Gohan wa Byouki no ka?

TRANSLATION: Gohan is sick? The complete cure is sex!
DISCLAIMER: I don\'t own Dragonball, Toriyama Akira-sensei does. But if I did...well, for starters, Videl would be an out lesbian, just for my out lesbian cousin. I think we all know how the rest goes.

“What’s g wig with him? Why doesn’t he go at it?” Bulma muttered, ear pressed to the door.
“Maybe hesn’esn’t want to get sick,” Kuririn suggested from underneath, eyeing the door he was listening through with a tentative look.
“Oh, that’s not romantic at all,” Bulma muttered.
“Romance?! Medical sex is not a time for *romance*, woman! It’s a time for getting better, and having fun while you do it!” Vegeta told her.
“Oh, shut up, you, you can’t even hear what’s going on in there,” Bulma muttered.
“Oh, yes he can.” Gokuu whapped Vegeta upside the head. “Quit listening to my son have sex!”
“Calm down, they haven’t even started yet,” Bulma told her friend, waving a hand at him in a peaceful manner, ear still glued to the door.
“Get away from that door!” Gokuu ordered, grabbing his two friends by the backs of their shirts and forcibly removing them. “You guys are gross. C’mon, Chichi made dinner.”
Kuririn hurried to the kitchen, glad for a good enough reason to be dragged away from the temptation of voyeurism; Vegeta and Bulma followed, ushered in by Gokuu.
“Alright, but if I t het hear some lovin’ going on soon, I’m going to have to go back up there,” Bulma promisedshe she sat down at the table.
“Oh, we installed sound-proof walls when Piccolo-sa moved in,” Chichi said. “Can’t hear a thing. Saved Goten a good deal of therapy.”
“Oh…”
Kuririn couldn’t help but feel that Bulma sounded a bit too disappointed in the news.

The sound-proof walls, however, were not being used very well at the moment. Gohan was seated on the bed, arms crossed over his chest, and looking very much the angry young man he was, though made a lot less threatening by the continuous sneezing and coughing bouts. Piccolo sat in the furthermost corner of the room; at first glance, he appeared to be meditating, but in truth, he was really just very very angry.
Finally, Piccolo broke the silence.
“I just don’t feel comfortable taking advantage of you while you’re not right!” Piccolo exclaimed.
“Take *advantage?!* Not *right?!* Piccolo-san, I have the *flu*, I’m not half-conscious!”
Piccolo grunted, which was a sure sign that he knew Gohan was right, but refused to acknowledge it.
Time to bring out the big guns.
“Oh, I see,” Gohan said slyly. “I see. I understand, Piccolo-san.”
“…you do?” Piccolo looked at Gohan strangely.
“Yes, of course I do, Piccolo-san.”
“…what are you plotting, Gohan?” Piccolo narrowed his dark eyes at his mate.
“Nothing, Piccolo-san. After all,” Gohan looked at his former mentor with half-lidded eyes, mouth curved up in a slight smirk that looked disturbingly right on Gohan’s face. “…I can’t change your mind if you’re scared, Piccolo-san.”
Piccolo was on him in a second, pinning Gohan to the bed.
“*What did you say?!*” he demanded.
“Well,” Gohan managed not to grin, “obviously you’re afraid of catching my *Earthling* flu, Piccolo-san.” He coughed for good measure.
Piccolo’s left eye twitched.
“*Afraid,* am I?! We’ll just see who’s afraid, Gohan!” Piccolo pressed the younger male into the bed with a furious kiss, hands ripping at Gohan’s clothes.
Piccolo paused, however, a few moments later when he realized that he and Gohan were both very much naked; Gohan was still panting from the kiss.
“Damn it,” Piccolo muttered.
“Oh, Piccolo-san, you don’t need to keep up a butch front for *me.* It’s okay if you’re afraid…of some Earth illne- oomph!”
Gohan trembled, thrapprapped his arms shakingly around his lover’s shoulders as Piccolo paused inside of him.
“Showed you, didn’t I, Gohan? Ha!” Piccolo smirked before realizing what he had just done. “Damn it!”
Piccolo moved to pull out, but was stopped as Gohan locked his ankles behind Piccolo’s back.
“Gohan…”
“Piccolo-san. Shut up. And fuck me.”
“Gohan, the lub-”
“I don’t care about the lubricant! You’re in now, so just *fuck* me already! *Please!*” Gohan rocked his hips against his lover’s.
Piccolo hesitated for a moment, searching Gohan’s dark eyes.
Gohan sneezed.

“Is it my imagination, or is the house shaking?” Bulma asked.
Gokuu just stared at his plate, not pausing in his eating; Chichi poured Kuririn some more coffee.
“Son-kun? Chichi-san? I, ah, think it’s an earthqua-”
Kuririn leaned up and whispered something in Bulma’s ear.
“…damn soundproof walls,” Bulma muttered darkly into her cup.
Vegeta couldn’t stop laughing.