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Spite My Face	By : WithoutAWord Category: Fullmetal Alchemist > General Views: 784 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Spite My Face
- 1
Spite My Face

A/n:

I hope I don�t disappoint the die-hard FMA fans in the house��.. Sorry my babes, but I do kinda have artistic license (waves it manically in the air as a shield)� And if push comes to shove, just think of this as an AU� I don�t know actual ages or things for the Sins, so, sorry about it.. I realize that the age I have for Envy is incorrect right now, but, well, it matches the storyline� I�ll look it up some day, I promise.

Warnings:

There is, perhaps, a little bit of cussing� And a little bit of (though mentioned, never written) scenes of some things suggested (I. E. killing, sex, abuse, etc.,) Please be careful if you�re gonna read this.. Also, this isn�t true canon�

When I was alive� well, when I was human, everything was much different than it is now. I had never understood why the man I call �father� ignored me. My mother was no better. She wanted nothing to do with me and I was raised with a distracted father and distant mother. She was not a weak woman, yet she hated looking at me because I strove to be just like him.

I only remembered him, in my younger days, as distracted and busy. He was always busy. He was always in his office, pouring over writings and Alchemy books. And he would disappear every now and then for stretches of time. My mother would lock herself in her room for hours when this happened, and would refuse my pleas to come out.

And then it happened. Well into my teens, I knew my father and mother never married; I had always known this, feeling it didn�t matter in the least as much as everyone in those days made a fuss about it. But on one of his absences he was a very busy bee. He married another woman.

Mother was not happy with this news�

I, personally, could care less who he spent his time with, as I did not exactly like my mother either, and could not blame him for finding someone else�

Then, a couple years down the road, good news was announced to my ever-displeased mother and me�

He was going to have another child.

I was, at first, excited over this. Please note the �at first� part in this sentence.

I mean, who wouldn�t want to be the eldest brother, or to finally have a sibling? I hadn�t realized that this would signal the ending of my mothers� and my usage to him.

I realized this not an hour after the �good� news.

I watched, in slowly dawning realization as he packed up all his things after the news and left. Without saying goodbye. I stared after his slowly retreating buggy, thinking, �This is a mistake. He�s not leaving for good.�

Damn, was I a gullible bastard-child, or what?

Yet, I couldn�t lie to myself after months of waiting, of watching the roads everyday, when he did not return. My mother wasted away, locked in her room, and she grew to hate me, because I reminded her too much of him. I hated my figure; my body; my looks. I grew to hate that woman he had found. Grew to hate the unknown sibling I had.

I grew envious�

Haha, how clich�

Mother� well, she had become slightly (alright, considerably) mad, where she seemed to be able to close herself off from the outside world in her manor house, in her forest, soon after my twentieth birthday� Lucky bitch that she was.

I went to search for father soon afterwards. I wanted to see for my own eyes who and what actually captured his attentions so well that he was willing to drop us like hot potatoes. After months of travel I came to find him in a town south of Central. He was on his own. Apparently he was just as inclined to leave his new family just as much as his old family.

He was studying things called homunculi.

I tell you, I unconsciously knew my life would be royally fucked over all his research when he actually asked me to help aide him in his research.

Me, being the fucked up, naïve boy, just-turned-legal person that I was, I agreed, with a little bit of hope that maybe, if I showed a sort of interest in his interests, he would actually come back, or treat me more like a son than an acquaintance.

What a laughingstock I was!

Soon, we were knee-deep into the studies of homunculi, regeneration, immortality, and the Philosophers Stone. That�s what got me hooked. This mythical stone that was the key to my father�s affection. It was then that I learned of my father�s true nature. It seems he�s lived quite the extended life�

And it wasn�t the first time he�s attempted to create a Philosophers Stone, or a homunculus. That�s when I learned my true purpose for Father asking me for my help. Though it wasn�t exactly with my free-will or choice, I became his test subject.

It was the beginning of a beautiful hate/hate relationship�

Hate on both my parts, not his part�

He just saw a test subject, after all�

I�m not exactly sure what happened those last few months, but four months after me becoming a guinea pig I came out of whatever daze I was in and realized I wasn�t particularly human anymore. That�s when Father shoved some kind of red candy rocks at me, and told, not ask, told me to eat them. Never one to ignore politeness in its uncut form (please notice my sarcasm here), I ate them.

Damn were they good�

Until he opened his big trap and said something about them being made from human sacrifices�

Chucking back up the candy was never so hard to do.

Now, recall that this was well before anything was happening� the Eastern Rebellion would not happen for a couple more years� I would not meet Wrath, Pride, Lust and the others for quite a while� Although, it wasn�t a day later, after my failed attempt to chuck up the incomplete Stones, and two attempts (botched and unsuccessful as well, sadly) at killing myself (damn it, I just wouldn�t die!!), I met Greed�

There�s some company for ya�. The insanely fucked up type, at least�

It was from this (**cough cough**insane**cough cough**) wizened in age homunculus that I was err� initiated into my father�s attempt to create a complete Philosophers Stone and become truly immortal (according to him anyways�)�. Now this induction wasn�t some nutter reading from a secret society book, flogging me ten times, then clapping me on the back and welcoming my into the �cult.�

Nope. Those assholes who think that�s bad don�t even want to think of trying to become one of the Seven Deadly Sins� Well, lets just say, bondage and Greed do not go well in sentences near me, alright?

Well, after completely destroying my care, love, devotion, and trust in him, I no longer had reason to want anything to do with my father. Greed, also kind of broke off my interest in becoming a homunculus, until, of course, I learned of my special powers� While he is the �Ultimate Shield� I consider myself the �Ultimate Abomination.�

Nice ring to it, eh? Aw, good times, those.. Good times.

Well, I then became �Envy,� dropping any and all attachments (not of my own free will again, yet I really had no one anyways.) of my previous life�

Well, to make a long, long story short, Greed became more, er, interested in his wants and needs, not his creators� (Father) wants and needs� Well, safe to say, he was imprisoned and I soon met all my other pals and �siblings��

Yeah, being related to a bitchy-bossy woman that could literally �nail� you, a stick-so-far-up-my-ass man with a split-personality between serious and psychedelically cheerful, and an obtuse fat guy that stares blankly at everything and only cares about one thing (food) has been the highlight to my err� life�

Like it wasn�t good enough to be related to a mental woman and a man with a god-complex.. Sheesh!

Then something interesting happened. I got the chance to meet three special people in my father�s life.

Well, I never liked to look a gift-horse in the mouth before my change, why start now? (good question, eh?).

Of course I went to their house in a different form, after I was able to control my powers. Damn was I shocked.

Edward. He was still a baby at the time, and had our fathers� looks. I pitied him then. I then looked at Alphonse. He was the luckier one, looking much more like their mother, even if he was still young. Trisha Elric was a kind lady, who knew that her husband was not faithful, yet opened her arms to him every time he returned. I came as an unsuspecting assistant to Father. He wasn�t happy I was hiding my true form, but by then he didn�t care, as long as I followed his rules and did as he said. He was cold and distant to the boys, and sort of aloof towards Trisha. I realized that Father was doing the same thing he had done to my mother and me.

But they, at least, had their mother.

Sane too�(please feel my eyes roll�)

We stayed a week. I stayed with the younger boys, and I slowly came to accept them and not hate them. I was not jealous of them anymore. I hit it off with Edward the best, since he actually had more perception than his younger brother at that time.

I mean this literally too, because I mean, a newborn isn�t exactly the most perceptive of humans, now is it?

He (Ed, that is) almost seemed starved for our Father�s attentions, and I notice he spent a lot of time sneaking glances towards Father�s study, but I would distract him and he would almost forget. But I could see the slowly dawning resentment he had towards Father, the same as me.

If only I could see what was about to happen� Damn am I blind or what? Homunculus must lose their eyesight when becoming so� superiorly perfect�

We left afterwards, and it was the last time I saw Trisha Elric.

Alive in the sense of mortal, anyways.

Let me tell you, Sloth is nothing like her�

Well, by then Father was so obsessed with the Stone that I had to turn my back on my half-brothers. I wish I never did that. In doing so, I assured their fall from grace and their downhill spiral. I noticed a letter or two from the boys, but Father ignored them. Then the letters stopped.

Sloth came after that, sort of a secretary and messenger to all of us older Sins in her detached way.

I still had part of my soul; that�s why I was aware of Father being my father and such. I was also still alive when Father turned me into a homunculus. Sloth doesn�t have a soul, and this is why I believe she doesn�t seem to remember Father.

Lucky bitch�

Well, then we started getting news, and low and behold, who should appear on the map again, and slowly draw attention from Father to themselves? Why my idiot half-brothers! Lust was the first one to meet them, and she came back looking at me oddly. I didn�t understand then why.

Then it was my turn to meet them, in disguise again of course. But by then I had had my favorite form of a young, healthy, pale man with long dark green hair.

Ed reminded me well too much of Father for my tastes.

I hated him then.

I could not forgive him for turning out more like father than he should have, without him around for most of his life, not counting the few years before dropping them like a rotten potato. I wished for him to stay unlike him, but I guess he couldn�t help having the same blood in his veins� I punished him for it all the same.

I guess you could say that but punishing him, I was punishing myself for the same reason: being related to the bastard that ruined my life, as well as my half brothers. I was spiting myself by them�

And yet, I cannot seem to forget, that one week� Where we three played, and I was almost normal again� Almost.. Human again.

But times like those aren�t meant to last.

And I guess I can�t help trying to spite myself by them, since I keep my well-known secret from everyone, except from Father, for he already knows.

The truth is, I�ve never forgotten my true form, not matter how much I claim that.

Thems the breaks, I guess�

For my true form is what makes me hide it, day after day. I had his dark blonde hair and golden eyes. I had my mothers skin tone, mouth, and ears, but my father�s chin, nose, and cheekbones. I have his blood in my veins; yet, the best I can do is hide it in my disguises.

Alphonse has no worries, once looking a lot like his mother, and then getting turned into a tin can�

Edward, on the other hand� He has the same problem as me� And he can�t hide that fault, like I can. And every time I fight with him, or hurt him, or anger him, its like I�m battling myself�

Father�

It�s like I�m spiting my face� by injuring him�

And that�s all the reason I need.

End��

AFTER A/n:

The truth is, this really didn�t come out the way I had actually planned it in the beginning� It went through a title change as well. And the story is not the actual one I wanted, but I guess I should just be happy, eh? I hope everyone liked this�. Despite the horrible mixing of information, truth and such, and the distorting of information.. I mixed up a lot of things, and I think the story is just a huge mess, but I said I�d do a story about Envy�

I hope you all enjoyed it!
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Spite My Face