopped by. I\'d consider reading the rest.

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