Maybe Angels

Author's Notes:

Disclaimers: Don't own... I doubt my manga, posters and DVDs count as any kind of copyrights holding, so I won't even go there. I don't own anything from Fleetwood Mac, except their greatest hits CD, so... yeah. No money, so no suing, ok?

A/N: Well, wasn't last chapter interesting? Yes, Wufei aged approximately five months while Duo was away. That means that Duo spent five Heaven weeks with Giselle and Jean-Paul trying to avoid his enigmatic charge. Wufei will age more in this chapter, for the sake of moving along with the plot.

Dedication: To my Tara-sissy, for being so great and kawaii. To Derva, because when she sees her name in the headers, she gets all excited and says I make her happy. ~_^ To Sara, for just being you and making me smile when we talk.

Symbols: *~*~* change in POV, scene, or time
*~~~* minor change of scene or flashback

*~~~~~~~*
Can you hear me
Calling out your name?
You know I've fallen
And I don't know what to say.
I'll speak a little louder
I'll even shout.
You know I'm proud
And I can't get the words out.
O~oh I, I wanna be with you everywhere.
O~oh I, I wanna be with you everywhere.
Something's happening,
Happening to me.
My friends say
I'm acting peculiarly.
Come on, baby.
We better make a start.
You better make it soon
Before you break my heart.
O~oh I, I wanna be with you everywhere.
O~oh I, I wanna be with you everywhere.

~ Everywhere, by Fleetwood Mac
*~~~~~~~*

Everywhere

Oh yes, after the day at the hospital with the idiotic doctor, I was not a happy being to be around. Eventually, after a week or so, Giselle and Jean-Paul gave me my own space, and *no* one from my group of 'friends' tried bothering. I spent most of my waking hours pacing and muttering to myself. Every time my eyes were closed for longer than a few moments, I would see Wufei, and I knew that it was getting me nowhere.

Finally, fed up with the whole situation after three more weeks in agony, I went to God.

She seemed to be expecting me when I walked up to her throne, and dismissed all of the Seraphim, including Metatron, so we were completely alone. "What may I do for you, my Playful One?" She asked, Her usual smile not calming me.

"I cannot do this," I said, feeling ashamed at my own weakness with a child.

"Do what, Duo?" She cocked Her head to one side, as if to try and better understand me through body language. "Go on without Solo? Deal with Heero and Quatre's obvious attraction to you? Or your obvious obsession with Chang Wufei?"

Let me just say this now: I HATE WHEN GOD DOES THAT!!! She *always* knows what is bothering someone, just by reading their hearts, and yet, She makes us figure these things out on our own. My former charges always complained 'Why doesn't God help me if He's so powerful, all-knowing, and good?' Well, things don't work like that. She has this odd sense of humour, but still... When frustrated to the point of frayed nerves, Her attitude is *not* helpful.

"I dunno. All of it, I guess," I sighed, flexing my wings around my body, as if to comfort myself. Looking into Her eyes, I felt so much pain and frustration, and I began to cry. "You made us perfect. You made us beautiful. You made us wise. You made us kind. WHY? Everyone of the other angels around seems to have made the transition better than I have. Heero is well without Odin, but I cannot coexist peacefully without Solo, My Lord. Everyday, the ache I feel grows larger, and it only gets worse as I watch every charge I have wither and die. The pain is so much..." I stopped, unable to speak anymore. The knot I had my throat made it too difficult.

"Oh, Duo... I made you as perfectly as I could, so I could have you all around me. You're all different in many, many ways, and that is one of the many reasons why I love you so. Duo, Solo made his choice. I am *very* sorry that he did not choose to stay with us. It saddens me to no end, but I cannot undo what has been done."

"But..."

"Yes, I am God. I think that was not the best way to say that. I *can* undo what has been done, but it would not be the best thing possible. Look around us. What do you see?"

I did as she commanded, and all I saw was beauty, laughter, and joy. The souls of the departed were as intermingled with the angels, as we were on Earth. There was not one discontented being in Heaven, except myself.

"Joy..." I whispered, feeling Her arms wrap around my being.

"And what does that make you feel?" Her voice was low, as if we were human lovers.

"Sadness..."

"Why? Why are you sad, my Playful One?"

"Because, I do not fit in. I feel there is someone else that would make me..." I started, not knowing where to continue on to.

"Someone else that would make you?"

"Whole. Joyful. Beautiful. Anything."

She pulled away, Her smile planted firmly across Her pleasing face. "And perhaps there is, but you must not dwell on it. Now, how are Giselle and Jean-Paul? I have not had them run to me, yelling at me to make you a muse, lately."

I hung my head in shame. "I do not really know. I have been sulking these past few weeks," I whispered, disgusted in my weakness and inattentive behaviour towards two of my favorite beings in the universe. This was how badly my obsession had become.

"I can reassign you, if you wish," God offered, as if reading my mind.

"NO!"

She laughed. "Alright, I won't. What do you want then? This is the only time you will have this option, so think about it wisely."

I was stunned. Never in all of the thousands, perhaps millions, of years that I had been in existence had I ever heard of such an offer from God to one of Her angels. There were so many things I could have asked for at that moment, but the voice of reason won out.

"May I have some time to think it over? I... I have no idea what I want right now."

"You may, but remember to choose wisely," She said, placing a warm and loving kiss on my forehead before turning to sit back at Her throne.

I left Her throne area as the Seraphim returned, determined to think over this decision carefully. What does an angel ask from God when they aren't happy with Heaven?

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I walked around my usual haunts of Heaven, and soon, I ran into Hilde, reading a book. A quick glance told me that it was of the Book of Life from one of her latest charges. She and I had never really been as close as the others were, but we got along well enough, and I was *pretty* sure that she wasn't going to go odd on me. You know, like try to jump me or rip my head off. So, taking a deep breath, I moved closer to her and cleared my throat, to let her know that she had company.

Her dark head shot up, and a bright smile graced her pleasant features. "Well, hello, Duo. I didn't think that you would be around anyone but the muses until Wufei was ready for you," she said politely.

Stifling a grimace at my charge's name, I smiled. "Well, I was just talking to Our Lord for a bit."

She nodded, and looked away for a moment. I turned my thoughts to what we could possibly talk about when my mouth just opened and words spilled out. "Hilde, what do you do when you wait for charges to age?"

"I suppose it's nothing as fun as what you do. I normally I read books from my previous charges, or I find the ones that are up here. I usually spend years just catching up with former charges or remembering the 'good old days,' as they say." She turned her big blue eyes to me. "Why do you ask? We all know about Jean-Paul and Giselle, and how you seem to shun us for those thirteen years."

That comment caused me to laugh nervously. "It's nothing personal, Hill, but... I dunno. I get bored, and they let me play around with them. We hardly have charges at the same time. I don't mean to shun you guys..." I trailed off, feeling horrible for neglecting everyone. Maybe that was why we weren't really close. It was my fault.

"Oh, Duo, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel bad," she said, placing a hand on top of one of my own. "We just miss you sometimes. That's all."

"Hilde, what...?" I stopped, not knowing if she was the right person to talk to about the question that was starting to burn a hole throughout my whole being. I heard a soft swoosh as she closed the book and it disappeared.

"Yes?" she inquired sweetly. What the hell did I have to lose by asking her what she would do.

"What would you ask for if God said that She would give you one thing you wanted?" I blurted out.

"What do you mean?" Her face was a mixture of humour and confusion.

I sighed, and thought of an easier way to explain it. "Ok, say that God told you that you could have *one*, and only one, thing that you wanted. What would you ask for?"

"Hmmm... I don't know," she said, her face growing serious as a pensive look stole over her. "There are so many things. I suppose it would be fun to be human for a while. They get to do so much. Like eat, drink, touch each other, give birth, make love... I suppose that's what I would want, but not for a whole lifetime." She stopped, and looked at me. "I think it would be sort of dull to live a full human lifetime."

"Is that all?" Her answer struck some cord within me, but I quieted it. "You wouldn't want to have one of your old companions back? Not even Olga?"

Hilde flinched as if I had smacked her. "I... I don't know. Duo, Olga made her choice, and she has to pay the consequences. I miss her, like no one would understand, but... Things are different now... I..." She stopped talking, and a large tear fell from her eyes.

Tentatively, I wrapped an arm around her, and held her shaking form as she cried tears that she had been holding in for countless years. Maybe I should explain about Olga. Hilde and Olga were as close as Solo and I had been, constantly together, playing, watching animals, pranking on the other angels - the Seraphim mostly. Since the time of the Fall, Hilde had calmed down quite a bit, although sometimes, she and Quatre where a deadly force to go up against. Many an angel had suffered at Hill and Q's hands, but they were well liked.

She cried for a few more minutes, and then sat up, wiping her eyes with her hands. "Thank you," she whispered.

Watching and holding Hilde as she cried made me realize how lonely I actually was. I mean, I had friends, sort of, but no one as close as Solo was. Something told me that no other angel or muse would ever replace the ache in my soul that his absence left. Right then, I felt more like an outsider than ever, and it killed me.

I kissed her head, and hugged her tightly. "Thank you," I whispered before moving away from her. I made my way towards where most of the souls of the eternally blessed dead were, searching out the one who was my favorite of all charges.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I found him surrounded by many other souls, all sitting around him, listening to his thickly accented voice as it rolled over them like sun-sweetened honey. I smiled as his brick-red skin seemed to shimmer in the lights that surrounded us all. He was in his element - preaching non-violence, tolerance, and love amongst all humans. He hardly noticed when the souls around him turned, staring agape at me. I waved, and finally, he turned his overly large head to see me.

Mahatma Gandhi. Real name, Mohandas K. Gandhi. Spiritual leader of India during the time of the second World War of Earth. Inspiration for many other men who preached the ways of non-violent conflict-resolution. And the only other person I could actually talk to besides the twins.

I smiled at him, and he gave in kind, quickly dismissing the others around us. When we were alone, his face grew serious. "Well, my friend, it has been a long time since we last spoke," he said, no bitterness or sorrow in his deep voice.

"Yes, it has," I replied.

"So, what brings you to see me with this look of impending sorrow surrounding you?"

I laughed. "You know, I always told you that you were as bad as God is about reading me like a book."

"Is it my fault that when you smile, your eyes scream in pain?" He waved a hand in front of him.

"No, I suppose not," I whispered, taking a look at the one charge I had ever talked to on a constant basis. We had been close when he was alive, and it was killing me to be near him then, even though he was in no pain, and would never fear death again, seeing as how he was already dead. "Mahatma?"

"No, no, Duo, you must call me Mohandas, or... What is the name you gave me when I was alive?"

"Guru," I said, snickering at the memory.

"Yes. Guru. You must call me that again."

"Fine. Guru, what would you ask of God if She gave you one wish? What could you possibly want?" I asked.

"Me? I want for nothing except companionship, and that I have. Now, you on the other hand, old friend, have been obsessed with humans since the Creation, or so you have told me. For you, I would ask God to give you a taste of what it is like to live a full, and fulfilling, life on Earth," he said, sounding like the wise old sage that he was. I allowed a bitter smile to cross my face.

"Do you remember me telling you about Solo?"

"Ah, yes. The angel that was your soul-companion?"

"Yes..."

"I do. What about him?"

"Well, recently, I have been feeling his absence more strongly than normal. I miss him, and there is nothing I can do about it."

"Is there a reason for this?" he asked, his voice full of curiosity, which made me laugh bitterly.

"I guess... I have a new charge," I said, trying to ignore the faint pull I felt. I would *not* go to see Wufei until it was time.

"Ah, so, what is it about this new charge?"

"He has eyes like yours, Guru... But as they are now, not as they were as a child. He's only a baby, and he knows me and notices me right away if I am near him. When... When I look at him, I feel this pull on my very being that clouds my mind until there is nothing there but this child and myself. I cannot touch him until the appropriate time, or I will be reassigned. Poor Quatre and Trowa would have to deal with Dorothy, I think, and I would have Une and Iria..." I shuddered. Une is just as crazy, if not more, as Dorothy. She delights in making others uncomfortable.

"When was this child born?" he asked, voice sounding deep in thought.

"In Earth time, it would eight months ago, I suppose."

"And you noticed this the night of his birth?"

"Yes..."

"I have only heard of this occasion happening one time before. With an angel and her charge that she eventually ended up becoming human for and marrying..."

"Yes, I know. There is only one case in the entirety of Heaven and Earth where an angel left Heaven to be with a charge. And there was an uproar when she died. It took God ten days to figure out where the poor woman's soul would go, and what she would be considered after she died. I've already had this discussion with the twins," I said, depressed at what he was saying.

"Perhaps, Duo, that this child is your new soul-companion, or what we humans refer to as a soul-mate."

"How, Guru? The boy is only a child, and besides that, he is a boy. I am... myself."

"And?"

"I mean, look at me! I have always appeared to other charges in a masculine form before."

"Except when you were interacting with charges that found it easier to talk to you in a feminine form."

"Yes, but those were few and far between, and every time I have seen Wufei I have been in this form you see now, only muted." I was on the verge of yelling in my confusion and frustration.

"Wufei? That is the boy's name?"

Just hearing Mahatma say *my* Wufei's name made the pull that I had been ignoring up to that point become stronger. I spoke of the richness of the Guru's voice, and at that it struck me to the core with that foreign word falling like water from his lips. I nodded, mute in my attempt to refuse the call of my charge.

"It is a nice name for a boy... Have you spoken to God about this predicament?"

"She *knows*! She has told me to stay away from him, and yet She sent me to help Quatre with the child." I let loose a growl. "I can't think of anything to do to resist."

"You will, Duo. You will, but in the meantime, why not stay and speak with old charges, old and forgotten friends, and make some new friends. Hmm?"

I looked at him, and saw a cunning edge in his eyes. "Did you have something in mind?" I asked, wary of any tricks he might be up to. Oh, yes, they called me the Playful One, but Guru could get you really well, if you weren't paying attention.

"Well, a few new friends of mine up here have had you as a guardian angel, and would probably enjoy speaking with you. Would you like to see them?" He showed no signs of malice or even deceit, so, what else could I do?

"Of course. Where is everyone?"

He raised a hand, and suddenly, I was barraged with about twenty former charges, all speaking at the same time. I sighed, knowing that I would be there for a long time, and I wouldn't think about Wufei until this was all over. Mohandas smiled, and slowly, we began a very long and, in the end, pleasant conversation.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I suppose I spent a number of weeks with my old charges, and for the first time in a few years, I was in good spirits and ready to see my 'friends' once again. It was with a sad heart that I bid my old charges adieu, but I needed to see how the others were. I left Mahatma last, whispering my thanks to him.

"It was my pleasure, Duo. May you find your happiness," he said, winking knowingly.

"And may you never run out of companions to preach to." I snorted, and his full and rich laughter soon joined mine.

"You will return, no?"

"Yes, sooner than last time."

"I would hope so. Over a thousand Earth years have passed since we last spoke," he replied, humour still in his voice, though I was starting to feel guilty.

"I am sorry, Mohandas. It was just... too much like the time with Solo. We were close, and then you were dead. It was..." I swallowed the tears I knew that were threatening to shed. An angel's tears were precious, and not to be wasted, and there had been so many tears among the angels lately. "It was hard for me."

A gentle hand was placed on my shoulder, and I looked up to be greeted by large, warm brown eyes. "It is alright, my friend. I understand. If it had not been myself going through the pain, I do not think I would have been around. So, do not worry yourself any longer about the past. It is gone, and will not be changed," he said softly.

His words were what I needed to hear after so many years, and I allowed one tear to leave a track down my face. "Thank you, oh, Guru of mine. Don't worry. I think that I have three more Heaven years to stay and play with you all. I'll be back." I waved and took off to go see my friends for the first time in over five months, Earth time.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I had no sooner made it to our 'usual' gathering place when I found myself bombarded by Giselle, Jean-Paul, Quatre, Hilde, and Cathy, not to mention that I received a shoulder clap from Zechs and a *huge* smile from Noin. I tried to untangle myself from the suffocating entourage I had acquired, and saw Heero glaring at me, with Trowa at his elbow.

"Hi!" I managed to squeak out between squeezing hugs. Giselle and Jean-Paul released me, finally, and saved me from Quatre, Cathy and Hilde as well.

"Hello, Duo," Sally said, although I still couldn't see her. Heero's glare was making me uncomfortable, and Giselle noticed me stiffen.

She whirled around to stare at her long-time perceived 'enemy'. "Grigori!" she snapped, and both Trowa and Heero looked at her. "Stop glaring at him. He just got back, from God only knows where. You will *not* be hostile to him. Go away!"

I pulled her back behind me. "It's ok, Giselle. Relax," I whispered loudly. "They aren't hurting anything. So, why the huge party?"

"You've been gone for nearly six weeks, Duo! The last one of us to see you was Hilde, and she said it wasn't for very long. We were worried," Cathy said in one breath.

I flushed at the tone of reproach in her usually mild tone. "I was... otherwise detained."

"Read, he was playing with his new friends," Jean-Paul remarked, sounding as if he were put out by that fact.

"Oh, no, not Duo. *I* heard that he was playing with Gandhi," Quatre retorted. "And having fun, no doubt."

"Um, so how are you holding down the fort, Quatre?" I asked, knowing full well that he was probably doing an excellent job, but I always asked when I was gone for a while.

"Oh, things are going well. The twins are progressing well, and Relena is turning out to be a little hellion. Isn't the right, Zechs?" the blond asked the taller angel in the back of the impromptu circle.

Zechs responded by shaking his head wearily. "From your lips... She really is a handful, but we all knew this ages ago. So, what did you do while you were away?" He winked suggestively, and before I could react, Noin had an elbow in his stomach.

"That is not something you should ask, Zechs! Duo will tell us when he's ready," she warned her soul-companion. He responded with a bashful look and a slight shrug to his broad shoulders.

"You know, for a bunch of *angels* and *muses* with *charges*, you all are sure behaving as if you had nothing better to do," a cold voice said, making our friendly atmosphere die.

We turned, and were 'greeted' by Dorothy, her blonde hair and eyebrows seeming eerie. The girl may be an angel, but that still doesn't make her pleasant.

"I thought you had a charge as well, Dorothy," Quatre said, pronouncing her name as if it left a bad taste in his mouth. It probably did, knowing how they reacted to one another.

"Oh, I do," she said smugly, flipping her long hair behind a shoulder. "But, as he is only twelve, I still have a whole year to visit my favorite group of suck ups."

"Our charges are asleep," Cathy said, shaking me from my thoughts of what I would like to do with her hair... Like, wrapping it around her throat.

"You know, bad things can happen to babies while they sleep, Catherine," she replied icily. Her words made me feel cold, as there was some truth to them, and *my* Wufei was still rather fragile at that point.

"Perhaps..." Zechs started, but was stopped by a calming embrace from Noin.

"Relax," she said. "She's just trying to rile you up." She turned on the intruder, her eyes promising murder, if angel can really look menacing. "Dorothy, I don't remember anyone asking you to come."

"Oh, but Noin, dear, I was just 'visiting' everyone. Your precious group was just the last stop on my list," the blonde hissed the last word.

"I'm not staying to listen to this... thing, any longer. I'm going to check on Wufei," Quatre snarled, disappearing from sight. I looked around to see Trowa head over to his forgotten book to start writing in it.

"I think I will check on Meiran now," Cathy said, hugging me a final time. "I'll talk to you later." She placed a chaste kiss on my cheek, waved to a still hidden Sally, and was gone as well.

"I think I will be gone now. I can't stand poor company," Zechs said icily, embracing Noin, and leaving.

Heero turned on his heel, obviously leaving Hilde, Jean-Paul, Noin, Giselle, and myself to deal with our 'company'. Dorothy sneered at the blatant discomfort in those of us who were left. Her smile *really* made me want to use her hair in a very un-angelic way.

"Aw, I didn't know you all were so sensitive," she mock pouted, her eyes following Heero as he walked away. "Party poopers. I mean, really, you would think you would enjoy some intelligent company."

"Yes, and we were until you showed up," I stated flatly, refusing to allow personal feelings come into this spat with her.

"Ah, so the Playful One speaks finally. So, *Duo*, how are things in this neck of the woods without Solo?" she hissed

I closed my eyes, so as not to hit her. That would have been bad, even with her baiting me. If I digressed to violence with her, I would be reassigned in a heartbeat, wish or no wish.

"You know, Dorothy," Giselle spat out her name like Quatre did, "I've been wondering how someone as bitter and horrible as you managed to stay here after the fall."

"Yes, she would make a perfect demon," Hilde mused. I couldn't hold back the image of Dorothy with a tail. She didn't need horns; she already had those hideous eyebrows.

"Ah, one of the 'twins', and little Hilde. Finally find a spine, Hill? I mean, after Olga fell, you had nothing to say, did you?"

Hilde's eyes narrowed dangerously, and I grabbed her arm. "Don't."

"Yes, silly girl, better listen to the Playful One. It seems he does have a brain."

I grabbed a hold of Noin's right arm, to prevent her from moving more than the step she had already taken in the... creature's direction. "Noin, don't. She's not worth it," I whispered.

"Why don't you leave, Dorothy? You aren't welcome here," Jean-Paul said. "I'm sure Treize is in need of a vile sewer rat such as yourself right about now."

I watched as the blonde angel stiffened. "How do you know his name?"

"Oh, well, he is on our list of young charges to inspire," Giselle stated matter-of-factly. "But, shouldn't you already know *all* about that?"

"You stay away from Treize," Dorothy hissed, storming away from us.

"Well, that was pleasant," Hilde said sarcastically. "Really, you would think that she and Une would realize that we don't like them, and don't have anything in common with them."

I felt the anger in me roll off in waves, and allowed my body to collapse onto the cloud-ground. Slowly, the others joined me in a sort of circle, looking as if they were reining in their anger as well.

"So, Deux, what *did* you do while you were away?" Giselle asked, the humorous twinkle back in her eye just that quickly.

TBC...