Insanity

Chapter 11


\"It\'s kind of difficult to explain Heero... I mean, there\'re parts that I don\'t know if were a dream or reality\"

Heero embraced his lover tighter.

\"Just tell me the most you can tell me, or what you remember the best\"

Duo thought for a while before answering. The thing he could remember the best was when he was in coma, or at least that\'s what he thought. He wasn\'t that sure because the image were kind of mixed, so he decided to left everything it has to do with the \'dream\' out of the explanation, at least for now.

\"Heero, when I was in coma I could hear you and Quatre too... but I couldn\'t answer you. I kept seeing things I didn\'t want to see and I was feeling more and more desperate because I wanted to see you and talk to you and it was impossible...\"

Duo fell silent, but Heero said nothing; he knew his lover would need his time to talk about that and he wouldn\'t push him. He would wait until Duo felt well enough to tell him.

\"Heero, something happened there and I don\'t know if you\'ll understand, but you must know\"

Heero didn\'t understand, so he just raised and eyebrow and waited for Duo to explain.

\"Heero, you know I don\'t lie. Do you trust in me enough to believe whatever I say? No matter how weird or impossible it may seems?\"

\"I know Duo and I do trust you\"

Duo sighed and then took one of Heero\'s hands in his.

\"Heeroen Ien I said I was Shinigami I never lied... I AM Shinigami, the god of death lives inside me and when I was in coma I talked to him. I know it sounds crazy but I can assure you is completely true... I can even prove it. When... when I was there he talked to me, he said that in order for me to wake up I had to find myself... I did, but in the process I saw things I wasn\'t supposed to see or know at all\"

\"Duo I must admit I don\'t understand\"

\"Promise me something Heero?\"

Dookeooked at the Prussian-blue eyes of his lover and the pilot of Wing could see ther onr on Duo\'s eyes.

\"Whatever you want Duo\"

\"Please promise me that no matter what I say you won\'t get mad at me or resent me\"

\"There\'s no way I could resent you and even if I get mad at you it doesn\'t mean I\'ll stop loving you Duo\"

\"Heero...\"

Duo now had some tears in his eyes, he blinked once and they rolled down his face. Heero raised his free hand and cleaned them softly.

\"I-I saw scenes from my past; there were some I remembered but then I started to see things I had never lived. I discovered why I had survived while all of my friends died. Solo... he somehow got a vaccine and instead of using it himself he gave it to me... He-he told me it was a shot of vitamins... He gave his life for mine... He loved me and he died not knowing that I had loved him too...\"

Duo was crying openly now and Heero couldn\'t resist that, he embraced his lover tightly in his arms.

\"Then I \'saw\' father Maxwell and Sister Helen talking about me, they said I was important for the future... they said beautiful things about me... I miss them\"

\"Duo... you don\'t have to do this, it\'s ok I\'m sorry for asking you-\"

\"No Heero... I actually needed to do this\"

Duo kissed him softly and rested his head on Heero\'s shoulder.

\"Then I \'saw\' you and Trowa, you two were inside an Oz cell. He asked you if you missed me...\"

Heero tensed, he knew what Duo was talking about.

\"I remember that time Duo, and I\'m sure I never told you about it and that there\'s no way Trowa would have told you...\"

\"That\'s why I said this was weird... It was Shinigami who showed me that... he just wanted to help me...\"

Heero kissed him in his forehead.

\"After that I \'saw\' Wufei and Quatre... He told Wufei about my dream of living here in earth after the war was over. He said I had taught him a lot of things... Wufei said the same and... he said he.. respected me. Heero that\'s the last thing I would think Wufei would think of me! I mean... I thought he kind of hated me... you know\"

\"Duo, I think Wufei actually likes those pranks you play on him and the rest of us... it kind of make our lives less hard to bear\"

Duo tightened his embrace.

\"I guess so... Heero, what I \'saw\' after that was something I\'m sure you never wanted me to know. Please understand that I didn\'t do it on purpose. wou would never betray your trust and would never look into your things without your permission\"

Heero raised an eyebrow.

\"What do you mean Duo? What did you see?\"

\"After Wufei and Quatre the scene changed and I was at one of our safe houses, one of those time I was trying to get to you. You hit me so hard I fainted... I always thought it was Trowa or maybe Wufei the ones who took me back to my room... but I discovered it was you... I saw you taking care of me and when you were sure I was ok you left...\"

Heero opened his eyes wide; he just put two and two together and understood why Duo told him what he had told to him.

\"Duo did you-\"

\"I did Heero... I\'m sorry. But I only saw three entries. The first one was the one you wrote that same night. You wanted J to re-train you... I\'m sure you still remember what you wrote that night... The next one was when you had finally accepted you loved me; you wrote about Wufei\'s visits to Treize and Zechs... J declined you petition. You said you were worried for me when you sent me to a mission\"

Duo stopped to take some tissues from the night table and cleaned his nose and face.

\"The last entry was after the \'incident\' with Relena... It was then that I understood more or less what had happened... Heero, I swear I never read you journal. I would never do that, I actually didn\'t know you had one, when I saw those scenes I told myself to ask you about it and that I would let you read mine if you wanted to... I-\"

Heero smiled and caressed Duo\'s head softly.

\"Shhh... it\'s ok Duo. I trust you... I don\'t understand completely this thing about you being Shinigami, but you can be sure I would never leave you ok? And it\'s ok if you don\'t want to talk about your dream right now, I\'ll wait until you feel you\'re ready to tell me...\"

Duo kissed Heero hardly and then rested his head once again on hoverover\'s shoulder. Heero just embraced him tighter and made them both lay back on the bed.

* * *

Quatre and Trowa had already woken up and they were finishing their breakfasts. Rashid had called him earlier and said the Maguanacs were ready and he just had to tell him when they would have to leave. Quatre told him to take all the Maguanacs to Howard\'s base; it was kind of risky because the amount of MS was big and such movement of \'troops\' could be detected by Oz. Anyway, it wasisk isk they had to take.

\"I\'m nervous Trowa... I have this feeling that something bad is going to happen... I\'m scared that one of us may die in the battle field\"

Trowa took the blonde\'s hand and caressed it softly.

\"I know little one... I hope we can make it without downs but we all know the risks of this mission, and we already accepted it...\"

\"I know that, but still. Trowa please be careful I don\'t want to lose you or any of the guys for that matter... not even Treize or Zechs\"

Trowa stood up from his chair in front of Quatre and surrounded the table to take the blonde Arabian in his arms.

\"You\'ll see how everything will be ok, besides you will be commanding the attack and we all know how good you\'re at it. There\'s no way we\'ll fail if you and Heero lead our attack\"

\"Thank you... I promise I won\'t disappoint you\"

Trowa smiled softly and kissed his lover gently. They rapidly washed the few things they had used for breakfast and then went to get their things and leave towards Howard\'s base as soon as they couldatreatre was about to turn off his laptop when it beeped signaling that a new mail had just arrived; the blonde arched an eyebrow and opened the mail.

From: nataku_justice@freedom.org
To: deserts_sands@freedom.org
Subject: (none)
Date: Thu, 12 Nov. 195 AC 09:30:15

We\'ll meet at Howard\'s base, they\'re coming with me too. You don\'t need to get worried about being detected, that has been taken care of already. We\'ll be there in two hours counting the hour the mail was sent.

\"We have an hour and a half then to be there in time with them. Lets go\"

With that Quatre turned off the laptop and shoved it in his backpack. They took the rest of their things and dashed out of the house as fast as they could.

* * *

Heero was checking Wing while Duo did the same with Deathscythe. They knew that in any moment the other five would be arriving. Heero climbed down from Wing to walk towards the black gundam that was next to his own.

\"Duo! I finished with my checking I\'m going to take a bath, please tell me if they arrive while I\'m in it ok?!\"

Duo appeared from the inside of Deathscythe\'s cockpit and smiled at Heero.

\"Ok, and please take my things and leave them in the bathroom. I\'ll take a shower too!\"

Heero nodded and left. Duo got inside his gundam once again to keep checking the controls and all the systems. All the Maguanacs had already arrived and as soon as the rest got there they would be leaving towards space. He looked at his watch and it said it was 11:15 a.m.

\"Fifteen minutes... good\"

He finished with his gundam and rapidly climbed down, cleaning his hands with an already dirty cloth he walked towards Howard and Dr J. were standing in front of Heavyarms.

\"Hey! Howard! I\'m going to take a bath... please tell me when they arrive ok? I think Trowa and Quatre will be here first\"

The old man with the Hawaiian stile shirt turned towards him and smiled.

\"Ok Duo, and please try to not take too long in the shower ok!\"

Duo smiled and some color graced his cheeks. Howard knew him just too well. The longhaired boy turned and ran towards the door that led to the dorms of the base, while both men looked at him.

\"What are you thinking about J?\"

Howard had seen the look of mild concern of the doctor. But J didn\'t answer him, he just turned his head towards the gundam in front of him and kept checking it. Howard just shook his head and went to where the other scientists were.

* * *

\"There! I see it\"

Trowa opened his eyes and saw the base just in front of them. They heard a beep on his radar and noticed that there was another plane behind them.

\"That must be Wufei\"

They opened the lines and called the base to announce their arrival. Quatre had taken the autopilot off and had his hands over the controls. The landing was as soft as Trowa expected it to be, of the five of them Quatre was the best when it came to landing. Duo was the best pilot of them all but he tended to make jokes when it was time to land.

Quatre was driving the plane towards one of the hangars when Wufei landed the plane just a moment later. The five scientist were waiting for them to exit the planes while Howard had gone to tell Duo and obviously Heero that the others had already arrived.

\"Duo! I know I must be interrupting something but you told me to tell you when they arrived and they just did! Bye!\"

Duo was laughing softly, and Heero was frowning.

\"Come on Hee-chan... you knew there wasn\'t enough time\"

He leaned his head and kissed his lover softly on his lips, what he didn\'t expect was for Heero to grab him by his waist and kiss him hardly.

\"They can wait a little, besides they still have to check their gundams\"

Duo laughed and let his lover do whatever he wanted to do, not that he would complain.

~ Meanwhile in the hangars~

\"I don\'t want that thing in my gundam!!\"

\"Wufei please calm down...\"

The Chinese pilot turned to see at Quatre.

\"I won\'t calm down Winner! Not until those crazy old men take the system out of Nataku!\"

Master O came towards Wufei and grabbed him by his shoulder.

\"Wufei, I understand your fear of the system but we discussed it and we all thought it was better to install it\"

\"You don\'t understand! We don\'t know what the system will show me or how I\'ll react to it! I can\'t take the risk!\"

\"There\'s nothing you can do now. The system is already installed and we won\'t take it out. Besides we installed a control on Wing Zero to shut down the system if anything goes wrong... which I doubt\"

Wufei had his fist clenched but he knew he had lost the battle. He shook the hand of Master O off his shoulder and left the hangar more pissed off than ever; Quatre started to walk behind him but he was stopped by Treize and Zechs.

\"I think it\'s better if we just leave him alone, he has to deal with this by his own\"

\"I know but... Well, I\'m still worried\"

\"And that\'s completely understandable but you know how he is... He needs to be alone right now\"

Quatre sighed but didn\'t follow the pilot of Altron. He turned on his heel and went to where his own gundam was and to talk with Instructor H about Sandrock and the modifications he suffered. Trowa was doing the same with Dr. S and Treize and Zechs went to the plane they had arrived to take Epion and Tallgeese III out of it to be checked together with the other gundams.

Thirty minutes later Duo and Heero came to the hangars. Duo still had his hair wet but already in its usual braid, and judging by the smile on their faces they\'ve had a really nice bath. Duo waved towards the others pilots and then noticed the two Oz soldiers there.

\"Hey Zechsy, Wizard! How are you two?!\"

He was smiling and Heero, even when he kind of didn\'t like the way Duo was referring to Zechs, was glad that his lover was feeling well and happy.

\"I could live without the name but but I have this feeling you won\'t stop calling me that\"

\"Not in this life Zechsy... It\'s funny!\"

Duo winked an eye to the blonde and then looked at Treize.

\"How are you feeling Duo?\"

\"Very well Treize, kind of had one of those showers you can\'t live without, ne?\"

He said winking an eye. Treize laughed and looked towards Heero, who was becoming redder by the time.

\"I think Heero doesn\'t appreciate your comment Duo\"

Duo looked at his now very red lover and in less than a second he was at his side and hugging him like that was no tomorrow.

\"Come on Hee-chan! You don\'t need to feel embarrassed!\"

To emphasize his point he kissed the perfect soldier long and deeply and said soldier answered with the same amount of eagerness. When they parted for air they turned to look at the other two men, just to notice how they were trying to look anywhere but them.

\"One would say that you never saw two people kissing\"

Heero rolled his eyes and Zechs went to \'check\' Altron together with Treize.

\"Do they think we\'re idiots?\"

\"No, they just think you are one... baka\"

Duo punched Heero in the arm playfully.

\"But you love me anyway so stop complaining\"

Heero smiled and then took the longhaired pilot\'s hand in his and started pulling him towards the others were. Wufei was stoutsoutside and as was mentioned before Treize and Zechs went to se how he was doing. They approached the silent pilot and took seat at each side of him.

\"Dragon...\"

\"I want to be alone... if you don\'t mind\"

Treize sighed and took the Chinese boy\'s hand in his.

\"That\'s the problem... I do mind. Wufei we know how you feel, but we can\'t do anything against it\"

To Treize\'s surprise Wufei leaned towards him and made Zechs get close too; he had alwayved ved when both of his lovers embraced him because he felt secure, that nothing and no one would ever reach him and hurt him. Those two men had given him a place where he felt safe and the future battle scared him because he feared losing one of them.

\"Wufei?\"

\"Just... just stay here for a while please?\"

\"Dragon\"

Both men smiled sadly, but they embraced the boy and tight as they could without hurting him. From the doors of the hangars four boys were looking at the three outside embracing each other.

\"Hee-chan... if you see even the slightless change on Wufei\'s behavior please shut down his system\"

\"I will Duo, but once the system acted over the pilot, he will react according to what Zero showed him. Even if it\'s turned off\"

Duo hugged his boyfriend tight.

\"I see...\"

\"But I think he\'ll do fine Duo, don\'t worry\"

\"Thanks Quatre... but I\'m not only worried for Wufei... I don\'t know what will happen with me either. I mean, I used it just once and I definitely didn\'t like what I saw and felt\"

\"Duo...\"

Heero tightened the embrace and caressed Duo\'s back softly. Trowa took the blonde Arabian in his arms and embraced him too. They all knew that in a matter of minutes they would be heading towards space and to the worst battle of their lives; they would be saving the earth and the colonies, but that didn\'t assure the future peace. Peace was something that would have to be worked, there was still too much distrust between the colonies and the earth and they still needed a symbol to represent it. They knew that to keep peace they would have to keep an eternal watch; Relena wanted to destroy the gundams after the war ended, but her brother and the pilots knew that those would be their best symbol of peace.

\"Heero!\"

Dr. J walked towards them.

\"Dr J?\"

\"It\'s time Heero, you all should be going now\"

The Wing pilot nodded and motioned his lover to go and prepare his gundam; Heero then went outside and walked towards the other three pilots.

\"Treize... Ittimetime to go\"

With that he turned over his heel and left. Treize sighed and turned his head to his other two lovers; they were looking at him with serious faces, he knew then that they were more than ready to the battle they were going to have.

The gundams were being placed into the space ships and Heero had turned Wing Zero into its plane form and had the motors ready. Altron, Epyon and Tallgeese III were in one ship and Deathscythe Hell, Sandrock and Heavyarms were in the other. Duo jumped from Deathscythe and went to where Heero was.

\"Hee-chan, please be careful...\"

\"You too Duo. We\'ll met at Peacemillion; Sally told me before we left the hospital that she would go there and get everything ready to our arrival\"

Duo leaned over and kissed him softly. Heero embraced him ad deepened the kiss.

\"Ahem... Sorry to disturb you guys but the two ships are ready and waiting\"

\"Don\'t worry Quatre\"

\"Heero, you will be leading us. The Maguanacs will leave later, they are still a large amount of MS and there\'s the possibility of being detected. They\'ll join us just when the fight starts ok?\"

Heero nodded and with a last small kiss he jumped into Wing and closed the cabin. Duo waved at him and walked behind Quatre towards the ship his gundam was into. Once there the three pilots took their respective seats; Duo was in the controls of the ship and Trowa was the co-pilot, while Quatre took care of the com-links and radars. The blonde opened the com-links and communicated with the other ship and Heero\'s gundam.

\"We\'re ready Heero, you can go now\"

\"Roger, your ship will follow after me and Wufei will follow after you. Once into space we\'ll separate so if anything happens they can\'t shoot the three of us at the same time. The beam of the Libra is too powerful and I don\'t want to take risks, if you see they\'re going to shoot leave as fast as you can and let me deal with it. Wing is fast enough to avoid a shoot and they can\'t shoot more than once\"

\"Heero-\"

\"Don\'t worry Duo... I won\'t let them to touch even a single part of wing. I\'ll be ok\"

Duo didn\'t answer, but he still was scared. He heard Heero talking to Treize and heard that Lady Une had already sent the first troop out to space and they were heading towards Peacemillion and others would be getting in strategic spots around the colonies. Heero told him to call her once they were out and tell her to wait until further instruction, but to not send anymore troops.

Heero left and three minutes later Duo followed, two minutes later the last ship followed. They didn\'t talk between them anymore just to prevent to be heard by Quinze or Tubarov. They knew both of hem knew that it was thing of time before the gundams appeared.

* * *

\"Sally, they\'re coming\"

The doctor turned to see the woman besides her.

\"I know Noin. Get everything ready and prepare the space suits for them\"

The Taurus were ready and the troops Une had sent, that consisted mainly of Taurus too, had all their com-links open to any new order from Une or Treize. Almost all the men that Une had sent had been part of the Treize Faction and they were more than ready to do whatever the fearless leader of Oz told them to do. Contrary to what Heero had feared the Libra didn\'t attack. Heero changed Wing into its MS form and waited for the other two ships to arrive.

They took the gundams out of the ships and left them one next to the other, there was too the white Taurus Noin used. Duo had just reached the floor when Heero took him in his arms, one could say he was kind of off character, but after all that had happened to them he really didn\'t care anymore about showing his feelings for the braided pilot.

\"Heero?\"

Heero didn\'t answer and just kissed him softly in the lips. He didn\'t want to be pessimist but that could be the last time they were in each other arms; he wanted to go to the battle field with the feeling of his lover\'s scent h inh in his skin. Duo was afraid too, but he didn\'t want to believe that something could go wrong; he felt the almost imperceptible way Heero was trembling. Duo let go of him and took the knife he always had attached to his boot, he then undid his braid and cut a really small lock of his long hair. He made it a small braid and then put it around Heero\'s right wrist.

\"Here, now I\'ll be at your side no matter where you are\"

He said smiling to the other boy. Heero was speechless and all he could do was embrace his lover as tight as he could.

\"Duo, you never stop surprising me... I love you so much\"

\"I hope never ever stop surprising you... And I love you too\"

\"I don\'t have anything to give you...\"

\"Here...\"

Duo took his knife and too cut a small lock of Heero\'s hair and then took it into one of his pockets.

\"Now you have a piece of me and I have a piece of you\"

Heero kissed him again and if it weren\'t because of Sally\'s interruption they surely would have stayed that way a longer time.

\"Sorry guys, but all the troops are ready and waiting for orders. The troops Une sent are waiting for Treize\'s orders and I think he wants to talk with you first\"

They nodded and followed her to one of the meeting rooms of the Peacemillion, Duo was walking in front of Heero because he was braiding his hair once again. It looked rather funny, since he seemed to be holding Duo\'s braid the way a child holds his mother hand to not get lost... and in a way, that was exactly how Heero felt.

Noin came to the room some minutes later and was greeted by a discussion between, as estrange as it appeared, Quatre and Treize.

\"You can\'t do that! That way you\'ll only assure your own death! By Allah, use your head!\"

\"And what do you suggest Mr. Winner?\"

Even when Treize\'s voice was calm, the sarcasm in it was too obvious.

\"To start the attack from the sides, we have to destroy the cannon first and then move to the front. The Libra is slow because of its size and won\'t be able to get in position fast enough\"

\"But Quatre, it still can fire towards the earth\"

The blonde sighed.

\"Duo, tibraibra will shoot the beam cannon when they see our attack and be sure that any of us willof aof any use if we\'re death. The way I suggest gives us at least a chance to stop the cannon before it can be fired. If we attack from the sides and towards the cannon there\'s a possibility of destroying it\"

Treize saw the logic of Quatre\'s plan, but it still had a flaw.

\"But if we\'re to late they will shoot against earth\"

\"That\'s a risk we\'ll have to take, because there\'s no way a bunch of gundams will stop the bean from hitting the earth. No matter what strategy we choose they still will shoot the earth if we\'re not fast\"

\"I agree with Quatre, but we still need a plan of action\"

\"What do you mean Yuy?\"

\"Miss Noin, would you please change the angle of the Libra and enlarge the image?\"

\"Yes\"

Noin made the holographic image that was in the center of the table change its angle and then made it bigger. Heero looked at it and then turned to Noin again.

\"See if you can enlarge this part even more\"

\"Sure\"

She pressed some buttons and the image got big enough for them to see the details of the surface. Heero scanned he image and finally he could find what he was looking for. In the center of the station called Libra, near the borders that where the beam cannon where three rectangular boxes.

\"These are the controls of the coolers, those keep the inner temperature of the cannon low so it won\'t explode. There are three of these at each side of the cannon so in total they\'re twelve. If we destroy those their system will indicate the malfunction and they won\'t fire it, or the station will explode. Then we have to attack the cannon in a frontal way\"

Trowa raised a brow at that.

\"The station would still explode then... there will be parts that can go towards the earth, if they\'re too big they can cause big damages\"

Heero nodded.

\"Yes, and that\'s why I need the Maguanacs and some Taurus prepared to take care of that. Quatre, they will send MS to fight against us and I want you to lead the attack. Treize I want you to tell your men to follow Quatre\'s orders no matter what\"

\"I will\"

Treize was amazed at the strategic abilities the pilots were displaying; he knew they were good but never thought they were this good.

\"Now that the attack towards Libra is ready we need to prepare the attack to the troops Tubarov will send. I think the bet ones to take care of that are Zechs, Wufei, Noin and Treize. Once Lady Une sends the rest of the troops you\'ll have more chances to defeat them fastly. If anything happens call Duo or me\"

Heero concluded and Quatre took the word once again.

\"Once the battles are over come back to the Peacemillion\"

They all nodded.

\"Well, now that everything is clear we better start moving. I\'ll call the Maguanacs to tell them about the plan, they must be close by now. Treize, did Lady Une tell you when she would be sending the rest of the troops?\"

\"They\'re ready to join us as soon as I give the order\"

Duo looked at him with narrowed eyes.

\"Is Lady Une coming too?\"

\"Be sure Duo, that there\'s no being in earth, the colonies or Heaven that can stop her from coming. Sadly not even myself\"

Duo noticed the sad expression on his face.

\"I see\"

Heero looked at Duo suspiciously.

\"Duo?\"

\"Don\'t worry Hee-chan... I\'ll tell you later, but there\'s nothing that you should be worried about\"

Heero didn\'t ask him anything else, he knew Duo never lied so if he said he shouldn\'t get worried then he shouldn\'t. They all left the room and headed towards the hangars; each of them were serious and very aware of the implications of failure. They all were determined not to fail, the future of the earth and the colonies was in their hands and there was no way they would disappoint them.

~tbc~

Now... theail ail address are FICTITIOUS!! That means that no matter how much you try to write them they won\'t write you back. Hehehe... I tried it already!! ^^! ^.~