Reshuffled and Dealt

A shorter chapter this time, but I'm almost done the next one and hope I can get it up tonight, tomorrow at the latest, so yay for me!

Chapter 3

Ed managed to drag himself into the office and was promptly hauled into Roy’s office. “Where have you been? You just disappeared for a week, didn’t even fill out a sick leave form.”

The blond sank down on the couch. “Shut up.” He rubbed his head, hoping the throbbing would stop. “I feel like shit, Tiffany is sick as hell, neither of us can keep anything down and I’m exhausted.”

“And, I hear you got your girlfriend pregnant! What the hell were you thinking?” A gloved hand slapped against the desk. “Fullmetal, you’re only twenty years old. It’s a bit early to be starting a family, don’t you think?”

“Just shut up. Not like I planned it, ok? Anyways, we’re still waiting for the tests to come back.” Roy sighed and came around to sit beside his subordinate. “I just, need some time, ok? To figure out what we’re going to do.” Dark hair nodded and they sat quietly. “Ok, I came in for two things. First, I need time off, about a month to get organized. And, I need to know exactly what I’m entitled to as a State Alchemist. Accommodations, salary, vacation time, sick days, everything.”

A breath blew out. “I can’t guarantee the time off. I’ll keep you out of rotation as long as nothing vital comes up.” Long bangs nodded agreement. “I’ll have Hawkeye give you a breakdown of salary and time off. You are entitled to a house; I have a few folders you can look through. There are some open now, or you can wait a bit if there isn’t one you like. New ones come available regularly as transfers are put in.” The older officer stood and walked over to rummage through his bookshelf. “Here, this is a nice one, not too big, close to a park, not very close to HQ I’m afraid, but that might be best for you.”

A quick smile and Ed sifted through the folder. “Looks fine. We’ll have the results back in a few days, can I let you know then?” It was a small looking house, but the dimensions given were a decent size, with pictures of three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a living room, kitchen, and small dining room. “I’d like to go look too, check it out.”

“Of course. Let me know when and I’ll take you, if you want.” He hovered for a second, then moved over to sit again. “Ful, Edward. We’re your friends, so if you need anything…”

“Yeah. We’ll be ok. It’s kind of exciting, really. Just think, another little me running around. Or, better yet, Tiffany.” Roy scrunched his face into a horrified grimace and the blond laughed. “Ha! Yeah, that’s what I thought too.” He stood and flipped a quick salute off; he stopped in the door and looked over his shoulder with a small smile. “Thanks, Bastard.” A gloved hand waved and the small form flitted away, heavy steps jogging down the hall.

Hawkeye appeared at the door before it swung shut. “General, sir, are you finished?” Roy hunched over and tried to look small and busy. “I have a lot of work for you today, sir. Please finish before it’s time to go home.”

****************

The doctor arrived scowling and Al immediately took his brother’s hand and reached over to pat Envy’s shoulder. “Well, this is a bit awkward. Do you want to talk about this in private?”

He was staring at Ed and cocked his head towards Envy. “Ah, should I? I don’t really hide things from them, so I think you can talk about it with us all.”

“As you like. Seems a bit cruel to me, but whatever you want.” The gruff man pointed at the young woman. “You, miss, are definitely pregnant. Almost two months.” The finger shifted to the older blond. “And you,” He sighed. “Are too. Same timeline.”

Al squeaked when both hands were squeezed. They could all hear Envy’s teeth grinding together and Ed reached over to put an arm around her, just in case she felt the need to kill something.

“Now, normally, I wouldn’t do this. But. Seeing as how the pregnancy is a result of an alchemic accident, you are male, and you have another on the way, I recommend that you terminate the pregnancy. There is a slim chance, a very, very slim chance, of carrying to term with a high risk to yourself.” The young men sat and stared at him blankly.

“What about me?” Envy spoke for the first time since leaving the house.

A graying eyebrow rose. “You? You seem fine, in good shape to continue with your pregnancy. Try not to get too stressed and eat properly and you’ll be fine. I’ll give you the contact information of a gynecologist; she’s very experienced.”

“Where is it? The baby?” She patted her stomach, looking for a sign.

Large hands moved hers over a spot low on her abdomen. “Right about here. You’ll be able to see it in a month or so.”

“But, if I get rid of it now, I can go back to normal, right?” A small fist balled up and slammed into soft tissue. Ed broke out of his daze and pounced, grabbing her fist before she could hit it again.

“No! No, you can’t!” They struggled, fighting for control until the redhead wore down. “Please En, just, just think about it for a minute.”

“No, I don’t want to. I want to be myself again. I don’t like this.” Full lips moved into a pout.

“I know, I know, just. Doctor, can we have a minute?” A tilt of the head and he stood and left, closing the door behind him. “Look, it’s mine too, right? I really want it. Please, Envy!” He slid to his knees in front of her and hugged her waist. “Please, please.”

“Brother.” Al’s mouth tightened and he set his hands on his brother’s shoulders. “Get up, ok? You shouldn’t be on the floor either.” He hated seeing his brother submissive like that.

“Brat’s brother, go away. Pest, get lost. I don’t want it.” Slim arms folded and she glared at them both. “I hate you.”

“Tough. I do want it. Please En, won't you at least think about it? I’ll do anything.” Her eyes opened and smiled at him.

“Anything?” He nodded quickly. “Absolutely anything?” Pink flitted over his lips but he nodded again. She leaned forward, letting her hair frame their faces. “And if I said make another like me? Would you?”

Ed stared up into cold, laughing green eyes and felt like he was drowning. His throat worked as he swallowed. “And you’ll have it? And look after it if I don’t come back?” He leaned forward to whisper against her lips, so only she could hear. “And mine? Will you take them both, raise them, love them?”

“Brother! You wouldn’t!” The taller blond yanked him backwards but Envy was faster, her hand grabbing the back of the blond head and jerking him forward to meet her lips.

“Done.” Al let go, horrified at the deal that had just been struck. A wide grin and she was laughing, leaning back on her arms, head tilted back, laughter echoing in the room. “Fool. Why would I want another like me?” Her cheeks were flushed and a hand ran through long hair. Ed leaned his head in her lap and let the tears soak through her dress. “I’ll think of something worth my effort.” He nodded against her thigh and hugged her tightly. “You really do want it, don’t you?” He nodded again and she sighed. “Fine. I’ll carry it. But you look after it, got it?”

“Yes. Thank you. Thank you.” The floor was uncomfortable but her lap was warm and fit his head perfectly. A knock at the door and the doctor looked in.

“Well? What are we doing?” He shut the door behind him and sat, watching the couple. Small hands sifted through gold hair and he glared at the smaller blond.

“We’re keeping them both.” He looked up to see the doctor shake his head. “This is my choice, right? Well, I choose to try. What do we have to do?”

“You’re a damn lucky man. Not many women tolerate infidelity, especially with long term results.” All three flushed in embarrassment and Al glared at the rude man. “I’ll send you to a gynecologist, she’ll be able to help you out. She does deliveries regularly and specializes in cesarean deliveries.” He scribbled on a piece of paper and handed it to Ed. “You’ll need to go in immediately, it’s important to get care as soon as possible, especially with a high risk pregnancy.” He stood and moved to the door; he turned, his hand on the knob. “Congratulations, and good luck.” The door shut softly behind him.

“Brother, I, wow, um” The taller stammered and a gentle hand rubbed his shoulder.

“It’s ok, I know.” He took a deep breath. “Well, shouldn’t be too surprised, huh? This is exactly the kind of stupid shit that would happen to me. We just have to see this doctor, right? And she’ll tell us what to do.” He grinned a bit. “If she doesn’t kick us out on our asses for lying.”

“Oh, I’m sure she wouldn’t! She’ll be nice, and if she isn’t, we’ll find one that is!” Enthusiasm brightened the youngest’s eyes. “This is amazing, you’ll be a father. And, and I’ll be an uncle! Twice!” He giggled at the thought. “Let’s go see that doctor right now!”

Ed laughed at his happiness and gathered his things, picking up the redhead’s coat too. “Sure, let’s go.”

“This is stupid. I don’t want to.” Her pupils dilated and she stared at the pair. “I want broccoli.”

“Well, you can’t have any here, so come on. We’ll get some on the way.” The pros and cons of moving were weighed quickly and she hopped up and headed for the door. Al tried to steer her and was slapped at; Ed waved him back and placed a hand on the small of the slim back, turning her towards the little café from the last time.

They managed to bribe the waiter into getting them a bowl of vegetables and chatted while Envy played with it. “Are you actually going to eat that?”

“Fuck you. It’s green.” Gold rolled at her and she growled back. “You eat it.”

“Fine.” The bowl was grabbed and emptied quickly. “Can we go now?” The pert nose was stuck in the air and he sighed. “Envy, you can’t fight me on everything.”

“Watch me.”

“That’s not what I meant. I mean, it’s going to be a long seven months if you keep it up. Can you try to get along, just a little?” Red shook at him and he stood. “Fine. We’re leaving. Al, come on.” He stomped off, leaving her staring after him.

“Brother, is that a good idea? Should you just leave her?” The tall young man ran to catch up.

“That idiot can either do it alone or get along.”

“Brother. You’re letting your temper lead you again.” The metal arm was grabbed and Ed whirled around, slightly shocked. Al didn’t touch his auto-mail often, he knew how much he hated that.

“Look, Al, I’m not spending seven months fighting. This is going to be hard enough without that.”

"And I understand that, but Brother, when were you last in complete control of your body?" Amber colored eyes rolled at him.

"Don't be weird Al, we're human, we can't ever completely control our bodies. Most of the human body runs automatically; breathing, heart beats, right down to the cellular level." Al's hand moved to rest across his shoulders and hug him close.

"But Envy can." Serious brown met wide gold. "He has always been in complete control of himself, his shape, heart beats, he doesn't even need to breath if he doesn't want to." Ed's mouth worked in astonishment; he hadn't thought about that, or what a shock this whole thing was.

"Oh, wow, I" His hand ran through his hair. "Fuck, Al." They both turned when a small foot scuffed at a little snow pile behind them.

Envy was standing, listening to them argue, her hands tucked up in her sleeves, slightly huddled against the cold air. Ed sighed, stripped off his gloves, and took her little hands between his. The gloves were much too big but she smiled anyway and leaned up to kiss him.

“Feeling the cold are you? Here, just a second." He went to clap and remembered he couldn't. "You'll just have to wear them like that. Ready?” A quick nod and he couldn’t help smiling down at her. “Honestly, what am I going to do with you?” She seemed to give it serious thought, then clasped her hands behind her, pushing her chest out and he laughed. “That again, huh? Maybe when we get home.” He’d forgotten Al was still standing beside him and turned as red as his brother was when he remembered.




So, before anyone pounces on me, no, I don't think Ed would do it, and he never said he would. 'Course, I don't think Envy would give up being unique and one of the strongest beings alive. Also, I'm changing the name a bit, it's just too different to be left. Sorry, I'm sure nobody will get lost. *L* The original titled referred to the cards of fate and this one plays into that as well. Because we all know fate just can't leave her favorite bitches alone. Thanks for reading and review please!