Adult-FanFiction.org : Gundam, Beyblade, DBZ, FMA

Lonely Desire	By : Petya Category: Gundam (all others) > General Views: 12076 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own the Gundam series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 4
- 5
- 6
Pairings: Athrun x Kira, less Dearka x Yzak

Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Gundam
SEED. :(

Warnings: This fanfic contains male/male
relationship(s). If you don't like
such things you'd better avoid
reading it for your own
good. There
might be some spoilers up to the end of SEED.

Comments: Another chapter is
ready. The others are in my head. I hope I�ll be able to type them soon.

Chapter
FIVE

Strange
Behavior

The
doorbell rang again and he almost jumped in surprise. Athrun
went to open the door.

This
time there were Yzak and Dearka
both looking quite full of themselves.

�Hey, what did you do this for?� Came Yzak�s voice and he directed his fist at Athrun�s face. The latter avoided easily since the hit was
not meant to be serious anyway and looked curiously at the couple in front of
him.

�What�s up, Dearka,
how did you succeed in pissing him off this early in the morning?�

�Me? Now it is my fault? It was you who decided
in the last moment to come here and Cagalli almost
ruined our anniversary celebration. You should be really grateful she didn�t
succeed in this or I would have ripped your head off personally!� There was a
touch of laughter, satisfaction and mild irritation in the blonde�s voice as he
made this mock threat, but Athrun didn�t feel like
digging on the matter any further. His mind was occupied with other matters of
greater importance.

�Fine, whatever, come
in.�

But before they could enter the foyer they saw Cagalli�s car appearing from behind the corner. Athrun waited for her and Lacus that was in the passenger
seat next to her as the others went inside to greet Kira.
As soon as the two girls exited the car the three of them followed.

Kira, Dearka and Yzak were in the living-room discussing the pictures. When
she saw them Lacus clasped her hands in joy and went to explain how nice and
beautiful the girl looked, how she couldn�t wait to get acquainted to her and
how lucky the brunet was to have met her. This continued endlessly. Cagalli started questioning about Ai�s family, history,
education. Dearka commented on her physical appearance
(it was funny that he continued to buy those magazines with naked girls and it
was a constant reason for everyone to tease Yzak,
that he was not enough for his boyfriend, since the platinum went ballistic
when he found one of those offending things, as he refered
to them) and especially her breasts. What was his obsession with breasts? Was
it because his lover didn�t have such attributes? The blue-haired boy stopped
paying attention at the conversation and just stood there hoping the others
would shut up soon, but they showed no indications of it.

Athrun needed to exit that room. He couldn�t stand
listening to how Dearka, Cagalli
and Lacus questioned Kira about his girlfriend and
what each picture signified, where had it been taken,
when, what had they been doing and so on. He felt his head spinning and it was
as if all those Ai�s on the pictures danced around him a crazy dance meant to
ensure his madness. He silently went out in the corridor and just wandered
around the house aimlessly.

He had to be alone for a moment to regain his
own sanity and stability and he headed for the kitchen hoping that there he
would be able to find some peace and clear his mind. However he had just
stepped inside it when he noticed that Yzak was
already there. He distantly remembered that the blue-eyed had mentioned
something about preparing coffee for the others. Athrun
withdrew and grabbed the closest doorknob not caring where it led. He opened
the door and stood still. He didn�t need to look inside to know it was Kira�s bedroom � his aura, his scent were
all over him and he almost lost his balance. He leaned heavily on the wall by
the door still hesitating whether or not to intrude on his beloved�s personal
space.

He couldn�t resist the temptation. This was his
chance. Yzak was in the kitchen taking care of the
coffee, the others were engaged in conversation in the living room and no one
would notice if he disappeared for a sec. That�s all he needed � a second in Kira�s room. He drew a deep breath and entered the room.

He looked around trying to remember every
single element that surrounded his friend. Something caught his attention�

He moved towards the nightstand. There were
photos. But what he found strange was the fact that there wasn�t a single
picture of Ai. Instead all the pictures featured him and Kira.
And in the center was the picture that decorated his own
nightstand � the one of them together, embracing each other by the shoulder,
taken when they were still kids. His hand flew towards the picture and lovingly
traced the darling contours. Where were those two now. He felt so old and worn
out, nothing like the boy he had once been. He felt sorry for the lost
innocence, for the lives he had taken, for so many other things� But most of
all, he was sorry for what Kira had been put through.
If he � Athrun � had chosen to enlist in the
military, Kira had been swept away by accident� He
was never really given a choice�

But those pictures raised his hopes. If Kira was so deeply in love with that Ai girl he would have
had a pic of her in such a significant place, but
instead there was not a single sign of her in the whole room.

Athrun bent down to the soft bed that had the scent
of his beloved and reached for the pillow. He drew it in his arms, buried his
face inhaling the intoxicating smell and imagined it was Kira
in his embrace�

Some noise woke him up from his daydream. How
long had he spent in the room? Did they notice his absence? He quickly arranged everything the way he had
found it and careful not to be noticed left the room.

�It�s time we left!� Cagalli
stated and headed for the door. As always she considered her words to be final.
�We�ll go to the private airport by cars. We�ll continue on plane.�

�Where exactly are we going?� Came Dearka�s curious voice directed at Yzak,
but he seemed not to hear or chose to ignore the queston.

�Does it matter now? We�ll know soon enough.� Told him Kira obviously unimpressed by Cagalli�s attempt at suspense.

When they arrived at the airport Kisaka was there waiting for them.

�Is he coming too?� Lacus seemed surprised.

�No way!� Cagalli�s tone was
that of absolute determination. �I have enough of him here, I don�t intend on
having him hover around me while I�m on vacation.�

�But your security?� Kisaka sounded
worried.

�You know, if four
former MS Aces, three of whom with the proper military training, can�t ensure
my safety, nobody else would be able to. Get over it. You are not coming! I need to be just Cagalli for a few days, so the Representative of ORB stays
here.�

�As you want.� He looked at the boys with stern face. They
each nodded slightly, indicating that they�ll protect the Princess. �The plane
is ready.�

They loaded their luggage and Cagalli took the pilot�s place.

�Are you piloting?� Kira
asked.

�I can assure you I�ll manage,
little brother. It�s not my first time. Besides I know where we are going.�

�Hey,� Kira raised
his hands in defensive move �I never said you were incapable. This was just a
question.�

Yzak entered the plane without a comment. Dearka sensed something was troubling his friend. It was
not like him not to tease Cagalli on her piloting
skills. The blond stepped in the plane and saw that his lover had already taken
the the inner seat at a row at the back. He sat next
to him but kept silece as the other took their seat.
He noticed that Kira and Athrun
sat away from each other. Only Lacus went closer to Cagalli
but didn�t disturb her during the take off. She would speak only when the
Natural turned the autopilot on.

Dearka�s mind returned to Yzak.
Something was clearly amiss but he wouldn�t speak until he thoroughly thought
everything over from all possible angles, he had made his mind and a decision
was reached. It was funny that someone whose feeling are always so close to the
surface would be so calmly thinking, but if there was one thing that the
platinum (and all of them who had been lucky enough to survive) had learned
from the war, it was that thinking before acting is what they should do.

Yzak�s head leaned on the tanned boy�s shoulder. Dearka embraced his lover and silently offered his support.
The other boy answered with a slight movement of the head as he snuggled closer
to his lover and put his hand at his thigh before going deeper in his thoughts.

* flashback *

Yzak was watching the coffee machine when a
movement in the edge of his peripheral vision caught his attention. Knowing
that there was no threat, he slowly looked in the direction of the distraction
to see Athrun walking out of the kitchen, clearly
wanting to remain unnoticed. He wondered why Athrun
acted so strange and started following his actions. He saw him opening a door
and hesitantly entering it. It was not like Athrun to
behave like that. Was there a problem?

The
platinum couldn�t suppress his curiosity and carefully followed his friend. He
stood by the door and opened it enough to see what was the
green-eyed doing inside. This was a bedroom � Kira�s,
since it was his house. His eyes dilated.

It was
not what the other was doing. It was the face he had that shocked Yzak. Athrun was in profile so it
was easy to watch his expression as he lifted his hand and touched a picture
standing on a nightstand. The older boy didn�t see the picture itself but the
longing expression that marked Athrun�s face was well
known to him. He had been used to seeing that face in the mirror for so long.

Athrun turned towards the bed and took the pillow
that laid there, then he pressed his face in it and inhaled the scent.

The truth hit Yzak like a direct hit from a beam. Athrun was in love.

In love with Kira�

No
wonder he had been so under the weather lately. For the last three months to be
precise, ever since Kira announced he had a
girlfriend and started spending so much time with her.

The
platinum silently closed the door and returned to the kitchen wondering had he
been so engulfed in his newly discovered happiness that he hadn�t noticed what
was under his nose. He tried to remember Athrun�s
actions as far back as possible. The other was so reserved when it came to
feelings, never revealing anything to anyone besides Kira.

There
was the clue. As far as Yzak knew it had always been Kira� The only person Athrun
believed unconditionally in even when they were opposing each other during the
war, the only person he truly ever opened to, the only one he would share his
thoughts, hopes, worries�

Kira� Always Kira!

* end of flashback *

Yzak felt somewhat sorry for his friend. He knew
what he went through. Hadn�t the older boy been the same when he thought Dearka saw him only as a friend. He was so glad that
everything between him and his long time friend and now lover were so good.

The platinum had been with his eyes closed
while he thought of what he had witnessed earlier in the day but now he opened
them slightly, so that the would still seem closed but he would be able to see Athrun that occupied a seat raw ahead and on the other side
of the isle. The blue-haired boy seemed consumed by the view but every once in
a while, when he thought that no one looked in his direction, he would cast a
look at the brunet that stood a few seats ahead of Yzak.
He controlled his expression, but deep in the ocean colour
eyes sneaked longing that tore the platinum�s heart.

What was there was not simply love. That was
something that went deeper still. It was as if the other boy missed a piece of
his soul that Kira possessed.

Yzak closed his eyes unwilling to intrude and peek on
his friend in such a moment. He wondered whether there was any chance for his
two friends to ever be together. He had never noticed Kira
having special feelings towards Athrun, but he had
never noticed the same about the green-eyed too, yet the fact was there�

He lifted his head from Dearka�s
shoulder and very silently started to tell him what had he seen and what he
thought was the best way to test if their friends could share some of the
mutual happiness they shared.

Lacus looked around the plane. The environment
was so strange. Tense, but not in the way as usually after a fight or an
argument. If she had to describe it, it felt more like the electricity and tension
that gathered in the atmosphere before a storm. Everyone acted out of
character.

Yzak, who was usually so energetic and stated his
opinion not caring whether or not the others were willing to hear it, was now
leaning on Dearka�s shoulder in a way that was
clearly not one to express his love. There was some heavy thoughts that required his attention that
were not there when they met in the morning. Something must have happened while
they were in the house, but she had no idea what that could be.

Athrun was gazing out of the plane window but
whatever was his eyes were fixed at, was not in the
view below them, as beautiful as it was. His behavior had been awkward ever
since she and Cagalli had arrived. He had
seemed distant, he didn�t speak and he wandered around the house aimlessly his
mind far away. He left the room they were in and when he returned he seemed
even more spaced out.

And Kira � he was now
in a seat, his eyes on the computer screen and his fingers flying over the
keyboard, but every now and then they would pause as if he forgot what he was
doing. He had the most awkward behavior of all. Lacus couldn�t explain why she
felt Kira was different. There was nothing really
strange about his actions or words, but she sensed something was amiss and that
something was like a fog that covered everything and slowly drained the
life-force of the brunet.

The pink-haired songstress wondered how the vacation would turn out�

@Kimi: Don�t we all lie, hoping that this will ease
our pain and in the meantime we end up hurting the ones we love the most. It�s
the same with Kira.

@ ~Sango~:
Thanks!

@pancake: Thank you! God, I like the �prissy and bitchy like
a girl on PMS� part. This is exactly what Yzak is like. I wish I had come up with this description.

@AsuKira: I�ll never grow tired of compliments J

A/N: I have a plea to all of you who read. I have
an idea that I am not sure what to do with, so I want to make a small survey. Share
your opinion please.

I am thinking of getting Kira pregnant (ok it�s a 90% possibility). Dr Hibiki did more experiments than we thought. I am
consulting doctors in medicine to make this as plausible as possible.

So I am curious what do you all
think about male pregnancy in fanfics. Do you hate
it? Do you not mind it as long as it is well explained.
Do you like it? (that�s unlikely, because even I am
not sure I do) However. That�s the
one.

The other is: If Kira gets pregnant should he bare a normal and healthy baby
or should he have a miscarriage which is more likely in a �real� world?

Please think about it and tell me
what is it you think. Thanks in advance.
- 4
- 5
- 6
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Lonely Desire