rate_review Reviews

It was good though way too short and I can't help but wonder how did Vegeta end up with Brolli?

HOT

WOW...No. Didn't like that at all.

There was a great deal of intensity packed into this oneshot while still maintaining a clear carefulness and deliberation that made it flow shockingly slickly. You had a nice use of contrast; hot and cold, shame and pleasure, the violent sex that makes the last line all the more poignant. You portrayed both Brolli and Vegeta well in their respective roles, particularly with the lines “Scanning the floor by themselves, his eyes treated him to a full view of everything they had done, making him want to tear his gaze away in shame. Yet he could not say that he hadn’t loved every second.” and with Brolli’s patronizing tone of Vegeta’s supposedly ‘high and mighty’ status throughout. Starting the story already near its ‘climax’ I also thought was a genius move. Another great fanfiction nugget, TCSH. Keep up the good work.
And to whoever this ‘Uh’ person might be, I’ll say this. Reviewing just for the sake of saying ‘I didn’t like it’ is just cruel and somewhat dim. Constructive criticism, yes, but don’t discourage authors because /you chose/ to read something that wasn’t your cup of tea.

A nice piece of D/s smut, well written and consistent.

It feels rather disconnected from the fandom, though. Other than the names and "your highness", I don't think there was anything that really identified the characters. You could probably switch the names and make it work anywhere, including non-fandom porn.