Unity Ark: Book 1 Weapon Malfunctions, The

Ark: Unity
Book: The Weapon Malfunctions
Author: Zimmerie Kanoah
Warnings: Angst, depression, language, nudity, break down, rebirth, sexual themes, adult content, men with men, past references, sex, kissing, masturbation, fantasying about these things, (and just in case you don’t understand and I don’t want to get in trouble ), all these things happen between two men. Except for some of the Relena things. I suppose I should warn about that. Relationship-ish between Heero and Relena.(past) I think that sums it up. That is over all warnings. If there is something extra that I feel you should be warned about in a specific chapter I will let you know. Please don’t scroll through my warnings. Thanks.
Genre: Angst!!!!
AN: This is going to be in Heero’s POV for the whole book. I’m not entirely sure how many chapters there will be some will be long others short. This book centers around Heero. This is the beginning of the Unity Ark that I promised my readers. If you are not in the mood to stay tuned to an epic angst ark then you can read the shortened more confusing Abridged version and it is named Unity.
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing or anything associated to that show. Please do not steal this idea. I am simply writing this story for the enjoyment of doing it and the enjoyment of others when they read. I am by no means making any kind of money.
Extra Warning: So Heero is really starting to loose it here people. And before anyone says anything yes I know he’s OOC it’s on purpose but I figured you already knew that but just in case. I actually didn’t plan on having so much background before he broke down but I realized that this is much better and far more fun.

Chapter Four

Three days, ten hours, thirty minuets, twenty nine seconds.

I’ll have to pick my gun up and point it at someone again.

Three days, ten hours, twenty six minuets, twelve seconds.

I’ll have to wage war against someone that wants to disrupt what I have worked for.

Three days, ten hours, twenty two minuets, thirty seconds.

I may even have to shed blood again.

Three days, ten hours, eighteen minuets, two seconds.

Why am I even counting the seconds?

Three days, ten hours, fourteen minuets, twenty two seconds.

I really am loosing it…
I sigh and roll over onto my side. What was wrong with me? Should I ask Chang? No that wouldn’t be a smart idea, he might turn my in for evaluation and then I wouldn’t be there to protect Relena. What if I am crazy and I loose it completely at the conference and ball? I could jeopardize everything that way. No that wouldn’t happen I have never botched a mission. Well there was that one time during the war….

Three days, ten hours, ten minuets, ten seconds.

Huh that was weird. Ten, ten, ten all in a role. I really need to get some sleep I’m starting to sound like Duo. Why wasn’t I sleeping? Oh right I can’t get myself to sleep. No matter how hard I try I just can’t sleep. I’m just not tired. Insomnia I think, which is never good for anybody. If I ask Sally Po for some sleeping pills I wonder if they’d work. Would she keep it a secret? Probably not it would go against her morals. Fucking morals.

Three days, two hours, thirteen minuets, five seconds.

Wait where did all the time go? What the fuck have I been doing since I last noted the time? Why am I all sweaty?

I sit up and realize that everything in my apartment is perfectly arranged again. Even the muddy carpet looks like it was just wet vac-ed. I can even see all the perfect lines all in a roll where the vacuum head has gone over it. Why don’t I remember this?

I look down at my hands and they are red as if I have been scrubbing for hours, which apparently I have been. I bring them up to my nose and I can smell dawn dish soap, bleach, and lemon pinesol. I shut my eyes tight and fist my hands in my hair. I want to remember what I had been doing. I have to remember.

//Flash//

No, no can’t have this like that. To dirty, not perfect, has to be perfect.

I’m scrubbing the counters in the bathroom, no wait the tiles.

//Flash//

I’m in the kitchen cleaning all my dishes, but I know they were clean. I cleaned the ones that were in the sink when I got home.

Everything has to be in perfect order. Nothing out of place. Is this a spec of dirt or just a scratch? A scratch? Can’t have that, messes up my order. I toss the plate into the garbage where I here it shatter at the bottom of the bin.

//Flash//

The wet vac is the sound that greets me this time and I see my self meticulously going over ever inch of carpet. Perfect little horizontal lines from the living room to my room. None going a different direction. I even moved the furniture to clean underneath them.

Can’t have any disorder none at all. I am in complete control of everything. I have won. I’ve won. I deserve this. I deserve perfection. I deserve everything to be in order.

Why am I so obsessed?

//Flash//

I’m going threw my clothes tearing everything out of the drawers and my closet. I’m looking over every inch of every piece of clothing. Anything that has a stain a slight snag anything that doesn’t look new I’m tossing out. This isn’t me. I’m not wasteful like this. What am I doing that for?

Nope this is all out of disorder. I must change it, I can’t have it this way. I didn’t fight all this time to have my own place like this!

//Flash//

I’m straightening all the pictures I have hung on my wall in the hallway with a leveler. I can see each picture but for a moment but Suddenly I’m snapping my eyes open and dashing to the same picture that caught my eye in the hallway when I was thinking back.

I stare at it, eyes puzzling. What about this picture makes me feel as if it is important? I take it off the wall and hold it in front of me. It still isn’t making sense but something about it calms me. But why?

I slowly walk back to my bed while inspecting the photo. It’s of a safe house in the middle of a forest. Large old trees surrounding it. Oak, maple, different pine types, a few weeping willows, a couple crab apple trees in full blossom. My eyes soften, it was a beautiful place, but I couldn’t remember where it was.

Somewhere up in the mountains. It was always kinda cold there even though it had been the summer time. Blue skies clean air. It was practically untouched by the world as I now of it today. Something about it being impractical to put a base there or try to re populate the area. The Winners had bought the mountain side I think. Maybe if I looked it up, I could remember why it felt so important to me.

Suddenly my eyes feel heavy and I’m falling backwards into my bed. And then quiet quickly I’m asleep.