rate_review Reviews

an interesting story - usually i stay away from 'rape' stories and such. But i must say i am enjoying your story. It is very well written, and a great plot or whatever you call it. I just love how it has involved, and how you show the different views on what has happened between Goku and Vegeta (view on their 'affair'). Can't wait for the next chapter !!

You did such a good job of bringing those concepts and metaphors from chapter six and melding them into Vegeta's dream. It just worked so well and re-inforces the fact that everything in this story is linked. I really enjoyed chapter six and I was just waiting to see if you were going to expand on it... and you did - in such a satisfying way for this reader, too. :)

I like the way things are so far from settled at the moment but there's a chance that Goku and Vegeta can understand each other a bit better if they just stop misinterpreting every action and reaction.

I loved the scene where Goku wakes up and leaves to keep himself from giving into his reaction to Vegeta... and oh, he'll just have to unwind this tail from his leg before he leaves. It seems like such a small detail but I liked the apparent significance of it.

I loved this chapter! After all the angst the change of pace was wonerful, and that Vegeta is finally discovering his other, more dominant side is such a relief. The tension between the prince and the twins was just delectable. Can't wait for the next update!

Awww...great chapter! I just LOVED the way you had Vegeta so out of it and defenseless and weak...and Goku had to carry him around all carefully and gently. I LOVE IT! That scene with the rigor mortis was terrifying. I can't even imagine the disgust and horror I'd feel if I couldn't feel my limbs from being dead for a while. I liked how you had Vegeta is a sort of state of shock. Very nice. The dream Vegeta had is quite interesting. It seems his own mind is trying to figure out his life for him. Poor confused guy. I just love all the details you put in that make him so in depth and descriptive. There are so many fanfictions out there that just do not cover Vegeta's real serious mental issues like this one does. So complex....very amazing.

Vegeta's jealousy is another point of interest. It seems that Vegeta cares for Goku even more than he realizes. I almost feel bad for the twins as they have to watch the interaction between the saiyajins. I also very much enjoyed the interaction between Vegeta and Trung. They are both jealous of each other, yet have to live in the environment before Goku's eyes! I loved the dialogue between Vegeta and Goku as the confusion still hovered there. I think your descriptions and details on Goku's frustration and confusion toward Vegeta was excellent. But how can Vegeta explain himself when he doesn't even understand himself?! God...great points here. Have I told you lately that I just love your work? :) Keep it up!

Chatper 15

Awesome chapter! We got to see a bit more into the characters and why they are the way they are. Great job!

I have to admit i love this story ALOT. Abundantly, really. I'm impressed with this chapter more so than any other chapter that you've written so far, and i commend you for the time taken to write it. You have done a fantastic job, and i hope you take that as though it was the first time you ever heard it.

I'll admit that I was not a fan of the other characters and the Smithy realm they live in, and that was probably because of the vagueness of it all, but i like where you have taken it and the way you took it there. I love this story, i love the indepth and dark explanation of actions, thoughts, and feelings, which is part of what you're known for. I also love the fact that the get together involves others, especially others that aren't a part of the normal DBZ scene. I believe it was chayron that mentioned people shy away from threesomes, but here, haha, you've even got a foursome.

I would pinpoint sentances and paragrahs, but I find it almost unnecessary, the review would be too long and boring for me to say "fantastic!" or any other happy plea of wanting more, so instead let me say once more i cannot wait to read the next chapter and i hope I am just as pleased with that one as i am with this one.

You rock, have a fabulous Day,

Trista Michelle

“Hn…it’s not from hypothermia, Kakarott. It’s from rigor mortis.”


Much love for this line!

As much as I want to smack Vegeta upside the head, I'm glad that you have them misunderstanding each other even now, after showing so much of their private selves to each other. I liked his dream and the way his thoughts are changing -- it's painfully slow, but constant, as if all his certainties are crumbling.

Also, Vegeta being made to suck his own tail in order to shut him up was evil. And awesome.

That chapter was intense. Kudos for intricate details, I loved how Goku was actually able to bring Vegeta back to life. Very original.

This has to be one of the most emotionally-engaging pieces I've read in a long time - and I mean that out of everything I read, both fanfic and published fic. I spent most of the first part of the chapter glued way too close to my monitor and I was so involved in it that I could all but feel the coldness of the rain towards the end. The whole chapter forms an amazing turning point for both of the characters and I'm looking forward to seeing the consequences of everything in the next chapter.

I wonder what further repercussions will follow Goku's actions. Especially when he stole what he did. I look forward to more. :)