unrequited

unrequited


disclaimer: consider me the non-owner
warning: usual smut
an: the end is drawing near… by the way, quality or quantity? Which do you prefer? No rushing me!



//I only see myself
reflected in your eyes
so all that I believe I am
essentially are lies
and everything I\'ve hoped to be or ever thought I was
died with your belief in me so who that hell am I? //
stabbing westward, shame



chapter fourteen/war



Blissful ignorance has a tendency to evaporate when faced with the killjoy factor of reality.

Relena should have ale alert to this universal axiom as she entered Lady Une’s office Monday morning, brought in by a frosty message claiming urgency. She had spent the entire night with Trowa engaged in the most blasphemous intimate activities when she heard her pager vibrate onto the floor.

“Ignore it,” He cautioned her, his stiff erection pressed against her inner thigh. She was insistent though – she was, after all, married to her profession. Her affair with Trowa took a backseat when it came to her position, a fact that seemed to pique her lover’s arousal even more. She pushed him off and found a brief, blunt message. MY OFFICE, FIRST THING, UNE. Typically Une’s pages contained more color and syllables when she was in a good mood, so Relena started to get dressed. She doubted anyone but her security detail would notice she wore the same attire as the day before – and even then she had a habit of falling asleep in her office.

She attempted to assemble a respectable image and kissed Trowa deeply before she left. “I will call you later, all right?” She asked.

He gave her his usual smirk and leaned back against the pillows, his arms under his head. He was painfully erect and made no move to conceal it. “I suppose.” He replied. He seemed to enjoy the delayed release, testing his limits. She thought she’d killed him last night – lord knows she was dead tired and sore to the point that walking would be avoided for the rest of the day. But seeing him, watching him as he was in his full, unadorned glory, she bit her lip and pushed her head down, engulfing his erection as best she could, stroking and sucking him with her smooth tongue.

He growled, shifting himself so that he was flat on his back, almost arching further into the wet cavity of her mouth. With quick, fluid movements he twisted her around so that her exposed pussy was at his mouth. Separating her swollen womanhood with his fingers, his tongue met the movements of her own tongue, stroking and caressing, very gently though, her pained, slippery sex.

She moaned, almost chocking on him with surprise. She misplaced the panties and had decided to forgo them luckily – she had never done a 69 before and was surprised at the double sensation, her arousal peaking quickly as she performed her blow job and felt him stroke her with his tongue. She bobbed with each quivering stroke, her whole body shaking as her climax hit, quicker than she’d ever come before, melting over her entire being as he pd hid himself into her mouth.

She crawled down his body, licking the last drop off the side of her mouth. Lifting herself off the bed and onto her shaky feet, she re-adjusted her suit and met his eyes one last time before she took her leave.

She closed the door and sighed. Despite the pain between her thighs, her jelly limbs and her overall exhaustion, she was happy.

Only three months before she was at the bottom of her rope, hanging by threads, desperate. She felt it was over.

And Trowa, the sex, rejuvenated her. How…. peculiar.

It amused her to have been so naïve once, not long ago, and chastised Heero for forming sex-based relationships. She thought of them as cheap, superficial, demeaning – something she could never be capable of forming. She had too much pride, too much self-respect. Little did she realize that neither characteristic would be involved or affected. Instead of cheap and used, she felt liberated. Her life was now something beyond paperwork and red tape, she could see past her desk, past the empty smiles and false promises. It gave her prospective and hope that she wouldn’t be alone forever, that she was still young and had time. She was capable of loving and being loved.

Three months was all it took to turn her whole world around.

So when she entered Une’s office and met the stern, stoic faces of her superior, Heero and her brother – she was unprepared for the onslaught long coming.

“Relena aou eou engaged in a sexual relationship with your former security agent?” Une asked point blank.

Her breath caught but Relena wasn’t about to be unfazed. “Yes.” Her voice came strong and smooth.

“Trowa…Barton,” Millardo managed to spit out, his elbon hon his knees, his fingers laced together so tight his fingertips were striped white against a bed of crimson. “You are sleeping with Trowa Barton.”

Her glare shot to Heero who leaned against the far wall, his gaze piercing her with a smoldering heat she’d not seen since he found her naked and tied to her bed. He was angry. Beyond angry – because she knew he could hide his emotions. The fact she could see and feel the heat only meant trouble. She took a deep breath.

“I’m not a little girl. I’m a grown woman. How dare you, all of you, presume to tell me what I can or cannot do?” Her eyes shot flashes of warning in all directions.

Une’s hand rose to silence her. “We presume nothing. We are looking out for your best interests, as well as those of ESUN. Your position automatically dictates a code of etiquette and social behavior that cannot be squandered. You have an image to uphold, and it is our job to make sure it is kept.”

Relena felt her blood start to boil and her face flush with heat. “An image? Social behavior?” She was nearly chocking on the words. “And at what cost?”

Millardo waved her question off, standing up and taking her hands in his. “How about a trip instead? Some time off? I’ll handle your duties and you can take a break and relax and let go of this…fling. I’m sure when you stop and think about it, you’ll realize what a mistake this destructive rebellion is. You’re not only hurting yourself, Relena, but ESUN’s reputation.”

They didn’t care. They didn’t realize how miserable she was, how lonely she was, how utterly exhausted her position made her. They couldn’t know, wouldn’t let themselves see how thin she’d gotten, how deep the bags under her eyes were. They didn’t see.

For the second time in the past few months she was standing in a room screaming and no one bothered to turn around. Heero couldn’t see, Une couldn’t see, her own flesh and blood couldn’t see. She had never felt more alone in a roomful amilamiliar faces.

“He’s just using you, Relena,” Heero’s voice burst through her curtain of disbelief and despair. “You don’t know him, you don’t know what he’s like. He’s using you, making you question everything, making you his slave. Don’t go to him. He’s slowly destroying you, and you won’t realize it.”

“I realize you’re jealous.” She retorted curtly. “And I realize I’d rather die blissfully ignorant that by any of you, and your claof sof saving me for the greater good. At least when he’s using me, I don’t feel so empty and alone.” She spun on her heel and stormed out of Une’s office, not looking back.

Millardo’s mouth set on a firm line. “It’s gone further than you described, Yuy. I thought you said you solved it, that she could be reasoned with.” He looked to Heero, whose face had returned to its cold, stoic mask.

“I thought it was handled. I was wrong.” He replied, nodding. “I won’t make the same mistake again. I will not be wrong twice.”

“Then do it, and do it now before more damage is done. Relena is too invaluable to the organization to be swayed by some rogue suitor.” Une agreed.

Heero reached into his holster and felt the cold, resolute steel of his firearm, stroked it. Soon, Trowa Barton, he thought. You just never learned why not to cross Heero Yuy.



To be continued….