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Crashing Down	By : kracken Category: Gundam Wing/AC > Yaoi - Male/Male > Heero/Duo Views: 2893 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing and I don't make any money from this fanfiction.

Chapter List
- 1-1
- 2-2
- 3-3
- 4-4
- 5-5
- 4
- 5
"It's not like we ever see you do anything," was barely out of Sanchez's mouth before Duo deflected his arms aside and then flipped him over onto his back on the ground like a landed fish.

The man blinked up at Duo stupidly, trying to suck air with a diaphragm that was struggling. Duo looked like a child next to him, a smiling, hands on hips, devil imp of a child.

"I don't waste my energy, that's all," Duo told him with a chuckle. He reached down a hand to help the man up. After a second, the man took it, but he scrambled, knowing that Duo really couldn't pull his weight up off the ground.

Tumik looked over the rim of his glasses and made a disgusted sound. "I could have told you that would happen. Size isn't everything when you know how to use a man's weight against him."

"You were listening, good," Duo said, pleased. He had said those very words a few days ago to Polente, knowing that she needed the confidence when facing her larger opponents.

Duo looked over the ragtag group. Standing at attention, or looking even remotely like a military force, was probably never going to happen, and Heero and Duo were both in agreement that they weren't necessary. Working together was far more important and that was a goal still not realized. Duo's short speech on the importance of being a team had been countered with the question of why he wasn't physically part of the team. Heero, at least had been expecting it. Duo would have to have been a fool not to have expected it as well. A throw down wasn't going to remedy the situation either.

Duo pulled out a tazer from his pocket. He showed it to everyone. "This is the lesson for today; accomplishing a mission even when experiencing debilitating physical stress."

Jaws dropped. The usual curses and arguments rolled over Heero and Duo. It was time, though, to see if these desk jockeys had what it took to be real agents. If they couldn't finish a mission when facing pain and possible loss, then they didn't have any business being in the field.

Heero dropped a pack. "Mission; get that to the top of platform c, working as a team. Don't lose any team member."

Polente was white as she looked at Duo's tazer with wide eyes. "W-Where does the tazer come in?"

"I can't tell you everything," Duo replied and looked sympathetic. "I can only tell you that Heero and I accomplished this mission in record time. There's file footage, if you doubt that."

"What if we say, Fuck you, and go have coffee?" Porter demanded. His red dreads were tied back and his big shoulders and arms were flexing, as if he wanted to tear Duo apart with them.

"Then, after your coffee, you can sign your wash out papers and go find a job as tech assistance for a toaster company," Duo warned.

"I'm a top mechanic," Porter retorted. "The best. Une won't wash me out."

"You're a garage grease monkey," Heero growled back. "A dime a dozen and worthless if you never get into the field where your expertise is really needed."

Polente licked dry lips and looked across the mist covered field towards the platform sticking out of that mist. It was a long distance to cover. She picked up the pack, testing it's weight. "I can make that... with some help, guys. I don't want to wash out. This is my life."

Tumik surprised everyone by joining her. He grinned and said, "I may be a genius, but I'm not good with toasters. I'm with you."

Rajmally grunted and joined them, saying, "It'll be shit, I'm sure, but they won't let us die, right?"

"I wouldn't count on that," Carmichael warned as he joined the group. "I don't think Yuy follows orders that well."

Duo laughed at Heero's annoyed expression as the team reluctantly assembled.

Heero ignored him and checked his watch. "Go!" he said suddenly. They blinked stupidly at him. "Go! Go!" he ordered more loudly.

They began running in a ragged group into the mist.

"At least they went," Duo said, grinning at Heero's sour expression.

"That is more than expected," Heero agreed.

"You were hoping for a complete wash out weren't you?" Duo asked.

"It would have put an end to all of this," Heero said without denying it.

Duo cocked his head to one side. "Admit it, you're actually enjoying torturing them."

Heero kneaded his sore knuckles. The mist and the morning chill was making every joint throb. "It does relieve... stress... and... irritation."

"Thought so," Duo snickered. He looked out at the mist as someone yelled. "Molding new agents is fun. I get to be top dog without all of the putting my life on the line crap."

"That's important to you?" Heero wondered.

Duo sighed. "You never let it rest, do you?"

"If someone else knew your need for constant validation, they might have used that during torture," Heero pointed out.

"I don't need constant validation," Duo argued. "I've been humiliated plenty of times. My entire childhood was full of humiliation. Someone isn't going to break me because they tell me I'm not good enough. I just like being the best and training other people to be their best makes my day."

Duo was staring at the tazer, eyes thoughtful, almost puzzled.

"I like using my abilities," Heero admitted. "I don't like the thought of being useless."

"Always need orders or life is meaningless?" Duo wondered. He gestured to Heero with the tazer and said, as if he weren't changing the subject, "This makes every nerve twitch. I don't like it being near me."

He handed the tazer to Heero and Heero felt his hand shaking. He wouldn't have known that anything was wrong if Duo hadn't told him. The man was in control of himself.

Interesting, a part of Heero thought, but it was a small part. The anger was more prominent, the suspicion that someone had used a tazer on Duo liberally enough to leave that kind of physical trigger.

"It didn't bring up any memories," Duo told him as if emotions weren't attached to that statement at all. His voice was flat, matter of fact. He had withstood a bad reaction to holding a tazer to make certain that memories weren't triggered by it.

Another shout of surprise and pain from the mist. Duo grimaced and turned a little away from Heero.

"You need to overcome this reaction," Heero told him, his voice just as measured and flat. It was a truth that they both knew. They were forcing their trainees through a course to teach them the very thing that Duo now couldn't face.

"I think they need some help," Duo suddenly said. He tried to sprint into the mist, but his muscles, his bad ankle, and his grafts were obviously protesting. Heero knew he wouldn't let that stop him. He also knew that Duo wouldn't stop no matter what argument he made. He had to prove to himself that this new liability wouldn't keep him from completing a mission.

Heero held the tazer tightly, head bowed, and listened to the voices in the fog. He heard surprise as Duo joined the trainees. Heero could gage the distance and calculate the time that had passed. The trainees had stopped somewhere halfway and had been unable to go forward.

"Leave them!" Duo's shout came back to Heero.

"But we'll fail the test!" Polente protested.

That was the test, Heero knew as he heard someone... Tumik... agree with Duo. Sometimes agents had to be left behind to complete a mission. Team work sometimes meant that a team mate sacrificed for the others.

"Shit! Climb, Captain. Get your ass up here!" Polente, high voice carrying a long way.

"He's mine!" Duo shouted back. "Keep going!"

Heero knew there were men in the mist with tazers. Duo wasn't running from them. Duo was going to sacrifice for the team.

A lone figure with the pack made the top of the platform, cheered raggedly, and waved it up high. That figure was joined by a few others. Somehow Heero knew that Duo wouldn't be joining them.

"Fuck!" Heero cursed his joints and ran into the mist towards the platform. He passed fallen men just coming to from being tazed, their 'enemies' looking after them.

Climbing up the platform he found Duo hanging from the struts, long braid twisting lazily as a man held onto him looking concerned. Heero grabbed the man and shook at him. "Why the fuck did you taz him up here?"

"I didn't!" the man shouted back. "We started on the ground, I tazed him, and he kept climbing. What the shit, right? He was reacting though and clocked himself on a beam."

"Call for a medic!" Heero demanded as he tried to make Duo's position more secure.

Duo was still shaking. Heero heard him muttering brokenly, "Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!" Blood was dripping down from his forehead.

"It's over," Heero told him firmly, almost putting lips to Duo's ear. "I have you. I have you safe."

"H-Heero?" Duo whispered, incredulous and then went limp as if he knew that he didn't have to fight any longer.

---------------------------------------

It wasn't technically his ship, but Heero had flown it for two years and he knew every quirk, every nut and bolt, and every sound it made. Now that it was, again, technically, not assigned to him any longer, he was rather pleased that no one had dared yet to step foot in it. He supposed its name, Death Trap, was daunting enough, but the bare bones, hyped up thruster, collection of struts and gyros, that he had turned it into had been beyond anyone's ability to pilot. If he never stepped into it again, he could imagine it mothballed, or taken apart for scrap parts.

Heero spent several hours fine tuning the engines. He wasn't expecting a new assignment, but the morning that he had spent with the trainees, had taught him that Duo's absence there, was enough to sour him on the entire project. He didn't share Duo's enthusiasm and his trainees had seemed afraid, or at the very least, nervous about not having Duo around to keep Heero from going to excess in their drills.

Heero shook out a cramp in his fingers and felt a wave of anger as those same fingers refused to tighten down a panel. He let the tool drop, clattering on the metal deck, and glared at the panel. Sitting on the deck, tools around him, and a rag tied around his head to keep the sweat out of his eyes, he hadn't wanted to have something as simple as a screwdriver show him that active duty was going to be a fond memory soon, if it wasn't already. The clock was ticking down on his career and Duo had known it.

Of course Duo had seen it coming because he was sharing the same reality. In a hospital bed, having suffered a concussion, the doctors had been able to examine him thoroughly. During his debriefing on the incident, Une had admitted that such a medical examination had been zealously avoided by Duo after his first release from the hospital after his trauma. What they had discovered had taken Duo off field duty assignments permanently. More operations were in Duo's future, but doctors concluded that Duo's torn and stressed ligaments, even with further intervention, would never be able to take the stresses of field work.

Heero could see how having one of her best agents sidelined had not sat well with Une. The measuring look in her eye when she had gazed over her glasses at Heero, had apprised him of the fact that she was aware of his looming retirement from active duty as well. She couldn't miss his constant kneading of finger joints and the hitch in his walk that betrayed knees that weren't absolutely stable under him.

Fuck her anyway! Heero thought harshly. Even if he wasn't able to measure up physically, mentally he could still dance rings around any other agent. Duo had been right to look at other options. Heero was certain that the man had already known that his body was never going to heal enough for active duty. He had found his out, training agents, and Heero found himself seriously considering it as his option as well. He didn't intend to be put down like an old war dog who had passed his usefulness.

Heero ran a hand over the bulkhead of his ship and still felt bitter at his own body's betrayal. He had loved flying by the seat of his pants and jumping into a conflict to save the day. He flexed fingers that had been having trouble controlling the ship. The deviation that had caused the ship damage, had not been 'regular operating hazard', he admitted to himself, at last. He should have been able to avoid it. Une had known it after reading the report, he realized, and his mechanic, shooting him furtive, surprised looks when Heero had shown him the damage, had known as well.

'When you visit Maxwell,' Une had said,'Convince him to stay in bed. I want him under observation.'

'Why would I visit him?' Heero had snapped back and she had looked surprised and then measuring.

He was getting updates from the doctor on his mobile devices, Heero thought, so that he would know when Duo was ready to return to duty. Going into the medical building, a place that he hated, would be both non productive and embarrassing for Duo. The man wouldn't want Heero to see him less than optimal.

His absence was noticeable, though, and Heero wasn't certain how he felt about that development. His new home seemed far too large and empty without Duo filling up the place with his outgoing personality. Heero remembered, at uncomfortable times, Duo's hands kneading his knees and his casual offer of sex. Though he had yet to take Duo up on that offer, he couldn't deny that the possibility was poised between them.

Personal commitments could be messy things. Heero had zealously avoided them after his fiasco with Relena Peacecraft. She had mistaken his duty and his passion for the cause for deeper emotional attachments. She had wanted marriage, children, and a life in Sanq Kingdom. She had wanted to give him a peaceful end to his violent life. His scowl at her detailed plans, breathlessly told to him as he had lain in a hospital bed, after the Maramena incident, and his grunt of disgust had not been what she had expected. Duo's chuckle and his criticism for not 'letting her down easy' had been just as annoying at the time.

Heero frowned, remembering Duo always close to hand until he was released from the hospital. He had been a solid presence taken for granted. There hadn't been any expectations, not any requirement for Heero to put on a good face and appreciate the attention. Duo had guarded him, had made himself his go between when his disgust with doctors and nurses had almost reached violent levels, and had gone away when the release papers were signed. Heero hadn't thanked him and Duo hadn't seemed to need any such acknowledgment.

Heero felt the tug of duty. Concern for Duo wouldn't make him go where he wasn't comfortable, but duty was more powerful. He owed Duo and Heero hated owing anyone anything. He needed to visit Duo and put his ledger back in the black.

"Fuck!" Heero exploded and used the wall to support him while he gained his feet, his knees protesting all the way. He took a few limping steps to the hatch and then put a hand on the ship bulkhead once more. It felt like goodbye. Deep down, he knew that it was.

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In medical, Duo's doctor gave Heero a bland look from over his computer pad. "You didn't really expect him to stay here? He checked himself out an hour ago. He flipped me off, too, when I questioned his sanity. I reported it to Une. Not that she'll write a report. Gundam pilots are sacrosanct, after all. You men can do what you want, right? Even if it means dying- "

Heero's hand shot out like a striking snake and the doctor made a startled sound as he locked onto the man's lab coat and hauled him close. "Dying?"

The man jerked the cloth out of Heero's grasp and it was easier than Heero liked.

The doctor glared as he straightened his coat. "Dying," he clarified, "as in stumbling around headquarters and taking the chance that he will pass out and injure himself so badly that he dies."

Heero took hold of the man's computer pad, flicked to Duo's chart, and quickly read his condition. Giving the incensed man back the pad, he grunted and turned on his heel. As he made his way out of the medical wing of Preventers, he was calmer. Duo's condition wasn't critical and Heero believed that he could operate even with disorientation resulting from his concussion. The few medication notes were problematic, though. Labels of 'classified' were far too numerous.Heero wondered if that had tripped Duo's sudden exodus. He wouldn't stay if he knew that he was being given mysterious drugs.

"Yuy?"

Heero turned, irritably. Wu Fei was not someone he wanted to see just then. The man was in full Preventer uniform, hair slicked back tightly and superior expression firmly in place. They called him Une's dog;always at her heel and carrying out her orders. There was a stiffness to his stance that told Heero that he was following orders, now. Not that he had ever had a social visit from the man. They called Heero the most antisocial Gundam Pilot, but Heero knew that Chang held that title. A man could be among throngs of people all day long, but still hold himself aloof by belief of superiority. Heero's sense of self worth, didn't even scratch the surface of the sense of superiority that Chang possessed.

"Make an appointment. I'm off duty," Heero growled and started to turn away.

Wu Fei didn't make the mistake of physically holding him back. He let cold words and attitude do that for him."Logs show that you were working on a ship against orders."

Heero glared back at the man. He couldn't help saying, "My ship."

Wu Fei didn't waste time in compassionate wording. "Not any longer. It's been decommissioned. You will not be issued a new ship. Your pilot's license, and access to the air strip as a pilot, has been revoked indefinitely."

Heero didn't have to ask why. Questions about his last mission had been raised and appropriate action had been taken. Heero couldn't help angrily flexing hands that had failed him as a pilot, even though he knew that the decision had been a correct one.

Wu Fei seemed braced for violence. Heero realized why he had been chosen to deliver the bad news. Aside from Duo, who, Heero suspected, would have turned down an order to tell Heero that his days of piloting were over, only Wu Fei stood a chance of defending against any violence that Heero might perpetrate in anger at the news.

Heero did feel like punching something. He had just been told that the best part of his life; piloting, flying through air and space, the ultimate freedom, was now denied him for the rest of his life because of joints ruined in the service of humanity.

"Fuck!" Heero let the one word out with a harsh breath as he blindly walked away from Chang.

The man didn't stop him this time. Heero could see him in his mind's eye, smartly turning and going back to Une, like a tin soldier, to give her his report. "Yuy received the news without violence,' he would probably tell her and then file his report electronically and forward it to all concerned. Heero wondered if Duo would get a notification. They were on assignment together.

Heero felt like a stiff drink and solitude to nurse his new wound. He knew where to find both. Something told him that Duo would have come to that conclusion as well.

Home. When Heero tossed his keys onto the table by the front door, he wasn't surprised to hear the vid down the hall in the grand living room. Mindless sports facts, the cheers of a crowd, and a play by play of a polo match did surprise him. Polo? Duo and polo were as mismatched as a cat and a salad.

Where had he heard that expression? Duo, Heero realized as he kicked off shoes and headed silently down the hall.

"Get a glass!" Duo's voice called to him. "We'll drink together."

Heero snagged a whiskey glass from a stand alone bar as he entered the living room. It was comfortingly large in his hand as he rounded the couch and found Duo sprawled on it, his own glass in hand and a bottle of something in the other. He motioned at Heero with the bottle.

"I was expecting you to refuse," Duo said with a chuckle as he made room for Heero on the couch and he sat. Duo poured a brown liquid into Heero's glass and his hand wasn't steady. "Always took you for a... a..." He motioned with the bottle again and gave up as he settled back into plush cushions. He was still wearing a hospital gown with a pair of baby blue boxers.

"I drink when it's appropriate," Heero replied as he thought about Duo's lack of clothing and concluded that they had tried to keep him at the medical center by refusing to give him his clothes.

"This is appropriate, I guess," Duo said with a heavy nod. "You were shitcanned from being a pilot and I... well, I'm just some fucked up experiment."

"Classified medication," Heero said and then took a small sip of his drink. Whiskey. It burned as he took a larger drink.

"Of course I hacked and found out what they were giving me," Duo reported smugly, but then looked pissed again. "They were messing with my memory. They really don't want me to remember something." He took another large swallow of his drink. "Nobody likes to wake up and find out that someone burned holes in his brain with chemicals. They won't get a chance to shoot me up again. I'll leave Preventers, first."

Leave Preventers? The thought chilled Heero. After the war he had been at loose ends. Preventers had grounded him and given him purpose.

"Don't look like that, Heero," Duo said softly and patted Heero's knee cap gently. "I know what Preventers does for you. Maybe you won't pilot, but you'll find something else to do for them. I'm good where ever I am, though. I'm used to landing on my feet running."

Heero could see Duo fitting in where ever he went. Heero couldn't see himself doing anything that didn't require a gun and went hand in hand with violence. Preventers was the only organization on the right side of the law that could provide that.

Duo was suddenly moving. Heero braced himself in time to take Duo's body on top of his own. Bottle still in one hand and drink in the other, they sank back until Heero was lying prone and Duo was looking blearily into his face. One eye was slightly dilated. His face was flushed, several scars standing out sharply in white relief. Heero reached and put his glass on the floor.

"Let's fuck," Duo slurred, alcohol breath attesting that he had started drinking long before Heero had arrived.

Duo started to kiss Heero. Heero put a hand on the man's forehead and stopped him. Duo put his weight on that hand but didn't push. "Not while you're drunk," Heero growled. He didn't ask Duo to get off, though. His weight felt good, almost comforting against his body.

"Drunk sex is the best. No regrets if you can't remember what you did," Duo chuckled.

The bottle dropped from his hand. Heero caught it deftly and set it down on the floor. The glass was next, sloshing a bit as he worked it out of Duo's hand and put it down next to the bottle. Still Holding Duo away from his face with his other hand, they finally stilled and stared at each other.

"Why not?" Duo asked. "Don't you want to flip me over, yank down my shorts, and slam that...you know?... Get in there and make me feel it?"

"What?" Heero frowned at him.

Duo sighed, giving Heero a strong dose of alcohol. "You are asexual, aren't you?"

Heero moved his hand and Duo, instead of attempting to finish his kiss, lowered his head to the crook of Heero's neck. Stray hairs tickled Heero's nose. He rubbed them away.

"I'm not sexy, am I?" Duo sounded depressed.

"If you're going to cry, I'll dump you and go to the other room," Heero warned.

"You don't want me," Duo continued, but sounded sleepy, now.

"Don't be stupid."

"I'm not stupid... wait... are you saying I'm wrong?"

"Stupid."

Duo laughed and then relaxed completely. He was asleep soon after.

Heero snagged a pillow and tucked it under his own head to make himself more comfortable. He thought about not being a pilot any longer. He thought about what he might do now. He thought about Duo leaving and becoming something other than a Preventer agent. The polo match droned on like white noise. Heero realized that he didn't want Duo to go. He didn't want to stop seeing his ridiculous evil imp grin and feeling the sting of his acute personal observations. Preventers might ground him, but Heero considered that Duo might ground him as well.

Heero felt an urge to roll Duo and have his way. It felt like basest instinct. He could feel the hot, hard rise in his pants, trapped underneath Duo. Heero could imagine shoving into Duo, and wanted it acutely.

Someone in the polo match scored and the crowd went wild. Heero turned his head and found himself wondering, again, why Duo had chosen it. They were in Milliardo Peacecraft's home. The man loved Polo, as Heero recalled. The man was paying for their upkeep, paying the servants to clean up after them.

Heero felt his desire cool, drenched in the ice water of reality. Maybe Duo had lied and there had been something between him and the ex Prince of Sanq? His eyes focused on the players. Rich sons of rich fathers and rich nations. He and Duo were like scavengers on the fringes of their leavings, Heero felt. They were feasting, but only through Peacecraft's good graces. If he withdrew it, they would both end up in Preventer barracks, with nothing but what they could carry in a duffel.

Heero didn't like to owe anyone. They needed to move, he felt, already deciding that Duo would go with him. After they were secure in their own home, he felt, then maybe he could explore his need for Duo and perhaps find out why that need was so strong.

Heero hooked an arm and leg around Duo to keep him from sliding off and then pried his handheld computer from his pocket. As Duo slept, he searched for appropriate homes.

-----------------------------------------

A week later found them in a home that was up for sale.

"It's high elevation,has a hot tub, a wet bar, a fireplace, wooden floors, oversized bathroom, and its impossible to see from the road."

Duo had his arms crossed as he glared around the living room. "Its on the side of a mountain. When it snows we'll never get a car up that goat track you call a private driveway. Its a lot smaller than Milliardo's place. The hot tub is small, too, and we have to clean it. There won't be anyone cleaning up after us and maintaining the place."

Heero nodded and headed for the front door. Duo stopped him with a sigh.

"Where are you going?" Duo asked in exasperation.

"I have five more homes that fit your criteria," Heero informed him.

"I want this one."

Heero turned and frowned. "This is acceptable?"

"It is already furnished," Duo replied as he flopped down on a leather chair by the stone fireplace. "The decor is better too. Nothing I can't understand. All simple and manly."

Heero looked around them briefly at the red leather furniture, the sheep wool rug, and the thick wooden dining room table. There were three bedrooms, a den, and an office as well, all with the same basic cabin decor feel to them.

"Do you like it?" Duo asked.

"It's a place. It is only necessary for you to live here for me to like it," Heero replied as he emailed the realtor and wired the money. His bank account took a large hit, but his needs were simple. A Preventer paycheck was far more than he needed each month.

Duo blinked at him and then grinned. "You are a romantic. Are you going to buy it?"

"I already have."

"Then how much rent money do I owe you?"

"None."

Duo's fingers tapped on the red leather of his chair arm and he looked annoyed. "Do you want sex, then?"

"Yes, but not for rent," Heero replied as he turned and headed for the front door.

"Why are you leaving, then?" Duo was out of his chair and following him, sounding confused.

"I'm getting our bags out of the car."

"Then we'll have sex?"

Heero paused with his hand on the doorknob as he considered the prospect. "No," he replied and left Duo imitating a fish.

Duo called after him, as Heero opened the trunk of their car in the rocky driveway, "Then when will this sex occur? Just so I'm ready when you are?"

Heero closed the trunk and carried the bags inside. Duo took his, using both hands and wincing as his still healing body protested. Heero passed him with his own bag and headed for his chosen bedroom. "I haven't decided on a time table," Heero finally replied.

Heero wasn't prepared for Duo's bag to slam into his back. He staggered and went down on one knee. Duo's sudden weight took him down the rest of the way and he lay flat on the wooden floor, his own bag sliding with the momentum across the floor towards the bedrooms. Duo lay full length on his back and said in his ear, "We're going to stop playing games, Heero! I'm taking you right here and now."

Hero propped himself up on his elbows and looked sideways at Duo speculatively. "Against my will?"

"That's not fucking likely, is it?" Duo retorted. "I was hoping that I could make you WANT to have sex."

"We have night maneuvers with the trainees," Heero reminded him. "You need to be at optimum."

"If I'm topping, I will be," Duo promised with a grin.

Heero was silent, considering, and then relaxed his chin on his hands. "I agree."

Duo was silent as his smile slowly left his face and then he was rolling and lying on the floor beside Heero, his braid snaking along the polished wood as if framing them both. His purple eyes were very serious. "What do you want? Just tell me. I just want to know that I'm waiting for something that IS going to eventually happen."

Heero didn't know how to answer him. He wasn't used to that level of confusion. "I can't predict the future."

"Oh," Duo said, as if understanding everything. "You want to know if this is the right move, if this is the best of all possibilities."

"Life is short," Heero replied.

Duo didn't argue that point. They both were feeling like men twice their age. They couldn't know how many years the war had taken off of their lives. "I'm waiting for you to decide that I'm worth the time?"

"I'm not that cold," Heero replied.

"Sorry," Duo apologized and then lightly touched Heero's cheek as if afraid of sudden retaliation.

Heero leaned into that touch, closing his eyes and trying to analyze why that touch only meant something coming from Duo's fingers. "It's not all about sex."

Heero could feel Duo's fingers tense and then he slowly lowered his hand. "I know it's not. I just can't help pushing things along. I want it too badly."

Heero stood up with difficulty, feeling fresh bruises and a floor burned kneecap. Duo stayed on the floor, propped on one arm and looking up at him.

"I want to know if this is what's best for the both of us," Heero was finally able to clarify.

"When you decide, let me know," Duo told him.

Heero nodded, but then changed the subject as he retrieved his bag. "I'll be ready for maneuvers."

"I'll try to be ready," Duo laughed as he finally stood up.

He would go whether he was ready or not, Heero thought as he entered his room and began unpacking his bag. Clothes went neatly into a drawer, extra guns, bullets, and several knives were set out on top of the dresser. He checked the guns even though he knew they were in perfect working order. It was a habit he couldn't let go of from his long life of always being one step ahead of death. His favorite gun never left the holster at the small of his back.

A fleeting voice criticized him for allowing Duo to tackle him, for giving him the perfect opportunity to take that gun. Heero was confident that he could have stayed in control of the situation, but there was always the chance that something unforeseen could have given Duo an edge over him. A split second to pull his gun... but Heero was certain that Duo had his own. It was useless paranoia to worry about access to his when that was definitely the case.

Heero checked his knee and grimaced. It hadn't liked that fall. It was bruised, burned from the wooden floor, and swelling a bit around the knee. He hated how fragile his body had become, how easily it was to lose his hundred percent efficiency. He needed that knee. He was expected to run night drills with the trainees while Duo gave them orders via communications.

Heero swallowed a few of his anti-inflammatory drugs dry and then stretched out on his bunk to rest the knee until it was time to leave for the training grounds.

Duo made some noises in the kitchen, the clatter of a plate and silverware coming down the hallway. There wouldn't be much there, just the bare bones that the previous owner must have left behind. They would have to restock all the necessities. It was going to be odd shopping for domestic items with Duo. That was something that lovers did, Heero had heard.

Duo's questions had been valid ones. What did Heero want? Yes, validation that being together was best for both of them, but a strong emotion, that Heero was unfamiliar with, told him that incompatibility and career goals weren't going to enter in to any real decision about whether they should try a relationship.

Then why wait? Why not, finally, allow himself to take what Duo was so strongly offering him?

Duo appeared in Heero's doorway and leaned against the jam. "We need to shop for some things... food at the top of the list. Want to take a trip to the store after maneuvers, darling?"

Duo said 'darling' in a joking manner. Heero stared at him for a long moment and Duo finally frowned.

"What?"

How to ask? How to explain to Duo what he was feeling? How to let go of the man he had become, the man who wanted everything in a report that was clear, concise, and with clear cut results. He wanted. He felt strong emotions. He felt... out of control.

Duo sighed and moved to sit on the bed. He bent to the task of rubbing Heero's injured knee gingerly. His fingers avoided the burn and the bruise and concentrated on the wrenched muscle.

"You don't have to say it, you know?" Duo told him softly. "Actions speak louder than words."

"Is it really what you want?" Heero breathed, feeling pleasure so keen that it was hard to stop himself from groaning.

"It's what I've always wanted, since you stood in that cell doorway and rescued me during the war. I knew then that you had a heart. I wasn't sure until then."

Duo shrugged, but his fingers never paused in their kneading as he continued, "We've both been a mess, though. We had to put distance between ourselves and our former lives. It wouldn't have worked any sooner than this."

"Why not?"

"Because we didn't need each other before now," Duo explained. "It's time to slow down, time to step aside for younger soldiers, and time to see how the other half lives, the half that can love and live with someone besides a buster rifle."

"And if Une wasn't lying about the possibility that you could be a sleeper agent?" Heero asked.

Duo's hands paused and then he chuckled as he continued, "I know my own mind. They can't erase everything with chemicals."

Heero had trouble understanding and then he thought that he did. "You could remember, if you wanted to?"

"Yes," Duo replied, but he was looking pinched with stress at the thought. "It's hard to want that, though, when everyone tells me that I might not stay sane if I remember. So, I'm left with a blank when I could discover, for certain if they planted any subliminal programming. Une thinks it's worth the risk.... well, as long as I have you as my watch dog."

Heero checked his watch. They had time. He reached out and took Duo's hand from his knee. Slowly, as Duo's eyes widened in surprise and then in anticipation, he pulled Duo down for a kiss.

Heero knew what a man did during sex. He kissed, practiced lengthy foreplay, and then either topped or bottomed if other forms of friction weren't enough. He could follow the numbers. He wasn't a virgin.

Duo straddled him, hissing at the pain of aching muscles and grafts. He wasn't following the numbers. He was pulling down his pants, reaching back to free Heero's hard erection, and then slowly forcing it inside of him with thrusts and rolls of his hips, all the while kissing Heero open mouthed.

Duo grimaced in pain, but Heero was drooling precum and Duo was using it to ease the way. His own erection was bobbing in reach. Thick, but not long, it was still a handful that had Heero feeling an odd ache as he took hold of it. He wanted it inside of him. He'd never experienced a desire to bottom before. He wasn't sure how to ask for that.

Seated fully and looking pleased with himself, Duo grinned down at Heero, braid snaking down and coiling on Heero's chest. "How's that?" he wondered.

Heero's cell rang. He frowned, every synapse of his brain centered on the tight sheath of Duo's ass.

Duo grabbed the cell out of Heero's pocket and answered it. "Maxwell."

Heero couldn't keep still. His hips slowly rose and pushed deeper into Duo. Duo grunted and looked down at Heero as his smile turned into a frown of concern.

"We're on it!" Duo replied to whomever he was speaking to and then let the phone drop on Heero's chest. It hit painfully.

Duo lifted himself off of Heero, making Heero's erection snap and bob. He hitched up his pants and fastened them as he explained, "Time for action, fly-boy! One of our trainees decided to cheat and check out the course ahead of time. He's in need of rescue."

"Fuck!" Heero swore as he rose with difficulty and struggled to get his pants back into place over an erection that was quickly going down.

"Remember our place," Duo told him irritably. "I'm going to finish what I started."

------------------------------------

Agents and trainees stared up at a vertical cliff face in the bright sunlight that bent outward at the top and looked impossible to scale. It wasn't real rock, but as close as one could be manufactured. Safety lines hung from the top, harness already snapped in place;ready for the day's training session. The agent who was now unconscious far above them hadn't used one. He was hanging in the barbed wire that barred the way the last few feet of the climb.

"You expected someone to actually scale that barrier?" one of the agents asked Duo and Heero as they approached. "A trainee agent?"

Duo reached into a pocket and took out a pair of wire cutters. He handed them to Heero and Heero pocketed them in his stretch climbing shorts. "That would be brainless."

"They been training on smaller climbs," Heero said on the heels of that. "They are all capable of a climb of this level."

The agent nodded up at the unconscious trainee. "Not all of them."

"With the proper equipment," Duo retorted as he and Heero pulled on climbing gloves. He motioned Heero to follow him. "Let's get this done."

"Once you cut away the wire, we'll drop a line from a hover ship to pull him out and transport him to medical," the agent informed them.

Duo made an impatient wave of dismissal. "Don't need one. There's enough lines."

"I don't understand-" The man stopped talking as he saw Duo stand at the bottom of the rock; bend a knee slightly, and cup hands above his head.

Heero ignored stiff, aches and pains, as he lightly stepped up Duo's body as if it were a ladder. His weight never rested on any point for more than a few seconds as he used Duo's knee, shoulder, and hands before he was grasping rock high above them. He tilted a foot out and Duo ran at the wall. His foot hit an invisible bump in the rock and he used that to push upward to grab Heero's foot. Swinging on it, he released one hand and reached as high as he could to find a handhold. Hanging by that, he secured his other hand to a dangling rope that stretched up to the barbed wire barrier.

"Got it!" he announced. "Your show, Heero."

Heero climbed as swiftly as he could manage, Hating when fingers cramped and twisted and he had to pause to shake them out. Almost to the top, that cramping became very problematic.

"Fucking fingers!" Heero snarled. "Work!"

It wasn't a matter of forcing them, because no amount of will would get them to untwist. they had to relax on their own before Heero could continue. Each pause took longer, but Heero eventually reached the safety lines and unhooked them one by one. Tying them together, he let the heavy weight drop.

Duo had attached himself to the safety rope and he swung and twirled as he caught the ropes. Heero wasn't certain what it was costing him, but Duo didn't fail to hold onto the ropes as Heero cut the barbed wire and pulled himself into the basket of sharp tines that held the trainee. Grabbing Duo's rope, he began hauling Duo and his ropes upward.

When Duo reached the top and Heero pulled him through, hair and shirt catching on the tines, the trainees below cheered.

"So,"Duo wondered, "How many of them do you think were standing around when genius here decided to try the cliff face on her own?"

Genius was Polente. Sprawled on her back, it was obvious that she had fallen from the top of the cliff while deploying the rope over the barbed wire to use to repel downward. she was covered in barbed wire gauges and scratches. Her eyes were open and watching Heero and Duo with an expression of pain and acute embarrassment.

"Hurt your back?" Duo wondered as he crouched by her and began tying ropes around her body in an intricate harness.

"Yes," she replied and then, "Sorry, sirs."

"You should be!" Heero began heatedly as he tied the lines to secure points on the wire barrier.

Duo cut him off. "You should be," he echoed, but with more humor. "You just made two old men climb up after you and you interrupted some hot sex."

She looked guilty now and even more embarrassed. "I'm very sorry, sirs." Then it occurred to her that Duo was not one hundred percent. "Your injuries, sir?"

"I know how not to stress anything," Duo replied, brushing off her concern. He tested the ropes. "Now, let's get you out of here."

"Airlift?" Polente asked.

Standard procedure. Heero frowned and shook his head. "Wind from the south kicking up dirt and creating lower level turbulence. Down thrust will also cause this basket of wire to swing and twist."

"You don't want to be a pincushion, do you, agent Polente?" Duo asked with a comforting grin.

"No sir," she replied and then her eyes tracked to the top of the cliff. She smiled suddenly.

"You made it, agent," Duo said with sure knowledge. "That was well done."

Heero grunted as he rolled barbed wire and secured it by twisting more wire into it. "She was supposed to work with her fellow agents in a team action. Attempting the climb alone was a failure of the exercise."

"You do realize that, right Agent Polente?" Duo asked in concern.

"Yes, sir," she replied.

"Then I can praise her for the effort," Duo said to Heero. "Maybe it was wrong, but she made it and that's saying a hell of a lot for her ability."

Heero picked her up and she sobbed with pain. "If this were a real situation, she would stay there until she died."

Duo untwisted lines and shrugged. "She might have recovered enough on her own to repel down. Adrenaline can do a lot, right Heero? Isn't that how you made it up here?"

"Fuck you!" Heero ground out.

"I was hoping you would, but later," Duo chuckled. He leaned his weight against the lines to keep them untangled and nodded at Heero. "Ready."

"Roger that," Heero replied and then slowly let Polente's body down over the wire. He joined Duo on the lines then and they slowly lowered Polente to the ground. A shout let them know when she was in safe hands.

The ropes went slack as Polente was taken off of them.

"Race you?" Duo asked, his grin almost manic.

Heero wanted to curse him and call him a childish idiot, but he never could turn down a challenge. He nodded, once, and then they were both throwing themselves over the side of the wire while hands tangled in the dangling lines. They swung wildly, stabilized, and then began repelling downward swiftly.

Duo made it down first and everyone on the ground gave an amazed cheer, even the medics who were stabilizing Polente for a trip to medical.

"As my prize for getting down first, I get to set the punishment," Duo told them over their cheers. They all fell silent. "For ignoring a dangerous situation , six laps through obstacle course Alpha seven." When they stared, he barked, "Now!"

Bodies began pushing through the crowd and the trainees sprinted for the field.

Heero saw Duo look up at him and he wasn't smiling now as Heero finally touched his feet to the Earth. "We're going to medical, too," Duo told him. "They must be able to do something about those joints of yours."

Heero tried not to shove Duo away from everyone as he took them to find privacy further up field. He said, then, tensely, "I did everything they suggested. They can lessen the pain, but the damage is done. They can't turn back the clock, Maxwell."

Duo glared. "You almost fucked me, Heero. I think we're beyond Maxwell."

Heero swallowed and nodded. "Duo... "

Duo sighed and raked fingers through his hair. "Look, not here. Let's save it for when we're back at the house. We have trainees to discipline."

Duo turned and stumbled. He caught his balance and then began walking towards obstacle course Alpha Seven. The climb hadn't been easy on either of them, but stubbornness had made them both attempt it. Like Polente's unauthorized climb, Heero thought, they had done something very foolish. Heero wasn't certain that he could learn from that mistake, though. He wasn't certain that he could stop pushing his body past its new limitations. He wasn't certain that Duo could either.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Heero was unclear about his current situation. The day was over and dinner was eaten and cleaned up. He was sitting on the couch with Duo and watching a vid show. Heero wasn't certain what it was about and he didn't care to expend energy finding out. He had taken his medication but his joints were still aching, especially his knees. They hadn't liked being pushed that hard. Duo was a presence, but not a communicative one. there was a cushion between them and that cushion seemed like a wall.

What was permitted? What did Heero want? What did Duo want? How deep was their new relationship? Duo had promised to finish sex, but he wasn't suggesting it now and Heero wasn't sure what to say to initiate it.

"I heard from Milliardo," Duo said suddenly. He didn't look at Heero. There was a slight frown on his face.

Heero tried to recall when they had been apart that day. Duo had gone for energy drinks. "On your cell?" Heero asked.

Duo nodded. He didn't offer more than that.

Heero was thinking about how tight and warm Duo had been inside. There had to be words that he could say... a gesture... that would get them off of the couch and into the bedroom.

"Not the jealous type?" Duo wanted to know at last.

Heero had missed a prompt He sighed in frustration. "I don't want him fucking you."

Duo did look at him then and snorted laughter. "That's... blunt."

Duo liked that.

"I want to fuck you," Heero announced.

"Here?" Duo wondered, still looking amused.

Heero thought about his aching knees and decided, "No, in the bedroom. This is too uncomfortable."

"Not if I'm on top," Duo suggested.

"Bedroom," Heero insisted.

They went to the bedroom then, shedding their clothes casually as they went. Heero's erection was already full and bobbing as he walked. Duo's wasn't. He didn't seem hesitant or uninterested. He climbed onto the bed and sprawled on his back, giving Heero an encouraging smile.

He should get condoms... lubrication... Heero paused, considering it, but Duo lifted his knees and spread his legs invitingly.

"You have enough lube dripping out of their, Darling." Duo nodded to Heero's oozing erection. "I like it a little rough, too."

Heero wasn't sure what happened next. He was on Duo, shoving the man's knees up and pushing into him. He thrust hard repeatedly with enough force to make their bodies slap against each other as he lay on top of Duo. Duo was so warm and deep, so hard under him, yet soft in places as well. Heero was rocked by an orgasm and he made sure he planted it deep in Duo. It hadn't taken long, but it had been very satisfying.

"Owe," Duo said, but he didn't sound in real pain or upset. "How long have been saving that one up?"

"Years," Heero panted back.

"Payback is hell," Duo said and he rolled and pulled Heero along with him.

Duo was hard, now, and he was just as unmerciful as he brought Heero up on hands and knees and shoved a precum slicked cock into him. Pain spiked along Heero's spine and he grunted as he lowered his face into the pillow. Duo rode him. He loosened, became slicker, and Heero felt primal excitement and a pleasure that was unexpected.

Duo shot his load and pulled out just as quickly. He collapsed onto his back beside Heero, breathing hard. Heero turned on his side and watched Duo's expression.

"What the hell was that?" Duo asked softly.

It was a concerned question. He was sorry about the sex. Heero felt the aching slickness of his own ass and decided it was going to impact his effectiveness the next day. He knew Duo wasn't talking about that, though.

"I don't know," Heero replied honestly.

"Are we angry?" Duo wanted to know. "Did we want to fuck each other hard because... because we want to punish each other?"

"Are you angry with me?" Heero asked simply.

Duo was thoughtful. "No," he replied at last. "You?"

"No," Heero replied.

"Maybe we shouldn't think about it? Maybe... we just needed to get it out of our system....Like..." Duo gave up.

"You talk too much," Heero replied.

Duo leaned over and kissed Heero. "Sorry."

Heero felt tired, and ready to sleep for awhile, but something else needed to be said. "We don't take things easy."

Was that a good explanation? Maybe there weren't words? Maybe they couldn't be other than quick, hard, and intense? Was it a bad thing? Heero didn't feel any regret, just a sore ass.

"I'm fine," Heero told Duo, and saw by Duo's relief that he had said the right thing.

"So am I," Duo assured him and grinned. "Not saying I want that all the time, but it was... hot."

They were quiet then, both of them satisfied that they hadn't made a mistake.

"I don't want Milliardo fucking you," Heero suddenly repeated, that last detail unwilling to let him rest. He needed Duo to know how strongly he felt about that.

"It wasn't about fucking," Duo growled. He turned, pushed himself up against Heero, and curled up around his pillow. Heero enjoyed the feel of Duo against his chest. "He wanted me to try and find more triggers. He thinks that might tell them something about how messed up I am."

"Then he isn't in the loop," Heero mused as he decided how to hold Duo against him.

"Guess not," Duo replied as he took hold of Heero's arms and wrapped them around him. "Nobody gave him a head's up that I'm supposed to stay clueless about what happened to me."

"They will," Heero replied.

"I'm sure."

"What do you want?" Heero felt himself getting hard against Duo again, despite the fact that he felt exhausted.

"I don't know any more," Duo sighed and then said, "Milliardo also called me a dick for not giving him time to find a new 'security system' for his home. He doesn't understand why we gave up free rent in a home most people dream about owning."

Heero tried to imagine Milliardo saying 'dick' and couldn't. "I don't want to talk about him any longer."

He didn't have to see Duo smile to know that he was. "You are jealous."

"I want you," Heero replied and his arms pulled Duo tighter against him.

"I can feel that," Duo chuckled, "but I'm sore. That's a good reason not to go at it so rough the next time."

"There are other reasons, but I didn't mean sex."

"Oh." Duo was quiet and thoughtful and then he said, "I want you too. Milliardo doesn't have a chance."

Duo was warm and solid in Heero's arms. His feelings were suddenly very clear to him and the confusion dropped away. "This is love."

"Yeah," Duo replied.

It didn't require that they say anything else. Just the feeling was enough. Together they were two halves of a whole; a powerful force. Apart, they drifted and were lonely and uncertain about their future. Heero had never felt that way about anyone before and he didn't want to feel that way about anyone but Duo.

Heero's personal life was in order, now. His professional life and Duo's mysterious captivity was another thing. It felt strange to realize that, because of Duo, he had all the confidence in the world that, no matter what happened, everything would resolve itself for the better.

---------------------------------

"I told you that there was nothing they could do," Heero said as they left the medical building.

Duo pointed out, as he put hands in his coat pockets and led the way down a street filled with small restaurants and shops,"They gave you a different medication and suggested some injections of bio gel to cushion your knee joints. I don't call that nothing, especially when Preventer medical only offered you drugs that wouldn't have worked on a four year old and a pep talk."

Heero didn't remind Duo that their car was in the medical building's car park. Duo had a purpose and Heero couldn't think of a reason to stop him. They weren't due on the training field until the next morning and his knees, for once, didn't mind the walk. The drugs were helping and they weren't impairing his reaction time like the old medication. Still, he had been warned that feeling good and being good were two different things. He still needed to minimize any further damage to his joints.

Duo was wearing a black long coat with the sleeves rolled up, black jeans, ankle boots, and a shirt that said, where's the party? Heero knew it meant, where's the battle, but most people wouldn't. Duo's long braid was a bit messy, swinging in an untidy braid as he walked. He looked sixteen again and Heero found a small smile on his lips, remembering the previous night and how Duo had revealed his flexibility, despite his injuries, in interesting ways. He was definitely not a child and definitely not inhibited.

Heero was wearing a drab, olive Preventer t-shirt and khaki jeans. Combined with his rugged, well worn combat boots and dog tags, he breathed military. Duo had sighed when he had seen what he intended to wear, but he hadn't suggested Heero change. Duo didn't need military style clothing to advertise that he was a soldier and therefore dangerous. It was in the way he carried himself and the way his eyes automatically scanned everything around them, looking for trouble.

"A toy store?" Heero asked as he stopped and stared at the door to the shop.

Duo had the door open as he turned and gestured Heero to proceed him. He was smiling broadly. "Yes, a toy store. I have an idea how to get our physically challenged agents in training to improve their hand/eye coordination. Little balls, hand games, hackeysack..."

"Non issue equipment?"

Duo rolled his eyes. "Yes, non issue equipment. In case you haven't noticed, our trainees are all non issue."

Heero frowned. "I'll wait."

Duo looked exasperated."Why?"

"I'm not a child," Heero replied.

Duo rolled his eyes and left him on the sidewalk. The truth was harder to reveal. During attempts at therapy early after the war, Heero had been taught that some things were emotional triggers. It was why he couldn't stand puppies, young children, and some types of flowers. Not only did they remind him of horrible episodes in his life, but they also reminded him of painful things that his youth had lacked. He didn't want to be reminded that he had trained as an assassin when most children had been experimenting with finger paints and playing on playgrounds. A toy store would be rife with triggers.

The door to the shop swung open and a clerk with a cell phone stepped onto the sidewalk looking frantically around. Children and their parents streamed out after her looking anxious. The parents were holding the children tightly.

"He just went nuts!" the clerk was saying in the cell phone. "I need someone here, now, before he ruins my business! Dangerous? I don't know. He crawled under a counter yelling over and over, I'll tell you want you want, just stop hurting them! No, I don't know what that means."

Heero ran into the shop, gun coming out of its holster at the small of his back. "Duo?" he shouted. Duo had his own triggers, but Heero never imagined that a trip into a toy store might be one of them.

A table had turned over, plush animal toys all over the floor. A bag full of balls and toss bags was on the floor near a cash register. Heero recognized Duo's wallet on the floor next to them, open and askew, cash half out and change scattered.

"Maxwell?" Heero tried as he slowly approached the back of the store and a table covered in children's books. Some of them had tumbled over and were on the floor. The space under the table was shadowed, but he could just make out the tail of Duo's coat. "It's Heero, Maxwell," Heero replied. "Watch your fire."

Heero slowly crouched, gun pointed at his lover. He wasn't certain if he would shoot, but training wouldn't allow him to approach an armed man any other way. He could see a shadow facing away from him, tucked into the corner as if hiding.

"I don't want to see!" Duo exclaimed, his voice trembling with emotion. "I don't want to see! Don't make me look! Don't! I don't want to see! Tell me what to say! I'll tell you anything! Just ask me something. Ask me! Tell me what to do to make you stop."

He sounded like a broken man. His image of Duo, proof against any torture, shattered. Duo had been compromised. Whatever they had done to Duo, it had been above and beyond anything he had experienced before. It was obvious that he had told his captors everything they had wanted to know.... but in exchange for what? For not tazing him again? Heero couldn't believe that to be the extent of the coercion. The clerk had said...

"Stop hurting them!" Duo begged in a pathetic voice that was mostly sobs. "You don't have to hurt them."

Them. Heero knew that Duo had fought for revenge during the war, but he had often told Heero that he had also fought so that others wouldn't have to. Heero recalled him risking a great deal, even his life on several occasions, to protect civilians. Especially children.

Children. Toy store. Heero understood with sudden clarity that made his gut clench. If a child didn't get the toy that he wanted, he was most likely going to cry about it. If Duo's trigger was children crying...

Heero shut down the speculation about why that might be so. He had to keep a clear head. He had to get Duo under control before the man decided that he was not bound and that he was armed and capable of saving children from danger... even memories of children.

"Maxwell, I need you on my six!" Heero barked. "Respond!"

Instinct. Love. Training. Whatever it was, Duo responded at once. He floundered, rolled out from under the table, and had his gun up and nosing for a target as he moved to Heero's side in a crouch. His pupils were blown, his skin pale, and his hands were shaking.

Heero heard footsteps behind them, probably officers coming through the front door to handle a situation they were unprepared for. He had a second to act and he hated the one option left to him. His fist shot out and took Duo in the jaw. The man hit the floor, unconscious, gun still in his hand.

"Don't move!" an officer ordered loudly. Heero held up his hands and didn't turn. A man approached slowly and took his gun.

"Preventer ID in my back pocket," Heero informed him. The man dug for it and pulled it out.

"It's legit!" the man called to someone else and then to Heero, "Mind telling me what the hell's going on agent?"

"I'll tell you as soon as I find out," Heero growled and checked Duo's pulse.

-------------------------------------

"Crying children?" Une sighed as she handed Heero back his palm computer. Sitting at her office desk, she steepled her fingers and looked very hard at nothing.

"He didn't become violent," Heero replied, "But there wasn't enough observation time to determine if he might have escalated into violence."

"You nearly broke his jaw," Une commented as if her thoughts were not on that subject at all.

Heero rubbed at his still sore knuckles. One was swollen and purple. "I needed to make certain that he would go down."

"And how do you feel about that?" Une asked, her eyes suddenly focusing on Heero with the penetration of a laser.

Heero felt measured minutely as he replied, "I didn't want to hurt, Duo. If I had been given proper intelligence, that particular trigger could have been avoided."

"To what end?" Une wondered. "Shouldn't we discover all of Duo's triggers, to keep the public safe?"

"Children were at risk," Heero argued angrily.

"Were they?" Une asked bluntly, a slim eyebrow raising over the rim of her glasses.

Heero evaluated his memory of the incident. "No," he amended."Not the children, but anyone who might have appeared to be a threat."

"Not you?" Une pressed.

"No," Heero agreed.

Une was silent. Heero shifted feet impatiently.

"We found him hanging like a side of beef in an empty warehouse," Une explained. "They tortured him. We found evidence that children had been there. They wanted us to know that, but nothing else. The lab is still trying to find DNA evidence, but they scrubbed everything down, including Duo. What he remembers, Yuy, is of great interest to us, but only if it doesn't break him. We're walking in a minefield, trying to gather clues."

Heero admitted, "He knows you're drugging him, but he says that he can remember when ever he chooses."

"Betraying confidences?" Une asked, but she didn't look surprised. "How do you feel about that?"

"How I feel matters?" Heero asked with a frown.

"Very much so," Une replied. She picked up a pen and tapped it on her desk. "You understand Duo more than anyone else, I believe. How you deal with him, how you react emotionally, can determine how this will all play out."

"What is your objective?"

"To find out who did this," Une replied as she tossed the pen onto the desk with a clatter and sighed. "To find out if I can save the man while rooting out whether he's been compromised."

"He's stronger than you believe," Heero said challengingly.

"He's weaker than you believe," Une replied sadly. "Stop seeing the man who fought a war with you, Yuy, and see the man who may have reached his limit."

"Why the secrecy?" Heero demanded. "Mistakes were made."

"I don't consider them mistakes," Une replied. "I consider them insights."

"I don't understand what you expect from me," Heero snarled. "I want all the facts."

"You said that he knows them already, if he chooses to remember them," Une reminded him. "Maybe he hasn't chosen to tell you."

"Are you still considering him a mole, or was that a lie?" Heero demanded.

"Not a lie, just one part of the whole," Une replied and then made a dismissing gesture. "He needs you to watch him carefully, especially in medical. They're keeping him under until you go there to take him home."

"I don't think that we can train the agents under these circumstances," Heero complained. "Duo doesn't need that kind of responsibility now."

"You're wrong," Une replied. "He needs it like a man needs water. I'm sure you know that very well."

She was done, opening her computer and going over files as if Heero didn't exist any longer. Heero turned on his heel and stalked out of her office, ignoring the agents in the outer offices as he left Preventer headquarters and entered medical.

He should have known better than to attempt to understand a woman who could spin a web of confusion and intrigue with the skill of a black widow spider.

TBC
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