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The Spaces In Between	By : ctsama Category: Dragon Ball Z > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1627 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Dragonball, Dragonball Z, Dragonball Super, Resurrection 'F', or Battle of Gods or the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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We’re still training with Whis, about a month before Beerus’ awakening.

Growing Pains

“Hey, Vegeta?”

“What is it this time? If we’re late getting our chores done again Whis is going to call off training for the day.”

“It’s nothing, I was just thinking… You haven’t turned into a Great Ape since you got your tail back, have you?”

Vegeta paused in his task, then finished pulling his boot on. “No. I haven’t.” The truth was that he’d wanted to, but after Gohan’s debilitating attack against him it hadn’t been possible; he’d been far too weak. And once he and Goku had bonded Vegeta had made the difficult decision to give up on ever transforming again. Though Goku didn’t think of it often Vegeta knew that he remained traumatized by his memories of the form and Vegeta blamed himself for his part in that.

His gentle mate had brutally killed the only father he’d ever known while rampaging mindlessly in his Great Ape form as a child. And it was Vegeta’s own transformation that had torn those memories loose. ‘If it weren’t for me he might never have known that pain.’

“Why do you ask?” Vegeta inquired, shaking himself out of his memories. “You’ve been thinking about this on and off for the last few weeks.”

Goku shifted from foot to foot, uncharacteristically agitated though he was trying not to show it. “I was just wondering… Could you?”

Vegeta quirked an eyebrow. “Could I what?”

“Um… Turn into a Great Ape? I wanna see.”

Vegeta frowned. There were places in his mind that Goku couldn’t reach, but the opposite was far from true. Goku was an open book, and the lie might as well have been lit up in neon lights.

Goku didn’t want to see, was almost terrified even as he made the request. Even now his thoughts tumbled as he smiled, trying again not to show his unease. But Vegeta decided to honor his mate’s seeming determination. He would go along with it… for now.

“All right. If you want. And if Whis agrees.”

Clearing it with Whis didn’t take long and the pale master had no problem with them leaving for a while, though he insisted on taking them out of pure curiosity. He even found a highly suitable planet for the occasion. Larger and made of sterner stuff than Earth, it would be difficult to destroy if Vegeta couldn’t keep his ki under control.

The three of them touched down on dark, hard-packed sandy hills. Goku took a deep breath, realizing that the air was different from Earth’s atmosphere, but similar enough not to cause them problems. Vegeta hopped around a bit, acclimating easily to the increased gravity while Whis made himself comfortable at a safe watching distance.

Goku watched Vegeta while trying to psych himself up for this. ‘I can’t believe I finally asked him,’ he thought. He knew how much his heritage meant to Vegeta, could feel that yearning to take on his Great Ape form once more.

He also knew that Vegeta never would. ‘Because of me. And that’s not fair. It’s been a long time, I can do this now. I’m stronger, tougher. It’ll be fine, it’ll be fine-’

“Kakarot,” Vegeta interrupted, his voice softer than it needed to be. “I’m ready. Are you sure about this?”

Vegeta was almost sad when Goku smiled and nodded, but if he was determined to go through with this, maybe it was for the best. Though Bulma had always kept the same general makeup and size-changing properties of his original armor and clothing Vegeta shrugged out of his armor and peeled off his jumpsuit, boots and gloves on a hunch. Then he turned and walked away a few meters, took a deep breath and stared straight into the large moon.

It didn’t take long, less than a minute and he could feel the burning tingle at the base of his tail that heralded the transformation taking hold. Though his vanity found the purely animal nature of the form unappealing to look at, the feeling of it was nothing short of magnificent. He had missed this so much that only his care for Goku could have made him refrain from it. He’d always loved feeling his power increase as he grew. And now with such incredible strength in his base form that power build was staggering. He gave himself over to the sensations for just a moment, roaring in triumph as the transformation completed.

His connection to Goku was the same as it was before and his growing joy was stopped in its tracks by the abject terror he sensed in his mate. Vegeta turned to see that Goku’s already pale skin had lost what color it had, a cold sweat had broken out all over his trembling body and his breathing was out of control. Images of his surrogate father were flashing through his head so fast Vegeta could barely keep up. Goku’s shock at seeing Vegeta turn for the first time, and at learning that he was the one who had murdered Grandpa Gohan boosted his remembered terror to new heights.

Goku’s panic was sadly something Vegeta was intimately familiar with. But at least it meant that he knew how to handle the attack.

Though he was almost ten times larger than he was a few moments ago he moved with ease and incredible control, comfortably at home in this much larger body. Kneeling as low as he could he forced Goku to look into his eyes.

“I killed him,” Goku panted. “I killed him, I killed him, he loved me and I killed him-”

Though those huge, glowing red eyes were those of the monster that had murdered the only father he ever knew, the voice that spoke to his mind was that of that of the greatest love he’d ever known.

//Kakarot. You were a child. His death was not. Your. Fault.//

Vegeta caught Goku against one large hand as he collapsed. Carefully, he sat himself up against a steep hill, taking Goku with him and laying him against his now-furry chest. //Breathe. Through your nose. Just breathe.//

He did as he was told, and finally began to calm after a few moments without knowing why at first. Eventually he figured it out, turning more fully into that surprisingly soft fur and that calming scent. It was still Vegeta, after all. He still smelled the same and he loved Vegeta’s scent.

//Better?//

“Yeah. I’m... I'm fine now.”

//No you aren’t. Kakarot, you have to understand this… Look at it this way. If a human in early childhood fires a weapon and accidentally kills someone, are they punished?//

“Of course not, but-”

//But nothing. You were just a child, the weapon built into your very cells. Mutilating you should never have been an option. Someone should have been there to control you, and to train you until you learned to control yourself. Your Grandfather cared for you, and cared greatly. He did not blame you. He even forgave you. Don’t dishonor him by setting that aside.//

Goku’s fingers played idly in thick fur, twirling it around his index finger. The shock and fear he’d felt at seeing Vegeta like this, seeing the demon from his past no longer intent on killing or wanton destruction bled away for the first time in his life. He smiled to himself, deciding the form suited Vegeta.

“I’m sorry, Vegeta. I really thought I was ready for that. I feel so stupid-”

“Don’t you dare,” that deep voice rumbled pleasantly under him. “Don’t you dare minimize the courage it took to ask me to do that. I won’t hear it. If I hadn’t transformed when I came to Earth you might never have found out… I am sorry for causing you that pain. More than anything I wish I had been here to help you, Kakarot.”

Goku warmed, feeling the frustration and pain his mate felt on his behalf. “You’re here now,” he said, happy once more. “Thank you for doing this for me.” He sighed happily, stretching on his very own soft, warm, giant stuffed animal.

“Stuffed animal, am I?” Vegeta growled, betrayed by the amusement Goku could feel in the thought.

“Yeah, it’d be great to curl up on you on a cold night. We’ll have to do it sometime.” The color of the dark brown fur reminded him of a thought he’d had in passing. “Hey, can you go Super Saiyan like that? Would you turn gold if you could pull it off?”

A low rumble in the chest under his head passed for a thoughtful sound and Goku hopped gleefully up onto Vegeta’s shoulder as he rose to stand. “Only one way to find out.”

Goku watched in delight as Vegeta worked through the process for the first time. With a roar that shook the ground his fur erupted into gold and it was one of the most glorious things Goku had ever seen. “Keep going!” he yelled, and Vegeta turned to give him an aggravated glare.

“You’re going to have to carry me home, you know.”

“No problem! Do it!!”

“By all means, do it!” Whis chimed in. “I chose this planet for a reason: it won’t be easy to destroy. As hard as you two have been working lately I figured you could use a reward. So have at it!”

And after a brief chuckle Vegeta obliged, finding that after a couple of failed tries - to his own surprise - that he could indeed push through to Super Saiyan Blue. The power was incredible. The things he could do, the things he could have done… With power like this no one would have touched him, made a slave of him. He could have crushed Freeza and put his great empire to shame, with power like this, such power…

Though he had never had difficulty keeping his wits in his Great Ape form before, now he was fighting the immense power for control.

Goku felt the struggle, felt the calm within his mate beginning to shake. “Vegeta...?”

The whisper of his name, the almost imperceptible shift of Goku’s hand pulling away from him snapped Vegeta back to himself faster than anything else could have. The thought that he’d frightened Goku again was like a stab to the gut.

“I’m fine, Kakarot. Get off me so I can change back. I have disturbed you enough for one day.”

The shame in the thought hardened Goku’s resolve. “No. No, it’s okay. I’m not afraid anymore. Please, don’t change back, not yet. I want to fight you!”

Vegeta’s deep rumbling chuckle was music to Goku’s ears and he knew he’d never fear this form again.

“If you wish to battle the might of the Great Ape who am I to deny you? Get off my shoulder so we can fight! Or are you going to ride around on me all day?”

A half hour filled with blazing blue streaks of ki, lots of yelling and noise followed. Whis watched them smiling, as their frequent bursts of laughter were contagious. He stopped them every once in a while to repair their battleground but otherwise let them play, and play it was.

The smile faded as Whis thought about the challenges these two would soon face. Beerus would wake soon, and he knew that it was only a matter of time before the god antagonized them into a fight to the finish.

While he was almost certain they would be able to successfully fuse and master the complicated and dangerous techniques that would be essential by that time, Whis had jumped at the chance to give them an alternative, just in case. But as he watched he realized Vegeta had to have known the potential strength in this form all along, but he’d never attempted it before now. Seeing Goku’s reaction told him why, and now he knew that the chance of Vegeta ever using this technique in battle were slim to none simply because he simply refused to risk upsetting Goku.

Whis couldn’t help the flare of frustration that passed through him. Goku and Vegeta both needed to be pursuing every avenue of strength that they could. Counting this incredibly powerful, god ki-infused form out was a foolish, short-sighted decision. It was so unlike Vegeta to tactically hobble himself...

But as a child he’d seen Vegeta foolishly, short-sightedly charge the God of Destruction in an attempt to save his father. At that thought Whis’ frustration passed as quickly as it had come and he smiled to himself. Vegeta’s protective streak wasn’t soft or gentle, but it was as fierce as it was true.

As infuriating as Vegeta’s decision was, Whis couldn’t help feeling hopeful for the future. Vegeta’s soul had very nearly been swallowed by the evils he’d endured in his life. Vegeta had told him more than once that he would have been lost had he not come to Earth when he did…

Had he not met the bright light that had gotten under his skin and begun working on him the day they’d met.

The game paused as Goku - who had just narrowly dodged an unorthodox attack - threw his head back in a throaty laugh. Vegeta’s answering smile had less to do with the moment and more to do with seeing Goku happy, it was a simple thing to see. Goku had been the only thing bright enough to reach Vegeta.

The fight would be over soon. Goku couldn’t keep up with Vegeta’s strength in that Blue Great Ape form and did something neither he nor Vegeta expected. Their eyes both widened as he performed the Kaio-Ken and launched a Kamehameha that he trusted Vegeta to counter or contain as it would have caused utter devastation to the solar system - at the very least - if left unchecked. Vegeta’s surprise gave way to an intense excitement as he countered with an attack of his own leading to an explosion that only damaged the planet and left two bruised and bloodied Saiyans lying barely conscious on the ruined ground.

After repairing the damage to the planet it was Whis who ended up carrying both his students home, and none of them could have been happier with the outcome of the day’s events.

Whis brought his staff to bear, encircling them both in a shield bubble and floating them off the ground. He blew a puff of air and smiled at his troublesome, spirited charges. “Goku, remind me to thank you later for refusing to grow your tail once more. All my free time would be lost to repairing your playgrounds.”

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ZeoViolet: Oh no! I’m sorry you’ve been sick. I hope you start feeling better before the holidays!
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The Spaces In Between