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The More I Learn to Care For You: Ed's POV	By : squallstorm Category: Fullmetal Alchemist > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 3037 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 4
- 5
- 6
Disclaimer: I don't
own...Willing to marry into the family though.

Roy's
dialog belongs to ZaKai. Be sure to check out Roy's POV for his side
of this via my profile XD

Chapter
05

Jerking awake, Ed looked
down his bed at the door and the insistent knocking. He hadn't
realized that he'd dozed off, so it was a bit confusing to find
himself being woken up. Throwing back the blankets, Ed pulled his
watch out from his pocket and clicked open the cover to see that it
going on eleven o'clock.

Bewildered, Ed padded
over to the door and cracked it open. Blinking into the bright
hallway, Ed frowned at the sergeant in front of him. “Yes?”
he croaked, his voice raspy from sleep.

“Sir,
you have a phone call,” the man said, pointing to the phone
down the hall.

“Okay,
be there 'n a minute,” Ed informed the sergeant, closing the
door. Swatting at the light switch to turn on the overhead, Ed
fumbled to put his boots on. He felt so disoriented and...confused.
His brain seemed to be stuck in sleep mode, and he couldn't
understand why he was getting a call at this time of night.

Wiping the sleep out of
his eyes, Ed opened his dorm door without bothering to close it and
trudged down the hall to the communal phone. He noted with slight
confusion, and not a little bit of humor, that the shelf that he
broke on New Years had finally been replaced. The military was
really fast...if three weeks later could be called fast, but maybe
with a large organization, that was fast...guh! His mind was not up
to figuring out the finer points of the bureaucracy machinations
right now.

The receiver was resting
on the top of the phone box making Ed have to reach up to slightly
and pull it towards him. Sighing because he had to still reach up
even though he was almost eighteen, and he so too grew! Inches
counted! Ed fitted the phone to his ear. “Yeah?”

“Ed?”

What
the...Roy?
he wondered. The voice in his ear sounded slurred and weak, making
Ed wonder what Roy was doing. “Ah...yeah? Roy? Are
you...drunk?” he asked, incredulously. He'd never
seen Roy drunk, but then how could he explain how shitty Roy sounded
right now. There was a pause, and Ed wondered if he was even still
there.

“No...I've
just had a little bit, but I'm not drunk.”

“Okay...”
Ed smirked uncertainly at Roy assertion of his state of mind.
Clearly he didn't know that he did sound
drunk. “If you say so...” Ed conceded. He leaned back
into the wall to stare vaguely at the front doors. Very few people
were ever around at this time of night during the week, so he had the
hall to himself.

“I
just wanted to talk to you...”

Roy trailed off into
silence, as if he wanted to say more, but stopped himself.
“Okay...so...um...here I am...” He let his confusion
show in his voice, hoping to get an answer on why Roy had decided to
drink himself silly. Ed frowned at the wall opposite him, when Roy
began to mumble incoherently. “What's that? I didn't make
that out?”

“It's...it's
nothing... You know...you have such a nice voice.”

“Thanks.”
Ed quirked an eyebrow, folding his free hand up across his chest to
hook in the crook of his arm holding the phone. “Yours ain't
so bad either when you're not yelling at me,” said Ed. Roy
chuckled pleasantly in his ear, making Ed hold his breath at the
seductive quality of Roy's voice.

“Even
when you're yelling, I think you have a nice voice...but it's better
when you're not yelling. I guess that's why I wanted to hear your
voice tonight...”

Blinking
at the wall, Ed titled his head into the phone. He could just make
out the sound of glass on glass. Maybe he should just ask Roy about
his behavior and attitude towards him. He didn't seem to be pushing
him away right now, and he guessed Roy to be at home, so he wasn't
out tonight
with someone else. Ed found himself secretly wishing that Roy hadn't
gone out at all over the last three weeks, with anyone. What would
he do if he found out that Roy was cheating on him. He couldn't even
imagine. He really hoped he was wrong about that.

“Uh...Roy?”
Now that he'd decided to ask, he didn't know how.

“Hm...”

Ed had to hurry, Roy
sounded like he'd fall asleep any second now. “Don't you
lik—never mind...I mean...well...are you seeing—fuck!
What are you doing?” Ed finished lamely. He just couldn't do
it. If he put it out there, then he'd have to get an answer, and he
might not like what he heard. His stomach lurched painfully again,
reminding him of his anxiety. He was such a chicken!

“Listening
to your voice... I miss you.”

Ed's gut rolled, and he
frowned in pain.

“You've
been so distant lately...and I'm not sure...”

Ed paused as those words
sunk in. “I'm distant! What about you, bastard! You've been
giving me the fucking cold shoulder since New Years! What the fuck!”
Ed yelled, uncaring if he woke up anyone in the other dorm rooms or
not. He pushed himself away from the wall, and paced as far as the
cord would allow. He breathed hard in anger while waiting for Roy's
response.

The longer it took for
Roy to respond the more he fretted. Why was he taking his time to
answer? What was Roy hiding from him? Could he really have someone
on the side? Ed frowned at the floor, and his gut twisted painfully.

“You
were supposed to ask me out...remember? I've been waiting...”

Oh
shit...Roy... Ed
closed his eyes in shame. I'm
such an ass...
he silently berated himself. How could he ever doubt Roy.

“I
thought the no sex thing would remind you...but I guess not... It
doesn't matter, Ed. Just...never mind. I think I'm going to go to
bed now. I'm not feeling very good.”

“Wait!”
Ed yelled into the phone, but he was too late. The connection ended.
Quickly hanging up the phone, Ed fished through his pockets for the
money to call Roy back. Finding the appropriate coin, he lifted the
receiver and dialed Roy's number. He let it ring for five whole
minutes before depressing the cradle and summoning an operator.

He drummed his
fingertips on the small shelf as he waited impatiently for the
operator to pick up. What was taking them so damn long. He should
complain to the telephone company and tell them how shitty their
service is. Shifting his weight from foot to foot, Ed glared at the
rotary wheel. He was just about to hang up and try again with the
phone clicked.

“Yes,
honey?”
a bored female voice asked.

“I'm
having trouble connecting. Could you try for me,” he pleaded.
He knew he sounded very much like a kid right now, but he couldn't
help it.

“Of
course, dear,” the
operator said, seeming to sound much more concerned in response to
the tone of his voice.

After a moment the phone
began to ring again. Two minutes passed before the operator cut back
in.

“I'm
sorry, no one's answering.”

“Okay...”
Ed replaced the receiver, his hand continuing to rest on the handle.
He should go over there tonight, but...he didn't want to walk all
across town. He felt drained and tired. All this emotional stuff
really leached all his energy. If he waited until tomorrow he could
talk to Roy at the office.

Letting his hand slip
away from the phone to fall bonelessly at his side, Ed turned around
and dragged his feet back to his room. Closing the door with a
gentle shove, Ed leaned into it and closed his eyes. Letting his
head rest on the flimsy wood, he kicked off his boots to parts
unknown, and reached out blindly for the light switch.

With
a small growl, he cracked open his eyes when he couldn't seem to
locate it, and found that he was way off his mark and patting the
wall well below the switch. Plunging the room into darkness, Ed
trudged across the floor, pealing away clothes as he went. Sliding
back under the now cold blankets in only his boxers, he sighed. He
didn't want to be thinking about all of this
right now...his brain was too tired to process it all; at least for
the moment.

Rolling over to his side
to face the wall, Ed tucked his hands under his chin and curled his
legs up into his chest, relieving the constant gnawing pain in his
stomach. Somehow he convinced his body to let him rest and he fell
into a fitful sleep.

- - - -

Ed
walked down the hall of Central HQ an hour after after the offices
opened at seven. The few officers that knew of his preference to
come in later, did a double take to see him here, but he brushed past
them on his way to Roy's office. He planned on apologizing to Roy
for being an ass yet again. Why
on earth did Roy put up with me?
He wondered.

Stepping into Roy's
outer office, his eyes found and locked onto Riza's as she stood to
look at him.

“Edward?”
She looked at him quizzically, unused to seeing him here at eight
o'clock in the morning.

“Hey,
is Mustang 'round?” Ed asked without waiting for an answer he
crossed the floor, heading towards Roy's door.

“He's
not in there,” she said softly.

“Eh?”
Ed grunted, turning around to look at her again. “Where is he
then? Getting coffee?” He made to leave to head down to the
break room.

“Not
there either, Edward,” Hawkeye said.

“Well,
where then,” he said throwing his hands up in agitation and
whirling around to glare at Hawkeye.

“He's
called in sick, and I've already confirmed that he is indeed too ill
to be here today.”

“He's
sick?” he said softly, frowning. Hawkeye nodded and turned
back to her work. “Well, fuck,” he mumbled under his
breath as he left the office. He let his feet take him where they
willed it as his mind engaged in what he should do now. With Roy
gone, how could he apologize? Maybe...he could go over to his house,
and make him listen to what he had to say...

Roy had constantly told
him how to act, manners, and such, but he'd never gave much stock to
it...maybe it was time to tune in and show that he could be an adult
about this relationship. Raking a hand through his bangs, Ed sighed.

This
'togetherness' was really hard. It was easy when it was just him,
and he didn't have to worry about how what he said and did might
affect someone's feelings. Although there was some very...nice
perks associated with being in a relationship, such as cuddling. Who
knew that cuddling would be so addictive and...

Sighing
again, Ed stopped in front of a row of windows looking out onto the
front walk of Central HQ. He craved
touch, and didn't want anyone but Roy to be the one to touch him.
Over the six months that they had been together, Ed found
himself...sinking...it was the only way he could explain it. Maybe
it was love, maybe not, he wasn't sure, and asking Roy about it was
out of the question. He would not put himself on the line like that.
He was reckless, but not that
reckless.

Leaning his elbows on
the window sill, Ed let his forehead rest on the cold panes of glass.
He should bring something as a peace offering, to show that he
wasn't really mad with Roy. He was just confused by Roy's actions
towards him, but what could he bring?

He'd figure it out on
the walk over. It wasn't as cold as it has been the last few weeks,
so he wouldn't mind the exercise, and on the way maybe he'd think
about what to bring. Satisfied with his plan of action, Ed pushed
off the window and continued towards the front entrance.

- - - -

The coffee was almost
too hot to carry in his left hand, but Ed made do. If he got
distracted while holding it in his right hand he might unconsciously
crush the cup and make a fine mess. Many people didn't realize that
auto-mail took a lot of concentration to control as well as he did.
If he was holding something delicate he could, and had, break
whatever was in his hand at the time if he became distracted with
other things around him. It was just lucky that he was such a fine
alchemist and could repair anything he'd inadvertently broke.

Banishing his musing to
contemplate for another day, Edward hurried down the sidewalk to
Roy's apartment. Leaping up the front steps, Ed transferred the
paper bag from his right to his left hand and brought up his gloved
auto-mail to strike the door, knocking three times. When he couldn't
immediately hear the sound of Roy's footsteps behind the door, he
knocked again, this time more insistently.

Growing frustrated from
standing outside when it was warm inside, Ed banged again. “Roy,
open up dammit! I know you're in there!” he called through the
door, pitching his voice loud enough to carry through the wood. He
was about to continue his banging when the door was pulled open
abruptly.

Roy blinked at him
blearily and squinted against the early morning sunshine. Lifting
his index finger up to his lips, he silently shushed Ed and moved
aside to allow him to enter.

Ed snorted in humor at
Roy. “Why are you telling me to be quiet? It's not like you
have anyone over.” Ed smirked at Roy as he pulled the door
closed. “Here, I don't know if you feel like it, but I got you
coffee and a muffin,” said Ed as he moved confidently into the
kitchen, feeling comfortable enough in Roy's house to do so without
permission.

Roy hissed at him from
behind as he trailed after Ed. The clunking of his boots over the
hardwood floors reminded him that he'd forgotten to remove his boots
when he'd entered...oops! Maybe Roy wouldn't notice the slip.

“Very
thoughtful...” whispered Roy. Ed glanced over his shoulder and
paused. He watched as Roy leaned back into the wall looking quite
green.

“What's
wrong with you? Did you catch the flu?” Ed wondered, frowning.
Without waiting for Roy to answer, he placed the coffee and muffin
on the kitchen counter and turning,
hopped
up to sit slouched with his arms on his thighs.

Roy glanced at the
coffee resting beside his left thigh, and then up into Ed's face. A
small smile tugged at Ed's lips in sympathy. Shuffling forward
slowly, Roy took the paper cup gingerly in his hand, and took a
cautious sip.

“Thanks,”
whispered Roy. Smiling slightly, he mumbled, “I'm going back
to bed.”

Ed frowned as Roy turned
around with the coffee and staggered towards the hallway. Was
Roy...where was he going? He still hadn't said anything to apologize
yet. “Well, wait!” Ed called out in near panic, raising
his hand out as if to stop Roy from leaving him here on the kitchen
counter. “Are you kicking me out?”

Wincing,
Roy turned back to face him. “I'm not kicking you out; I just
need to lay down... You don't have to stay in the kitchen...
Just...just whisper...”

Watching Roy's slow
progress around the corner, Ed finally launched himself off the
counter to land with a thunk. Ed trailed behind Roy to stand in the
doorway of the bedroom. The blinds were firmly turned against the
sunlight, and as an added measure, a dark blanket had been thrown
over them to decrease the chances of any wayward shafts of light from
finding their way into Roy's sanctuary.

Roy shuffled over to his
bed, and plopped down on the edge of the mattress next to the
nightstand. Pushing a glass and a half empty bottle of whiskey
aside, Roy set the coffee down. Swinging his legs around, Roy lay
back into the center of the mattress with a sigh.

“Why
were you drinking last night?” asked Ed, his voice made soft as
he whispered. “Something happen?” Ed looked down at Roy
as he crossed the room, studying his profile. Turning his attention
to the bottle of whiskey, Ed shook his head at what Roy had foolishly
done to himself.

“Ed...
I don't know. I don't really remember. I remember the first couple
of drinks, I usually have at least one at the end of the day, two if
it's a bad day, but really, after that I don't remember.”

“Hmm...”
acknowledged Ed, not meeting Roy's eyes as he tried to figure out
what could have possibly have gone through Roy's head last night. He
found that he didn't want to think and theorize right now.
“Um...Roy? Do you...” How
the hell do people deal with this shit,
thought Ed in frustration. Why couldn't they just know
what the other person was thinking so that the struggle to get along
wouldn't be such a...struggle!

Heaving
a mighty sigh, Ed ran his left hand through his bangs. The only
thing he wanted was to be in Roy's arms, but he was worried about how
the older man would act if he asked him. Dammit!
I'm not a wuss!
he told himself. Just do it! “Can I lay down with you?”
he asked uncertainly. He didn't care that a note of pleading wormed
its way from him. He wanted the reassurance of touch to re-establish
their relationship.

“I
would like that...” whispered Roy.

Trying to hide the
overwhelming wash of relief at not being turned away, Ed's mouth
quirked upwards on one side; the only open display he couldn't
control. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he kicked off his boots and
pulled off his jacket, dumping it unceremoniously on the floor.
Lying next to Roy, Ed buried his face in the other man's neck,
inhaling his unique scent.

“I
really missed this... Why are you being so mean to me lately?”
questioned Ed. He hadn't meant to ask that. It just spilled out.
He'd just wanted to enjoy the warmth Roy had to offer...but since it
was out there now, he was eager to hear what Roy would say.

“Me?”
Roy muttered, tightening his arms around Ed. “Who is it who
has been yelling and stomping around?”

“Yeah,
but why are you all, like...I don't know...weird all of a sudden;
pushing me away and shit. I don't get it, what'd I do?”
The last word came out slightly cracked and full of emotion, but Ed
didn't seem to notice. He hid his face within Roy's shoulder and
neck, unable to meet Roy's eyes. His stomach twisted in nervous
expectation for his answer.

The soothing motion of
Roy's hand on his back seemed inconsistent with what Ed feared might
come out of Roy's mouth. He was afraid that Roy wasn't really into
to this as much as he was. Afraid that Roy was just using him. He
was just afraid, and it was irrational fear...he hoped.

“I...”
began Roy. Ed felt him stir slightly. “I wasn't...”
Roy twisted, and placed a kiss on Ed's forehead, making Ed close his
eyes and lean into the gesture as Roy then rested his chin on Ed's
forehead. “I was waiting for you to pursue me, to ask me out,
like we'd talked about,” said Roy, chuckling ever so softly.
“But it just never happened. I thought maybe you decided it
was too much trouble, or maybe if you weren't getting any sex then it
wasn't worth your time. I didn't mean for you to feel pushed
away...”

“Shithead...”
mumbled Ed, his voice full of relief. “I didn't think that
you'd stop wanting to be around me, I just thought it'd all be the
same 'cept for the sex... You really fucked with my mind you know
that?” confessed Ed, leaning back to look into Roy's eyes for a
second before burrowing back into the pale neck, gobbling up his
smell. He reached over and worked his hand under Roy's pajama top to
rub the skin there. It wasn't even a thought out gesture, but one
born of habit and familiarity.

“I
never stopped wanting to be around you. The longer I didn't have
you, the more I wanted you...” Roy sighed, and then moaned.
“At least I got to fuck with something that was you...”

“Phft!”
snorted Ed. He couldn't help it. It was just so unexpected. “Can
you, like, not be a pervert for two minutes please,” chuckled
Ed. “So...I did try to plan a date...” said Ed after a
moments pause. “The other day, that's what I was working on
when you surprised me.” The hand under Roy's shirt worked its
way a little lower...fucking eh? It was getting hard not to think
about that while Roy was so close. Ed smirked and fought half
heartily against his body's reaction to the new idea that had been
planted.

“That's
a lot of paper to plan a date...” Roy said after a pause,
moaning in pleasure at Ed's wandering, kneading touch.

“You're
a complicated guy,” Ed murmured as he shuffled closer towards
Roy's prone body. Titling his head upwards to bump his nose against
Roy's jawline, Ed slipped his tongue past his lips and teased the
area just below Roy's ear.

“You
know...this isn't fair...you're trying to take advantage of me while
I'm sick. I haven't even gotten my date yet...”

Ed
arched into Roy's kneading hand on his back in pleasure. “I'm
a teenager. A very horny teenager. Give me a break! I don't want
to stop. If you want to make me, go ahead,” he said against
Roy's neck. Stretching further, Ed pulled Roy's earlobe into his
warm mouth, running the tip of his tongue along the edge making Roy
moan.
Roy
could make such sweet sounds when he wasn't paying attention to
himself and reigning himself in. Ed lived to hear those coveted
sounds. If he ever did get a good date with Roy, and got to be top,
he'd make Roy make all sorts of erotic sounds all night.

“I
don't think I could stop you if I wanted to, but, Ed...I really don't
feel well...I don't know how much I'd be able to contribute...”

“Damn,
and I'm 'bout ready to burst. Just jerk me off, please. I can't
take this,” Ed pleaded, finally closing the small distance
between their bodies to let Roy know just how much he wanted this.
His fully matured erection throbbed painfully in the tight confines
of his pants. “I'll do you after if you want me to. It's not
like that's really sex, right?” said Ed hopefully. Roy shook
his head, making Ed frown.

“It
just depends on how you look at it...” After a slight pause,
Roy reached down to fumble with Ed's belt buckle. In exasperation,
he pulled his hand away. “Take your belt and pants off,”
he ordered.

Grinning manically, Ed
sat up and attacked his belt, quickly pulling down the zipper of his
pants with a groan of pleasure as the pressure was finally released
from his erect organ. “Sex is intercourse, there's no
intercourse here...” husked Ed, his breathing quickening.
Leaning back, Ed wiggled his pants and boxers down and flung them
across the room, his shirt mere seconds behind. Now full naked, Ed
turned his attention to Roy's pajama's.

“Intercourse
is intercourse, Ed. Sex can be different things. Sex can be
intercourse, it can be anal, oral, solo... It can be a noun or a
verb. It can just refer to giving into those urges and making
yourself cum. If you only limit your definition of sex to
intercourse, you loose a lot...” Roy said, shivering slightly
from Ed's brisk hands removing his clothing. “So, you see, it
really depends.” Roy reached out to touch the side of his
chest. “A hand job is sex in the loosest form of the word...”

“Shut
up,” rumbled Ed, leaning in to attack Roy's lips. While
keeping Roy's mouth engaged in a more pleasant pursuit then
lecturing, Ed caressed his way down to the top of Roy's pajama
bottoms. Ed noted with satisfaction that Roy's breathing had
dramatically increased. Finally divesting Roy of the only remaining
barrier with a flick, Ed reclaimed Roy's mouth hungrily.

“This
seems a lot for non-sex,” mumbled Roy around Ed's demanding
kiss.

Roy dragged his hand up
Ed's back making him shiver in anticipation. Roy's other hand
trailed up the front of his chest to brush teasingly past his nipple.

“Well
you,” gasped Ed at the light touch on his chest. “Made
me wait so fucking long...fuck yeah!” groaned Ed, straddling
Roy's pelvis. He rewarded Roy's participation by leaning down to nip
playfully at his neck and collarbone.

Roy moaned. “It's
not like you didn't have your hand, Ed... Dammit...that feels so
good...”

Ed felt a tug at the end
of his braid, and then Roy was trying to card through its length
awkwardly, while the other hand wondered down to his ass to knead
suggestively. Sitting back so that he could look down at Roy, Ed
shook out his hair so that it hung loose down to the middle of his
back.

“I
like it better when it's you. It's always better when it's you. I
fucking love it when you touch me,” Ed confessed, licking his
lips at the sight of Roy smiling below him. Slowly rolling his hips,
Ed grazed his erection against Roy's lower stomach in a silent plea
for him to touch him. Running his hands down Ed's ribs, Roy brought
his hands close, but didn't touch him just yet.

“It's
always better with you too...” Roy said, finally bringing his
hands to Ed's erection to stroke slowly.

“Holy
shit! Yeah, like that...” moaned Ed, closing his eyes against
the sensations. “Don't stop...” he said, breathing hard.
He wasn't going to last very long, he could already feel that he was
starting to head towards his peak, and with Roy rubbing the inside of
his thigh to add to the sensations it just made him want to finish
fast.

“I
want to hear your voice, Ed... I want to hear how you like it...”
said Roy.

Gods, Roy was going to
be the death of him. Asking for him to vocalize his pleasure sent a
thrill down to his already hard flesh. “Harder, Roy...I'm so
close...” groaned Ed, throwing his head back to thrust into
Roy's fist. His request was granted and Roy began to stroke him
harder and faster, with the other hand reaching around to grab his
ass.

“Roy!”
groaned Ed as he reached his peak, and fell forward bonelessly onto
Roy's chest, trying to catch his breath. Ed could feel Roy shifted
under him before his arm wrapped around Edward's back.

“You
looked very sexy...”

Ed smiled into Roy's
chest and sighed. “I needed that...” It was a few more
moments before Ed could work up the energy to return the favor. “Do
you...?” Ed asked as he rolled off of Roy and wrapped his hand
around Roy's erection.

“Mmmm...I
would...” Roy said, watching Ed expectantly.

Licking his lips again,
Ed pushed himself forward to nibble his way down Roy's creamy chest.
Pausing at his navel, Ed glanced up at Roy, making sure he had his
full attention before continuing. With a seductive flick of his
tongue, Ed licked at the globes of cum that had gotten on Roy's
stomach, and he looked back at Roy. He just caught the tail end of a
grin before Roy let out a small moan.

Licking the rest of the
cum from Roy's stomach, Ed finally kissed his way lower. “Tell
me what you want, Roy,” Ed husked, his eyes smoldering as he
looked up into Roy's own bed room eyes.

With a grin laced with
lust, Roy gripped the back of Ed's head gently. “I want to see
you go down on me... I want you to suck me off, Ed... I want to see
my cock in your mouth...”

Smirking, Ed took a hold
of Roy's length and brought his mouth down to the flick his tongue
along the top of his head, licking up the wetness. He'd worked hard
to improve his fellatio skills. Roy loved it when he went down on
him, but in the beginning he'd flat out refused. Dragging the flat
of his tongue down his length to make it slick, Ed took the tip of
the erection into his mouth and sucked hard. He was pleased to hear
Roy pant loudly and knead his head when he dropped down and took as
much of Roy's length as he could manage into his mouth.

“Oh,
yes... Just like that...” moaned Roy, rocking his hips with
each exhale into Ed.

Delighting in Roy's
cries and the insistent touch on his head, Ed decided that he'd give
Roy a little treat as part of his apology. Relaxing his throat, he
allowed Roy to thrust as deeply as he wanted into his willing mouth.
Moaning loudly, Roy gripped the back of his head tightly.

“I'm
going to cum...”

Roy thrust a few more
times, and exhaling loudly, he released his pent up lust into Ed's
mouth. Swallowing his seed, Ed stayed with him through the small
aftershocks. The small breathy gasps that Roy uttered each time Ed
worked the back of his throat, thrilled him to no end, until Roy
finally went limp with a big moan. Wiping a hand across his mouth,
Ed sat back on his heels and grinned at the state that Roy was in.
Crawling up, he lay down, snuggling into Roy.

“So,
how about no intercourse until a successful date, but hand and mouth
privileges are allowed,” Ed bargained.

“Okay...”
Roy placed a kiss on Ed's forehead. “I spoil you too much I
think...” said Roy, dragging his hand up Ed's back, and the
other to his own forehead, squeezing his eyes shut in pain.

“I
don't think you spoil me,” said Ed with a pout. He couldn't
think of one time that Roy had spoiled him. “Was that too much
for you? You didn't seem to mind...” fretted Ed, frowning with
worry.

“I'm
still hungover...but I don't regret it. It was good. Very
good. Thank you, Ed, and yes I do spoil you. I give into you more
then anyone...”
Roy paused in thought. “But
I don't regret that either.”

Resting his chin on top
of his hand, on Roy's chest, Ed smiled lazily as he studied Roy.
“You should call in sick more often. We could do this all day.
Hey, have you ever spoiled anyone else? Like, before me?” he
asked. Roy opened his eyes and patted his hair. Ed loved having his
hair stoked and touched.

“I
don't think calling in sick more often would be a good idea. Hawkeye
actually came by to 'check on me' after I called in. Sometimes I
wonder who's the commanding officer in that office.” Roy
chuckled and looked down at Ed fondly.

“No...
no one like you. There's never been anyone like you. I've never
treated anyone like you before. You are...” Roy reached out
and caressed Ed's cheek. “You are special... no one else has
been able to make me want to give in so much.”

Ed felt his heart
swelled painfully at Roy's confession. So, he really did care for
him, he was glad. Sometimes he just wasn't sure. Roy reached out
and moved a strand of hair that had fallen into his eyes.

“I've
never spoiled anyone like you...” Roy said again.

Ed
blinked contentedly at Roy. It was good to know that he didn't have
any competition, and that he was the only
one Roy had ever been kind with. When he thought about all the
people Roy must have been with over the years he felt jealousy and
hurt. Why he should feel that way, when they had nothing to do with
him or this thing he had with Roy was a little bit confusing.
Really, why did Roy want him anyway?

“Why'd
you like me in the first place...I wasn't very nice to you in the
beginning...” wondered Ed letting his head roll across his
fingers to regard Roy at an angle. He blinked and mumbled, “I
always wondered that.”

“At
first...? You mean as in...why did I pursue you?”

“Yeah,
'cause you never told me what you like about me,” explained Ed
as he laid on his side, resting his head on Roy's shoulder, and
curling up into Roy's embrace. He reached his arm across Roy's chest
and trailed his fingertips through the hair at the base of Roy's
neck.

Roy cleared his throat.
“Well...actually at first I just wanted to fuck you. Sorry.”

Ed
couldn't move, his eyes widened in horror. He felt Roy shift under
him. What
the...
Ed tried to make himself breath normally.

“You
had so much energy that I was extremely curious if it would extend to
your sex life, and of course, you didn't seem to like me very much,
so that really added to the thrill of the hunt...”

That's it! “What!”
Ed yelled, sitting up angrily to glare down at Roy. “You're
fucking kidding, right?”

“Just
wait,” Roy said, grabbing onto Ed's arm. “And don't
shout...”

“I'll
shout if I wanna shout,” Ed informed Roy, his struggled to
contain his emotions and not show how hurt he was. He gripped Roy's
hand that griped his arm and pried it off. “I can't believe
what a fucking pervert you are!” he said, looking away.

“Dammit,
Edward... Yes, I'm a pervert, but you know my reputation...I usually
only went out with people to have sex with them. How many people do
you think I screwed before you? How many am I still with, or even
better, how many did I stay with longer then a week? Now, if you'll
just let me speak, you'll get the answer to your question.”

Taking a shaky breath,
Ed glared daggers at Roy, but made no move to leave from his position
on the bed. He'd at least hear what Roy had to say, but if he didn't
like it, he'd leave. “I don't even want to think about how
many people you've had sex with...” he said looking at the
wall, rather then having to look at Roy.

With a sigh, Roy
continued, “Ed... It was during the time that I spent trying
to get you that I started to realize how much I enjoyed being with
you. You weren't like anyone I'd ever been with. You were smart and
you kept me on my toes. It was invigorating to be around you.
Despite our differences you became an addiction for me, even before I
ever succeed in getting you into bed. By the time we actually had
sex, I already wanted to be with you for more then that. Yes, I
wanted you for sex first, but that's not the only reason I want you
now... Why should the past matter?”

“I
was just curious,” Ed said petulantly, and let his eyes drift
away to stare at the pillows rather then having to look at Roy's
face. Roy's hand reached up and touched the side of Ed's face, but
he still resolutely would not meet Roy's gaze.

“I
might not have told you before, but...you're becoming an adult and I
think that you can handle the truth,” said Roy running a thumb
softly across Ed's pressed lips. “I'm sorry that the truth
isn't very romantic, but you should be happy that you also have the
honor of being the only one I've ever been honest with... Please
don't go...” plead Roy. His hand fell back to the bed.

Swallowing hard, Ed
blinked against the sudden emotion, making his eyes water. He
frowned at himself for getting so emotional and bowed his head,
hiding within his hair as he tired to reign in his chaotic thoughts.
Did Roy even know what he had just said to him. Flaunting all his
past flings like that... He worked the bed sheets through his
fingers in his distress.

“Honored...?”
Ed asked, testing the word. Roy was such a... Ed pressed his lips,
keeping his head bowed. “I'd rather you weren't so blunt...it
hurts,” he whispered. “You could have said it nicer, I
don't like...” To
get hurt, I've been hurt so much already. Why do you do that? Why
can't you see?
Ed pleaded silently. “Never mind.” Ed resumed his spot,
resting his head on Roy's shoulder, stiffly.

Wrapping his arms around
Ed's stiff body, Roy squeezed him close. The silence stretched out
painfully, making Ed wonder if Roy was going to say anything at all.

“Nothing
I say is right, is it? Nothing I do...” Roy sighed. “I
don't always think of saying things the nice way with you, Ed, and
when I do act 'nice' you think I'm treating you like a girl or
something. I'm not sure what you want from me...” Roy said,
petting Ed's hair as he talked.

“Like
I know?” Ed said in frustration. “It's all new to me,
you know.” Ed sighed. He only had dim memories of his mother
and father together, and with no other frame of reference on how he
should act in a relationship, he had to wing it. “I don't know
how to act well for anything...” Roy placed another kiss on
his forehead. A gesture that he was actually becoming quite fond
off.

“I
didn't mean to hurt you...”

“Yeah,
okay...” Ed said, forgiving Roy, and himself. “Forget I
even brought it up.” He let all the tension ebb out of his
body and allowed himself to enjoy the warmth again. He let his eyes
close.

“Ed?”
Roy said, after a few quiet moments.

“Hmm?”
Ed murmured sleepily.

“Why
me...?”

“Eh?”
Ed lifted his head and looked up into Roy's face perplexed.

“You
asked me why I liked you... in essence why I chose you... Well, why
me? I mean... Like you said we didn't get along...” Roy said
glancing down at Ed. “You don't have to answer. Never mind
that I even brought it up...” Roy averted his eyes.

Ed
let his head fall back as he considered Roy's question. He smirked
softly as he thought about Roy, the man as opposed to Roy, the
commander, something he wasn't able to distinguish between sometimes.
Roy had clawed his way into his life...for apparently less then
stellar reasons, but he was here none the less. So, why had
he finally given in, and allowed Roy to kiss him that first time on
the floor of Roy's apartment?

He wasn't one to
question his motives, rather he'd go with what his gut told him at
the time, and to hell with the consequences. So why Roy?

“Well...”
Ed began, feeling out the answer. “I like your eyes, and your
voice is...shiver inspiring...but I didn't really notice until after
we were together. I guess I was attracted to your power at first.”
Ed laughed softly. “I love the way your uniform swirls around
you when you snap your fingers, it's very sexy,” he said,
closing his eyes in relaxation.

“I...”
Roy shifted. “I don't know what to say... That's
so...flattering. Thank you.”

“Yeah,
you get off on that shit, I know you do,” sighed Ed, allowing
himself to relax completely. Roy really did like to get complements.
He liked watching Roy preen, it was really cute.

“I
just didn't expect something so eloquent,” said Roy, pulling Ed
even closer.

“Hmm...bet
you never knew I had it in me,” said Ed, around a yawn.
Eloquent eh? Yeah, maybe for him it was. He'd actually taken time
to think about it, so yeah, it was. Maybe he should do that more
often. Then he wouldn't get in trouble so much.

“Learn
something new everyday,” murmured Roy, sleepily.

Ed
looked up at Roy's face as he drifted asleep.
Using
his feet, he caught and dragged up the blanket, before drifting off
as well.

--To Be Continued--
- 4
- 5
- 6
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The More I Learn to Care For You: Ed's POV