Adult-FanFiction.org : Gundam, Beyblade, DBZ, FMA

Prologue
By : Herpb4uDerp
Category: Missing Data > Missing Data
Views: 194 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer:
Chapter List
- 39
- 40
- 41
Liberation
Chapter Summary
Goku ruins his marriage and it's really a good time for everyone.

He has just returned to mount Paozu after taking Goten home and the sun has barely risen above the treeline as he walks through the door. He is surprised to find his wife already awake at the counter washing dishes or cooking, he doesn't know, he doesn't care. Not today.

He stops in the hallway and remains quiet as he takes in her figure. Always conservatively dressed she hides her age well, but she's not Saiyan; it still shows through her graying hair and wrinkles on her face. She was a little rounder, a little more fragile though her ki was still high and bright for a human and it glowed through her. She was still strong, determined, and organized; things he desperately needed from anyone trying to be more than the occasional sparring partner.

He thought, considering the circumstances, he'd made a pretty good choice for a wife. Not that it had been a choice. She had decided almost everything about their relationship, including there even being a relationship in the first place. And although he knew it was completely necessary because he had no idea what to do in that regard it could at times feel... suffocating; drowning him in obligations and expectionations he could never seem to uphold or meet.

In fact, even though he knew how much it hurt her each time he left, the cause for those temporary absences both with Vegeta and alone had morphed over time from the simple desire to fight into a necessary escape from a life he found more and more frustrating as time went on. Because, well, saving the world? That was easy: Train, fight, win. So easy! But... keeping Chi Chi happy? Keeping himself happy with her? Settling down to live a human life despite being everything but that? Not so much.

But this was how it was supposed to be. He was supposed to be happy with her, supposed to stay with her. Supposed to want her. She had told him so. Everyone told him so.

...Even Vegeta said so.

"Goku!” She smiles at him, “Where were you? Do you want Brea-" Her words drop off in surprise when she feels his arms wrap tightly around her. She can feel a shaky breath against her neck as his lips touch her skin and his nose brushes away her hair. She sets down what was in her hands and tries to turn around but he doesn't let her. He holds her tighter.

"Chi Chi..." His fingers press a little harder. "I'm sorry."

"... It’s… ok..." She says slowly. She isn’t sure quite what he’s apologizing for and feels him shake his head. She waits for him to say something more but he never does.

Yes, a part of her had been furious at him; furious that her hard work to create the family she wanted was ruined by the one she relied on to maintain it, furious he left her for the hundredth time, and for so long. But now that he was here again she found it impossible not to let her bitterness melt away like it always did every time he came back.

She found it impossible not to want to acknowledge how hard he'd been working the last few months to make it up to her, the lost time. She found it impossible not to notice how much he hadn't changed, how much he was still the man she fell in love with. Handsome, spontaneous, and so sweet even if he could be a little absent minded at times.

So, even though it's a little embarrassing, him touching her like this in the kitchen of all places, she could not bring herself to deny him. Not now, not ever. In fact, she'd been hoping since his return, in the back of her mind, that he would do something other than kiss her and work the fields to show her that waiting had been worth it; to show her he still loved her. As unbecoming of her as it might be, this was the apology she had been looking for and she was ready to accept it.
She had been ready.

It had taken a few weeks but she did invite him back to their bed where to her disappointment, he has done nothing to ease her insecurites. Instead, he has been sleeping there (for a few months now) while she has been laying there next to him, night after night, waiting. She is just a little too embarrassed, a little too nervous to be forward with him after so long. Instead of pressing him for what she wanted she stares up at the ceiling and quietly wonders if it was because he didn't find her attractive anymore. She had taken care of herself, but she wasn't twenty five anymore. She knew that. As much as it hurt her, she couldn't blame him. But then, she had laid like this many many nights before he left too. Why not then either? What is wrong with me? Why doesn’t he want me?

It flooded her with burning shame how much more she wanted him now that he was here again, even after ten- no- fifteen years. She had always remained loyal to her heartbreak and she was so desperate now that he had come back for it all to be worth something. To gain back some semblance of the life she'd been denied. To have what she wanted.

His hands come up and cup her chest and she feels his fingers squeeze lightly, "Goku!" she says as blush quickly works across her face, "why don't we move to the-"

"No." He runs one of his hands down from her chest, along her soft middle and presses it between her legs. He keeps moving his mouth to different places on her neck and rubs his calloused palms against her gently.

His sudden interest catches her off guard but the last thing she wanted to do was start an argument when he finally decided he was comfortable enough to be intimate. So instead of reprimanding him, she leans into his touch and presses her hips back into him slightly. "Ah, Ok..."

He hears a small gasp escape her when he finds the slit along the side of her dress and runs his fingers underneath tearing some of the fabric so his hand could dip beneath the soft cotton and touch bare skin. He relies on her moans to tell him when he finds the sensitive spot along the part of her that always... sort of grossed him out. Even when he did eventually get past how weird and strange women apparently looked, the wet amalgamation of folds and lines and pressure points remained far too complicated for him to ever have any desire to figure out and he was still, after twenty years with her, at a loss of what to do with it all.

He knew he wasn’t bad at this. He knew how to find what someone liked. He knew how to please. Similar to fighting, the answers are hidden in all the little motions and movements you can see, the ones that tell you everything about a strike, where to hit and how hard. It is in the hitch of their breath, their heart rate, the way they shut or suddenly open their eyes, the twitch of their fingers, even the sweat on their skin. Where to touch and how rough. He had done it a thousand times with Vegeta and never failed. So why is it so difficult with her?

In the past he had generally tried to avoid the whole mess by jumping straight to it. Though that usually only seemed to make sex more difficult and he finds it hard to ignore, now that he's got his hand all over it, the reasons why he began having an affair in the first place. But he continues. He needed to show her he could be a good husband, the husband she wanted. He needed to show himself that he didn't want Vegeta, didn't need Vegeta; he still had his wife who, although demanding and critical, loved him, wanted him. Didn’t use him.

He keeps his motions simple and gentle which seems to work because she moans a little louder as his fingers slide across her soft slick folds and find the warm place inside her. He grinds against her trying to get something out of this for himself but keeps getting distracted by the fact that even though she smelled like sex, she didn’t smell like good sex and- Ahg! Why isn't this working!?

He withdraws his fingers, lifts up her dress and strips his sweatpants down to his knees. He tries to stroke himself to the sight but gets frustrated with his body's lack of response and winds up rushing into his waiting wife only halfway to where he needs to be. He thinks maybe the physical stimulation will be enough this time. Sometimes it was. And he begins thrusting into her with fast desperate strokes.

"Goku I-"

He rests his forehead against her neck and one of his hands presses against her cheek, "s-shh Chi, I- ah, I need this. I need you-" to prove I'm ok. It's him- it's him who's broken, not me- I'm- "ah-" He pulls her hips flush against his as he edges one of his hands down from the irritated tail scar he was failing to stimulate to somewhere equally sensitive and presses two fingers into himself. He leans over her and lays his still clothed chest to her back and his face deeper into her neck to keep her from looking back.

And it feels good, but it didn't feel right. He has to try so hard to keep his head from flooding with all the thoughts and feelings and memories that he didn't want to feel or think or remember anymore. He is too stressed out and nothing he does is bringing him any closer. Or even getting him started in the first place. He pulls his hand out from behind him and grips the counter until it cracks as he pounds into his wife harder, trying to find some kind of release.

He can see pain beginning to edge in on her face, hear her hips banging into the counter, feel her legs shaking as he holds her tightly against his relentless pace and he knows this isn't right. Not just for himself, but for her.

"G-Goku- s-s-slow down! S-slow- Stop! Goku, Stop!"

And he does, immediately, nearly soft, almost sobbing, trying to hold back the anger and frustration and desperation he feels as he asks himself WHY this hurt as much as it did, WHY he couldn't just enjoy his wife, WHY this never did anything for him; all of that compounded by the crushing ache he couldn't ignore telling him that he'd never feel with her what he felt with Vegeta, even though he didn't feel anything for me! That is the thought that nearly breaks him.

There is a crackle of energy in his fingertips, the need to release SOMETHING rips through him and he can not hold it back. She almost jumps when he yells and slams his fist straight through the concrete wall dividing the kitchen from the dining room.

She jumps at the sudden reminder that she was married to a Saiyan, "Goku! Goku, I- what's wrong?! What-"

He turns around and looks at the shocked exhausted looking woman he never loved the way she deserved then forces his eyes up to the ceiling to avoid letting the salt prickling the corners to fall down his face. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare ya.” He nearly whispers, “It’s not- I’m jus’ ...”

She walks up to him slowly, without any fear, stepping over the small chunks of tan drywall and grey rock he dislodged from the wall. "I know... I know this has always been... difficult for you... I- it's.. it's ok- It was the first time since.. since you've been back, these things can take time and... I know I'm not as young as I used to be-" she looks up at him softly.

"That's... it's not- It's not you, Chi." He says, letting her wrap her arms around him. He stands against the hole he just made, his arms slack at his sides, thinking about the last time he'd let her down like this. It had been before he left. Several years before he left.

He nervously halts her advances, "I thought you didn't want more kids?"

"I... I don't. But it's... not always about...that" She bites her lip trying not to sound lewd, but they hadn't been together in so long, not since they conceived their second son and she wishes he would show her he desired her a little more often.

He smiles but it is not genuine, “Right...” At the time the guilt of knowing he was getting something she wasn't (earlier that day, too) weighed on him and he didn't know how else to respond other than let her try. She always tried harder than he did.

He quietly untangles her from him. "I'm... gonna shower." He was still covered in blood, sweat and grit from the night before and now he felt even dirtier. All he wanted to do was wash it all away. His wife follows him to the bedroom but lets him shower alone. She passes the time waiting for him to finish by putting on another dress that isn't torn and redoing her hair. He is still not out when she is finished so she presses her ear to the door and opens her mouth to call his name until she hears a sound suspiciously similar to crying. She closes her mouth and decides to give him room instead.

It is late by the time she is done with her usual errands. She caught herself continually stopping to stare off and reflect on what happened this morning, what he had said, what had gone wrong, what was always going wrong.

She wanted to be upset, she wanted to blame him, but she couldn't. Not after seeing how much it bothered him, how badly he wanted to make it right... She started wondering what she could do to make it... easier. Not that it had ever been easy before, but he seemed to be trying so hard to make this work that by the time she found herself back at home just in time to make him dinner, she decided she would try harder too.

When she returns she spends an hour and a half cooking a dinner he never shows up for and finds him still in their bedroom naked as the day he came, sprawled out face down on their bed.

"Goku?" She hears a soft sound letting her know he's awake. "What are you doing? Have you been like this all day?" She throws a blanket over him with a teasing smile, "don't you want to eat? I made-"

"No." And although he could see nothing but pillow, he could feel the hurt that just appeared on her face. "It's... been a long day. I'm tired. I'm just... tired. I'm sorry."

There is a long silence as he feels the mattress dip down next to him, "...What if..." She bites her lip not sure if she would even be able to bring herself to do it, "what if we tried something else?"

His brows furrow, "No, you cook fine Chi, I'm just-"

"I don't mean my cooking." He finally turns over partially to look at her and she places one of her hands on his cheek. "I mean... us. What if... we did something different? Between us? Would that help?"

He props himself up on his elbows and leans in to her hand. He knows she wants him to kiss her, touch her... she always wanted him to do something. It makes his stomach twist with discomfort just thinking about it, especially after this morning. He leans in and kisses her anyway, like he always does and she smiles at him because she doesn't know the difference.

"I... I know there were certain things... that I thought were… degrading... but I'm older, we're... it's harder for me to keep up with you... maybe I can... we can-" He sits up and looks at her trying to figure out what she's talking about as she places her soft hands on his thighs, "I just… I don't want to give up. On us." She positions herself between his legs and looks down at his lap with a slightly open mouth until he starts to pick up on what she's asking.

"I- hold on, let's-" He's hesitant to let her, after the disaster that was this morning, he really wasn't in the mood, but she looks so determined, and he shouldn't stop trying if she doesn't, should I? "Ok... we can try... something different...." He adjusts so she'll be more comfortable.

She didn't think he'd agree this quickly, she thought she'd have a little more time to figure out how to do this and is somewhat flustered as she takes her time looking at him; at his face, then his crotch, then his face again, then at his-

"Chi, if you don't really wanna-" He looks away with discomfort.

"No, I do." She moves her hand around his sculpted hips and keeps him from shifting away from her. Then she reluctantly, lightly, grasps the problem that has stood between them for so many years and moves her face towards the only part of his body that has ever been soft. "I want to."

After a few minutes in her timid fingers and hesitant insecure kisses just below his navel edging ever closer without ever quite getting there, he is convinced this was a bad idea. He is sure he won't be able to get hard, let alone get off, which seemed like a ridiculous notion because blowjobs were supposed to be amazing, had always felt amazing and he himself, was amazing at them and if he could figure it out, he was pretty sure anyone could.

He had actually been surprised by how easy it was to figure out considering how very few things about Vegeta were ever easy to figure out. In fact, Vegeta had made it not just easy but- Wait, no, don't... think... about- But as he feels her finally take him into her mouth, behind the private sanctuary of his eyelids he can see nothing other than Saiyan Royalty.

Without warning his rival is on his knees in front of him, soaking wet, naked torso, tight spandex shorts, dark blue, leaving so little to the imagination, mouth parted, still smirking, he was always smirking, and deep dark eyes looking up at him, daring him to do something-

He feels a pulse of blood run through him and he pulls his bottom lip between his teeth, while shutting his eyes tighter in anguish and embarrassment because this was wrong.

Stop. Thinking. About. Ve-

He tries to shove the image away but he can't help it as she gently moves her tongue around. Vegeta's all he can think about because He does it better. That single image he can't get rid of breaks the dam and now there is a flood of fantasies and memories, some innocent, some definitely not, some of them aren't even Vegeta, but none of them are Chi Chi. He opens his eyes and looks down at her in an attempt to purge his thoughts but it's too late, far too late. He has to give up.

He just wants to feel good and this didn't feel good. It was making him feel worse: lying to her, lying to himself, pretending to want her, to want to be here, to want any of this. Even if he could forget Vegeta, he didn't want this. This frustrating dissatisfaction with his marriage was something he felt before he met Vegeta. And he would have been miserable here with or without the other Saiyan to show him why.

The realization washes over him like an icy cold river on a hot day. Jarring, almost painful, but also offering insurmountable relief.

"Stop." He says quietly as he presses his hand gently against her forehead and slowly pushes her off and away from him. Her face is riddled with confusion, insecurity, her desperation to make things right, her want to have the perfect life he'd denied her in so many ways.

"Chi... I'm sorry. I... don't want... I can't… do this anymore."

This will never work. It had never worked. Not the way she wanted, not the way he wanted. She wanted something he could not give her. He shouldn't have come back to her. Not this time, nor anytime he left. He asks himself as he watches her try not to break down in front of him why he bothered trying these last few months. Why he stayed here when he had the entire world at his fingertips. Their kids were grown, Gohan and Goten didn't live here, they had their own lives, it didn't matter. He didn't need to pretend anymore.

"You... can, I-"

"I can't. Chi Chi, I can't." He places his hands firmly on her shoulders and holds her, trying to figure out where they could go from here.

"No, Goku, you can, I will not-"

"Chi Chi!" he shakes her gently to make her listen. The movement causes tears to fall down her cheeks, "I won't." He wishes he had found a way to tell her sooner, before he left her alone for so long. He moves to wipe one of her tears away but she swats his hand away and stand up. "Chi..." He reaches for her.

"No. NO! Don't TOUCH me!" she bats back his arm defensively and there is a long agonizing silence between them. "I have waited and tried for SO LONG! To make this work." she pauses and breathes heavily through her nose, "You can not IMAGINE what I've gone through, FOR YOU! WAITING for you to come back! Every time you left I- The sacrifices I have made! Because you couldn't! For this family. For our sons. For YOU." She glares at him long and hard. "And YOU have the NERVE to show up here after almost fifteen years of wherever you were! To tell me you can't- no- you won't do this?! That you’ve given up?!"

"I- It's not like I could help it! I didn't know how long I wa-"

She lets out a furious exclamation, "You couldn't help it? YOU COULDN'T HELP IT?! YOU LEFT! You didn't have to LEAVE!"

"I didn't mean t-"

"I don't CARE! I don't- I don't-" Tears are now streaming down her face and she can't bare for him to see her this way, so undone. She was supposed to be the rock in their relationship. "Why can't you do this? Still?! It's so- It's so easy, Goku! I don't ask for much! I really don't! I have offered everything I have to you! And you still can’t- I don’t understand! What more can I do? What am I not giving you? Why..." She laughs it hurts so much to admit, “don’t you want me?” She stares into his dark eyes for a long time but gets no answers, "Is this something you decided while you were away?"

"No, I decided it right now."

"You decided right now, while- while I was- uhg! UHG!" She slams the bedroom door on her way out.

"Wait, no, that's not what I- Chi Chi-" he quickly snags the pair of sweatpants off the floor and throws them on before following her out into the hall.

They are standing in the kitchen a lifetime of problems between them, "Chi..." his mouth closes and he stares at his wife's broken heart, open on display in every line of her face.

"What, was I not up to your standards?! Have you gotten better ones out in space from- from prostitutes? I should have known from how quickly you agreed that you-"

"No, Chi Chi-! I-" he stops short and stares at her trying to figure how he should respond to an accusation that isn't that far from the truth...

"Was there someone else? Is that why you always left? Is that... why you can't- why I'm not-"

'Never tell our wives.' A nagging voice flashes through his head and he bites back at it. I... am done being controlled by Vegeta. Done trying to please him and his stupid conditions, all his annoying rules. None of that means anything now! Goku decided he could say what he wants to who he wants and if anyone deserved to know it was her; the mother of his two children, the woman who'd put up with, housed, and somehow managed to feed them. He wanted to tell her because it was the truth, it was right, and it was the biggest 'Fuck You' to Vegeta he could think of right now and that, that also felt really good.

"Yes." He says with a righteous confidence. The feeling was temporary because the hot cast iron pan, while it didn't hurt, certainly had a heavy thud as it slammed into the side of his face.

"You. Cheating. Bastard." Her voice is low and quiet, simmering with fury and he's impressed by the strength she managed. He was sure that if humans were capable of transformations, she would definitely be a super something right now. "That's it then? You had some whore out there that you-? or was it whores? And Vegeta-! you two always- Was it his idea? To run around on your wives?"

"N-no, Chi Chi. He was- it was him. I was... with him."

There is a long uncomfortable silence. "What?"

"I left... to be... with Vegeta." He says it slowly, each syllable lighter, sweeter than the last. He didn't realize how much that had weighed on him as she blinks at him with an open mouth, "I- I didn't always- the last time was different- we got into an argument... So I left to be alone. I didn't know how long I'd be gone, it was an accident. But… most times I left… were… yeah, to be... " It's not like she was going to make him feel worse about it, he was pretty damn sure he couldn't feel worse about it after last night, so what was the point in lying anymore? He had loved every minute of it up until the end, every damn miserable one. He loved it so much he had been willing to weather it's painful inconsistency just to have it in the fleeting moments it lasted. It hurt more to pretend he didn't want it. He can't deny it, won't deny, so with a quiet exhale he says it, "with him."

Her mouth drops, "You slept with Vegeta? With a-"

The corner of his mouth quirks with a smile, "We didn't do a lot of sleep-" she slams the pan into him again hard enough to cut him off and put him off balance and he thinks he absolutely deserved that one.

"All those 'missions,' all your 'training,' every time you left with him, you-! You were-! For years?! You-" She screams as he lets her hit him with the pan one more time. He stops her when she tries to get him again on the back swing.

She struggles to get the pan free from his grasp but he doesn't let go. He pulls it out of her hands and drops it on the floor and watches her completely break down in front of him. He wonders if this is how Vegeta felt watching him yesterday.

Then her expression pleads softer, "It’s- it’s his fault. He perverted you, that must be- he- it was him-" She was so desperate to cling to any shred of hope that she could have him. But he refused to let her. Not this time.

"No, it wasn’t Vegeta’s fault, Chi Chi. I-" He says with irritation.

"And to think I let that- that monster near my son!" then it hits her, "I let him 'train' my baby- I let him- I didn't know- How could he- he was just a boy and he- Now he's- he did this to Goten too- to my baby-”

"No, Chi Chi! that's not- Vegeta didn’t do anything to him! Goten has nothing to do with this!” His brows crumple in confusion. “That’s not how it works."

"How can you be sure-"

"I- I don't know! Because I was like this before I ever met Vegeta!" She closes her mouth and stares at him through watery eyes, "... even on our wedding night- I- I couldn't- It never felt right with you."

"I- I don't" she can barely form the words, "If it isn't- It's not- Is it because you're Saiyan? Are all Saiyans depraved aliens who-"

He wanted so badly to roll his eyes and ignore whatever irritating thing she was going to say next, let her win, like he usually did when they argued. But he couldn't. He was tired of hearing his insecurities voiced by the people who hurt him most, "YES, Chi Chi! All Saiyans are perverted! er- most of them! I don't know! It doesn't matter- I can't change it! But you know what?! I think I like it-!"

She cuts him off with a scream, "You lying, cheating- Uhg!" she stutters trying to find the word, “How could you do this to me!?! I married you! I supported you! I trusted you! I- I-! AAh! Get! Out! GET OUT!" She yells at the top of her voice. "and THIS TIME, Don't EVER COME BACK!"

"I won't! I don't want to come back!" He sort of regrets saying that but it comes out anyway and he can’t take it back now.

She shoves her hands against his chest but he doesn't budge, "Ahh! I-" Her voice breaks, "You shouldn’t have come back the first time- I- you-”

“I know! ...I know. But I did. And... I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?! You’re-!?” She stops herself and regains what was left of her composure with closed eyes. She takes a deep breath and looks at him with more hurt than he’s ever seen. Her tears stop falling and she points to the door, “Just get out.”

“I-”

“And when you see him, you tell that sick son of a bitch, Vegeta, if he ever comes near Goten-" she pauses to catch her breath, "near either of my children- again, I'll find a way to kill him myself."

He frowns because why does she keep bringing him up? Goku wasn't very good at puzzles, his mind rarely clicked things together that way but he was starting to get the feeling that she had just pointed out something important because out of all the things that have come out of Goten's mouth, he knows at least that had been true. It might have been the only thing Goten has said that’s true.

In fact, the attention they both occasionally received on account of his son's confidence with himself often left Goku feeling self conscious and at times inadequate. He was beginning to think it was no wonder his relationships with both Chi Chi and Vegeta were such disasters. He thinks, maybe Chi Chi had a point, maybe Goten did knew something he didn’t.

He doesn't have much time to dwell on the thought because his wife picks up the frying pan and he has about four seconds to get out of the house before she forces him out with her iron will. He manages to stumble out the door before any serious damage befalls him but it's late and he is a little disoriented by racing thoughts and racing heart. He isn’t sure where to go so he quickly searches out the only energy who might understand why he did what he had just done and just so happened to be awake.

Goku locates him in the middle of west city in an area he is unfamiliar with and hears another shatter of glass as he disappears.

A//N: Ty for your support :,D I'm so happy you're excited about the progression of this story haha. It's come a long way for sure.
- 39
- 40
- 41
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Prologue	By : Herpb4uDerp Category: Missing Data > Missing Data Views: 194 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer:

Prologue