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Atavism	By : ctsama Category: Dragon Ball Z > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 9192 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 3
Disclaimer: I do not own Dragonball, Dragonball Z, Dragonball Super, Resurrection 'F', or Battle of Gods or the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Sow the Wind

The terrible dream had come from an equally terrible memory and Vegeta shuddered in the aftermath of it as Goku slept on, unaware. He breathed a sigh of relief at that. He hadn’t been able to tell his mate the whole of what Freeza had done to him. Goku could have forced it out of him and he had offered to let him do it. However, the memories were buried so deeply pulling it out of him would have been a violent and painful process and his gentle mate hadn’t been willing to subject him to it.

A familiar warmth in his body and a slippery feeling between his legs told him he’d passed into heat sometime during the night. Vegeta spared a moment, just long enough to ensure their coupling wouldn’t prove fruitful before he reached for Goku, desperate to use their bodies to chase away the ghosts in his mind. “Kakarot?” //Kakarot. Wake up.//

Goku woke quickly, already affected by the change in his mate. He sensed there was something more to it than the usual demanding need that accompanied his heat and held back the growing, frenzied lust building in him. “Vegeta? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I just... need you.”

Goku frowned, not believing Vegeta for a second but knowing he needed more than words right now. Intent on erasing Vegeta’s troubling thoughts - whatever they were - from his mind at least temporarily, Goku rolled on top of Vegeta, between thighs that parted only for him and drove in deeply. He moaned, shuddering deeply as that tight, slick heat enveloped him inch by inch. Vegeta’s arms flew around his shoulders and back, crying out and clinging to Goku as he rode the warm, eager body beneath him.

It took nearly an hour to both sate their desires and banish the nightmare. They held each other, Goku’s hand lightly stroking the skin of Vegeta’s back. Do you want to talk about it?

//It was just a bad dream.//

Vegeta…

“Shh. Go back to sleep.”

Goku wanted to push but Vegeta began running his hand through his hair in that way that melted the few remaining muscles their lovemaking hadn’t drained of their energy. Soon he was asleep again, and Vegeta sighed deeply, following him into the darkness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Walk in. Strip naked. Take the collar and put it on. Lay on the bed. Jerk off. Remove the collar. Re-clothe. Leave.

It was all he had to do.

The hard, cold metal of the floor seemed to absorb the chill of space, only to transmit it through his skin and into his body as he was pressed against it. He hated being ground into that floor.

But then, that was the point.

He couldn’t tell what was choking him, Freeza’s sharp tail stabbing down his throat or Freeza pulling the leash so hard the collar was taut against his airway. Either way he would have welcomed the darkness of either, if only Freeza wasn’t so circumspect in keeping him conscious. Freeza’s cock in his ass stabbed into him, over and over, tearing soft flesh as it went.

He wanted to scream. Could have screamed if he’d had the air for it, as Freeza loved to remind him, the room was completely soundproof. But Freeza had made it clear he wanted his voice, wanted to hear the agony he was inflicting.

The thought strengthened his resolve even further. Freeza would not get it.

The copper tang of blood reached his tongue courtesy of the violent action of that sharp tail stabbing into things that weren’t designed to be touched. He would be at least a day in the healing tank. Freeza didn’t want his favorite pet scarred from these sessions, outside or in. There would be no scar tissue, no loss of sensation for him.

All because he had chosen not to obey. It had happened before and it would happen again because he would never obey, not here. Never here. He refused even the pretense of obedience here.

Freeza spasmed and released inside him with a harsh grunt. Their species weren’t entirely compatible it seemed; something about his seed was too acidic even for hardy Saiyan flesh. It burned, every time. He felt sick as well, every time.

But he hadn’t taken the easy way out. It was worth it.

Freeza yanked painfully out of him and the collar pulled even tighter as Freeza used it to drag him over to the bed, chuckling in insufferable amusement to himself as he went. He swung the leash around, propelling his favored pet onto the silky sheets. Freeza was on top of him, still chuckling before he could get up.

He struggled even though he knew Freeza was simply allowing it. The pain lancing up his spine as he tried in vain to throw Freeza off of him was a familiar agony, but an agony nonetheless. It was always strange fighting on those nearly frictionless sheets. He hated those sheets, so white and perfect until Freeza spilled his blood on them.

It helped him sleep, or so the tyrant said.

Finally that tail - still smeared with his blood - snaked around his wrists and pinned them to the bed. He tried to kick that hated smirk but Freeza just grasped his ankles and forced his legs apart before pushing his way between them.

The monster released his ankles to lean low. One hand caressed its way down the small of his back to the curve of his ass, pulling to expose his already bleeding orifice. Freeza’s cool breath was against his ear, amused as always. “There is no more blissful lullabye than the blood of the conquered. And whether you want to admit it or not, I have conquered you my beautiful pet.”

That long shaft penetrated him too deeply and he fought successfully against the scream that threatened to erupt. The collar went taut again underneath his body, forcing his head so far back he could barely breathe. He ached to claw at it as Freeza speared into him and more blood ran down his thighs, soaking into the sheets.

“Deny me the pleasure of hearing you scream, Vegeta. I do so love your blood, and I will have that.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vegeta woke, gasping and clawing gouges into his throat. It didn’t feel like a recollection or even a bad dream. It felt like it had just happened.

He rolled out of bed, still struggling for breath as he stumbled his way out of their rooms, down the hallway to the large bathing room and plunged himself underneath the warm waters of the baths. He powered up and the water began to boil and vaporize, burning his skin as he needed it to burn, Freeza’s hands were always so cool. It wasn’t enough to cleanse the filth clinging to his soul, it would never be enough and he screamed under the water, bubbles breaching the surface. Even as he felt his skin blistering and his lungs burning from lack of air he stayed as he was.

Suddenly hands closed around his arms and hauled him out of the now half-empty pool. He struggled against them blindly. “Never again,” he gasped, beginning to power up further.

It’s me Vegeta, power down! You’re safe!

He snapped out of it immediately, releasing all his gathered power to find Goku and Whis holding his arms tightly. The room was hot and so full of steam he could barely see them and he hissed, beginning to feel the pain from his burned skin.

Whis stared in horror at the injured flesh under his hands.

“Oh gods,” Goku breathed. “Whis, please! Do something!” Whis shook himself, finally released Vegeta’s arm and called his staff to his hand, striking it against the floor and resetting the room and Vegeta’s body both back to rights. Goku immediately dragged his wet body into his lap, holding him tightly. “What the hell was that, Vegeta?!”

“I don’t know, I don’t know,” he said shakily, leaning forward to rest his head against Goku’s chest.

“Please tell me that was just a dream!” He winced; this was the first Goku had seen of the humiliation he’d suffered at Freeza’s hands, and worse, the fact that he had chosen it.

Vegeta swallowed hard, and still it took a few moments before he was able to admit the truth. //I… never really wanted you to see that.//

“I’m sorry,” Goku said, pulling his mate close. “Oh gods, Vegeta… I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“Why was it so real,” Vegeta ground out, drawing strength from Goku’s presence. “I’m no stranger to nightmares but these…” he trailed

Goku saw Whis’ hand moving toward Vegeta’s shoulder too late to warn him, but as it made contact, resting lightly on his shoulder Vegeta didn’t startle, didn’t seem to mind at all, surprising Goku. More than anything he seemed to be reassuring himself that Vegeta was indeed all right, in body at least.

“Vegeta?” There was something in that lilting voice that made Vegeta turn his head from the comfort of Goku’s chest. He was in a brightly colored housecoat, and its cheerfulness clashed with the pain in the lavender eyes. “It was Freeza, wasn’t it?”

Vegeta hesitated, finding that a brief nod was all he could give.

“What did he do to you?”

He finally looked away. “Nothing of consequence,” he said harshly. “It was a long time ago.”

Whis smiled sadly. “It’s been a long time since you’ve lied to me.”

Vegeta’s temper flared. “Everyone involved is dead and rotting. Why must I tell of my shame now?”

“I wouldn’t ask if it weren’t important. Please.”

Vegeta? Did that jar it loose? Can you tell him?

//...Yes. I can now. I just don’t particularly fucking want to, Kakarot.//

Do it anyway. There’s something to these dreams, I can feel it.

//You were jealous. You still are. Are you sure you can handle me confiding in someone else something I would only trust to you?//

I’ll… get over it. Let him help you.

Vegeta’s fists clenched in anger. “Fine. Gods-dammit… He called me… his pet. And that’s how he preferred to treat me. There was a collar and a leash, and…” He stopped, shook his head. “He wanted me to put them on and… perform for him. If I had given in and done what he wanted he said he wouldn’t touch me. But all I had was my pride and I could not give in to him so I… never gave him a chance to prove it. It happened this way… several times.”

He took a deep, shuddering breath before admitting to the worst of it. He’d been drawing away from Goku without realizing it, both physically and mentally, preparing himself for disgust. He wanted to at least look him in the eye but found he couldn’t even accomplish that small feat. “That is my shame. It was my choice, you understand? What he did to me was my decision.”

The depth of his own outrage surprised Whis. Such overconfidence, such unforgivable arrogance. In creating such incredible adversity in such an adaptable race as the Saiyans Beerus had inadvertently turned their entire gene pool into a crucible, leaving only the strongest and most useful traits in a race of natural warriors. And Freeza had indeed followed in the footsteps of his mentor, chaining this force of nature, calling it ‘pet’ and abusing it, never really believing it would ever learn its true power. “The shame was his, not yours. Never yours.”

Goku’s wholehearted agreement filled Vegeta’s mind. What the hell kind of choice is that? It was just another one of Freeza’s mind games. He knew you would never choose to comply, he never even wanted it.

Though he could not act on his own Whis would see an end to the cycle, starting with Freeza for Vegeta’s sake. “Your senses are stronger than you know. By forcing such close physical contact on you Freeza would have left an impression on your mind without even forming a bond. You’re resonating; if he’s thinking about you hard enough you’re going to sense it on some level.”

“It’s not possible. He’s in hell where he belongs,” Vegeta snarled.

“But what if he’s not,” Goku whispered, trying not to vomit over the thought of Freeza replaying those particular memories and why he was doing it. “The Dragon Balls. Freeza’s men knew about them. Vegeta, he could be alive again.”

“My son put an end to him. It’s not possible.”

“Yes, it is. He’s come back to haunt us before. There’s only one way to really find out.”

Despite the apologetic sympathy pouring off his mate Vegeta shuddered in revulsion until Goku’s arm tightened around him. //I’m right here with you. I can pull you back if you get lost.//

You might have to.

Casting his consciousness into the fading horror from his dream was terrifying, but Vegeta did it because he was the only one who could. He closed his eyes and his body went slack in Goku’s arms. He followed the link across the light years, across the galaxies to find its source. It took every ounce of his dogged focus to fight through the crawling, unclean feeling invading him that only increased the closer he got to his target.

The closer he got to Earth.

A glimpse of the ship and that familiar, distinctive power signature were more than enough information and Vegeta clawed his way back to his body as fast as he could before he was suffocated by the darkness. Goku’s bright presence gave him the anchor he needed to pull himself back.

His body jolted as his consciousness took up residence in it again and Vegeta judged its boundaries by the arms that still held it tightly. “Fuck,” he moaned shakily. His fingers itched to scrub himself again but it never truly helped, doubly so now that the dirty feeling was inside his mind. “You were right. He’s alive and on a ship headed for Earth,” he said breathlessly. “He’s close, we don’t have much time.”

“I could get you there but it would take longer than you want to wait I’m sure. Goku?”

Goku only shrugged. “Don’t look at me. I can’t Transmit that far without a really big target. We could get Goten or Trunks to power up, but…”

He looked to Vegeta, who snorted. “With scouter tech they might as well be standing there yelling ‘come and get me, Freeza.’ Forget it, right now we have surprise on our side and I’d like to keep it that way. I’ve got a strong enough link to the children. I can target one of them, it’s no problem,” Vegeta huffed, impatient to get moving. “Now let’s go.”

“Vegeta, this isn’t safe. You’re on a low swing but you’re still in heat. We don’t know if Freeza can-”

Vegeta’s gaze darkened. “It’s a risk we’ll have to take. Don’t you even think about leaving me here, Kakarot. I’m no longer as helpless as I was when we arrived here, I don’t need protecting.”

It was true, both of them had seen an immense rise in strength. Their time spent in this relative solitude learning and training with Whis had done much to restore Vegeta, and not just in body. At times Goku thought that the man he held in his arms had more in common with the Vegeta that would have existed were it not for the cruelties of this universe than the Vegeta who had invaded Earth so long ago.

This Vegeta had let go of the thoughts of a former slave. He no longer felt he had to continually prove he was no longer an unwilling captive, no longer under anyone’s control. Now he simply allowed himself to be free.

Goku’s hands pressed against him, holding him when he would have risen. “I know better than to try to keep you out of a fight. But hang on a minute.” Goku met Whis’ eyes briefly and their teacher nodded and quietly left them alone. “You’ve got that feeling again and it’s really bad this time. I know,” he said before Vegeta could protest. “I know we don’t have enough time to deal with it properly, but is there anything that will make this easier?”

Vegeta grimaced. Goku had ably demonstrated on a few occasions that he could burn even the worst anxiety out of him in any number of mind-shatteringly pleasurable ways, but the kind of intimacy it required would only trigger a quickening in his heat. “Not without knocking me out of this low swing. And if that happens neither one of us are going to care what Freeza’s up to. Now stop nagging me and come on,” Vegeta said, shrugging out of Goku’s embrace and standing up. “I need to let the boys know what’s going on so they can pass it on, and I’d prefer to be clothed for the festivities.”

Goku smiled slightly, grateful for Whis enabling them to at least get the hang of merging. Thanks to that he could easily unpack everything behind Vegeta’s harshness; it usually just meant he was uneasy with something he was feeling. “After we deal with Freeza I’m taking care of you. Everything else is going to have to wait.”

Vegeta turned and strode toward the doors, still uncomfortable with how much Goku cared, and even more uncomfortable with how badly he wanted what Goku was offering. “Hn. Do what you want,” he mumbled. Goku followed behind him, grinning all the way.

I actually give a damn, Vegeta. You’ll get used to it someday.

______________________________________________________________________________
The ship was on a slow approach, just passing inside the moon’s orbit when Vegeta and Goku appeared on Earth for the first time in two years. They could feel Trunks and Goten’s eyes on their backs but didn’t turn to acknowledge them yet.

“There are at least a thousand soldiers on that ship,” Vegeta said. “We can let them land and fight them there or shoot it down now. They won’t be expecting that; we’d only have Freeza and a few survivors to deal with. You know my preference.”

Goku took a deep breath. There was a time he would have argued for the lives of Freeza’s soldiers, but Vegeta’s pragmatism rose within him. “They didn’t come all the way back here to shake hands and make friends. They’ve come to our home to kill us and destroy everything we love.”

“A beam hitting the engines full on will cause the ship to explode. Its armor is designed to keep that from happening but… we’re not exactly standard weaponry. Kakarot…” //You have nothing to prove to me. I’ll take this if-//

No. As much as it used to piss me off, I’ve always known you were there to deal a deathblow if it needed to be done and I couldn’t do it. It… wasn’t fair to you. You aren’t the only one who worries about being a burden; I have something to prove to myself.

Vegeta’s hard gaze softened and Goku smiled to feel Vegeta’s tail curling a meaningful caress around his leg. As much as he was loathe to let Goku do this with him Vegeta knew it would be a small taste of what they would be doing en masse if they were able to defeat Beerus. He needed to see how his mate would handle this. //Together then.//

They both lifted a hand, a ki blast from each was enough to accomplish the goal, the ship exploded just out of reach of the upper atmosphere. A few pods launched, but not enough to worry about.

“Freeza survived. He’s not moving yet - probably trying to figure out what the hell happened. But he’ll be headed for us as soon as he realizes we know he’s here.”

“Good. Let him come to us,” Vegeta answered, though his knew Goku’s mind was only partly on the words as he waited for debris to begin lighting up the atmosphere.

There was no telling how many lives they’d potentially saved by blowing up the ship; Freeza’s soldiers tended to enjoy destroying whatever and whoever they came across on their way to their objectives. And if Freeza had located the children, all the worse. While their children were powerful the younger ones were too young to take on a trained force that large. It had been the right thing to do.

But it didn’t feel good.

Goku felt Vegeta’s sure touch then, comforting and steady where his wavered and he drew strength from it. //Killing like this isn’t supposed to feel good. It’s simply necessary.//

What if someday… it does start to feel good to me?

Vegeta could feel the terror in the thought and quickly moved to soothe it the only way he knew how. //Kakarot, you’re… you. If being bound to me hasn’t blackened your soul nothing will. But if it ever does, if you ever begin to delight in the taking of life I swear I’ll kill you myself. You have my word.//

He felt Goku both calm and startle at the same time and an amused grunt escaped him before he answered the cause of Goku’s shock. //I have lived in a world without you once. Even if I could, I would never willingly do so again.//

It was always interesting to Vegeta, the ability to actually feel both Goku’s smiles and all the joy behind them. It had been that way since before he even knew what sent those random waves of amusement through him. Since Goku was generally a ridiculously happy person he couldn’t remember them all.

But this was one he would remember no matter how long they lived.

Vegeta, this… I admit it, if I’m having trouble with this, I’m in over my head. You told me once that you’re broken and I’m not. Well, this is your domain. I’m still sure about taking down Beerus and taking his place, but as for what comes after… I’ll follow your lead.

As he turned to gape at Goku in astonishment Vegeta’s arms fell to his sides as Goku’s words stomped up and down on one of his greatest fears. //This sounds like one of your short-sighted, hare-brained, naive ideas to me. You’re talking about trusting the integrity of a pure soul to an impure one.//

Goku beamed back at him, warmed by Vegeta’s concern for him. You always say you don’t know how to care for me, but that’s all you’ve done for a long time. You’ve protected me, pushed me and watched my back, and we both know I’m just asking you to do what you would have done in the first place.

Vegeta started in surprise, tried to look away but Goku wouldn’t let him, catching his chin in his hand.

“I knew it,” Goku said with a small smile. “You know me. And I know you won’t let me do anything I can’t come back from.”

“I…” //I will not fail you.//

Two loudly clearing throats finally broke through their focus. They turned to see two overeager boys barely able to contain their excitement anymore. “Now?” Goten asked with a sunny smile.

Goku returned the smile and a second later he had an armful of laughing Goten, spinning him in circles before finally putting him down to scrutinize him. “You two have gotten so tall!”

Trunks approached his own father with more reservation but no less enthusiasm. “Hey Dad! I’m glad you’re back! You haven’t forgotten your promise to train me first, have you?”

“Of course not,” Vegeta snorted. “You’ve… grown stronger. Well done.”

Goku groaned, having had quite enough of this stunted reunion. He knew full well Vegeta was capable of showing affection, he just had no idea when it was warranted or appropriate. Gentleness had had no place in his life, so he’d just never learned. Vegeta. For crying out loud, just hug him.

Goku expected a snarky comment or some pushback, and was pleasantly surprised when Vegeta just opened his arms with minimal hesitation and his son flew into them with his bright laugh. The hug was brief but heartfelt. “Talking up here is nice,” Trunks said, tapping the side of Vegeta’s head. “But this is much better!”

“I suppose so, brat. I suppose so.” Vegeta frowned when he realized Trunks was still happily bouncing around, switching dads with Goten.

Goku noticed as they each hugged their adopted sons. What’s wrong?

//Trunks is still conscious. Before now whenever I was in heat he just passed out on me.//

He’s older now. Maybe he’s outgrown the effect?

//...Probably. Which means if Goten hasn’t started picking it up yet, he will soon. You’ll have to talk to him.//

Goku cringed at the thought of having to have a ‘sex’ talk with his son. That alone would have been bad enough, now he had to explain why he suddenly had the hots for his other dad.

“Brats!” Vegeta barked. “I have a job for you.”

“All right! Do we get to fight?” Trunks asked with a grin.

“Of course,” Vegeta snorted. “We took out the ship carrying Freeza and his soldiers but there were survivors. You should be able to handle them easily. Find them and subdue them, and keep score, I want to know who takes down the most soldiers. Stay together and don’t let any of them slip through your fingers or I’m not teaching either one of you a thing. Now go!”

The boys rocketed off into the sky without another word, eager to show their fathers how capable they were. “I have to admit, I’m a little jealous. Goten never listens to me that well.”

“Well every time I spoke to mine when we were with Whis he never shut up about you. Let’s just switch sons. Yours is far more level-headed than mine.”

“Deal. Trunks is way more fun!” The unmistakable surge of Transmission interrupted and pulled their attention. Goku took a step closer to Vegeta as he turned to face the newcomer.

His eldest had changed.

Gone was the lean, trim body of academic whose priorities had so frustrated his pure warrior father. The muscular physique Gohan had gained over their time away spoke of intensive training, and indeed he presented to his and Vegeta’s ki sense as far stronger than they thought he could ever be again after Vegeta had taken away that ancient, out of control strength. Dressed once more in the outfit Piccolo had gifted him as a child he was an imposing figure, one that Goku had once wished him to be more than anything.

“Dad. It’s been a while,” he said with that familiar unassuming smile. Goku realized he hadn’t seen it since the day of his birthday bash so long ago.

Goku almost returned it automatically, but his emotions roiled as that face that he knew so well shifted from that beloved smile to the bared, snarling roar he’d seen on that face as he’d brutally raped his mate. He took another involuntary step toward Vegeta but at a reassuring mental touch from Vegeta stopped short of putting himself between the two of them.

//I am no longer weak. And he is no longer what he was when he attacked me. Can’t you feel it?//

The kind of confidence and control Gohan radiated now could only have come from acceptance. Of what he had done, of what he was. For some reason, the thought didn’t make Goku rest any easier. “Gohan. Did Trunks tell you what was happening?”

“Yes, and I can’t quite believe it. Freeza? After all this time?”

“Well, at least we had warning. Vegeta felt him coming.”

“That’s good news at least.” Gohan’s eyes left Goku’s, sliding to Vegeta and that smile softened. “It’s good to see you again.” Vegeta watched him, reminding himself that of the likely two beings in the universe powerful enough to touch him if he didn’t want to be touched, Gohan was not one of them. Hearing their tangled history from Oracle had changed things for him. Though forgetting was impossible and foolish, he resolved to at least try to forgive, though admittedly it wasn’t something he had much practice with. Goku did, but his own issues weren’t allowing him to be of much help.

Beside him he felt Goku tense at the barely concealed longing in his son’s gaze. Gohan must have realized he was revealing too much. “It’s good to see both of you,” he added hastily.

As he shifted, scratched the back of his head uncomfortably Goku once again saw the kind and endearing son he’d known. Vegeta’s voice startled him.

//We have a few minutes. Go talk to him.//

What am I supposed to say, Vegeta?

//I don’t know. But he’s your son and this is tearing you apart. Every muscle in your body is tense right now, and that is far from normal for you. You’ll have to find a way to get past what he… did to me. He’s a victim in this, same as I am. Beerus’ tampering made him what he is.//

Goku took a slow breath. Vegeta was right. Of course he was, and of the two of them Vegeta had far more reason to hate his son than he did, but… He knew what Gohan had done to Vegeta, he knew all of it, not just the physical pain of the attacks but the brutality of it, the devastation of being taken apart by someone he’d trusted as far as he ever trusted anyone. He’d felt Vegeta’s pain, his despair, felt him getting weaker and weaker as time went on - as he was slowly dying. And had done…

Nothing. He’d done nothing at all. Because he’d trusted in his son who he’d never really understood, and not in his mate who he knew better than he knew himself.

It occurred to Goku, and not for the first time, that maybe it wasn’t Gohan he couldn’t forgive. It was himself. You’re not having an easy time of this either.

Vegeta had too much control to shudder, but his arms crossed against his chest a little tighter. //How could I? At least I’m trying.//

Piccolo, Tenshinhan and Krillin were close and closing fast and Vegeta took the opportunity to enforce his will. “I will fill in the newcomers. If you’ll excuse me.” Without another word he lifted off and flew away, closing himself off from all but a mental shout from Goku to give them some privacy.

What followed for almost a full minute was the most intensely uncomfortable silence either Son had endured in either of their lives as they both tried to think of something to say. Finally Gohan just sighed heavily, his hands forming fists at his sides as he worked to push the words out.

“Listen, Dad… I know I didn’t just hurt Vegeta, I hurt you too. I lied to you and you believed me. What I did to him… that’s on me. You’re not responsible.”

“But I am!” Goku yelled, surprising them both. “I heard him calling for me, begging me to help him. I heard him and I ignored him. Gods help me, for a while I was even glad he was hurting because you made me believe he’d betrayed me.”

“I made you fail him,” Gohan said softly. “And I’m sorry for that, and for so much more. I can’t change what I did, but I’m determined to do whatever I can to make thing better.”

“You still…”

Gohan smiled sadly. “Of course I still love him, Dad. But that doesn’t much matter.”

“You tried to take him away from me,” Goku said quietly, and Gohan heard the pain in his voice, so much pain.

“And I won’t ever do it again.”

Goku tried to accept it. Tried and failed. “Then why are you trying so hard? All the training, the pledge you gave to him... Why can’t you just stay away from him?”

Gohan sighed, looking up at the blue sky as the remains of Freeza’s ship began making shooting stars through the air. “I could give you the noble reasoning. That I don’t want the shadow of my actions to hang over him the way Zarbon, Ginyu and Freeza’s have. It’s more selfish than that though. I can live with him not loving me back - as long as he’s happy. But I can’t live with the knowledge that hates me, or worse, that he’s afraid of me. I just can’t Dad, so please don’t ask me to.”

He wanted to ask him to stay away from Vegeta. Order it, and enforce that order however he needed to; his own fears and insecurities were screaming for that course of action. Instead he took a deep breath and pushed through his tangled feelings, remembering Vegeta’s words. “I guess… I understand. How’s Videl with how you feel?”

“Pissed. At least until Bulma and Chi-Chi sat her down and talked to her and laid a few things out. Mom tried to make you into something you weren’t and everything fell apart. Bulma and Vegeta let each other be who they were and they’re good friends, but nothing more.”

“...And?”

“And… she chose something more in the middle. She has every bit of me that’s human. She decided that’s enough, and I love her even more for that.”

“That’s good to hear, surprising though. What about Pan?”

Gohan finally laughed. “Fast. And very stubborn! She’s getting stronger by the day. You’d be proud.”

Goku had gotten so distracted by the reunion that Vegeta’s touch startled him.

//Kakarot, incoming!//

He bit off a quick curse, deflecting a strong energy blast a millisecond before it could hit him and Gohan. He felt Vegeta’s counterattack leave him at the same time, forcing Freeza to abandon his hover chair.

Piccolo, Tenshinhan and Krillin landed beside Gohan as they watched Goku and Vegeta face off against Freeza.

“If that was your idea of a warm welcome Vegeta, I didn’t much care for it. And here I was hoping for flowers and candy. Well, you did bring me Goku. Killing him will be gift enough.”

Goku looked to Vegeta with a grin and Vegeta rolled his eyes. “Rock, paper, scissors?”

It was a familiar pattern and Goku almost fell into it, but stopped himself. Things had to change. When Vegeta thought of Freeza even after all this time there was fear in it. He didn’t know it, but it was there.

“No. Either we do this together or you take it. What do you want to do?”

Vegeta looked to the powerful alien that had enslaved him, destroyed his people and tormented him for years.

“I’ll take it,” Vegeta said walking calmly toward where Freeza stood waiting.

Piccolo stepped up beside Goku in concern. “Are you sure you want to let him do this? I can sense a lot more power rolling off Freeza than before, and he’s still not showing it all.”

“Neither is Vegeta,” Goku said with a smile.

***************************************************************************************************************
I’ll have to do RR in a few days, right now I’ve gotta go help with some July 4th fireworks!

Next up: The battle with Freeza.
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Atavism