The Dark and Light side of Love

WARNINGS: Angst, lime, and language. Oooo. Lime’s a new one. Yay!

Zofo – I’m glad you reviewed! I was beginning to worry. You’re the only one that reviews my stories anymore. :( I’m sorry about your pc. I wouldn’t know what I’d do if mine died. I’d probably lose my mind or go into a deep depression, but that’s awesome that you can use your PS3! I didn’t know you could use it like that. I’m happy that you liked the chapter with Haru’s past. I was wondering if I got a little carried away with him or not. I was also unsure about the ending too, with Vegeta, but you liked it either way so I guess I shouldn’t be complaining. For the Shadow Vegeta plushie, you’re welcome. ^^ I should seriously consider making an image of him. I just need to find the time to do it, and the mood. Also, thank you for reviewing Confused Ecstasy. ^^ I must admit, I’m not too proud of that story, but maybe I can make another one that’ll be better, since I got two wonderful reviews on it so far. Yeah, I wonder if Haru will do that too. I really don’t know, I’m just making this up as I go along, sort of. Something tells me there might be another plot coming on. O.o

Kakarot’s POV

Alright. I’ve made up my mind. I must admit though, I’m not too proud of this choice, but it’s the only way I know that I can finally be with my love. I also admit to myself that I’m scared and ashamed. Scared that I’m actually going to go through with this as I make my way towards his hideout in the setting sun. Ashamed that…that I’m letting my people down, that I’m leaving them for my own selfish reasons. Though, father will be with them, he’s a good leader, but then again, who will take his place when he’s gone? Our people will have to survive without a leader. I can’t believe I’m making a choice that will have severe consequences, but I also can’t believe that I’ve lived without my love for so long. Either way, one of us has to make the decision and I know how scared he is of what I am, of what my life consists. That doesn’t change the fact that I’m also scared of what his life consists. Wait. Is that what he would call it? His life? He’s not exactly living, is he? Oh well. I’m leaving it at that, since I have no other word for it.

It was pretty easy sneaking out of my room when I did. I just jumped the balcony and off I went. Though, I didn’t make the choice that I’ve made just before I made my escape. I’ve actually been thinking about it for awhile now, maybe longer. I’ve always wondered about the life of a Shadow, I just never thought I would make the decision to join them. I shivered as I thought about it. I thought about my love, of how cold and practically emotionless he is. I wonder, will I be like him? Will my personality be completely erased and be replace with coldness and…a dead heart? I shook my head. Don’t think about it too much, otherwise you’ll change your mind.

I thought of something else. How did I ever fall in love with someone like him? I though back to the first day I met him. He was showing emotion when I first saw him. His red tears streaked his face and he tried putting up a front by hiding his sadness. I’ve always admired his bravery, but it made me proud and sad when he would try to be strong in the worst of moments, but it caused him to push me away. I know he’s strong, but no one’s that strong. Not to mention he’s dead gorgeous. How can anyone not fall in love with him? He’s powerful, proud, beautiful, and his ego has no equal.

I sighed as I stopped running as I was at my destination. My death. A shiver wracked my frame again. Will I ever be able to shiver again? What about the other things of…being alive? Okay, Kakarot. Stop thinking about it and just…just…walk in. It’s that simple. Just go inside. I can’t move. I’m freaking out so bad I’m frozen! Shit. Now I’m starting to have second thoughts. But it has to be done! One of us has to make the decision! It might as well be me. I took another look at the last rays of the sun that I’ll probably never see again before I made my way towards the entrance of the hideout.

No wonder we spot it so easily. It’s above ground and it’s huge! This is the worst hideout yet. Maybe Vegeta is losing his touch on his survival instincts. What a time to be losing that. As I stopped in front of the huge door and moved to open it, it opened on its own, and then I came face to face with the man I came here to be with forever.

We both froze, surprised to see one another, even though I was expecting to see him. “Kakarot?” he greeted me with a surprised tone.

I looked away as I knew I would have to tell him the reason why I’m here. “Can I talk to you?” I looked back up at the men that stood suspiciously behind him. “Alone?”

He stood speechless for a few moments before he found the will to speak. “Uh, sure.” He answered quietly and turned toward his men, “Men! Wait here until I come back!”

He was about to walk toward me when one of his men spoke up, “But sire! What if it’s a trick? You shouldn’t be left alone with a Light! Especially their King!”

“He’s right my King!” The man standing next to him quickly added. I believe it was his loyal guard. I instantly had this powerful urge to kill him.

Vegeta stopped, but didn’t turn toward his men. Instead, he looked at me, “You’re right. It could be a trick. Though, don’t you all find it odd that he came alone? If he was looking for a victory, don’t you think he should’ve brought an army with him?” He finished his cocky suspicions with a smirk.

I smirked back. He’s too smart for his own good.

All the men talked amongst each other until the person I recently loathed more than anything spoke, “If you are so sure of this my King, then we shall leave you be. Come on men! Our hunt will have to wait.” I swear he purrs his title. I clenched my fists.

My love saw my discomfort and walked up to me to caress my cheek as everyone left. “What is it, my love? Something must be on your mind if you came right up to death’s door all alone.” He talks to me in a worried tone.

I hold him closer to me by wrapping my arms around his waist and rest my head on his shoulder. “I came to be with you.” I answered him in a quiet tone.

He stroked my hair with his cold hands, “Here, let us go somewhere more private.” He eased back a little so I would let go of him, regrettably, and he grabbed my hand then took off running with me, away from his hideout.

We stopped at a cliff with a wonderful view of a canyon and a river that is faintly heard at the bottom. The view of the sky is greatly wondrous and beautiful. The sun has set already and the stars were faintly coming into view of the black void of the sky, along with the crescent shape of the pale moon. I turned to my love and stroked his hair and face, “It’s beautiful.” I said in a way to make it seem like he is too, also beautiful.

He smiled sweetly in return and held my hand to his cold face. “I come here whenever I need time to myself or when I need to think. So, I come here a lot.” He closed his eyes to feel the warmth of my hand.

I smile at how he reacts to me so much. I rest my other hand on his waist and stroke him there. He rests his hand on mine and tips his head back a little, eyes still closed. I’m a little surprised at how much he trusts me. I step closer to him and gently kissed his neck. He froze for a moment, then opened his eyes and leaned his head forward ‘til his cold lips were right up to my heated ones.

“Are you sure you didn’t come here to turn me?” He asked slyly.

I kissed him sensually and he moaned. I took that to my advantage and delved my tongue into the coldness of his mouth and his icy tongue met with mine. His fingers once again twined into my hair to keep me in place. He leaned more into me as the kiss deepened and I held him there, not wanting to ever let him go. He tried pulling back, but I didn’t let him and kissed him a bit longer until I had to come out for air.

“You haven’t answered my question yet.” He leaned towards me again, but waited until I got air back into my lungs.

I hugged him closer to me so his still, cold chest rested against my panting one. “What was it again? Sorry, I can’t remember.” I gave him a sheepish grin.

He looked at me a little annoyed, but repeated it anyways. “Did you come here to turn me?” he asked more sadly.

I answered him with a sad face of my own. “No. I told you. I came here to be with you…forever.” I hesitated on the last word.

He stiffened and moved out of my grasp. A look of shock was on his usually expressionless face, “W-What?”

I was confused. “Isn’t that what you want? For me to be with you forever? For me to be what you are?” I tried moving towards him with my arms open for him, but he backed away shaking his head.

“No, Kakarot. I don’t want you to be like me. I would love more than anything to be with you, but not like that. Not like that.” He kept shaking his head.

I stopped my advance towards him and my arms fell to my sides. “Then what do you want?”

He stopped too, the red tears in his eyes threatening to fall. “I don’t know Kakarot. I don’t want you to be cold and lifeless like me. I want you warm and alive. I want to keep you the way you are.” He held back his tears.

“What are you trying to say? You want to…be like me?”

He snapped. “I don’t know! I’m…I’m a-afraid, Kakarot. I’m afraid!” His tears fell. “I’m afraid of the light you walk in, I’m afraid of what you are! I don’t know why I am, but I am! It’s different than what I’m used to living in, I’m afraid of what it’ll do to me!” He kept backing up until his back hit an outcropping of a rock. “But…but…I want to be with you, Kakarot. Without you, I feel like my life has no meaning and I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. I’m the leader of a race I despise! This was what my father wanted! He wanted me to take over and he wanted me to be a Shadow for as long as I lived!” He’s practically in hysterics now. I hate making him cry, let alone seeing him cry. My eyes tear up watching him battle with himself. I try to move to comfort him, but he moves away from me. He sits a while and calms down a bit. “Now, I think it’s time, that I quit living the way that bastard has wanted me to live, and do what I think is best for me…what is best…for both of us.” He stood up then and slowly walked over to me, tears still streaming down his face.

His steps are unsure and unsteady, his lustrous tail was showing many signs of discomfort, but he walks up to me and kisses me deeply. I kiss him back and quickly wrap my arms around him. I rub his back and try comforting him, when he pulled back slowly. “I’ll…I’ll j-join you Kakarot. I’m all yours.” He closed his eyes, as if in defeat.

I hug him tightly to me and whisper, “You know Vegeta, when I first saw your eyes again after 7 long years, I thought there was no emotion left in you. You looked dead inside. But when I saw you cry, I knew there was a chance. I knew that the Vegeta I knew was still in there. I knew I could still have you because your tears proved to me that there was still emotion left in you, still life.” I leaned back to look at him. More tears streamed down his face and mine fell in response. I lifted his chin to get his attention; he opened his eyes and looked at me desperately. “You’re very brave Vegeta. I love you so much for doing this. You have no idea how much this means to me.” I dry his tears with my thumb and hiss him briefly.

“Do you want to come back with me or do you want me to do it now? Or wait?” I didn’t want to rush him into it, but I was so anxious, I had to know.

I knew then I probably shouldn’t have asked him. He looked worried, “Uh…well, I don’t want all that attention before it happens, but…I don’t know if I want to do it now, or wait.” He paused. “Do it now, while I’m still brave.”

I looked at him, unsure, while I stroked his hair. “Are you sure?”

He gripped my arms and answered me in a more anxious voice. “Yes! Do it before I panic and change my mind!”

I nodded. I leaned my head towards his neck about to drink his blood, already wondering what it tastes like, until he stopped me. “Wait!” I stopped and pulled back. “What’ll happen when you do turn me? Give me a rundown real quick so I know what’s going to happen.”

“I don’t know, love. It might make you change your mind…”

“Just tell me!” he was panicking.

“Okay, calm down.” I rubbed his arms soothingly. I started once he calmed down a bit. “At first you’ll be very weak,” he grimaced, “and you’ll have a slight fever.” His expression became one of shock. I imagine the thought of feeling heat for the first time ever would be pretty shocking too. “You’ll be very weak because you won’t have much blood in you except mine.” He settled a bit. “The fever is a sign that you’re getting heat into your body. I’ll have to feed you my ki to keep you warm.” He purred at the mention of warmth. I smiled sadly, “then the fever will get to the point where…you think you’re dying, but its normal. The fever assures us that you body is coming to life and the blood is trying to circulate throughout your body. You’ll be living on my blood at first, but when the fever gets more intense, you’ll have to drink…Shadows blood.” He didn’t react at all when I said that. “After drinking that for a while, you’ll be getting a slight ache in your stomach. That tells you that you’re ready for food.”

“Food?” he interrupted.

“Yes, love, food. It’ll give you strength.” I explained.

“But I thought the blood will give me strength.” He retorted.

“No, but you don’t have to drink it all the time either, like Shadows do. You only drink it whenever your throat burns of thirst. You know the feeling, right?”

He nodded. “So, why do I need the blood?”

“Because it’ll help you get your ki back.”

He gave me a confused look. “Then why do I need food then? Isn’t the blood all I need?”

I shook my head. “No, love. Your body can’t live on ki alone. It needs the strength to move. Ki just gives you power. You’ve always drank blood because that’s all your body really needs. You can’t consume food because your body isn’t functioned to digest it and make it into energy.”

“Oh. So, what should I really worry about the transformation?” he looked at me more understandingly.

“Actually, you shouldn’t worry. Let me do the worrying, okay? I’m the one who’s looking after you. Also, please understand that I’ll do everything in my power to give you as much comfort as possible. The pain is unbearable, I’m sorry to say, but I want you to know.” I stroked his hair as I explained this.

He looked at me more worriedly, but nodded. “Okay. You promise not to leave me during the transformation?”

“Yes. Of course I won’t leave you. There’s a lot of Lights who would love to get their revenge on you.” I stroked his cheek and wrapped a reassuring arm around him.

“Alright. Well, I think that’s all the questions I have now.” He pulled back a little. “My fate is in your hands now, my love.”

I smiled. “I’m surprised of how much trust you have in me.”

He smiled back. “Of course. You’re the man I’m going to be with for the rest of my life. I have to start trusting you sometime.”

I laughed. “Alright, are you ready?”

He hesitated, then nodded. He wrapped his arms around my neck and started to pull me down towards his cold, smooth neck, when a thought suddenly occurred to me.

“Wait.” I stopped and pulled my head up to look at the sky. “It’s dark. I wouldn’t have enough energy to bring us back to our hideout, let alone lend you any of my blood. You’ll die if I don’t bring you back in time. I’m sorry love, but it looks like you’re going to have to wait.”

He groaned. “Damn it! They’ll probably lock me up and tie me down! I don’t want that sort of attention, Kakarot!”

“Hey! No one’s going to do that to you, alright? I won’t let them.” I held him close as I said this.

“Damn! And all that suspense! You killed it Kakarot! If my heart was working, I would be hyperventilating by now!” he moved out of my arms to cross his over his chest. “Then by the time we get there, I’ll probably panic and try to find a way to escape.”

“It’ll be alright, I promise.” Then something he said suddenly sunk in. “Wait…how do you even know what hyperventilating is, if you don’t have a working heart?”

He gave me a look that was clearly saying, ‘you’re such an idiot.’ “Because of all the Lights that I’ve interrogated and killed, I’ve learned some of their reactions. Obviously.” He ended sarcastically.

I blushed at my naiveness and changed the subject. “Look, I’m sorry that you built up your courage for nothing, but, now you can use it to come with me.” He didn’t look at me. “Or you can lend me some of your blood anyways so we can get back?” It was more of a question than a suggestion.

He turned towards me. “Are you serious? You’ll just lose more of your power on our way over there, and then you’ll have to drink more!”

I stared at him. “So…are you saying…you want to carry me?” I asked innocently.

He gave me one of his glares that make my heart flutter, for some reason. “I guess I’m going to have to. Come on.” He signaled for me to get on his back.

“Not when you’re going to be stingy the whole way.” I crossed my arms and pouted while he growled in impatience. “That’s it. Come here.”

He didn’t respond for a while. I was wondering if he was going to be stubborn for a moment, then he complied and stomped over to me. I pulled him close and leaned my head down for the third time towards the same spot where I was going to bite him before, and kissed him tenderly there. Then, I gradually started to lick and suck at the same spot. He moaned in response and tangled his fingers in my hair again. After a couple more licks, I pulled back, leaving a red circle in place. He moans in loss of my warm mouth on him, but he allows it.

“There. Are you happy now?” I run my thumb over the new mark.

After a moment, he looks away and answers, “A little.”

I look at him, a little disappointed in his answer. “Well, it’s better than nothing. Now, I guess we should get going.” I try to fly, but nothing happens. I sighed, “right.”

“Here.” Vegeta faces his back to me and waits.

I come up behind him and wrap my arms around his waist and kiss his new mark. He stiffens, but continues with the task at hand. He levitates in the air and we take off toward our hideout.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There. That ending wasn’t so bad. Though, I was debating whether or not if I should continue on with this chapter. I’m sorry if I kept killing the suspense in this chapter, even Vegeta was throwing a fit. *giggles* Don’t worry, it’ll happen in the next chapter. Even though I was pretty sure it was going to happen in this chapter, but…logic took a hold of me and I had to postpone it. So, you’re not the only ones who are disappointed! Hey, I could’ve always made it worse. I was actually planning on having Haru come in and break it up, but, since there were so many interruptions already, I thought I’d show some mercy and move on. Well, the next chapter’s up already. Yeah, even I couldn’t wait any longer. ^^;