rate_review Reviews

Well thought out and the story concept is alright, but it is badly written. There are grammar issues and glaring context issues that make many sentences nonsensical. Maybe worth reading if you are patient enough to try to puzzle out what has been written, but it looks like there hasn't even been a proof-reading (or proof-publish-reading) by the author.

*sigh* Yet another unfinished fic that I find tolerable. Why is it that all the worst written fics are updated all the time, while everything readable always remains unfinished? And of course, it just had to end to end on a cliffhanger. Although, I have a feeling the mysterious person who interupted them is Nail.

OH MAN! I re-read this, and am deeply saddened that you haven't updated this in such a long time!!! ;c I hope to hind this updated soon.
LATER. ROGUEFURY

Ok, ok. I can't believe I'm here reviewing this. But you say we should let you know if there should be more chapters and I'm forced to admit that would be a fantastic thing. You really do seem to write quite well- that's almost unseen in lemons o_O and you know how to build up anticipation and drama and be both sexy and really creepy but understandably in the character (if you take in their sittuations. The child of Kattatsu would have had quite some interesting issues if he grew up with that inside him)

So how do we find out about new chapters again?

I lovw Piccolo and would love to see some more to this story! Please comtinue??

i like it. I would also like a plot but with some good lemons.

delicious

I stil lread your stories. pic is is my boyfriend.

PLEASE CONTINUE THIS STORY!! I LOVE IT!

hey hurry up and update soon. it\'s really good. but wut\'s the girls name? is she like chichi or sumthing like that? andhey hey gonna fuck or wut? i mean come oey\'ey\'re having all these daydreams about each other! so hurry up. it\'s really good. ja ne