schedule
March 6, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I really liked this chapter. I think mainly because of the obvious show of connection to Trowa that the other guys have. Up until now, it seemed almost detached, as if Trowa was the odd man out so to speak. This chapter showed a growth. Duo showed he wanted to help by giving the pills to Trowa, even though they managed to fuck him up. Heero was ready to fuck someone up when Trowa screamed. Quatre...he bothers me a little, mostly because of his internal thoughts concerning Trowa's hermaphroditic state. It's understandable, but I'm hoping that Trowa will find someone who will love all of him. Constructively, I think a lot tends to happen in short amounts of time, so some times it is hard to follow everything that is happening. Scenes change abruptly and I feel kinda loss and trying to find my grounding in following the story. It's very well written and very little in terms of grammar errors. I'm still enjoying this. Thanks for posting.
As you can tell, I'm reviewing as I read, so you'll probably end up with a lot of reviews. This story is just too huge for just one review at the end. Also, I feel you about the AFF upload system. It still lags me out a lot.
As you can tell, I'm reviewing as I read, so you'll probably end up with a lot of reviews. This story is just too huge for just one review at the end. Also, I feel you about the AFF upload system. It still lags me out a lot.
schedule
March 6, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I really loved this chapter. While I love reading in Trowa's pov, I really liked seeing Heero's. And I am so happy that Heero wants Trowa. I am curious how things will work out over all for everyone. I am also ecstatic that Fahd is in jail, and will hopefully stay there. I will say that you did make a character that I despised, which is pretty rare for me. I almost couldn't stand to read any scenes with him and skipped all smut involving him and many scenes with him and Trowa. XD. It will be hard for the boys but I'm really anxious to find out just how you're going to work things out :D
schedule
January 24, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Evil, woman... I hate cliff hangers. However, I have to say 'It's about time!!!' The guys have found Trowa, I'm so excited to see what happens. Please, please, please update soon.
schedule
January 16, 2013 at 12:00 AM
You're killing me here!!! I love the details in the latest chapter. The tension when the boys confront Trowa is tangible and almost painful.
schedule
January 16, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Woo... a new chapter. It was awesome. It was awkward and strained between the boys but that is expected. I can't wait to see how their reunion continues to go. And what's wrong with Trowa? Hopefully he doesn't die. I hope you do put the WWII au up when you can. I am interested.
schedule
January 14, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I really, really wish that you would stop telling us about all the other stories your working on and just finish The Chains We Wear. Seriously, haven't all of your readers been waiting long enough?
schedule
November 4, 2012 at 12:00 AM
I didn't want to draw any conclusions, and I didn't want to say anything because I was only speculating on ideas that my own mind had come up with. I was just going to keep the voices in the back of my mind quite because I thought I was totally being insain as far as some of the details of the story where being perseved in my mind. But now I know that I am not alone because I saw that pea-gravel had made a comment on your tumblr page about how they where getting the feeling that Trowa was pregnant too. However, I do know that stress can make you throw up as well, I have a friend that this happens to.
Anyway, good chapter. I do kind of agree with you that this was kind of a filler chapter before the good one (the calm before the storm perhaps). I do hope that you have more plans for Sarah now that you have introduced her. I understand that most writers don't like to introduce characters unless they have some overall purpose because some readers will get attached to that character and wonder what has become of them when they just vanish into the wood work from whence they came (but what do I know, I'm not a writer, just ignore my mutterings).
I feel bad for Trowa, I think the other pilots are going to be in for a shock when they see him again. I really hope the confrontation isn't horrendous, but at the same time I do... (I'm horrible) Trowa is falling apart and waisting away to nothing, i think some tough love is required.
Good luck with your writing, and I eagerly await the next installment!
Anyway, good chapter. I do kind of agree with you that this was kind of a filler chapter before the good one (the calm before the storm perhaps). I do hope that you have more plans for Sarah now that you have introduced her. I understand that most writers don't like to introduce characters unless they have some overall purpose because some readers will get attached to that character and wonder what has become of them when they just vanish into the wood work from whence they came (but what do I know, I'm not a writer, just ignore my mutterings).
I feel bad for Trowa, I think the other pilots are going to be in for a shock when they see him again. I really hope the confrontation isn't horrendous, but at the same time I do... (I'm horrible) Trowa is falling apart and waisting away to nothing, i think some tough love is required.
Good luck with your writing, and I eagerly await the next installment!
schedule
October 19, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Looks like Trowa was right. One month, maybe. Two months, too long. Heero has caught the scent, haha.
I enjoyed this chapter. On the surface, it looks like Trowa's being Tracey and things are OK, but ... there are points that are distinctly strange. I guess most obvious of all would be the part where he accepted the woman's offer at the end of his section? You go as far to state that both Trowa and Tracey should be backing down, but he doesn't. ...I'm just left wondering what impulse drove him to accept...? I mean, I have an inkling, but I'm ... not quite sure...
On that note, I'll have to admit this chapter confused me the most. There was that part that I didn't quite get (but we'll see later). I also didn't really understand the "
"Got it,” he said. Wufei slipped his hands in to the pockets of his jeans. “Heero?”
“Bedroom. Running last minute traces.”
" part. Sorry, this might be a personal gap in comprehension, but ... traces in what? For some reason, I was confused for two seconds and thought that Heero had gone ahead to the US and was pulling through Trowa's bedroom already, haha. Yeah. Not likely... But I did feel what was going on and the setting for the second part required me to reread the part again.
There's also some typo / missing words around.
I like your Wufei. He always struck me as the "stand from afar and watch and protect" type - which is to say he cares, but he doesn't show he cares. Ironically, I thought Zechs was a bit odd in this part, but ... I've never really paid attention to Zechs in the anime, so I really just don't know his character enough ^^;; On that note, I'd love to read a Zechs POV fit into this somehow, haha.
I think I rambled. Thanks for the chapter! You may be late for your deadline, but ... quite honestly, I'm really really happy there's updates and the fic is moving along so quickly ^^ Thank you so much!
I enjoyed this chapter. On the surface, it looks like Trowa's being Tracey and things are OK, but ... there are points that are distinctly strange. I guess most obvious of all would be the part where he accepted the woman's offer at the end of his section? You go as far to state that both Trowa and Tracey should be backing down, but he doesn't. ...I'm just left wondering what impulse drove him to accept...? I mean, I have an inkling, but I'm ... not quite sure...
On that note, I'll have to admit this chapter confused me the most. There was that part that I didn't quite get (but we'll see later). I also didn't really understand the "
"Got it,” he said. Wufei slipped his hands in to the pockets of his jeans. “Heero?”
“Bedroom. Running last minute traces.”
" part. Sorry, this might be a personal gap in comprehension, but ... traces in what? For some reason, I was confused for two seconds and thought that Heero had gone ahead to the US and was pulling through Trowa's bedroom already, haha. Yeah. Not likely... But I did feel what was going on and the setting for the second part required me to reread the part again.
There's also some typo / missing words around.
I like your Wufei. He always struck me as the "stand from afar and watch and protect" type - which is to say he cares, but he doesn't show he cares. Ironically, I thought Zechs was a bit odd in this part, but ... I've never really paid attention to Zechs in the anime, so I really just don't know his character enough ^^;; On that note, I'd love to read a Zechs POV fit into this somehow, haha.
I think I rambled. Thanks for the chapter! You may be late for your deadline, but ... quite honestly, I'm really really happy there's updates and the fic is moving along so quickly ^^ Thank you so much!
schedule
September 22, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Lady Yein Khan,
I really enjoy reading your work. As much as I hate that Trowa is going through this, I think there's no way he wouldn't go through it. Characters really do evolve on their own and your portrayal is wonderful. He's going stir-cray in the latest chapter. I think a lot of people know what it's like to be able to fix other things but not oneself, and he feels it so deeply. I flinched when he dug into his bruise for the sake of some pain.
I have no problem with a poly-friendly view here, but I'm confused as to 01 and 04's reactions in finding out that 03 is a hermaphrodite, given that they both have long-standing interest in him. When the pilots first found out, they all reacted in a similar vein, aghast and accusatory. (I was so mad - 'he didn't tell you because you would react this way! don't you realize the words coming out of your mouth? - you did a good job as an author making me feel so strongly.) The omniscient narrator revealed later on that Quatra had long desired a closer relationship with 03 and was still willing to accept him as he is. Then chapter 18 revealed that Heero desires him. When did Heero start feeling this way; before or after the reveal? You did a good job narrating his thoughts and actions and humanizing him, but his sudden possessiveness makes him seem fickle. You're right in that there would be a long build-up to him expressing it (in a report, no less), but there would also be a long build-up, or at least an epiphany of his desire, which us readers are missing.
Of course, I'm wondering how Trowa is going to survive. Will he make another identity, one that will give him more outlets? Will the other pilots save him, or will they find him when he's ready? What will happen with Fahd? Could Fahd contact and order Nazir to help him? (I thought of how jealous Fahd would be if Trowa got with Christine and smiled.) You gave the right amount of hope, angst, and seriousness in this latest chapter. Hope - that Trowa's hands will become as they were before. Angst - (obvious). Seriousness - Trowa was dying in a way working the Preventor's desk job. He survived by making everything not personal, and then Fahd came along. Now, in another persona, because he has to constantly be aware of character discrepancies and there is no overwhelming must-win-the-war pressure, he can't make things not personal. He can't face his past and fears because he fears they'll crush hi, but not facing them is eating him alive. Just, I guess as a female, I really want someone to LOVE Trowa and for it to be reciprocal. Fahd did a lot of the right things, for the wrong reasons.
Anyway, please keep writing.
- a loyal reader
I really enjoy reading your work. As much as I hate that Trowa is going through this, I think there's no way he wouldn't go through it. Characters really do evolve on their own and your portrayal is wonderful. He's going stir-cray in the latest chapter. I think a lot of people know what it's like to be able to fix other things but not oneself, and he feels it so deeply. I flinched when he dug into his bruise for the sake of some pain.
I have no problem with a poly-friendly view here, but I'm confused as to 01 and 04's reactions in finding out that 03 is a hermaphrodite, given that they both have long-standing interest in him. When the pilots first found out, they all reacted in a similar vein, aghast and accusatory. (I was so mad - 'he didn't tell you because you would react this way! don't you realize the words coming out of your mouth? - you did a good job as an author making me feel so strongly.) The omniscient narrator revealed later on that Quatra had long desired a closer relationship with 03 and was still willing to accept him as he is. Then chapter 18 revealed that Heero desires him. When did Heero start feeling this way; before or after the reveal? You did a good job narrating his thoughts and actions and humanizing him, but his sudden possessiveness makes him seem fickle. You're right in that there would be a long build-up to him expressing it (in a report, no less), but there would also be a long build-up, or at least an epiphany of his desire, which us readers are missing.
Of course, I'm wondering how Trowa is going to survive. Will he make another identity, one that will give him more outlets? Will the other pilots save him, or will they find him when he's ready? What will happen with Fahd? Could Fahd contact and order Nazir to help him? (I thought of how jealous Fahd would be if Trowa got with Christine and smiled.) You gave the right amount of hope, angst, and seriousness in this latest chapter. Hope - that Trowa's hands will become as they were before. Angst - (obvious). Seriousness - Trowa was dying in a way working the Preventor's desk job. He survived by making everything not personal, and then Fahd came along. Now, in another persona, because he has to constantly be aware of character discrepancies and there is no overwhelming must-win-the-war pressure, he can't make things not personal. He can't face his past and fears because he fears they'll crush hi, but not facing them is eating him alive. Just, I guess as a female, I really want someone to LOVE Trowa and for it to be reciprocal. Fahd did a lot of the right things, for the wrong reasons.
Anyway, please keep writing.
- a loyal reader
schedule
September 21, 2012 at 12:00 AM
WooHoo! Happy Birthday to me! Thank you so much for updating. Seems like Trowa is having a hard time keeping up the
Tracey persona. I love the masterbation scene. It was awkard and cringe worthy but in a good way. I could imagine how it went in my mind. Almost made me feel bad about peeking at someone's personal and painful moment. When he heard himself calling himself a disgusting freak was heartbreak. Poor Trowa is finally breaking. Is someone going to be there to help him? Or is he going to continue to be alone? What's the other guys up to? Is he ever going to meet up with Fahd again? I look forward to more.
Tracey persona. I love the masterbation scene. It was awkard and cringe worthy but in a good way. I could imagine how it went in my mind. Almost made me feel bad about peeking at someone's personal and painful moment. When he heard himself calling himself a disgusting freak was heartbreak. Poor Trowa is finally breaking. Is someone going to be there to help him? Or is he going to continue to be alone? What's the other guys up to? Is he ever going to meet up with Fahd again? I look forward to more.