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Atavism	By : ctsama Category: Dragon Ball Z > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 9192 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 3
Disclaimer: I do not own Dragonball, Dragonball Z, Dragonball Super, Resurrection 'F', or Battle of Gods or the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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Rebirth II

Goku couldn’t believe what he was seeing at first. It was nothing short of a nightmare that had appeared out of thin air before him.

His son, his firstborn son, kind, studious with his easy and sincere smile, knelt before Vegeta, his Vegeta whose slender form was dwarfed in the folds of the robe he’d been given at the Lookout, who was on his side with one leg thrown over Gohan’s shoulder, his hips gripped tightly in his son’s lap, his son beyond rage, thrusting painfully into Vegeta’s body, screaming, outraged that he would still fight, His Vegeta…

His Vegeta. Bloody white fluid oozing out of him, still fighting, choking his name out from around the hand at his throat.

Without conscious thought power exploded out of him and Gohan went flying off of Vegeta. Vegeta’s eyes rolled back into his head as he lapsed into unconsciousness and Goku walked the few paces between them to stand over the prone body in unmistakable challenge. The smell of Vegeta’s blood filled his nostrils and stirred and fueled a rage within him that he’d never known before.

Gohan rose to his feet, his anger roiling. “This doesn’t concern you father, and I don’t appreciate you interrupting us. I was so close!” he roared. “Why are you even here? He’s better off with me!”

“Better off?” Goku couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Look at what you’ve done to him, he would rather have killed himself than let you have him. You call this better off?!”

“It needed to be done, he has to accept his place, you know that as well as I-” He broke off, simply looked at him with pity. “You don’t even know what he really is, do you father? You’ve felt it from the beginning, right? That he was different, important in some way even before he changed himself. He unlocked more than just the ability to bear exceptional children. There’s more than one reason his kind were fought over.”

“Beyond being mine, I don’t care what Vegeta is,” Goku growled angrily. “You kept him away from me, violated our bond, forced children on him and he still found a way to get away from you to come back to me. You’ve failed in subduing him. Now back down or face me.”

“Me, back down?” Gohan laughed. “How about I give you a chance to leave peacefully. Take it, Dad. We both know I’m stronger than you. It’s a lot less shameful than getting your ass handed to you by your own son.”

“Stronger? Maybe. A better fighter, not likely. I’ll take that challenge.”

Goku, pushed beyond all boundaries, exploded into his third form and the very air trembled at his wrath.

____________________________________________________________________________
Vegeta came to amid blasts and shouts sounding all around him. He sat up painfully to see Goku battling his eldest in a rage. Gohan’s unleashed strength and power were keeping up with the amazing power of the third Super Saiyan form and Vegeta grimaced.

Goku was dominating the fight, hell, more than dominating. He was beating the ever-loving shit out of Gohan, but Gohan wasn’t stupid. He knew how difficult the third form was to use because of the massive energy drain, and knew the key to beating it was outlasting Goku’s stamina.

Vegeta watched and didn’t like what he was seeing. It was no good. Goku was too enraged to see it, but he could.

//He’s barely fighting, conserving his energy, only using it to shield. Drop down into your first form. He will exhaust you and finish you otherwise.//

It’s not strong enough, I have to end this now!

//You’re wrong Kakarot. Drop down. Take what I’ve learned and you can conserve your energy better than he can. You’ll be stronger than him and you can maintain that strength as long as you need.//

After an intense struggle with his own fury Goku accepted the new information and did as Vegeta bade him. He was stunned at the power in him, it was exhilarating. Vegeta had been right. He looked back at his son and saw fear in his eyes. Gohan knew the truth as well. The fight was over.

He started fighting in earnest but it was futile. Goku charged him hard, roaring as he closed. He knocked Gohan back in a successive series of punches too fast to block and so hard they sent shock waves through the air.

Goku pulled back and let loose with the last one, sending Gohan plummeting toward the Earth like a limp doll. He crashed hard. He wasn’t ready to concede defeat though, climbing painfully back to his feet.

Goku touched down before him, energy still crackling all around him. Gohan panted harshly and Goku’s eyes narrowed. “If you were anyone else I would kill you, do you understand? With my bare hands. But you are my son, and… I can’t. I will have your word that you won’t come near Vegeta ever again.”

Gohan cursed. “Are you really that naïve? You honestly think I’m going to make this that easy for you? I won’t give my word, I have no intention of letting him go. You won this fight but you haven’t defeated me. I’m out of practice. Next time it won’t be so easy, and there will be a next time. For once in your life you have to deal with me. No training, no pushing me off onto someone else, just me and you with Vegeta in the balance. I’m not going anywhere, and I won’t stop trying to take away what you don’t deserve. Now what will you do with your son, father?” he spat.

Goku was barely holding the rage back. What he’d seen, what he knew Vegeta had gone through at Gohan's hands filled him. “I’m starting to think I can kill you after all,” Goku said coldly.

But Gohan only smiled in a way that sent chills down Goku’s spine. “Do it. I’m tied to Vegeta now. I’ll take him with me. You know that death won’t break the bond. He’ll be with me forever.”

Vegeta watched in silence, feeling Goku’s pain as if it were his own. He couldn’t let Gohan go, couldn’t keep a constant vigil over him, couldn’t kill him. His body protested mightily but he had to move. He concentrated the last of his resources, stood, blinked out and reappeared beside Goku.

//There might be a better way.// “Hold him still.”

Goku wasted no time in locking Gohan in a tight hold. Vegeta approached them while Gohan watched him warily. The wind whipped his blood-stained robe around his body as he moved forward.

What are you going to do?

//It was something Dende said... I think he can be restored. I’m going to try.//

Vegeta could taste Goku’s alarm. //It’s the only way to deal with him and I’m the only one strong enough to pull it off. Let’s get this over with.//

Vegeta dropped his right hand to Gohan’s forehead and forced him to meet his gaze. “You wanted to taste my ruthlessness. Lucky you, you’re about to get your wish,” Vegeta snarled.

It all happened so fast. He could feel Gohan’s thoughts, saw his intention use the last of his power to shake off Goku, grab for him and make a run for it through Transmission and by the time he spoke the words of warning it would be too late. Gohan’s muscles were tensing, he was moving though it didn’t register yet and like a sprung trap it was too late to stop the sequence of events about to unfold. He couldn’t redirect his own energies fast enough to make a difference and his core filled with dread; he wouldn’t survive another assault and he knew it.

In a blind panic he flailed, reached out on instinct and pulled Goku in. Through a curious three-way sharing through Vegeta, Goku saw it as well. The force and speed of Goku’s reaction was staggering.

Goku’s barely contained disbelief and rage flared again and Gohan’s plan never got off the ground. “You will not take him from me again!” he roared, jamming his knee into Gohan’s lower back and pulling so hard Gohan’s vision went white from the pain and his legs went limp. Goku shoved him forward a step and slammed him to his knees in front of Vegeta before driving his face into the dirt with a hand on the back of his head.

Vegeta watched them gasping in shock, more than a little in awe of what had just happened and how. After a moment Goku felt it too and they reached out to each other curiously. When they realized what was happening Goku just nodded slowly and Vegeta trembled a little. Were they human, it might have been flowers and candy, but they were made of harder stuff.

This was an enemy that had harmed him. Goku had placed him on his knees at Vegeta’s feet and presented him as a gift.

It had the effect their shared heritage intended. Any fear Vegeta had vanished as he absorbed the fact that Goku could control him and wasn’t going to let Gohan hurt him again. It was a strange feeling. Instead of chafing at the knowledge that he was being protected he felt… safe.

As soon as Gohan came back to himself he nodded to Goku who dragged his head up off the ground. He was still dazed and Vegeta’s eyes once again filled with the rage born of all the pain Gohan had put him through. Gohan pulled at his Super Saiyan bonds in futility and Vegeta scoffed. “Why are you fighting this so hard? At least I don’t have to fuck your body to fuck your mind. Now be a good boy before you piss off Daddy again.” He closed his eyes, grit his teeth and crossed over the bond Gohan had forced on him. He was a strong telepath though he hated touching minds with anyone else. Still far from ‘normal,’ he at least felt stronger in mind now than he had in months, strong enough to control Gohan’s comparatively less disciplined mind. He drove his will through the bond, searching.

Gohan tried to shield, tried to hold him off but he learned the lesson that he had taught to Vegeta so well, that in the field of the mind it was easier by far to attack than defend. And Gohan was not practised at defense. Vegeta tore through his shields as if they were tissue paper, and he was none too gentle about it.

He found the seat of Gohan’s power. Some of it came from his human side, some came from catalyzing boosts given him by Guardians or Kais, and some came from his own training and development. Those, Vegeta left alone. But the majority came from the newly opened pathways to his Saiyan genetic heritage. Those had to be destroyed. Vegeta wielded his will with all the skill of a surgeon, collapsing every one of those pathways, leaving everything else untouched. His next target was Gohan’s logic and morality. He simply obliterated everything that had a Saiyan feel to it.

He knew it hurt. Could feel Gohan screaming.

It was a satisfying sound.

Vegeta watched long enough to sense remorse, proof that Gohan’s humanity was returning. He backed off a little, intending to wipe Gohan’s memory of everything that had happened, allowing him to finally be free of the Saiyan influence that he had feared before this all started. But Goku stopped him.

Let him remember.

//Kakarot? Why?//

The day may come when he learns to reawaken the power inside him. The only thing that might keep him from losing himself again is knowing what he could become if that happens.

Vegeta reluctantly acquiesced in the face of Goku’s certainty.

He released Gohan’s mind and the younger Saiyan groaned and collapsed to the ground as Goku let him go. Vegeta shuddered and backed away. The job was done but he could still feel the other’s mind through that unwanted bond. Gohan wouldn’t be able to attack him through it anymore, but it was still there. He would have to stay shielded at all times to keep that door closed. He felt sick. Gohan was back to what he has once been, but it would never change what he had done. Vegeta knew he wasn’t strong enough to live with a mental link to his rapist for the rest of his life.

Goku felt his revulsion and hopelessness and there was no way he was going to let Vegeta suffer that. “Vegeta.” He held out his hand and Vegeta came to him, taking it as he had on a night so long ago. He pulled the smaller man into his arms, breathed him in. If he held on a little too tightly he couldn’t be blamed. “I missed you so much,” he whispered. Vegeta shook in his arms and couldn’t stop. He was finally where he had so desperately wanted and needed to be and Goku could feel it without him saying a word.

Through the intense emotions he felt Goku’s fingers slipping through his hair. “I can help. May I?” He asked. After being invaded so often and so violently being asked was so novel Vegeta would have laughed had it not made him want to cry. Without hesitation Vegeta closed his eyes and tipped his head back in surrender.

Goku’s eyes met his son’s, he held them as he leaned down and locked those fingers gently in Vegeta’s hair. On some fundamental level he needed Gohan to know what it was that he tried and failed to take from him, the vast difference between holding someone and holding them down, the insurmountable distance between submission and subjugation. Vegeta knew what was coming and braced himself. Goku grazed the skin over Vegeta’s pulse with his teeth at first, sending a shiver down his spine. Still brazenly staring Gohan down he sank sharp teeth into his flesh and Vegeta moaned at how much cleaner it made him feel.

The act made their bond flare to life, and Goku found Vegeta’s normally iron mental presence too weak to match him in it. The bond hummed through him and as he accepted it he began to understand Vegeta better. He even understood the things Vegeta hadn’t understood or wanted to admit to himself.

Vegeta had started it, not him. As they had progressed from enemies to reluctant allies, from grudging respect to friendship Vegeta had wanted to become closer, to know him better but hadn’t known how to express himself, hadn’t known how to communicate. He had cried out for Goku in the only way he could: silently, telepathically. Goku sensed it on that same level and had returned it unknowingly, leading to the true but tenuous connection they now shared. Vegeta had started it, they would finish it together. But in between...

It was his to strengthen.

Goku surged through the bond and he felt Vegeta tremble hard against him, hands gripping his biceps for support. He poured more and more power, more and more of himself into it and it blazed back to life, growing stronger and stronger, burning away every lingering trace of Gohan’s touch.

When he finally drew away Vegeta moaned, overloaded.

Goku licked his neck in apology before quietly speaking. “Did it work?” Can you feel him anymore?

“Just you,” Vegeta confirmed in disbelief. //How did you know-//

He grunted in pain and swayed. Goku steadied him and stopped his questions. “We’ll talk later. Right now you need to rest.” Vegeta frowned up at him and tried to turn, to keep an eye on Gohan but Goku just caught his chin in his hand and held his gaze. “I’m here now. Let go.” At Goku’s words he nodded, let himself pass out, knowing he was safe and Goku hooked an arm under his knees and lifted him in his arms, holding him close. Even unconscious Goku could feel his presence strongly within him. It was incredible, he hadn’t realized how empty he had been until this moment.

And he had almost lost it before he’d even really had it.

It didn’t matter how hard Vegeta fought him on it. He wouldn’t allow them to be parted again.

Gohan drew his attention once more. That same emptiness was settling back into his mind for the first time in months, Goku could tell. He was watching with a mixture of remorse and longing, clearly in pain from both Vegeta’s efforts to restore him and the incineration of his part in the bond. Goku walked over to him, still carrying Vegeta. Gohan sighed heavily, holding back tears as he tried to make sense of his own actions. He rose painfully to his feet, faced his father.

He looked at his father, at the unconscious man held close to his chest. “So where…” he dragged his eyes back up to meet his father’s. “Where do we go from here?”

“I… don’t know, Gohan. I love you, that will never change. I didn’t realize how angry you were with me.”

“Neither did I,” Gohan replied softly.

“I wasn’t there for you like I should have been when you were growing up. I’m sorry for that. I am trying to do better by Goten, but… that’s now. We both bear blame in all this, I know that much too. And as much as I want to mend things…” Goku broke off and when he began again the pain in his voice was overwhelming. “Gohan, after everything he’s survived, what almost destroyed him was you, my son. This is going to take time, for all three of us, I think. For now, just... stay away from him, I mean it. If you come near him while he’s still weak I don’t know how I’ll react.”

Gohan’s eyes dropped to Vegeta again. He’d come so close to destroying him. If his father was going to try to put him back together he needed to know what Gohan knew.

“I started dreaming about it sometimes, after I caught him the first time. About how things were back when the Saiyans were a younger race. Before they were wiped out his kind were fierce fighters, fiercer than most. But when they mated they stopped fighting and submitted to their mates. I don’t think it was biology, it felt more like tradition. I don’t know why but I know they all did it that way. What happened after that involved power for the dominant mate beyond measure. I felt it myself, but only a little since it wasn’t complete. He… He doesn’t know as much as I do. Between his upbringing and who he is… He feels it, what he’s ‘supposed’ to do but he won’t give in. Not unless…”

“Not unless I force him into it like you tried to do.” Goku couldn’t believe all the things Vegeta was trying to fight through just to function, let alone bring children into the world. “Thank you,” he said finally. “That’s more than I knew before.”

Gohan nodded, hoping at least the information could do them both some good. “After everything that’s happened, everything I’ve done… is this all?”

Goku understood what he meant, that he had expected more discipline of the corporal variety.

How little he understood. When Vegeta had asked him why he wanted Gohan to keep his memories he’d told only a partial truth.

He turned to face his son, his love for him at odds with his fury at the treatment of his mate. He knew he was playing a dangerous game in letting Gohan remember but he didn’t care. The familial tie meant nothing to the needs of his blood. What his son had done was so egregious it required nothing short of a death sentence at his hands. If he was to let Gohan leave here alive he had to satisfy that need to mete out retribution some other way.

“I am punishing you, far worse than you realize. You have two beautiful, powerful daughters by him out there somewhere whose earliest memory might very well be protecting the man who nurtured them in his own body against your attacks. You have to live with that and it’s not going to be easy, especially when they come looking for answers someday.

“And the worst part, the part that’s going to haunt you for the rest of your life is that I didn’t let him wipe your memory.” His eyes narrowed and Gohan took an involuntary step back. “When all three of us were touching I saw it Gohan. You’ve wanted him for a long time. You could have faced your fears at any time, I would have helped you, so would Piccolo. If you had you would have accepted your power, learned to control it instead of running away from it. Embracing the strength and confidence that came with the blood I gave you might have made things different between you. And now you remember, you will always remember what it was to be joined with him, to know his strength, and know that you will never, ever touch it again. That what-if is your punishment. You’ll never know what might have happened, and while he won’t hate you forever, you’ll never have another chance.”

Gohan nodded, tears stinging his eyes. As much as he loved Videl he knew there would now always be something unfulfilled in their relationship. She was human. She would never be able to take the full brunt of his strength, never touch his mind and truly be one with him. As Vegeta might have, and willingly, if only he hadn’t been afraid to try.

Harsh punishment indeed, but also justice.

At this the tears finally fell. “I’m sorry, Dad. I’m so sorry. Tell him I’m… no. I’ll tell him. When he’s ready to hear it.”

Goku nodded, the lump in his throat wouldn’t allow him more than that. He put two fingers to his forehead and disappeared with Vegeta.

Left alone, Gohan slumped to his knees, once again finding himself in the empty chasm between one life and another.

What he had done was unthinkable, and he remembered it all. He’d isolated Vegeta like a wolf cutting a single animal from the herd, and then he’d succeeded where Freeza’s best efforts had failed.

Cold and calculating, piece by piece he had taken Vegeta apart.

Even now he remembered everything he had done, and how much pleasure he had drawn from it. It was unreal, like he was watching someone else. Those memories would always be with him now.

He felt sick.

But those times he’d been buried inside Vegeta, both in body and mind when the prince had been too weak to resist, when Gohan could almost pretend that he had been willing… Those thoughts brought it all back.

He watched from around the doorframe, amazed that Vegeta had survived that last session. He’d pushed the gravity up so far his muscles would barely support him now. The way he winced when he moved his upper body in just a certain way, there had to be broken ribs.
When it wasn’t the gravity room it was training, if one could call the torturous techniques he tried training. He did it night after night sometimes, not even waiting until his body had healed. Gohan caught him doing it one night by accident, but had been keeping tabs when he could. Vegeta never noticed, when he devoted everything he had to these sessions of pain he seemed to let his awareness lapse. He’d seen enough to know it had gotten steadily worse over the last six years.
The same amount of time his father had refused to be brought back to his life on Earth.
He knew why Vegeta did it, but he wondered if Vegeta knew why he did it. Pain seemed to be the only thing that drowned the ache his father’s absence left, if only for a while. He’d tried that route himself, but it hadn’t worked for him. For him it had been the opposite, study and the pursuit of academics that made him forget.
Vegeta stumbled on his way upstairs, gasping and sliding painfully down the wall. Gohan dashed forward without thinking and Vegeta had been genuinely startled at seeing him. “Are you all right?”
“Fine,” the older Saiyan grunted. “Shouldn’t you be asleep? You and the Woman have been holed up working on that paper since this morning.”
“Couldn’t sleep,” he lied easily, not willing to admit to spying. “Gravity room, right? How high did you push it?”
“Six-fifty.”
Gohan whistled. “No wonder you look like you’ve been squashed.”
Vegeta actually chuckled, but it had the unwanted side effect of making the pain worse and he winced again. “Want me to bandage you up?”
“No. It’ll heal.” He made a move to stand and Gohan beat him to it, standing and reaching out a hand to help him up. After a moment of consideration Vegeta took it in his gloved one and Gohan pulled him to his feet.
He was on the lower step and Vegeta was looking him evenly in the eye. Not studying the way he usually met people’s eyes, just looking. Gohan’s heart was thumping hard in his chest and he knew this was the time. Vegeta was hurt, hurting, missing his father and Gohan knew that if he reached out at that moment something might happen between them, something wonderful. He was only fifteen, but Vegeta was so vulnerable that it might not matter.
But the moment had stretched, his free hand remained frozen and locked at his side. Vegeta finally released his hand, turned to go with a muttered ‘good night.’ Only then did his hand raise, following Vegeta’s retreating back but it was too late.
He told himself that even if he’d reached out in time Vegeta never would have taken him seriously. Maybe tomorrow night he’d be able to do it.

Tomorrow night had rolled night after night into another year. His father returned, and it was clear to anyone who bothered to really see that Vegeta had eyes only for him.

He found a woman he could love and respect. He moved on. Until one day he awoke with both the power and the confidence to turn old regrets into fluid action.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to touch you like this.”
“And this is what it takes for you grow a pair big enough to try?”

He dropped to his knees, wept bitterly.

The world had changed. Nothing would ever be the same again. Yet he still... just... wanted... to touch.

He roared in pain and the ground shook.

It hurt. It just hurt.

*************************************************************************************************************
Okay people, help me out. We’re getting closer to the new material in Dragon Ball Super and the Resurrection ‘F’. I’ve written it assuming you guys know the characters, but do I need to change that to introduce characters, settings and the like? Let me know, I don’t want to lose your interest because you have no idea who I’m talking about.

_Candice_: I like the new name! In strangling Goku out of the bond he cut Vegeta off from him. He tried to reach him but he couldn’t. It was a little more clear in previous versions, but google docs doesn’t handle cross-device writing very well sometimes and somewhere along the line it disappeared and I didn’t notice. I fixed it though, thanks for pointing that out. :)

B-chan: I think you’re going to get what you want. I wouldn’t say Goku is going to accept Vegeta’s decisions (okay, I’ll stop being coy, he’s pretty pissed!), and I doubt Vegeta is going to be totally trusting and open to bonding after everything he’s been through. They definitely have some issues to hash out. The only people being understanding are the ones who know him best, and I see them… well, you ever have a loved one get hurt or in crisis? First thing you do is get them fixed up. Then you get relieved/angry at them for getting hurt in the first place. What happens when/if everyone else finds out probably won’t be so neat. Give me til next chapter and let me know if it's what you have in mind as far as Goku freaking out a little, even if it's not. :) PS Omg I just realized where I've seen your name before, you do scanlation work on doujin, don't you? You're awesome! :D

Cara9001: Yaay, I finally get to end a chapter with Goku and Vegeta being together again! :D I wrote that scene with Piccolo about four times, mostly for myself. One had a slow clap in it, one had “no shit, Sherlock,” one had him facepalming. It made me laugh! I can’t wait to get to get the next chapter out!
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Atavism