What I series
folder
Gundam Wing/AC › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult
Chapters:
6
Views:
483
Reviews:
1
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Gundam Wing/AC › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult
Chapters:
6
Views:
483
Reviews:
1
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
Dun own Gundam Wing. *sniffs* Make no money. *cries*
Don't Understand ~ Trowa
Title: What I Don't Understand ~ Trowa
Author: Makoto Sagara
Archive: The usual suspects... Anywhere new - please drop me a line.
Series: What I... Series
Category: Angst
Pairing: 3+4, mention of 2x5 and 4+3, R+4, and 1+R
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: shounen ai, het, angst, language, post EW
Disclaimers: Make no money. Own nothing. Poor me!
A/N: I'm not even sure what made me take this up again. I've been working diligently on MA and my HYD fics and a few others that this sort of popped up out of the blue. I don't know if this is the last of this series. I still have Dorothy, Noin, Zechs, Une, Sally, and Cathy that I can play with like this. Should be interesting, right? Please R&R.
What I Don't Understand
There are many things in this world that confuse me, even now. I never went to a real school like Relena, Wufei or Quatre. I never had anyone that really, truly cared for me, like Duo. And I've never had a real mentor, like Heero. I've always just been myself, struggling through the world to find out who I am and what I want. I've always been a cold-blooded killer.
I'm sure that that is not the case. I'm sure that once, I had a loving family with warm parents. However, I don't remember that at all. I am Nanashi, No Name. I am Trowa Barton. I am Cathy's adopted brother. I am... hollow.
You are the sun. How could I ever hope to be able to stand in your brilliance and not get blinded? How could I not see it all that time when we were together on Earth? How could I let myself develop these feelings? I knew that I couldn't afford to get attached to anyone during the wars. Those kinds of bonds leave one vulnerable to torture and other things with the enemy looming around every corner.
I suppose my first step towards weakness happened when I meet Cathy and the rest of the circus performers. There was something familiar and warm about her. It just made me want to bury my head in her lap and cry. Such an embarrassing and uncharacteristic feeling that was. I'd never once really felt like crying, and all it took was a few moments of sweetness from a complete stranger to make me want to dissolve into tears like a child.
I can feel your eyes on me. They burn holes in what's left of my soul. The look in your eyes scares and excites me. How could I ever ask you what that means?
I see the way that Relena looks at you, Quatre. It is one of sadness and longing. It's the same look that Heero has for her. We are a pathetic lot, are we not? The only ones out of all of us who survived the wars that are not lonely are Duo and Wufei. They have managed to find solace in one another. I commend them, even if a part of me detests them. I suppose it's jealousy for what they have. That seems the most logical.
Stop looking at me. I don't understand you. What do you want? Why do you make me feel so anxious?
What I don't understand could fill libraries, but what I do understand is that I am no longer content here alone. Just stop staring at me with those sad, lust-filled eyes. They make my heart race. They make my blood boil. They make me want you more than I can even say. Just stop.
Go away.
Come here.
Argh!
Never mind.
Author: Makoto Sagara
Archive: The usual suspects... Anywhere new - please drop me a line.
Series: What I... Series
Category: Angst
Pairing: 3+4, mention of 2x5 and 4+3, R+4, and 1+R
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: shounen ai, het, angst, language, post EW
Disclaimers: Make no money. Own nothing. Poor me!
A/N: I'm not even sure what made me take this up again. I've been working diligently on MA and my HYD fics and a few others that this sort of popped up out of the blue. I don't know if this is the last of this series. I still have Dorothy, Noin, Zechs, Une, Sally, and Cathy that I can play with like this. Should be interesting, right? Please R&R.
What I Don't Understand
There are many things in this world that confuse me, even now. I never went to a real school like Relena, Wufei or Quatre. I never had anyone that really, truly cared for me, like Duo. And I've never had a real mentor, like Heero. I've always just been myself, struggling through the world to find out who I am and what I want. I've always been a cold-blooded killer.
I'm sure that that is not the case. I'm sure that once, I had a loving family with warm parents. However, I don't remember that at all. I am Nanashi, No Name. I am Trowa Barton. I am Cathy's adopted brother. I am... hollow.
You are the sun. How could I ever hope to be able to stand in your brilliance and not get blinded? How could I not see it all that time when we were together on Earth? How could I let myself develop these feelings? I knew that I couldn't afford to get attached to anyone during the wars. Those kinds of bonds leave one vulnerable to torture and other things with the enemy looming around every corner.
I suppose my first step towards weakness happened when I meet Cathy and the rest of the circus performers. There was something familiar and warm about her. It just made me want to bury my head in her lap and cry. Such an embarrassing and uncharacteristic feeling that was. I'd never once really felt like crying, and all it took was a few moments of sweetness from a complete stranger to make me want to dissolve into tears like a child.
I can feel your eyes on me. They burn holes in what's left of my soul. The look in your eyes scares and excites me. How could I ever ask you what that means?
I see the way that Relena looks at you, Quatre. It is one of sadness and longing. It's the same look that Heero has for her. We are a pathetic lot, are we not? The only ones out of all of us who survived the wars that are not lonely are Duo and Wufei. They have managed to find solace in one another. I commend them, even if a part of me detests them. I suppose it's jealousy for what they have. That seems the most logical.
Stop looking at me. I don't understand you. What do you want? Why do you make me feel so anxious?
What I don't understand could fill libraries, but what I do understand is that I am no longer content here alone. Just stop staring at me with those sad, lust-filled eyes. They make my heart race. They make my blood boil. They make me want you more than I can even say. Just stop.
Go away.
Come here.
Argh!
Never mind.