There are two kinds of blindness

Chapter two;


To be, or not to be blind

The sun was shining through the window blinds, something else the young Chinese agent wasn’t able to see. Not even the shadows the light played with reached through the thick bandages.

He had been living in an empty darkness for almost a month now.

One whole month of tensing up as soon as somebody entered his small room. A whole month spent living in fear... A soldier was nothing without his sight, nothing but a liability to the rest.

Why couldn’t they have killed him instead? To die was a fate much more humane than to be sent into darkness for the rest of your life.

For the rest of his life.

Wufei turned his face to the place he knew the door was. Dr Grant had said that they were going to take of his bandages today. But not even a nurse had come to visit him so far.

A kind nurse had given him two more pillows the day before. It was the only thing that made it even possible for him to sit up without screaming in pain. He still felt it sting through his back, but the pain came nowhere near what he felt before he made his mountain of pillows for his back.

He could even understand why... Why Maxwell always did so during the war when he had the chance for that. It was quite comfortable.

Though he tried to keep his mind occupied with anything else but the fact that he might not be able to see today at all.. But there were even more painful memories that he tried to force out. The other fellow gundam pilots were one of them.

He didn’t wan’t to hope, he didn’t want to be disappointed when the blinds fell off and not even a glimmer of light dared to touch his eyes. He didn’t want to wish that the doctors were right. That he would be able to see again.

He didn’t dare...

What if they were wrong?

What if the operation hadn’t helped?

What if he...

Everything he had ever wished for had been ripped from his hands. Right in front of his eyes. His wife, his colony, his honor.. his pride....

And now this?!

The beauty of colors was the only pure thing he had left...

If he was never to see again... he wouldn’t be able to hold himself together anymore. He wouldn’t be able to live...

An old man passed through the door with a soft knock.
“Ah, Wufei how are we feeling today? Exited?”

Wufei had, as usual, tensed the moment he heard somebody touch the door handle, but as soon as the familiar tenderness of the old Japanese man’s voice.

“Not exited?” He chuckled. “Nervous then?”

After a moment of hesitation Wufei nodded.
“Oh, you shouldn’t be!” The man said with a smile. “The odds are on your side. You will be able to see again in no time!”
“Dr Kolya, please.” Another voice made itself known. A voice with a french dialect that could only belong to one man.
“Richard, how nice of you to join us.”
“He is my patient. Of course I would be here now!”

The French doctor moved to stand beside the young agent.

“How is your back?” He asked as he placed a hand over Wufei’s shoulder.

Hurts...

Still, he didn’t admit that. Instead he lifted his hand. Giving te doctor a ‘thumbs up’, saying ‘My back isn’t bothering me at all anymore’.

“Oh! That is great!” Dr Kolya smiled in delight.
“Really?” The French man said sceptically, pushing Wufei’s back off the pillowed mountain he had build.

Wufei winced in pain.

“So then this doesn’t hurt at all?” He sighed and let the Chinese youth gently back against the pillows. “Wufei, you have to stop pretend that everything is fine. One day somebody might believe you.”

He left Wufei’s side for a minute, to prepare for their ‘mission’.

“Now, shall we see if your eyes are doing any better than that back of yours?”

Reluctantly Wufei nodded.

“Kolya, please turn off the light.”
“Of course.”
“It’s because your eyes aren’t used to the exposure, too much light might damage them.” Dr Grant said to answer Wufei’s sudden worry. “You are lucky. There’s a 80 percents chance that, no.. you have a chance over 80 percents that there are no damages what so ever left.” He smiled. “We don’t want to ruin that, do we?”

Dr Grant smiled even more so gently when the young Asian shook his head.

“Don’t open your eyes until I tell you to. Okay?”

Wufei wasn’t given the chance to nod in understanding before he felt the warmth from the doctor’s large hands through the bandages.

Soon it wouldn’t be so dark anymore.

Soon he would be able to smile at the sun’s warmth as it lay on his face.

Soon.

“It’s a shame that Mr Marquise couldn’t be here today.” Dr Kolya said, drawing Wufei back from his thoughts.

It’s a shame that Mr Marquise couldn’t be here?!

“He couldn’t sneak away from work.” Dr Kolya didn’t really tell the truth. The truth was that Zechs had made it very clear that he wouldn’t come even if his small love was lying on his deathbed.

But they had promised Une that they wouldn’t interfere unless it was a matter of survival.

Wufei shook his head. That didn’t sound right at all.. Why would Zechs even want to be there?! It would be a waste of time on his side.

“Ng.. nn... ..no..”

“Wufei, please be still. Mr Marquise,”

Wufei shook his head again. They still didn’t understand! What the hell had Zechs told them?!

I don’t need him to be here!

“Wufei...” Kolya started. “I know how hard this must be for you, but the ones we love can’t always be by our sides. Even at times like this.”

This time Wufei’s chin dropped. He shook his head violently, shaking parts of the bandages off.

I will KILL him!

“Wufei!” Dr Grant said firmly. “Wufei, please calm down.” He placed his hands on each side of the young Chinese’s cheeks. Forcing him to still his head. “If you want us to call his superior I think we might get him to-”

Wufei shook his head as much as the doctor’s hands let him.

“You don’t want us to call for him?”

He shook his head again.

“But why-”

Again he shook his head, and this time he pulled at the end of the bandage, clearly indicating that he wanted them off. That he didn’t want to talk about Zechs.

Ever again. Though Wufei doubted that the two kind doctors would understand that part.

Dr Grant didn’t hesitate to continue. He thought that the boy was upset and needed something to comfort himself with.

“Wufei, I want you to open your eyes for me now. Slowly. Remember what I said about the light?”

Too much exposure can make it all worse...

Make me blind forever....

Wufei nodded and did what he was told.


***


He blinked.

Why couldn’t he see anything?

Why wasn’t anybody saying anything?!

He blinked again, hoping that it might help. That by doing so he would unveil something, but the darkness that had lain before his eyes far too long...

Darkness...

He couldn’t see. He... He was never going to see all the beauty in the world again. The sparkling colors of the fire’s dancing flames, the winter’s whitest snow... the green of spring grass...

Black.

All that was left was black...

A tear fell down his cheek before he could stop it.

No...

And the rest soon followed.

To Be Continued...