Kitty In The Middle
folder
Beyblade › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
15
Views:
5,026
Reviews:
41
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Beyblade › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
15
Views:
5,026
Reviews:
41
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Beyblade, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Pot Roast
I have been neglecting my duties as a fiction-writer, at least towards this one. I have no excuse to say here, as the update of chapter 15 (this one) was already posted on ffn. I actually thought I posted it here, I convinced myself so much. It is embarrassing, but hey, now it's here, making even less sense, and you will therefore leave me to live because I can garantee you will wanna know what happens to our favorite couple.
This is a crappy intro, but an intro, so live with it and read the following few hundred words. >.<
----------------------------------------------------
Chapter XV: Pot Roast
----------------------------------------------------
Can you believe it? It’s been a week since anyone, and literally ANYONE hade seen Rei. No one. Nobody. None of our fourteen characters had seen him. Since a week.
And what’s worse, every one seemed to be getting some, except him and his ripe-old companions.
Meaning? Brooklyn and Hiro were at it since day one; Bryan and Kenny were having the time of their life since… some where in the last chapters where they were sharing an ice cream. Boris was doing God knows what (I know and I don’t want to!!!), Voltaire was another one being frigid for every one else’s sanity, Emily got herself a useful tool (with the lovely prejudice of ‘Men can’t satisfy a gay woman’) since forever, Drigger was being passed on as a useful piece of Uke between his three suitors, hell, even Tala got over his… whatever he had and had Max riding him!!! And you won’t believe who the actual Seme in their relationship is… (AHEM!!! I rest my case!)
What was even worse was normally he didn’t get affected by every one else’s hot sex life, but since nearly a week, there was this strong smell in the air, almost like pheromones, that got everyone on horny –mode, especially him. He couldn’t remember ever feeling so depressed in his entire life! Oh GOD!!! He begged, I have never gone to church as a good catholic oy, and I doubt I will ever be able to go there without the sense of dread beforehand and the sinful thoughts of my kitty instead of the Ave Marias, but please, I promise I will at least confess without being to explicit!!! I promise!!! Oh God have mercy!!!
Unfortunately for him, by the time he gathered the guts and hormone-free senses it was dinner time one week after Rei-Rei’s disappearance, every one was having the time of their life in their own special way, in their own corner of the Palace, completely ignoring our poor Kai-Kai and drowning in bliss, while he wailed and screamed and howled in severe erectional pain, and our dear Father in heaven was having his day off. Burdening the Tower of Pisa even more with his catatonic weight or something like that. So nobody paid heed to our dear prince’s pleas and cries of suffering…
So we had a lovely image of him bawling his eyes out and dripping snot handsomely by the tons in the immense backyard, nearly cracking the artistically oarinted crystal walls of the greenhouse right behind.
He was effectively shut up by a threre inched leather boot thrown into his face. And another. And another. Until he was sure that each and every other person living in the place had thrown three pairs of shoes at the least in the very direction of his face. He was so done over he couldn’t utter a single protest when our El Janitoré came and scrapped the left over’s off the precious marble floor. When It moaned, he went back inside, thinking It was some kind of mutated goo Professor Voltaire left to move around by itself again. When he came back, he cursed colours that would bring a rain bow to shame. Shit, he said. Not again. Well, he added, I hope he won’t find that one, like he didn’t find the one that transformed his harmless peony into a Chihuahua-eating crawling six-legged and seven-foot-tall weed. He then whistled and strolled away, making the very hard decision of either a caramel or hazelnut hot chocolate from Starbucks, with or without whipped cream.
We shall leave the important decision to himself.
----------------------------------------------------
Kai, now, dragged his soot-covered arse into the most dreaded part of the entire palace. The East Wing. Pseudo-french-Lumière-Philosopher’s-name dude aka his gramps’ domain. He felt disgusted and fear-induces icy shivers run down his spine, his arms, his legs and the rest of his body, not excluding anything. And yet, this is where the maddening smell came from!!!
Kai couldn’t believe it! That arousing scent, those pheromones, the very stuff that were driving him stalk-raving-mad (besides his obvious loneliness and sexual frustration that was apparent from the beginning anyway) came from where that pruney old lump of shrivel spent his disgusting days doing who-knows-what who-knows-when and who-knows-how!!! Oh now he was worried!!! He didn’t suddenly have the hots for his grandfather, did he??! And an UNGLY one too!!!
Kai decided not to succumb. No matter what his traitorous body would demand of him, no matter what his clouded senses would seduce him to commit, no matter what his primal instincts were inciting him to, he would resist with all he could, with hall he had, with all his fucking hot arse was given. He would stand up, he would fight valiantly, he would draw his sword and attack at any sign of weakness shown by the enemy. He would not give in. he would not give his enemy the satisfaction of seeing him down (1).
A lot of good that did him. He ended up crawling elegantly to the door with the funny smell. When his hand was fiveinches from the wood, a lightening bolt nrealy fried it. Confused and still clouded by the weird smell, he glared cross-eyed at the sky, the only logical origin of the assassination attempt. Looking down from his heavenly thrown, our Lord God hid guiltily behind a cloud. He thought that the creepy-crawly was some kind of mutant-cockroach thingy that looked like a sick cross between a Chihuahua and a dung beetle. And because of that horrendous apparel, he didn’t recognize the one Man he in fact did make in his image. Peeking down once more, he hurriedly ran to St Peter, thinking up some phoney excuse to annoy him.
While cursing God for being so damned blind , he banged the door wiiiiiiiiiiiiiide open with his new-found strength. And he saw…
----------------------------------------------------
… how everyone was packing gigantic suitcases into a gigantic helicopter. A giant yellow chopper. And bloody friggin bright. What the hell…?
“What the hell are you guys doing?”
Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at him. Meaning everyone stopped schlepping heavy duty boxes into a uselessly gigantic chopper.
“What we are doing? We are packing for our trip to Spain. Aren’t you coming with us, boy?” asked Voltaire. Kai could just stare with a wiiiiiiiiide open mouth.
“Hey, Kai-sama, my- our beloved, intelligent, smart, handsome, dashing, daring, lovely, hot, brave, schmexy Voltaire just asked you a question!!!” barked out a leaf-skirt wearing Boris. With a sombrero. And a Hawaiian shirt.
“I will ingnore all the faulty complimants and say yes, I heard him. And I remember. We are going to Spain. What I don’t understand is why you are wearing such crap when they do not correspong to the country we are currently heading to.”
A dead silence rang through the air. Until noticed a flash of something black and shiny. And it smelled irresistible… like before… like…
“Rei!!!”
He moved towards the chopper, wanting to get in and catch up with his love. Instead, he found himself with an armful of disgusting, slobbery Tyson. Who (mysteriously) got shot off into a multi-dimensional box, that was actually just a normal XXL carton, and dumped him into the ‘special luggage compartment’, which was just a bunch of string hanging from the tail of the flying vehicle, dangling the cargo attached at a safe height of 10000 meters above ground, and made in Azoo. An imaginary country that made the several records, among them being the most indebted country in the world, acting filthy rich and living above their standards, being assholes to the neighboring countries and making the worst quality artefacts in the entire multiverse. And they’re friggin proud of it.
But I digress; indeed they were now all in the chopper, on the way to Spain, enjoying the peace and quiet of the several-roomed place. Who knew that forty five rooms could be built in a helicopter? The passengers much more enjoyed the slight squawking noises from outside, that came from the trailing cargo behind. It was nice to hear them suffer… but then…
“Hey, Kai’s Granddad” yelled a squished-by-Max Tala “What are we gonna do this time in Spain? Are we gonna watch that bull-fighting thing again? That was awesome!!!”
“YEAH!!!” yelled Dranzer, accompanied by his other two moronic companions “it was awesome!!!”
“Now, now, boys, we all know that that sort of activity is immoral and distasteful, and just as useless as death penalty. Think of something else, like the food for example.” Voltaire said ina philosophical manner.
Drigger and Emily nodded simultaneously. Kai just banged against the door, where he thought Rei was. Rei just looked at him in the door behind him, accusingly.
“For once that old freak is right.” Said Drigger.
“Exactly” added Emily from the cockpit (2), and full of sarcasm said “Honestly, I bet it must be just THAT exiting to see one lone, strong, brave, specimen of a man, standing fearlessly in front of a half a ton of furious, angry, steaming pot-roast.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1) What enemy? His dick?
2) I SOOOOO had to try to not laugh at this. I mean; cockpit, what kind of perverse pig invented that word??? Pffff…
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Und? whaddya think? Review please!!! 4 reviews. to see what you think. mebe if i am nice i will even look at this site again. C: ya never know.. i might forget i even wrote this thing... :D In total that would make... 39 + 4. I hope to see the sum of that addition soon... CX I AM SO CRUEL!!! XD ah i love meself...
... I hate doing ad, but I wanna. So I'll so it.
You all know how Faery Tales end up when I start making use of them. Ever wondered about Greek mythology? Check out my rpofile and the Weiss kreuz fics!!! This myth: Ganymed.
If you need a good 'bout of laughter and nonsense, then please visit my Irish Ballad, also in that section.
XD Ad over, I implore to all with a yaoi-livin' heart to review and tell me what you think about this!!! And maybe also the pot roast-thing... I wanna know how pple look to that... >.>
This is a crappy intro, but an intro, so live with it and read the following few hundred words. >.<
----------------------------------------------------
Chapter XV: Pot Roast
----------------------------------------------------
Can you believe it? It’s been a week since anyone, and literally ANYONE hade seen Rei. No one. Nobody. None of our fourteen characters had seen him. Since a week.
And what’s worse, every one seemed to be getting some, except him and his ripe-old companions.
Meaning? Brooklyn and Hiro were at it since day one; Bryan and Kenny were having the time of their life since… some where in the last chapters where they were sharing an ice cream. Boris was doing God knows what (I know and I don’t want to!!!), Voltaire was another one being frigid for every one else’s sanity, Emily got herself a useful tool (with the lovely prejudice of ‘Men can’t satisfy a gay woman’) since forever, Drigger was being passed on as a useful piece of Uke between his three suitors, hell, even Tala got over his… whatever he had and had Max riding him!!! And you won’t believe who the actual Seme in their relationship is… (AHEM!!! I rest my case!)
What was even worse was normally he didn’t get affected by every one else’s hot sex life, but since nearly a week, there was this strong smell in the air, almost like pheromones, that got everyone on horny –mode, especially him. He couldn’t remember ever feeling so depressed in his entire life! Oh GOD!!! He begged, I have never gone to church as a good catholic oy, and I doubt I will ever be able to go there without the sense of dread beforehand and the sinful thoughts of my kitty instead of the Ave Marias, but please, I promise I will at least confess without being to explicit!!! I promise!!! Oh God have mercy!!!
Unfortunately for him, by the time he gathered the guts and hormone-free senses it was dinner time one week after Rei-Rei’s disappearance, every one was having the time of their life in their own special way, in their own corner of the Palace, completely ignoring our poor Kai-Kai and drowning in bliss, while he wailed and screamed and howled in severe erectional pain, and our dear Father in heaven was having his day off. Burdening the Tower of Pisa even more with his catatonic weight or something like that. So nobody paid heed to our dear prince’s pleas and cries of suffering…
So we had a lovely image of him bawling his eyes out and dripping snot handsomely by the tons in the immense backyard, nearly cracking the artistically oarinted crystal walls of the greenhouse right behind.
He was effectively shut up by a threre inched leather boot thrown into his face. And another. And another. Until he was sure that each and every other person living in the place had thrown three pairs of shoes at the least in the very direction of his face. He was so done over he couldn’t utter a single protest when our El Janitoré came and scrapped the left over’s off the precious marble floor. When It moaned, he went back inside, thinking It was some kind of mutated goo Professor Voltaire left to move around by itself again. When he came back, he cursed colours that would bring a rain bow to shame. Shit, he said. Not again. Well, he added, I hope he won’t find that one, like he didn’t find the one that transformed his harmless peony into a Chihuahua-eating crawling six-legged and seven-foot-tall weed. He then whistled and strolled away, making the very hard decision of either a caramel or hazelnut hot chocolate from Starbucks, with or without whipped cream.
We shall leave the important decision to himself.
----------------------------------------------------
Kai, now, dragged his soot-covered arse into the most dreaded part of the entire palace. The East Wing. Pseudo-french-Lumière-Philosopher’s-name dude aka his gramps’ domain. He felt disgusted and fear-induces icy shivers run down his spine, his arms, his legs and the rest of his body, not excluding anything. And yet, this is where the maddening smell came from!!!
Kai couldn’t believe it! That arousing scent, those pheromones, the very stuff that were driving him stalk-raving-mad (besides his obvious loneliness and sexual frustration that was apparent from the beginning anyway) came from where that pruney old lump of shrivel spent his disgusting days doing who-knows-what who-knows-when and who-knows-how!!! Oh now he was worried!!! He didn’t suddenly have the hots for his grandfather, did he??! And an UNGLY one too!!!
Kai decided not to succumb. No matter what his traitorous body would demand of him, no matter what his clouded senses would seduce him to commit, no matter what his primal instincts were inciting him to, he would resist with all he could, with hall he had, with all his fucking hot arse was given. He would stand up, he would fight valiantly, he would draw his sword and attack at any sign of weakness shown by the enemy. He would not give in. he would not give his enemy the satisfaction of seeing him down (1).
A lot of good that did him. He ended up crawling elegantly to the door with the funny smell. When his hand was fiveinches from the wood, a lightening bolt nrealy fried it. Confused and still clouded by the weird smell, he glared cross-eyed at the sky, the only logical origin of the assassination attempt. Looking down from his heavenly thrown, our Lord God hid guiltily behind a cloud. He thought that the creepy-crawly was some kind of mutant-cockroach thingy that looked like a sick cross between a Chihuahua and a dung beetle. And because of that horrendous apparel, he didn’t recognize the one Man he in fact did make in his image. Peeking down once more, he hurriedly ran to St Peter, thinking up some phoney excuse to annoy him.
While cursing God for being so damned blind , he banged the door wiiiiiiiiiiiiiide open with his new-found strength. And he saw…
----------------------------------------------------
… how everyone was packing gigantic suitcases into a gigantic helicopter. A giant yellow chopper. And bloody friggin bright. What the hell…?
“What the hell are you guys doing?”
Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at him. Meaning everyone stopped schlepping heavy duty boxes into a uselessly gigantic chopper.
“What we are doing? We are packing for our trip to Spain. Aren’t you coming with us, boy?” asked Voltaire. Kai could just stare with a wiiiiiiiiide open mouth.
“Hey, Kai-sama, my- our beloved, intelligent, smart, handsome, dashing, daring, lovely, hot, brave, schmexy Voltaire just asked you a question!!!” barked out a leaf-skirt wearing Boris. With a sombrero. And a Hawaiian shirt.
“I will ingnore all the faulty complimants and say yes, I heard him. And I remember. We are going to Spain. What I don’t understand is why you are wearing such crap when they do not correspong to the country we are currently heading to.”
A dead silence rang through the air. Until noticed a flash of something black and shiny. And it smelled irresistible… like before… like…
“Rei!!!”
He moved towards the chopper, wanting to get in and catch up with his love. Instead, he found himself with an armful of disgusting, slobbery Tyson. Who (mysteriously) got shot off into a multi-dimensional box, that was actually just a normal XXL carton, and dumped him into the ‘special luggage compartment’, which was just a bunch of string hanging from the tail of the flying vehicle, dangling the cargo attached at a safe height of 10000 meters above ground, and made in Azoo. An imaginary country that made the several records, among them being the most indebted country in the world, acting filthy rich and living above their standards, being assholes to the neighboring countries and making the worst quality artefacts in the entire multiverse. And they’re friggin proud of it.
But I digress; indeed they were now all in the chopper, on the way to Spain, enjoying the peace and quiet of the several-roomed place. Who knew that forty five rooms could be built in a helicopter? The passengers much more enjoyed the slight squawking noises from outside, that came from the trailing cargo behind. It was nice to hear them suffer… but then…
“Hey, Kai’s Granddad” yelled a squished-by-Max Tala “What are we gonna do this time in Spain? Are we gonna watch that bull-fighting thing again? That was awesome!!!”
“YEAH!!!” yelled Dranzer, accompanied by his other two moronic companions “it was awesome!!!”
“Now, now, boys, we all know that that sort of activity is immoral and distasteful, and just as useless as death penalty. Think of something else, like the food for example.” Voltaire said ina philosophical manner.
Drigger and Emily nodded simultaneously. Kai just banged against the door, where he thought Rei was. Rei just looked at him in the door behind him, accusingly.
“For once that old freak is right.” Said Drigger.
“Exactly” added Emily from the cockpit (2), and full of sarcasm said “Honestly, I bet it must be just THAT exiting to see one lone, strong, brave, specimen of a man, standing fearlessly in front of a half a ton of furious, angry, steaming pot-roast.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1) What enemy? His dick?
2) I SOOOOO had to try to not laugh at this. I mean; cockpit, what kind of perverse pig invented that word??? Pffff…
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Und? whaddya think? Review please!!! 4 reviews. to see what you think. mebe if i am nice i will even look at this site again. C: ya never know.. i might forget i even wrote this thing... :D In total that would make... 39 + 4. I hope to see the sum of that addition soon... CX I AM SO CRUEL!!! XD ah i love meself...
... I hate doing ad, but I wanna. So I'll so it.
You all know how Faery Tales end up when I start making use of them. Ever wondered about Greek mythology? Check out my rpofile and the Weiss kreuz fics!!! This myth: Ganymed.
If you need a good 'bout of laughter and nonsense, then please visit my Irish Ballad, also in that section.
XD Ad over, I implore to all with a yaoi-livin' heart to review and tell me what you think about this!!! And maybe also the pot roast-thing... I wanna know how pple look to that... >.>