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Tourniquet	By : DementedGosip Category: Gundam Wing/AC > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 982 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing/AC, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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~*~Tourniquet~*~

I wonder now , if I can
just
stay asleep like this for a little while longer. Maybe I won’t
have
to wake up . . . But no, I know I’m waking up now, in that
strange stage between sleep and consciousness. I realize now why
I woke up. The phones ringing, who knows how long now? I
wonder
who would be calling me?
Maybe the school,
wondering
why I didn’t come to school. Wait, what time is it anyway?
Maybe school hasn’t even started yet, or maybe it’s already
ended?
blinking my eyes open was pretty hard to do considering there was light
pooling in from my window onto my face. But even if school hasn’t
started yet, I think I’ll stay home today. I’m an ex-gundam
pilot,
I deserve to take a brake when ever the hell I feel like it right?

Adjusting my eyes to the
light
I focus on my digital clock maybe three feet away on a small
dresser.
I just stared at it a moment, seeing the numbers but not actually
taking
them in. It took a few more seconds for the numbers to
click.
11:53am. So school had started already, hm? I suppose I’d
normally
be at lunch right now. But I’m not at all hungry. Actually,
that’s not surprising. Even when I am at school I normally don’t
eat at lunch. I’m not anorexic, I’ll eat dinner, sometimes a
small
snack after school. I’m just never hungry in the mornings or at
school.
You see, I’ll eat lunch on the weekends no problem, weird, huh?

The ringing suddenly
stopped,
and I remembered I had woken up to get the phone. Oh well, too
late
now. I zoned out and whoever was calling just gave up, like usual.

I wonder if you went to
school
today Duo? Or maybe that was you calling , to see why I wasn’t at
school? No. I find that very unlikely. But whoever it
was, I think really wants to talk to me for some reason, considering
the
phone is ringing again. Well, I suppose I could answer it.

Getting up to walk over
to
the phone reminded me of how little water I’d drank in the last couple
of days. I almost fell five times making my way over to the
phone.
But like I said earlier, it’s probably attendance at the school.

“. . . Hello?”
Shit,
my voice sound all crackly and strained from sleeping. It’s just
the same after you’ve cried for hours though, but that’s defiantly not
going to be my excuse if they ask . . . not that I think they would.

“Heero, are you
okay?
You didn’t come to school today?” No shit Sherlock. That
would
be why I answered the phone at home. Well, any hopes I might have
held of it being Duo were crushed when that voiced answered. It
was
none other that Relena. I don’t hate her or anything.
Actually,
we used to have a friendship going. But . . . We’re just too
different.
Even if we both wanted the friendship more than anything, I don’t think
it could work. But Relena didn’t seem to agree with these
thoughts
of mine, considering she liked to cling to me and flirt out in
public.
She’s one of those lost little puppies who follow you around no matter
what you say. It really gets annoying after a while.
“Heero,
are you still there?” Oh, yeah, I forgot I was still on the phone.

“Sorry, yeah, I’m still
here.
I just overslept, that’s all.” I’m surprised I’m actually telling
her the truth. I could've told her I was feeling really sick,
almost
bedridden. But then that might give me unwanted attention and
force
me to have people unnecessarily worry over my well-being.

“Oh, I was really
worried.
I thought you might have gotten really sick. I picked up you’re
homework
for you, but I don’t have time to bring it by tonight, so I asked Duo
to
do it, is that okay?” Homework? Duo? She asked Duo to
do wha? . . . Why would she . . . . Duo’s going to
come
over to my apartment? But, I can’t let him see it like this . .
.
The bed is stained with blood . . . there are clothes everywhere
. . . I look like shit.

Wait, I still have a few
hours,
right? I can get it all cleaned up by then, as well as my
arm.....
Which reminds me. It’s really starting to hurt now. Almost
to the point of throbbing. Actually, it’s probably
infected.
But at the moment I don’t care. That little session of thinking I
had last night let me realize a few important things. I think I’m
insane. But, thinking about last night, as much as I think it
helped,
I also think I was wrong to do it. I really do need help, but I'm
too scared to get it...

But I’m going to need to
burn
some incense or buy some frabreeze or air-freshener or something.
My whole room reeks of blood. Maybe I should go grocery shopping
too . . .

Shit Heero. He’s
probably
only going to be coming to you’re door for a few seconds to drop some
papers
and books off, and you want to make everything perfect? Well, to
be quite honest, yes, yes you do.

“Heero? Heero, are
you
sure you’re okay? You keep zoning out . . . If you want I can
come
by later and we can talk . . . Or if it’s some kind of problem
you
don’t think I’d understand, I could ask Duo to stay after he gives you
you’re homework...?” Oh god, just the possibility of Duo staying
in my apartment to talk made my heart skip a beat. Kinda scary. .
. .

“Hn. . . I don’t
know
Relena. I’m really just still a little bit tired.” Probably
due to the loss of blood and dehydration . . .

“Oh well, alright then,
I’m-
oh wait a moment would you, I see Duo,” *Sigh* What am I
getting
myself into? I can hardly understand what their saying . .
.
Relena must have put the hone up to her chest or hand or
something.
Why did she even bother to call? Why are they even bothering to
bring
me my homework? How strange, they’ve never done this before . . .

“Heero?”

Duo. She put Duo on
the
phone. Why didn’t she say anything? Probably because she’s
forcing Duo to get on the phone and talk to me. He probably
doesn’t
even want to walk up here and give me my homework, much more stay and
talk
a while.

“Heero are you still
there?”

Oh yeah the phone . . .
“Yeah
I’m still here.”

“Oh, that’s good, I
thought
you’d hung up for a moment there, or maybe got disconnected.
Relena
did say you were sleeping. Must have been nice to sleep in till
around
noon! *sigh* But after school I’m drop by with you’re
homework,
Relena wanted to do it but she’s busy so I get to! You’ve gotta
be
happy about that, right?”

“Hey!” I do
believe
Relena took that comment to heart.

“Um, sure.”

“. . . Are you still
tired
or somin‘? I’ll make this quick then.” Typical Duo, not
waiting
for my answer. Not that I would have answered. “So far
you’ve
only got two assignments out to the five classes we’ve had, and by the
way, did you know you have like, straight A’s man? I’m lucky to
get
a B in my core classes, shesh! Anyway, I need some help with my
math
homework, so if you’re feeling up to it when I get there, could I stay
and get a lesson with the great Heero Yuy?” Maybe Relena isn’t
forcing
him to do this . . . But I shouldn’t get my hopes up, they’d only
get crushed.

“Sure. But you
don’t
need to check for homework in my last two classes. Ones gym and
the
others Jewelry. I never have homework for either. But
thanks
for checking on my classes for me, Duo.” Well Shit, now he knows
you can’t be too tired. I just hope he doesn’t want to talk a lot
now. I’m wasting time I could be spending on clean my apartment
over.
And get a shower. I didn’t get one last night, the blood on my
arm
proves that. Normally I’ll get my nightly shower after a little
cutting
episode, so I really must have cut deeper than normal for it to have
knocked
me out . . . I better stay home tomorrow just in case. But then
that
leaves me with trying to explain why I overslept one day and then
didn’t
come to school the next. They’d give me wakeup calls if I did
that
two days in a row. But I think I remember hearing that a pint of
blood is restored to the body after 24 hours . . . or maybe it was
48.
where did I hear that any way? I wonder if I lost more than a
pint
of blood last night, I do feel rather light headed . . .
Hopefully
I can stay standing on my own for more than five minuets, much more
clean
my apartment.

“-ok?” Shit, I was
zoning
out while Duo was talking, maybe I did lose a lot more blood than
planned
last night. I suppose I better drink lots of water today.
Yuck.

“Sorry, what was that?”

There was a light chuckle
before
Duo repeated himself. “You really must be tired. I said
that
I though it was weird that you would take a Jewelry class, but then
thought
of all the machinery and fire you get to use so I’m not so
shocked.
And that I’ll be by you’re apartment around 2:40. At the
earliest,
by the way, I have to walk, and school only gets out at 2:20. Is
that ok?”

“Yeah sure. Um, are
you
going to stay for dinner, because if you are I need to go grocery
shopping.”

“Well, If you have to do
that
then why don’t we just go out to dinner, okay? That’ll be fun
after
our lesson, huh?”

“umm, sure.”

“Okay! See you then
Heero,
Lunch is over so I gotta go now, bai!”

“Ja na” *click*

Okay, I only have a few
hours
before Duo gets here, only a few hours to clean my apartment.
Well,
I suppose I should start with the living room, considering that’s the
first
room you see when you walk in here.

Actually my apartment
really
isn’t that much of a mess, it just needs some straightening. I’ll
just have to dust down everything and vacuum. Walking into the
kitchen
was much pretty much the same, wipe down the counter tops and maybe
organize
the fridge. Unload the dish washer too.

Then there was the
bathroom.
I was going to have to spend a little bit more time in there, trying to
scrub clean all the blood stains. Actually, I think maybe I
should
start with the bathroom, than my bedroom, then the living room and
kitchen.
Perhaps Blood stains are more important to remove than your average
everyday
dust bunnies. I have no idea how Duo would react if he knew about
my dirty little secret. I’m not sure I’d want to know.

Well, I suppose I better
get
started with the bathtub/ shower. Getting out the bottle of Comet
from underneath the sink I sprinkled it around the tub while I let it
fill
with water about an inch or so. Scrubbing with blood off of the
porcelain
and tile should be easy, although I think I’ll have to wash the small
rug
I keep in here. Actually, now that I think about it, why do I
have
so much white stuff? My bed sheets were white, my towels and
rugs,
even my carpet, and it was probably all at least speckled with
blood.
Well, no my bed sheets were probably always going to come out of the
wash
a pinkish brown from now on, and my floor mat had red foot prints in it
from when I would cut deeply into my leg and let the blood drip for a
while
as I would often zone out afterwards.

Actually, It’s kind of
fun,
the after experience of the cutting. I mean, the cutting itself
hurts
like hell, but for a few seconds after, right after, I feel absolutely
nothing. I just get so caught up in watching the blood
flow.
Then I usually get caught in my thought flow of 'what ifs'. Then
of course if I’m still awake afterwards I usually get that unpleasant
nervous
anxious feeling. Usually though I try and be asleep by then, I
have
a few bad dreams every once in a while cuz’ of it though.

Well, in my little
thought
I seem to have finished the bathtub and walls. Onto the
sink.
Actually the sink was another think in my apartment that was blood
stained
and white. But once again because of what it was made of, it
would
be fairly easy to clean. taking a look around I counted how many
towels would be left if I took all the bloodied ones out.
7.
I normally have 15 towels, even though I live alone, I just don’t like
washing towels every week. I think I have a spare hand towel to
hang
with the sink, so at least nothing will look suspicious in here.

I’m surprised though,
that
there didn’t seem to be and blood stains on the toilet. normally
the lid has lots of stains from my feet. But then again I suppose
the floor mat took the brunt of that these last few weeks.

Gathering up the towels
and
floor mat I dropped them in a pile in my room only to add my dirty
clothes
and sheets to the pile. getting out new sheets and remaking my
bed
I realized the blood stains really didn’t go all over my room like the
bathroom. But I did have lots of knives, razors, blades, tacks,
needles,
and other sharp objects scatter around my room.

So once my pillows were
in
place on me newly made bed I walked around my room collecting all the
objects
I could find. I didn’t think I had missed any so I walked back
into
the bathroom and pulled out my bottle of disinfectant, and carefully
cleaned
all the blades and knives. Actually, I usually just throw away
the
tacks and needles. They didn’t cause the same kind of pain, I
didn’t
even use them all that often. Maybe as a warm up for something
else,
just running them up and down my arm or leg to get ready, you know?

Finished with that I
realized
while I was here I should probably clean my arm and other various
cuts.
Putting away the disinfectant and grabbing the peroxide I cleaned my
older
and newer cuts alike with it, trying not to wince from the sting.
Bandaging my newest cut that probably actually deserved stitches.

Walking back to my room I
took
off the clothes I had worn to bed and threw them in the pile I had made
in the middle of my room. getting out a long-sleeved dark green
shirt
and some black jeans I got dressed after putting on clean
underwear.
Remembering that Duo had wanted to go out to eat I put some socks
on.
My shoes were by the door and would remain there until I left with
Duo.
I really hope that this goes well and I don’t upset him.

Picking the pile I had
made
up I tried to shove it all into the plastic laundry bin I keep in a
corner
of my room. realizing this wasn’t going to happen, I put all of
my
clothes in the bin and took the eight towels and places them in the
middle
of the two sheets, noticing the huge stain I had made. It had to
be at least a foot and a half. That must have been a lot of blood
. . . Oh well, it too late now to do anything about it.
Tying
the sheets around the towels I shoved it all underneath my bed, up to
the
wall my bed was already pushed up against.

I then spent the next
twenty
minuets dusting and the next fifteen after that vacuuming. Now
came
for the time to clean out my fridge. Opening the door I don’t
know
why I saved this for last. I had three some sodas and some left
over
Chinese food.

Throwing away the boxes
of
leftover food and organizing the sodas I closed the fridge realizing I
was done. Getting out a glass from one of the cabinets I walked
up
to the freezer side of the refrigerator and placed the glass in the
ice/water
dispenser. But now I realized I had forgotten to check this side
of the fridge. Opening the door I realized that was okay because
the only things in here were two boxes of hot pockets, one ham and
cheese
and the other pepperoni. Well, I guess I did have food.
Then
there were three different kinds of popsicles. splash pops, big
sticks,
and lemon ice stuff. What can I say? I like popsicles.

Taking out a splash pop I
poured
myself the glass of ice water I had paused in doing earlier.
Walking
out to the living room I set them both down and got out my school bag
so
that it would be ready when Duo got here. Looking at the clock I
realized I had made pretty good time since it was 2:14 and I’d have
some
time to relax and think about any last minuets things I might need to
get
done.

Actually, now that I
think
about it, I could run down to the laundry room in my building and get
my
towels and sheets done before Duo gets here. So I got up and put
the popsicle back into the freezer, looking at my water.

I really dislike
water.
But I knew I was seriously dehydrated and that wasn't good for going
out
to dinner. So taking a big breath I swallowed the entire glass of
water in one breath. Although I nearly threw up while drinking
it,
I think I’ll throw up now. Running to the bathroom I realized I
was
to the point of dehydration that I really should only sip on water and
suck on ice cubes, as I emptied the water I had just drank back into
the
toilet. Well, maybe I just wont drink or eat much when we go
out.
I just hope I don’t get sick later.

Once my stumach had
settled
back down I got up and walked to my room, emptying my luandry basket
once
again, and refilling it with the towels and sheets. Picking it up
I was once again reminded of the pain in my arm. Angling the
basket
so that most of the weight was on my good arm I walked out of my
apartment
kicking the door closed and walked down to the laundry room. I
didn’t
really have to worry about people seeing me and asking questions
because
everyone else was either working, at school or day-care. The few
people who worked here already knew not to ask their residents
questions,
considering I didn’t live in the best of neighborhoods. Not that
this was a crappie town, just that there was a lot of scummy people
living
here acting like normal everyday people until their door was
closed.
But hey, look at me.

Shoving my laundry into
one
of the washers and putting some soap in I added 50cents into the
machine
and stood there watching for a moment as it started. Surprisingly
enough we didn’t have a very high crime rate in the laundry area, or
any
area really, so I knew it was alright to leave it washing and go back
to
my apartment. Taking the now empty basket with me I walked back
up
to my apartment which was on the third floor.

I didn’t get very far
into
the lobby before some one tapped me on the shoulder. Turning
around
I was met with a familiar face. And a welcome one at that.

“Hey Heero! Relena
offered
me a ride after school so I didn’t have to walk. You ready to
help
me with that homework?”

Duo. Looking around
the
room quickly I scanned it for Relena to see if she had followed him in
and not finding her I smiled slightly at Duo, “Sure, you wanna take the
stairs or the elevator?”

“Um, let’s take the
elevator,
my bags kinda heavy today.”

Walking into the elevator
I
realized I was really worried about nothing. Well, Relena
wise.
I had forgotten that she had given up on me, she was a couple with
Dorothy
now. Dorothy must be happy.

“Hey, since I obviously
caught
you in the middle of laundry how about after you help me out you go
back
down there and finish? You probably don’t want me to see you’re
unddies!”
He winked and smiled as he waited for my answer.

I almost wanted to say
that
I did not have underwear down there but then he might want to come and
I can’t have him seeing my sheet like that now can we? “Um, yeah,
that’s fine.”

Just then the elevator
dinged
and Duo and I walked down the hall to my apartment. He sat down
on
the couch and pulled out his math book grinning at me all the
while.
Maybe this wouldn’t be so nerve-racking after all.

TBC
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Tourniquet