schedule
July 23, 2007 at 12:00 AM
did you seriously say A-spot?
schedule
November 13, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Okie dokie... Roy's emoness with the cutting of wrists... wtf? And Riza not knowing, or not caring? I mean... that's a bit heartless.
schedule
January 5, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Potential, potential...
You have all the needed stuff for a good angst story here, try to avoid too many repetitions and give us a little more insight as to why Roy is cutting himself. If it's because of Riza's distrust, or because of stress, the added responsibility of training another alchemist, all together and none of these-you might also want to try to explain why Riza can shrug off Roy's self-mutilation this easily; either she's
a:) completely dense(and I mean doorknob-like)
b:) so wrapped up in her own hurt and self-pity, that she's basically blind to Roy's pain, or
c:) a possessive bitch who doesn't really care about Roy as long as he doesn't talk with other women
Either way, I would not let this two off the hook that easily; as I said, you have merely scratched the surface here, so try to dig deeper! ^ ~
And for sound advice, you can always turn to me, kay?
*hug*
You have all the needed stuff for a good angst story here, try to avoid too many repetitions and give us a little more insight as to why Roy is cutting himself. If it's because of Riza's distrust, or because of stress, the added responsibility of training another alchemist, all together and none of these-you might also want to try to explain why Riza can shrug off Roy's self-mutilation this easily; either she's
a:) completely dense(and I mean doorknob-like)
b:) so wrapped up in her own hurt and self-pity, that she's basically blind to Roy's pain, or
c:) a possessive bitch who doesn't really care about Roy as long as he doesn't talk with other women
Either way, I would not let this two off the hook that easily; as I said, you have merely scratched the surface here, so try to dig deeper! ^ ~
And for sound advice, you can always turn to me, kay?
*hug*