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Prologue
By : Herpb4uDerp
Category: Missing Data > Missing Data
Views: 194 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
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Neither Here. Nor There.

Goten wakes up at god knows what hour to a phone call. Or five. He looks at who it is, silences it and goes back to sleep because whatever it is, the bitch can wait.

When he wakes again it is with his alarm and his phone now has over fifty missed calls from the same person. He smiles at her persistence but doesn't have time to call her back before heading out to spar with his father. Which ended up being miserable. The worst to date. Through the whole thing Goku was missing hits, not blocking, not even looking at Goten half the time and his son has to call it a day about twenty minutes in because at this rate he was going to seriously and for once unintentionally injure his father.

He’s never like this. He's never sloppy. Never unfocused. And yet he's been like this for days, today more than ever and Goten has the aching feeling he knows exactly what- or rather who- is the cause of it because he was bothering Goten too.

Everything has been off since I went to Capsule Corp and Goten's having a lot of trouble understanding what the hell he’s supposed to do about that. Nothing went the way it was supposed to and if Goten thought Vegeta was difficult to talk to before it was down right impossible now. He was now always in the gravity chamber. Goten’s sure he hasn’t left in days. Which is getting really irritating! How am I supposed to get under your skin, under your sheets, if I can't get near you?!

Every time he thinks he has their relationship? That's probably a strong word for it, figured out, one of them does something that forces him to completely rework his tactics. He's starting to think he's been approaching this situation all wrong. He's been trying to maneuver Vegeta, who is impossibly stubborn, when instead... he had a far more malleable piece of the problem in front of him.

So, despite their mutual disappointment in this morning's spar Goten insists they do something other than return home, intent on finding out just what is going on inside his father's head so he can exploit it. Goku happily interprets this as an open invitation to find something to eat.

Half an hour later Goten finds himself laying on a shaded bank lazily watching his father who is wearing a borrowed pair of Goten's dark sweatpants rolled up to the knees.

Goku was not very happy about having to wear them, but he didn't have much of a choice. The comfy colorful clothes he had adopted off planet were getting worn and Gohan said Goten had his gi. But when Goku asked for it Goten nonchalantly informed him he had burned it. When questioned why his son only replied, 'Ask Vegeta.'

It was a risky thing to say, he knew it, but Goten felt fairly confident that one, his father wouldn't ask, two, if he did Vegeta wouldn't tell him, and three, those two words would bother the shit out of him.

He was right on all counts and after a long quiet pause under his father's half irked half suspicious stare, Goten couldn't resist following up by throwing him a pair of his own, giving him his usual shit eating grin, and walking away. The conversation left Goku hesitant to replace the bright orange gi until he figured out why it was burned in the first place but the subject hasn’t come up again.

Everyday it was becoming harder and harder to ignore the aching suspicion Goten was hiding something. But he couldn't find the words to express that without Goten throwing it right back at him. Even months later, he was no closer to figuring out what it was now than the day he returned.

And despite the daily decrease of Goku's confidence in Goten's trustworthiness, his son still had this way of poking and prodding at the truth, still had this way of being the only person he could talk to. Goten found easily the words Goku silently struggled with. Of course he usually just used those words to reaffirm Goku’s painful insecurity about… everything.

The doubts, worries, concerns, the fears Goku tried so hard to push down were all constantly shoved back in his face lined by a familiar caustic smirk like his son knew something he didn’t. Which, Goku admits, his son knew lots of things he didn’t, but sometimes he got the feeling he knew things he shouldn’t.

It was all so confusing and left Goku at even more of a loss with deciphering Goten than he was with Vegeta who had taken years of patience and countless arguments to understand and truthfully, was still a work in progress. But at least he never burned my things! ...right? What kinda answer is that? 'Ask Vegeta?' You're the one who burned it! What does this have to do with him? …. … .. .

For now, it is all out of sight and out of mind. He is poised with closed eyes and bent knees. He has one foot in front of the other and stands completely still in the shallow waters swishing by him. His arm is raised, angled, ready to dive into the cool crisp river as soon as his prey is close enough.

Goten dips his hand in the water with a smile disturbing it the moment he senses any fish get close. It turns out this is a good exercise for him too. The kis are so small it takes some effort on his part to separate them from the two enormous Saiyan kis trying to drown them out. By the fourth time he dips his hand into the water he can see his father shake his head slightly, agitated that his prey keeps swimming away just as he is ready to strike.

After finally plunging his hand in and coming back with nothing he whips around glaring at his son, "Do you wanna eat?" Goten gives his father an innocent look and nods."Then stop! Are you doin’ that on purpose?"

"Doing what?"

"You keep scarin’ the fish."

Goten sighs lazily and rolls on to his back.

Goku huffs at his sons indifference, "Why are you messin’ everything up?"

Goten has a feeling he's not talking about the fish, which was fine, because he didn't want to talk about fish either, "It wasn't me who was 'messin' everything up' this morning." He says casually.

"Goten, I-"

"What?"

Goku pauses and wonders now, more than ever, just what Vegeta meant about him being 'capable.' Capable of what? He was a skilled fighter, yes, but there was something else lurking there under the surface that was starting to set him on edge lately, especially when Goten seemed to be in a good mood like he was today, especially when he kept continually doing things like this, however small or harmless they seemed. ".... I dunno. I just... thought this would be easier." Goku sends a narrow blast of ki into the water and they both watch as a coi nearly as big as they were bubbles up to the surface partially charred.

"What, catching fish?” He smirks.

No. Comin’ home. "Catchin’ fish isn't hard except when you make it more difficult than it needs to be." Goku steps out of the river dragging the unfortunate creature chosen for breakfast behind him, sits down in the grass and makes quick work of gutting it.

Goten smiles, “Where’s the fun in doing things the easy way?" His father doesn't take the bait to lighten the atmosphere and settles into silence. When they are done devouring what could have been a better tasting breakfast Goku assumes a meditative position to try and focus on anything other than the far away ki that keeps painfully ebbing to the forefront of his mind. Goten however, decides there's no time like the present to ruin his father's day.

"You really sucked today.” He draws out the ‘really’ for emphasis, “This whole week, actually. What uh, what's bothering you?” He shoots a small absent blast of ki into the river and watches a fish bubble to the surface and drift with the current down the river.

Goku shoots a disapproving look at his son but doesn't say anything. He takes a long time to think about his one word, one name answer. He feels embarrassment creep up remembering the text messages. Something about the way his son reacted to that doesn't sit right with him. However, he also thinks, despite Vegeta and Goten's apparent issues with each other, if anyone could understand, if anyone could help him sort through this, it would be his son who was far more confident and comfortable with the more 'Saiyan' traits they had in common.

Although that confidence had a tendency to grate on his nerves when it resulted in text messages from strangers telling him he was the cuter twin, definitely the good twin. Even though we are NOT twins! Ahg!!!!! Goten! I don't care if the coffee shop guy seemed nice! Stop givin' out my number!

Ultimately he decides honesty is the best policy while Goten sat there quietly getting impatient with his father's drawn out 'thinking' over something he already knew the answer to. They both move to push the conversation along.

"I know about you and-" "Vegeta-"

They talk over each other and halt.

Goku can't stop the questions he had been ignoring so he could focus on repairing the things that were supposed to matter most, from resurfacing. Most prominently, because he knows Vegeta would never say something about it, would he? "When did you find out? ...Was it… was it ‘cause of the messages?”

Goten chuffs, “No. No, I knew... before you came back.”

Goku’s eyes widen. “You knew this whole time? But you- you weren’t- I don’t-” He stutters through a waterfall of emotions he wasn’t even sure he could identify. “H-how!?”

“How do you think?” He pauses to keep his father in just another moment of tormented guessing agony, “Vegeta told me.”

“I- ... No he didn’t.”

“Yes. He did.”

“He wouldn’t. I know he wouldn’t, it-" was one of the rules. “He wouldn’t.”

“But he did! I mean-” Goten shrugs, “he didn’t exactly use a lot of words…. But yeah… he told me.”

Goku sits there on the grass devastated and dumbfounded with disbelief.

“Honestly even if he hadn’t told me, it was kinda... obvious.” Goten laughs, “If you heard the way he talked about you- Oh God." Goten notices a tiny smile tugging at the corner of father's mouth."It wasn't nice. Ever. If that's what you're thinking."

Goku's face flushes. That had been exactly what he was thinking or at least hoping.

“He never said anything nice about you if you could get him to say anything at all. It was pretty much limited to 'third class' this, 'idiot' that, 'real Saiyans don't run away' this, 'you need to train harder to beat me, if you want to be the one that gets to kill him' that."

Goku’s face breaks into a sad smile. He hasn't changed at all.

"And there was just something about the tight clothes and- and his stupid flamboyant-” Goten gestures in an attempt to mock Vegeta’s mannerisms. "That always set off my gaydar."

"Your what?"

Goten snorts, you know dad, the sad part here is, I'm not lying, “I dunno. There just comes a point when denial becomes affirmation. I can’t explain it, but it didn't surprise me as much as it should have." and I really, really should have figured it out sooner. "He was obsessed with hating you, with proving to everyone how much he hated you." Goten shakes his head and mutters, “talk abouta bad break up."

"… He doesn't hate me…" Goku frowns and absently threads his finger through the grass, "That's just... how Vegeta is."

“What?”

"...Yeah, he says those things but he doesn't mea-"

"Wait- Has he said those things... to your face?! He called you a 'worthless third class idiot' to your face?"

"... He doesn't mean it-" Goku says quietly.

"Ha!" Goten claps his hand over his mouth to stop himself from laughing, "What do you mean he doesn't mean it?" His father's silent expression tells him everything he needs to know and he sighs, “Y’know, I thought I was doing you a favor by telling you this. I didn't realize he was like that before you left. Are you fuckin' serious? He said that shit to your face and you still slept with him? How could you let someone use you like that?"

"He wasn't using me. Maybe at first but I- I was usin' him too." His words are rushed nervous and defensive as his face heats with embarrassment. "At first."

“You? You think you were using him?” Goten scoffs, “Oh c'mon. You're not that stupid. Are you?"

Goku shoots an offended look toward his son, "No. I'm not."

Right. "Dad, this... 'arrangement' you had with him, or whatever you seem to think it was, I honestly don't know much about it" and please let's keep it that way because I really don't want to know about whatever weird fucked up shit he's gotten you to believe is 'Saiyan custom.' "But I do know, that how you feel about him and how he feels about you are two very different things."

"No, it's- it's the same. He just… doesn’t show-"

"Yeah. Ok. Sure. Kami, this is bad." Goten sighs and rubs his eyes with his palm, "Listen. I am far more experienced than you could ever hope to be on this matter. So trust me when I say he is quite literally using the fuck out you and I guarantee whatever he did or said to make you run away the first time, he will do it again."

"He didn't make me run away, I-"

"You wanna know why he isn't responding to your texts? It's because he doesn't care. Because he's stronger than you now."

"He- what? Stronger? What does that have to do with-"

Goten snorts, "I’ve heard him talk enough shit about your 'rivalry' to know that whatever this was between you two was rooted in his psychotic obsession with power and obvious inferiority complex and-" Goku stares at him. “I’m saying he’s fuckin' crazy!”

"… He's not the person he used to be-"

Goten sits back on his hands. "Wow. How can you keep making excuses for someone who treated you so badly?" Goku doesn't answer. "Like everyone always said you were soft, but- dad you are impossibly forgiving and you don't deserve this. There are plenty of other...." he looks at the bones beside them and smiles, "fish in the sea... who don't want to tear out and eat your intestines while soaking in the entrails of victory that is domination over you when they're having a bad day."

"You're making that one up, he never said that."

"The point is not what he says! It's-!" Goten's tone softens with pity, "It's that you need to know this isn't right. What are you still holding on to? It's clear he doesn't feel the same way and he’s using this to hurt you."

Goku turns his burning red face to the intermittent rippling in the water and stays quiet. He is cautious to reveal the things he felt were private. It isn't like that. More so, he wanted to keep hidden just how little he knew about the inner workings of a relationship he's had for so long. Is it?

There had always been doubt of course. There had always been arguments, questions, things he wanted but never got, conditions, rules, breaking points. It had been rough, sometimes violent... but... They were Saiyans. They did it like Saiyans. It was just complicated and he didn't know how to put what it was in words; the things he felt, the reasons why, the deeper nature of the only other full Saiyan that he couldn't stand but always understood. He didn't know how to explain how he knew it wasn't like that without telling Goten things he didn't want to tell him. He's got Vegeta all wrong... Unless-

And while his father has an internal crisis regarding the nature of his relationship with Vegeta as told by Goten, his son sat there trying to figure out how he could make it any more obvious to this dense, naive man, that Vegeta hated him. Didn't want him. Certainly didn't care for him. And whatever the two of them still think they had needed to End.

Goten didn't even have to make anything up! That was the worst part! Vegeta was an absolutely miserable person to be around! Who would want that!? ...Wait...

"Kami, dad, what has he done to you?"

"He didn't do anything to me. That’s not why I’m-"

"Sure, sure he didn't." he rolls his eyes, "Next you're going to tell me he had rules that only applied to you or something, like that the lower cla-"

That hits a tender nerve and Goku snaps back before he can think, "The rules weren’t only for me- we both broke 'em-!" He immediately reels with regret over what he'd just admitted to someone who should not have heard it

Goten’s mouth drops open at his father who looks mortified. "Ohh no." He says slowly and just a little bit sarcastically, "Dad... what were the rules?"

"It doesn't matter! That's private!" he rushes out, "And I agreed to them. So it was ok."

"Are you sure? 'Cause I'm startin' to think... you'll agree to anything for Vegeta, even if it's not ok."

"I- No." His voice falters with shame and pain and humiliation running rampant all over his face.

He didn't need to push that subject any further, it was already clear what type of 'rules' they were. Vegeta SAID there were rules but I really didn't think it was like THAT, "You know, I'm starting to understand why you thought running away might have been the best thing for you. This is so much worse than I thought! He's got you completely wrapped up in this sick fucked up little game of hi-"

"Wh- No- he's- it wasn't like that! You don't know! You are just assumin' things and- and stop saying I ran away!"

"What? Of all- You did run away."

"I didn't! I always planned on comin' back, it was only supposed to be a few-"

"Who cares how long you intended to be gone? You left! It doesn’t matter if it's for a day, a week a year, or fifteen. You. Left! You. Ran. Away!” His voice steadily rose with each word until he yelled the last one.

".... You said you weren't still mad about th-"

"Yeah? Well! I lied! It hurt every time you left. Every time you weren’t there for us. The amount of time was just insult to injury. Tch! It still hurts! Even though you're back- especially that you're ba-! ..." He stops because he hadn't meant to say that. Any of that. Where did that even come from? When did the conversation shift? He was supposed to be the one in control. His head snaps down to hide his confusion, emotion wrought face. He runs the fingers of his left hand through his hair and pulls at the roots until there is pain, enough to pull him away from the thoughts he didn’t want to deal with right now. Or ever.

"Goten, I’m s-”

“Don’t. Say anything.” He exhales shakily and doesn’t look up.

Goku’s mouth closes and he looks away.

“We're done training for today. Just. Go.”

Goku doesn’t move, he’s not sure he should leave, but he didn’t know what else to say, didn’t know what else to do, didn’t know what else to-

“Now!” Goten snaps angrily before quietly adding, “… I’ll find my own way home.”

Goku nods and decides maybe there was no hope in trying to re-bond with his son because each attempt only seemed to drive a wedge deeper and deeper between them. This alone was the worst conversation he's ever had with someone and he'd had a lot of conversations with Vegeta that resulted in bone cracking fights.

Vegeta. He wanted- no, needed to talk to him. Alone. He wanted- no, needed answers. Truth. He looks at his son who was pulling himself inward. His sons ki is distracted, bothered, anxious and Goku feels sort of bad for thinking this was a good time to leave. But taps his index and middle to his forehead anyway and focuses on the other troubling ki that was causing him so much strife.

Goten feels the energy that was buzzing right next to his suddenly disappear. He doesn’t think about where it reappeared. He is trying to push the world away. He takes advantage of the uncomfortable solitary silence to regroup his thoughts and check his phone. He taps through the screen and scrolls through the- oh my god, how many times did she call me? He flips over to the messages. They ranged from four in the morning until one minute ago.

He starts reading through them. One of them has a picture attached. Is that the gravity r-? His heart thumps out of his chest with fear when he realizes what he's looking at. How the fuck did she- No. No, no, no, NO, NO. NO! NO!!! NO!!!! Anyone but her. ANYONE BUT HER! SHE COULDN'T HAVE FOUND OUT! NOT HER! WHAT THE F-

Goten shoots up trying his damnedest not to have a mid air panic attack as he bolts toward Capusle Corp.

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A//N: SORRY FOR THE WAIT. T_T updates will likely become sporadic. Sorry. Life is wylin' right now. In a good way, but I am CRAZY busy here for the next few months. I absolutely have every intention of finishing this final edit. just might not be weekly like I'd hoped. TTTT_TTTT
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Prologue	By : Herpb4uDerp Category: Missing Data > Missing Data Views: 194 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
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Prologue