rate_review Reviews

This story is excellent... if you need a beta, i'd happily do it!
I am kind of hoping that Vegeta and Kakarot become mates ^____^ and i love how you've written Raditz into your fanfic... he gets left out a lot :)
Update soon please!!! I must know what happens to Vegeta!
xxxxxxx

What a horrible situation for the boys to be in, glad Kakarot is finding a way to survive it, and helping the other boys as much as he can. I was worried there that Broly would mark him, thankfully he was distracted.

Oh no, Vegeta is going to challenge him! It is what he would do, given his pride, but I fear the worst :(

Sorry you lost confidence, you shouldn't as you are a brillient writer and I love your stories.

I love all your stories as I'm a great fan of yours. Your name is very recognizable and I can't wait to read more of your great works. I especially like how this story is going! I understand how tiresome writing stories are, but please continue with your great work!

Huh? What happened to him when he was younger? Nevertheless, this is a very unique path your taking the story towards which is very different from you earlier dragonball story. It's great! I like the pairing Nappa/Raditz I think their a great match! I am pretty upset that goku is so weak power-wise, but I guess that's how things must be started before one can hope to be stronger. Can't wait for more!

One can always take pride in being the most beautiful and most strong or the best in some way, but there is always a downfall to such benefits such as jealousies or in goku's case too much attention from the wrong party. It is also double bad when you also don't have the power to protect yourself from the unwanted lust from others. it is great though that one can get friends that understand and is willing to protect and teach you ways to protect yourself. Great story...very much wanting more!

OH mY GoD! It's just one thing after another for our poor goku. to think he has a brother in a powerful position, but still the brother does not have the authority with that power to save is brother from the very stupid saiyan prejudice and traditions. i hate the concept where the weak is to be pushed and abused while the strong controls and abuse! There really shoudl be a middle ground where all comes together to be of benefit to each other. Goku is at least smart and understand the meaning of "survival of the fittest"

More please!

OHHH, NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I really thought goku will be able to protect himself, but it seems even the smart has no choice but to accept their situation when they are weak. I also though maybe someone would be able to come save him just in time. I was thinking Vegeta coming to save him and this was how they were to meet, but I guess it just wasn't meant to be. I guess you are trying to showcase how sturdy Goku is in the realm of sex if not power-wise (for the moment at least)? Showing to those powerful and egotistical saiyans that there is some worth in this one damaged good. I was mixed in the part where Broly was preparing to mate him for real and was interrupted. In one side I wanted them together, but on another side I did not want goku to be taken from vegeta. ahhhh!!! choices, choices...hehehe!

Nevertheless, I am very happy that you are continuing the story despite adversity. I very much look up to your preseverance! I would not mind being your beta, but I am not good with grammar and punctuation myself. I don't even know the process for betas either, so unless you are willing to put up with my barely good understanding of grammars then I don't know what other way to offer my help as I really do like this story and wish for you to continue it and update VERy SOON! So, think about it?

i hope u dont wait so long to post the next chapter i would really like to see how this story plays out

Ah, yes, I love how Vegeta stepped up like that. Very, very Vegeta-like, I must say. I have a feeling that he's going to find a way to to stop the brawling Brolly.

You write well enough without a beta. From what I have seen since the beginning of this story, you have gotten better.If people complain about your grammar and such, then say: "You want to be my beta? No? Then shut the hell up." >XD But seriously. I see that you are trying but don't kill yourself over it. And if people don't like how you write then they can click the back button.

But yes, I do like this story and hope that you continue it. Don't give up, yet! This is pretty much one of the only DBZ stories that I look out for anymore. I've seen some badly written stuff and this is NOT badly written at all. I only read decent written stuff with a plot and obviously yours is just that, so keep striving on. ^^

I, sorry your having trouble with this story. I think it is fine the way it is.