Unexpected

A/N: Aaaaand a sequel, of sorts.

~~~~~~~~~

The door closed with a resounding click behind him, and not for the first time Edward nearly jumped out of his skin. Everything was doing that to him. The rap of his own boots in the hall. The far off murmur of watchmen. There were already wet circles beneath his underarms where he had sweated through his shirt, and the heat was unlikely to start letting up soon.

Two pairs of eyes, one dark and one hazel, and he still wasn’t sure he wasn’t going to bolt.

“You can transmute it shut, if you want to.” The Colonel’s voice was loud in the darkness, making him even more crazily paranoid. What if someone heard?! What if someone saw the lock melt? Tried to turn the handle? He could only imagine what it would be like to be inside and naked, pushing up into that endless slickness, when the doorknob started rattling and someone pounded at the door, oh, what a fright that would be (might possibly make him all the HARDER) -

“Just pull the door behind plaster. That always works.”

Edward shifted uncomfortably, found his voice in the gloom.

“W-won’t somebody NOTICE?”

The colonel flashed teeth, a fanged version of his usual sneer, and tapped his watch chain mockingly.

“Not at eight-thirty. Janitor’s on sick leave; everyone else is at home. We could leave the damn thing unlocked if we wanted.”

He grinned at the First Lieutenant. “We’ve done it before. No one’s noticed yet.”

Edward could not see the way his face blanched, but the First Lieutenant must have, because she turned instantly to the colonel and gave him her business-face, the only threat ever known to make a Mustang bow down and accept his bridle.

“But we will NOT, because it makes some of us – myself included – uncomfortable!” She informed, with a quick nod to Edward. He wasn’t sure whether to be aghast or relieved that he factored in this one-woman mutiny. It implied he was part of this this at all.

But if that bothers me, then why am I here?

“Sir, with all due respect, I believe you are more familiar with the array?” Her words were ever-respectful, but her voice was solid steel.

The colonel looked surprised but graciously consented, even gave her a little bow as he pulled out the chalk.

“Very well, Lieutenant.” The colonel said, but there was a hustle to his step as he hurried to make a large and shaky circle over the door.

He can’t help but do as he’s told. Edward noted in wonder, as if it were the very first time. She says leap, and the COLONEL says frog. Edward had seen this play out hundreds of times before, at the office, but it had never been so potentially useful.

“And Edward.” And her powerful eyes were on him now, too; they were as fierce as the image her name evoked.

“Yes’m.” He said automatically, and her brow crumpled a bit at the honorific. No, he didn’t want to be seeing that – didn’t she know she was supposed to be beautiful?

“Edward, we…I…” She paused, licked her lips ever so slightly. “I suppose you know why we called you out here.”

No, I DON’T know. He trembled, felt the sauna under his coat ratchet up another ten degrees. I only dreamed about, fantasized about it, left my own goddamn BROTHER alone in the lab tonight to come back here on the slightest shred of a chance you might let me…

Please, just let me…

She threw her shoulders back, high and determined, and he had the incredibly sinking feeling that he was going to be running, after all.

“Last week, when we made the decision we made…I want you to know that I wasn’t entirely comfortable with it.”

Nod, silently. What else was there really to say? Not like he hadn’t expected this.

He had trespassed on grounds he didn't belong on (fuck, the smooth, liquid feel of her...her...just HER around him), and it was time to pay the piper.

"I-I understand." He said, inclined his head. He could see it all perfectly. He would turn around, undo the colonel's transmutation (he was sure taking his sweet time about it anyways, could he even had trusted the bastard to follow through on his word to lock it?!), and take a nice, slow walk down the hall. Maybe just as far as the bathroom. Get things back to normal.

He was no stranger to sin. It was indulgence he was unaccostumed to.

The colonel made a querelous noise, but it was the First Lieutenant's voice that made him stop, turn around again.

"Edward!" She said, and AGAIN with the lip-licking.

She's nervous, too. Edward realized in wonder, and he wasn't sure if it made his own hammering heart any more or less shameful.

She tipped her head to him, gave him a remorseful smile.

“I just wanted to apologize for frightening you. The way we handled that was unacceptable.”

What?

The colonel made some sort of indescript placating, and her head whipped to the side to GLARE at him. Edward swallowed hard, tried not to think about what it must feel like to truly be on the other end of her righteous Disapproval.

”I’m so sorry. We never wanted to pressure you into anything. I realize it’s too late to go back on this, but please…if you want to leave right now, we completely understand. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, and if you aren’t ready for this yet then by all means –“

The more she talked, the hotter his face grew.

Oh please, please just SHUT UP. He thought desperately.

"-are you really sure this is what you want, Edward? You can always say no, please don't feel like you have to-"

What was he supposed to TELL her? No, really, I'm perfectly fine with the thought of you two fucking me, that's what I get off to every night, thank you very much, now if you're willing to start sometime before I lose my nerve again...

He seriously WAS going to crawl into a hole somewhere, and die. Before any more decent people had the chance to run into him.

“Edward?” She was asking (and dammit, PLEASE stop sounding like my mother! It's already bad enough!) “Are you okay?”

“Y-yeah.” He lied. “Totally fine.”

Sudden hands curled themselves over his hip bones, and holy fucking shit, he nearly hit the ceiling.

He squirmed around to GLARE at the colonel, half ready to come out swinging. Are you trying to give me a HEART ATTACK, you bastard-!

Stopped himself. He would probably just say something condescending, that bastard, be all snooty like "oh really, Fullmetal, you don't LOOK so fine to me, you're as jittery as a schoolgirl, and oh, are you sweating?" Fucker.

He could hear it so very well in his head, in fact, that he almost entirely missed what the colonel actually said:

"Lieutenant, you're not making this any easier."

She scowled indignantly. "Sir, if I may, Edward has the right to-"

"-not be scared half to death, which is what you are doing right now." His hands left Edward's hips, kneaded soothingly into his back (since when had it gotten so tight?!) and there was no trace of a LOOM at all when he looked down.

"You're fine, aren't you?" He rumbled, and Edward found himself caught by that tone, hypnotized. Yes, yes he was fine. The colonel was such a fucking bastard, but he was a damn nice-looking bastard, and he was right there and warm. Nice smelling. And had the most amazing HANDS, digging right in between his shoulder blades, oh yes, that made him just want to loll his head back and flop over, how could fingers be so goddamn nice-

"You want to be here. You're just nervous." The colonel said, and yes, that was entirely true. Edward nodded his head stupidly as thick palms slid up to squeeze at the base of his neck.

The Lieutenant made a disapproving face, but thankfully, thankfully the colonel's hands didn't stop. He was kneading Edward's scalp into putty now - his whole scalp was tingling, strong fingers raking through his hair - and oh hell, his legs were starting to mirror that, he was really starting to get hard in earnest now.

"After all, I understand." The colonel said, scritching a place behind Edward's ear that he'd never known could make his spine turn to jelly.

"I was fifteen once too, you know."

That leer was back. Okay, no amount of shoulder-petting was enough to be worth THAT.

The colonel looked surprised when he stepped away, but didn't try to hold him back. "You don't have to coddle me, asshole." He said (not entirely stabile, oh wow). "I'm not your pet."

The leer turned into an honestly amused grin. "I wouldn't be touching you like that if you were." Even the First Lieutenant snickered.

"What WOULD you have me do, then?" Dark eyes were suddenly burning, and Edward learned there were ways of igniting things without ever setting a spark to them.

Your hands. He thought with a shiver. Your mouth. I had dreams about them on me, you dick, it was so hot and I couldn't move and you were just everywhere…

"Kissing." He said instead. "I like kissing."

They looked at each other, and Edward winced. Damn, that sounded stupid.

"...if you're sure, Edward." The First Lieutenant said, stepping forward slowly. He gaped yet again. Please, somebody, make her stop ASKING, this is embarrassing enough.

Mercifully, the colonel chose exactly that moment to capture his ear in his mouth, and block out the whole goddamn world.

Ew. That was wet! Edward squirmed uncomfortably at the suction, wondered where the hell the colonel thought he got off kissing him there. That wasn't erotic, it was like a wet willy.

I meant on the LIPS or something, dumbass- He opened his mouth to say, and as he turned, Roy's tongue caught the space behind his ear.

Ohhhh, FUCK. Now THAT was good. Very, very, VERY good. A storm of sensation shot straight down the side of his neck and knocked all the air out of his lungs. The First Lieutenant was at his back all of a sudden, and there were small fingers (reluctantly, but picking up speed) on the other side now. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, FUCK. He whimpered a little, not sure how else to encourage them.

It seemed to work. She was wrapping her arms around his chest now, and bending to nibble on his neck.

"Looks like someone's sensitive." The colonel whispered, extra loud because he was so close to Edward's ear. His breath over spit-moistened skin made Edward want to collapse.

He didn't even care (much) when the bastard started pawing at his clothes. They were too damn hot anyways. The lieutenant (slipping her hands underneath his tank top, oh hell, he was going to DIE) was a welcome contrast to the feverish nightmare of rough cloth. His skin was too sensitive for clothes right now. He needed them off.

More kisses, pressed lower to his collarbone. His chest heaved against all reason as the colonel's tongue grazed his pectorals, the flat of his abdomen, the upper edge of his belly button. It defied all reason. He took bruises there, scarred. How could he feel this so much? He shook hard against the Lieutenant's strong grasp, watched in amazement as the colonel slid lower on his body. He was going to come in his pants, dammit. In his goddamn PANTS.

The First Lieutenant’s hands reached around and twisted over his nipples, and even though it didn’t feel particularly

The First Lieutenant’s hands reached around and twisted over his nipples, and even though it didn’t feel particularly great (not as good as the feel of a tongue skirting his belly button at least, that was enough to make him want to shred his fly open) it was still enough to start his hips bucking wildly.

The colonel caught him hard and smashed his hips back against the First Lieutenant's, dipped a finger beneath the waist of his pants.

"Hold your horses." The colonel commanded...UNSNAPPED A BUTTON. Delirious, Edward almost started to laugh. He wasn't going to come in his pants. He was going to come in Colonel Bastard's face. It wasn't even a question.

The colonel began to peel the leather slowly, slowly down his thighs, and Edward thrashed incoherently, trying to get his arms down to help. The First Lieutenant's arms were in the way, locked underneath his underarms, he couldn't quite reach!

There was a hand on the front of his boxers, and they were so wet in the front that he wondered if maybe he HAD come and just missed it.

"-essssss..." He hissed as the colonel's hand wrapped around his weeping cock - oh FUCK THAT FELT SO GOOD - and his knees buckled forward into the beginning of a thrust he didn't have leverage for. A slim leg pushed forward from behind and slipped between his legs, gave him something to sag against, which was good because the colonel's MOUTH had just opened and SWALLOWED HIM WHOLE.

He did not believe in heaven, but suddenly, he saw the light.

Does he know he just killed me? Edward thought, gasped for air. The crush of hands against his hips made it impossible to move but he needed to so badly. The colonel pulled back, laid frantic kisses along the side of shaft, and it was all he could do not to start wailing.

Tongue, on the tip. His legs jerked in spite of himself, nearly sent him sliding to the floor. His balls spasmed hard but the touch wasn't constant enough to set him off; he tried let the tension go but kept coming up against nothing but air.

"No, no, fuck, you fucking bastard, PLEASE--!" He howled, shuddered, bucked as hard as he could against that maddening touch.

"Colonel!" The Lieutenant's voice came from very far behind him, like a dream. He rolled his eyes up wildly toward her, stared slack-jawed at the little of her he could see.

The colonel looked up too, met her eyes for the moment, opened his mouth and took as much as he physically could.

There was a brief moment of very rough, very moist rubbing, and then something snapped and he was gone. He'd thought nothing could be as good as the feeling of slick woman around him…

But the colonel's lips, pulling over and over until he shattered were at least a close second.

With that tongue, maybe a first.


~~~~~

"How are you?" The First Lieutenant asked, a while while later. He was laying on the floor, curled against her chest, dazed into oblivion, and not particularly feeling like talking about it.

What is it with people and talking. He wondered vaguely, hardly able to keep his damned eyelids open. Wondered also if there was something wrong with that…were you supposed to feel this sleepy? It was never this strong when it was just him and his hand.

There might be one other he could ask, but the colonel didn't seem to be too inclined to answer. He was pressed up against the lieutenant's other side, rubbing desperately against her leg.

"PLEASE, Riza." He whined, pulled up to lip his way along her neck. Edward watched with growing alertness at the way she trembled, slid her eyes shut, licked her lips.

He rolled slowly over her legs to nestle on her other side, let the colonel make forays into her firm breasts. Pressed his own lips to that small space behind an ear.

Yes, no doubt about it - he could most certainly stay awake for this.