schedule
June 5, 2012 at 12:00 AM
I really like the concept for this story. The grammar needs a little work which I read you are working on. I am in no way going to say much on the as I too am horrible at it. It was a little hard to read as a lot of the punctuations marks other then the sentence ending ones turned into weird symbols. I think this is something to do with my computer though. I think it would be a little easier to read if you separated out the parts that are where they are speaking. All in all I really do like it and would like to read the rest you have planned for it. :) I am new to this site so I don't know how to add this to my favorites yet. :(