We Read Our Own Porn

This time, Vegeta made sure the bedroom door was locked before pushing Goten onto the bed for a heated makeout. The demi Saiyan wrapped his legs happily around him, first teasing his throbbing heat lightly with one playful hand.  “Goten!” Vegeta’s teeth sunk instinctively into the side of his throat, half muffling his greedily lusty moans. Like Goten, he was in no mood for delays, for any reason. “You looked so calm and cool all day.” Goten’s deep, black eyes were half closed, and shone with desire to match his attractively blushed cheeks. “I love watching you lose that, just for me.” “That’s why I like watching your face.” Vegeta’s hand was giving him the same treatment, for the lust-drunken look that he was fond of. Understanding, Goten kneaded him properly for the same favor, which nearly made their vision blurr with longing. Hastily, Goten tugged down Vegeta’s sweatpants and undershorts, kneeling to tongue-lash all the right places of his rigid member. Both of Vegeta’s hands clutched at random handfuls of shaggy hair, and luckily there was no need to keep quiet, as he didn’t even try. Getting the message, Goten engulfed him properly, obliged to hold onto the base of his lover’s shaft to keep from choking. When his grip loosened, Goten pushed him back on the pillow and climbed onto the bed again, his tongue still busy in the warmth of his gently sucking mouth. Among intensely pleasured groans, Vegeta’s hand clawed sporadically at his T-shirt. That sometimes felt like a submissive act, Vegeta thought, when he was clearly being sucked by his sub. It was as though he were giving him part of his ki with his climax, or maybe another sort of energy. But Goten gave him something as well, that he could no longer do without. It was an exchange, he acknowledged, but why was he thinking of such things now, when he was simply ready to explode? Discretely, Goten observed him. Vegeta rarely made much of a fuss in bed, rather he preferred to quietly yet totally immerse himself in the experience. Not that he was complaining, and lots of physical tension had built up for them both that day. His free hand took Vegeta’s, who enlaced their fingers, squeezing them in staccato grips in time to his building contractions. Feeling his climax near, Vegeta roughly seized a handful of hair again, shoving him hard into his crotch to fuck his mouth. Goten held him still with a disapproving sound, purposefully slowing his sucking mouth to more completely lash his tongue over the places that drove him crazy. Vegeta’s body stiffened, and a strangled growl became a soft, ecstatic groan as he came in warm, pulsing jets in Goten’s mouth before relaxing.  “Thank you,” Vegeta sighed in true relief, his eyes closing. “You’re welcome.” Goten smiled at his choice of words, but they were sincere, and he could kiss him all he wanted now.  “Hey, calm down,” Vegeta admonished him, but liked when his affection matched his hormonal level.  “Easy for you to say,” Goten pointed out sulkily, though it was quickly forgotten, and replaced with a mischievous smile. “I just thought of the sexiest game.“  Vegeta’s hand was already stroking him again, lightly and playfully through his shorts. “Yeah? Tell me.” “A challenge, where we take turns,” Goten explained, “One does everything he can to make the other come, but the other resists as long as he can - no moving allowed, though. The one to last longer wins.“  Vegeta smiled slowly. “I like that. Of course, I would easily win, but that’s okay,” he replied confidently, returning to his short prelude. “I see your challenge, but I think I’m turning blue,” Goten declared. Indeed, he was trembling intensely with short breathing, and pulled Vegeta fully onto him.  “Subtle message received.” Vegeta sunk into his embrace and wanton kiss, into which he could immerse himself and easily lose track of time. But the demi Saiyan would not let him at that moment, pulling his hand between his legs with a desperate moan. Understandingly, Vegeta pulled down his shorts and underwear to admiringly trace his rigid, leaking shaft. “That does look painful,” he admitted, quickly taking it into his warm mouth before he might scream, as his face suggested.  Beyond a small, pleasured exclamation, Goten was stilled to silence. Vegeta seemed to know precisely what he wanted before he knew it himself, and for the moment, he was content to quietly ride the sparkling waves of sensation. When they intensified, he could not help clutching handfuls of his hair and shirt, ending the quiet phase. It was nice to let go, which his senpai understood. On his side, Vegeta considered a different angle of his earlier thought. The contrarily submissive act gave him a sense of power, in that he made him feel and react any way he pleased. Power struggles were primal instincts that heightened their excitement. Gently, he stroked Goten’s painfully tightened balls, making him inhale sharply. “Yeah… perfect!” Goten managed, petting his hair affectionately. He’d thought it would be over too quickly, but the fullblooded Saiyan brought him such an exquisite mix of teasing and promising sensations, it stunned him. Vegeta really enjoyed pleasing him, he realized in wonder, feeling his slippery, scissoring fingers work their magic inside him. In these instants of bliss, he completely lost himself in it. He was lasting longer than he’d anticipated, but when the other male’s hand softly rubbed his balls while slowing his sucking, that was it. The muscles in his thighs clenching uncontrollably, he balled the sheets in his fists, his head thrown back in small, ecstatic sobs. “You turn me on like crazy,” Vegeta voiced breathlessly before going back to work, feeling his cock jerk in his mouth. At his words, Goten’s body stiffened with such a long and powerful climax, it left him dazed and seeing stars for quite some time, basking in his afterglow. It was surprisingly enough for now, as both were content and relaxed. Goten seemed so fragile at times, Vegeta thought, watching him as he rested. After a few tranquil minutes, he suggested, “We should be setting up the house pretty soon.” His query was met with silence, before Goten replied, “So soon?” His voice was peculiarly hollow. “Well, it’s rather awkward here,” he explained, adding on a lighter note, “I also want you all to myself.“  That brought a small smile to Goten’s face. He was quickly learning that Vegeta was not as different from his fantasy version as he’d thought, which made his head spin with a contrast of elation and fear. Sometimes, he worried that he would wake up and see that it had all been just a dream.  At his dull expression, Vegeta’s smile faded. “Something wrong?” “No,” Goten replied automatically, “It’s just kind of sudden.” It was what they’d planned, though for some reason, he was finding it difficult to keep his sang-froid. He could not keep a mask on forever, but hadn’t thought it would slip so soon.  Please, no, he conjured whichever god may be listening, Don’t let me crack now. The one he loved may see too soon, and decide he was too screwed up to deal with. Vegeta’s face turned serious. “We have the same defense armor.” His finger traced the center of his chest with a tinge of sadness, as though he could actually touch it. “Don’t close up on me.” “It’s not that,” Goten promised, “I was just thinking.“     Vegeta was silent at his turn. He made him happy in the way he could, but whatever had disturbed him for so long could not simply vanish. Or maybe what they had was not as it appeared, once dragged into the too often ugly light of reality. “Is it too soon for you, or did you change your mind?”     “No!” Goten looked up at his hardened, expressionless face in panic. “Did you?” “Why would I do that, since I asked?” Vegeta’s sudden impatience calmed, though he was confused by the demi’s sudden mood swings. “I don’t know.” Goten looked down in embarassment, unable to shake his angst. “Do you really love me?” “You have to ask me that?” Puzzled, Vegeta hesitated. “Goten, you’re not talking to your instructor now. And whatever it is has gone on too long. Don’t you think it’s time to tell me about it?“  Goten’s struggle was evident in his face as he idly traced a paisley pattern on his navy blue bedspread. “How can I tell you what I can’t explain to myself?” “You don’t believe I’d think lesser of you?” Vegeta asked soberly. Goten’s shoulders slumped. “I don’t know.” He kept his eyes averted, clearly uncomfortable around the subject.  “Well, I won’t.” Despite his discovery that he could write his thoughts, Vegeta was clumsy at verbal expression. “Everyone goes through difficult times.“  “That’s just it,” Goten exclaimed in sudden irritation, “All I ever heard is how everyone else’s life was so difficult, and how I’ve had an ‘easy life’. Well, they’re wrong.” He folded his arms bitterly.  Now we’re getting somewhere. “I know.”  Goten propped his head on one hand. “Sorry. Maybe I do have too many hormones. They’re not always fun.” Vegeta nodded slowly at his reluctance. “Since your brain’s going to make them anyway, you might as well channel them in a better way.” He held out his arms, into which Goten gladly fell, seeming to remember who he was talking to. “Take your time, yeah? We’ll stay here for now, and take care of that when you’re ready.” Patiently, Vegeta played with his hair as he liked, until he gradually relaxed.   He would do that for him? Goten looked up seriously and took his cheeks in his hands for a soft kiss. Now that he mentioned it… It felt good to be held tightly in Vegeta’s arms, and he could not recall ever feeling so safe. He does love me, Goten thought in wonder, and his affection became more intense. Hormones, oh yeah, definitely. Vegeta had to smile despite being nearly strangled, reflecting that a near concussion had been worth it for him. ’Kawaii’, the manga he’d flipped through was captioned a lot, but the word paled in his eyes. Mine was a better word. Goten shoved him onto his back, feeling a tremor pass through them both as he aggressively kissed him, his tongue darting provocatively between his lips while his hands groped him. “I want you, Vegeta.” He’d paused to see which position his senpai wanted, not surprised to be roughly flipped onto his back at his turn. The demi Saiyan’s eyes closed, scarcely hearing what he said, but it was smooth and reassuring. A desperate longing overwhelmed him when Vegeta peeled off his clothes, and he reached up to do the same. Tan, satiny skin was pressed to his own, warm and inviting beneath his touch. On one hand, he could stay that way forever; on the other, he needed him in the worst way, and now. He wrapped his legs back around him, pulling him into place. Then he was inside him, slippery, stretching him, and hitting his sweet spot to perfection, every time. Small moans from them both became progressively louder, and the bed springs squeaked beneath their exertions. Goten’s newly pulsing manhood rubbed against Vegeta’s skin with each mutual thrust, which drove him insane. The fullblooded Saiyan had trained his bangs to go back into the rest of his hair like his father’s, but in this position with much exertion, often they fell back down. Goten loved it, and purposefully pulled them down to admire the look. It would usually made Vegeta blush with embarassed annoyance, but at such a moment, he could not care less. “Oh gods!” Goten’s head was thrown back, with the expression his lover adored, and was rewarded with heated kissing and the caresses he most loved. He could no longer live without him, Goten thought, not for the first time. Whatever it took to make him happy, he would do so. Others who gave them strange looks could just fuck off. There was nothing he would not do for him, he swore as he reached his blinding climax. Vegeta’s sadistic side had kicked in, and he let the relentless ecstasy slowly build, until he was satisfied with Goten’s pleading sobs. Then he took hold of Goten’s weeping shaft and pumped it in time to his thrusts, which would later explain why his back was clawed to hell. Goten’s back arched before his body stiffened with his climax, abundantly wetting them both before he relaxed, still trembling as he thrusted back, fingering Vegeta’s sensitive tail spot and his balls in turn. Vegeta clenched his teeth, usually preferring to come much later, but the demi Saiyan turned him on like nothing else, and he was thrusting uncontrollably, slamming the headboard into the wall. Later, they might be concerned about the hole in the wall, or the possibility of the small bed collapsing beneath them, but definitely not at that moment. Exclaiming incoherently as he pinned him down, he sunk his teeth into the side of Goten’s throat as he came in warm, electric jolts inside him. It seemed to last longer than usual, before his body went limp in Goten’s soft embrace. They beheld their afterglow as some sacred rite, and when it tapered off, they exchanged a small, mysterious smile. Their union was sacred, they realized at that moment, despite their lighthearted moods. Glancing at what he could see of the side of his neck and shoulder, covered in bruises and fresh, bloody teethmarks, Goten asked in amusement. “Why do you always bite me like that?” The question made Vegeta realize just what it was between them, which gave him an idea for his next chapter. “Besides the obvious, I’ll need to explain that part of our heritage,” he replied mysteriously, though Goten suspected that some part of him instinctively knew. They spent most of their free time exactly where they were, in a frenzy of non-stop lovemaking; sometimes savagely against the wall, other times more gently, both left in a euphoric cocoon. Intimacy was something that Vegeta took very seriously, Goten had quickly learned. Though he was quite hesitant to start something, it was just as intense once it did. He seemed to be contemplating Goten as well, and commented, “You’re really flexible.“ Not that it was the first time he noticed. “Like you.” Goten smiled lazily. “And you wondered why I was always distracted for so long.” “So distracted you had Trunks worried,” Vegeta reminded him, but could not help being flattered. “I couldn’t tell him I just wanted you.” “That was your last year?” Vegeta asked, remembering the notebooks.     “Uhm…” Goten searched his mind for diplomacy, finding none. “…no.“  Both looked away in what should have been embarassment, but instead laughed. Still, Vegeta considered him thoughtfully. “I think I see part of it.” Playing with Vegeta’s dishevelled hair, Goten paused, guessing his thought of the probable sources of his chagrin. “Vegeta, I know you aren’t very comfortable here, and time alone when we want’ll be nice.” Vegeta considered the demi Saiyan beside him, who was playing with his bangs again. “Why don’t we see about that later, okay? There’s no rush.” “It’s not that what bothers me,” Goten said quickly, “Believe me. I just want you to be happy.” His wide eyes watched his future mate. Vegeta ruffled his hair. “No worries there, ‘Ten. But we can’t do much about it tonight, anyway.” He glanced at Goten’s digital clock. “Come on.“ Still having a little time, they cleaned up and redressed before going downstairs. And discovered the mess. “Bad kitties!” Goten scolded, watching them hide guiltily behind an armchair. Vegeta only groaned before the half hour it took them to clean up a broken vase, a potted plant, several dishes, and similar items. The scolding didn’t last long, however, as just afterward when they sat on the couch, Goten called them to his lap with apologetic pettings for leaving them for so long. Vegeta shook his head, but said nothing. He sometimes felt disoriented of late, no longer so sure of who he was - it had all happened so fast - but Goten’s presence reassured him. ChiChi returned a bit later with a bag in hand. “Goten, are you trying to turn him into a cat person?” Vegeta snorted. “Not exactly. If you saw the mess they made…” he declared, then closed his mouth. “What’s for dinner?” he asked casually.  “What did they break?” ChiChi sighed. “A vase that just collected dust, the pot of your aloe vera plant, but I replanted it, some dishes we rarely use, a couple glass picture frames, and your potpourri is now Vanilla Spice-scented confetti,” Goten reported. ChiChi blinked. “Weren’t you watching them?” Both were quiet, before Goten replied, “We cleaned it up.” “Goten…” ChiChi warned. Goten glanced at Vegeta, both remaining mute. She changed the subject. “Well, there’s a ton of groceries waiting for muscle. Up.” Goten set the two kittens aside, and he and Vegeta stepped out, returning with multiple grocery bags hoisted effortlessly in their arms. They set them down in the kitchen, the three of them talking casually while putting them away. “You’ll both be useful for hunting and fishing,” ChiChi told them, “Meat is getting way too expensive, and I hit three markets.” “Sure,” Goten replied uneasily. * After a copious dinner, the three of them talked over the tea that ChiChi always prepared. “We’ll be setting up the house soon,” Goten told ChiChi, “Vegeta wants to take our time, though.” Not missing Vegeta’s regard from her to Goten, ChiChi replied, “Of course. There’s no rush.” But she stared into her cup and frowned, clearly not keen on the idea of them leaving. An insistant look from Vegeta could hardly be ignored, so she told Goten, “Go feed the cats, in the pantry.” The demi Saiyan complied, mumbling about possible names for theirs and ChiChi’s kittens. When he’d left the kitchen, ChiChi asked Vegeta in a lowered voice, “Did he tell you?” “No. He says it’s nothing, but the mood swings don’t make sense,” Vegeta replied, “I’m trying to get him to talk to me, but I’m not sure how.” “You’re a lot alike,” ChiChi observed, both stopping their conversation when Goten reappeared, and they were interrupted by a knock at the door. She stood to go answer it, and the Saiyans followed curiously but slowly. “Hello, Trunks. 17,” she bade, standing aside for them to enter, “What brings you here?” Trunks held up a modest travel bag. “Dad, you forgot one of the bags you packed,” he explained, “Mostly training clothes.” Vegeta nodded and accepted it, with a sharp glare at 17’s stifled smirk for the words ‘forgot’ and ‘training clothes’ in the same sentence. “17’s going back to his place, and it’s on the way,” Trunks concluded.  “Those are my spare training clothes,” Vegeta informed them dryly, “And you mean you’re going back with him.”   “Yeah.” 17 grinned, offering Goten a handshake. “Going well?“  “Sure,” Goten replied cheerfully, “And you?” 17 held up a peace sign. “Hey, your hair looks cool,” he commented to Vegeta.  “I thought so, too,” ChiChi agreed, studying the change. Vegeta’s hand strayed to his newly replaced bangs, having forgotten about them. “Goten likes it that way,” he waved off, but disliked the comments.  “There’s plenty of tea left,” ChiChi offered the younger men, but Trunks glanced at his watch. “Thanks, but we can’t stay long,” he declined, “Dad, can I talk to you a second?” He motioned for ChiChi to sit down as well. At Goten’s confused look, 17 dragged him out the back door. “Hey, you gotta see this. It works like a charm.” He patted his holster and Goten followed him out, looking back suspiciously.  17 looked around and picked up an old piece of wood, which he blocked onto a tree branch. He took his pistol from his holster and a familiar looking gadget from his pocket. He’d removed a part of Goten’s makeshift tool and made some changes, the result of which he attatched to the barrel. Goten followed him to about a hundred yards away, watching as he took careful aim and fired. It made only a muted foosh sound, and they went to look at the target, now with an exact bullseye. “Whoa.” Impressed, Goten touched the bullet hole that was still smoking.  “Wanna try?” the Android offered with a grin. “Nah. We don’t need to,” Goten brushed off, his thoughts elsewhere.  “Me neither, it’s just fun,” 17 explained lightly, reholstering the pistol, “Actually, I wanted to ask if everything’s okay.” “Yeah,” Goten replied, puzzled at the question, “Why’s everyone asking me that?” “I meant, sometimes one doesn’t tell their partner certain things, like to not worry them or make any waves. We don’t know each other very well, but I’m always free for a chat.“  Goten considered the Android, reflecting that though he personally had nothing against him, he’d never heard his side of the story. “Well, thanks,” he replied clumsily, “But everything’s fine.” “Maybe not now,” 17 told him smoothly, “But if you need to talk, we gotta look out for one another. So feel free, okay?” “Sure, sniper.” Goten grinned and they headed back into the house. When they entered, the other three stopped talking. He looked questioningly at 17, who shrugged. “You had to show off your new toy, didn’t you?” Trunks joked. “Yep,” 17 replied cheerfully, adding, “We should be on our way.“  ChiChi and the two Saiyans watched them fly away, until they became two small dots on the horizon of the multicolored sunset. “Trunks could’ve just told me, ‘step out so we can talk about you,’” Goten commented sullenly, folding his arms. “He’s just concerned about you, Goten,” ChiChi informed him. “You mean ‘concerned’ like he doesn’t approve of us?” Goten retorted. He stood unmoving against the wall, making Vegeta and himself look like bookends. “No,” Vegeta assured him, “He’s been saying the same things for a long time, and I would tell you if it were more.“  “A long time is relative,“ Goten reasoned, “He’s also known for a long time. He’s being a hypocrite.“  “We can speak confidentially later, but it’s nothing new,” Vegeta promised.  Goten gave a nod and said no more, tucking his thoughts aside as always. Vegeta noticed, also saying nothing. ChiChi watched them over the next few days, and despite an expected tension, she saw now what was different. Vegeta had certainly mellowed out over time, but around Goten, he was himself, without seeing the need for his invisible shield.     On his side, Goten understood him in his way, even in his irrational moments when he yelled at everyone to leave him alone, then silently lamented having no one to talk to. Whatever he’d said to her son now made his dark look fade, replaced by a serene smile. She had no reason to worry for him, which was as close to a stamp of approval as ChiChi would get. * The weather proved to be excellent for their day at Kasumi-Mori, pleasantly warm with a cool breeze, and the sun peeking intermittently from an azure sky behind cottony white clouds. Right after noon was perfect, when the mist from the waterfall lifted for a clear view of the surroundings.  It was a beautiful, secluded haven, even the birds overhead singing of tranquility and freedom. Goten’s eyes sparkled in wonder as the two of them scrutinized the topography, and Vegeta seemed more serene. They quickly found an ideal patch of land for the house, bordered by willows that hovered over the water downstream. “The mist will make it invisible,” Goten observed. “Nice change for me,” Vegeta replied, “I really hated living in the city.“         “I know.” Goten watched as he tossed open the capsule, reflecting that perhaps he wouldn’t feel the constant need to lock himself in anymore. They walked in to take a look. Even Vegeta had never actually seen it, aside from its blueprints. Beyond an added training room, it was modest in size with some basic furnishings, but it was comfortable. Outside, the soft whirring of the waterfall made a pleasant white noise, and a fresh, woodsy scent drifted in through the opened windows. It was a house one would with fondness call home, or wish it were if it were not.  If it were not. Goten’s smile faded, replaced by a dark expression that was gone as soon as it appeared. At Vegeta’s questioning look, he replied, “I thought I forgot something.” Vegeta said nothing, and hadn’t for the last few days. He deemed silent brooding normal for himself, but the same from Goten left him perplexed. Hypocritical, perhaps, yet it was his thought. The younger male would speak when he was ready. To Goten, he improvised, “Scared me there. I thought you meant your binder.“  Goten laughed. “No way. I can handle Mom seeing us asleep, but that is nightmare material.“     Vegeta grinned. “Exactly. We should hide it before we forget.” He led him cleverly toward the bedroom, not missing his ambivalent expression. Slightly manipulative, perhaps, but the idea was to move the things he saw as his refuge here. As Goten had done in his room, they pulled up the carpet under the leg of the double bed, then pried up a couple of floorboards to make a secret panel. Vegeta wedged the binder snugly in its new cache, then they replaced the lot. They finished unpacking a few things, stocked the refrigerator and cupboards with food, and made the place look as lived in as possible, including a small pet door Goten built in for the cat.  The younger man seemed to be studying the interior, but looked a bit lost.  “Thinking of decoration already?” Vegeta asked lightly.  “Kind of,” Goten replied, not really paying attention, “Guess it should look more mature than my room. What do you like?“  “I don’t know much about it,” Vegeta answered honestly, “Whatever seems right.“  Goten chewed his lip while staring at a blank wall, feeling as though he were choking. “Maybe the view outside will be more inspiring?” “Sure.” Vegeta followed him outside to where he sat on the grass near the stream, mindlessly watching the crystalline water go by. After a long silence, Goten asked, “Do you think those little fish really like what they do, or are they just doing what they’re supposed to?“  Like Goten, Vegeta looked over the bank to watch some tiny black minnows swimming in sync. “They do seem to think alike.” He’d expected a laugh, or at least a genuine smile from the demi Saiyan, but the latter only managed a small, forced one. His initial indignation gave way to something else, and he reached over to squeeze his shoulder. A face like his should not look so forlorn. His arm closed over his chest and he pressed his lips in his hair. Goten had been finding it difficult to breathe, and he tightly balled the tail of his shirt in his fists. A lump formed in his throat, and something threatened to break loose. He unconsciously clutched Vegeta’s arm, and too late was aware of tears ready to ooze heavily down his cheeks. Quickly he wiped them away in embarassment. Vegeta seemed to understand, and said nothing. Oddly, his gesture made them harder to choke back. He could not remember the last time that had happened since his childhood, at least in anyone’s presence.  If it were me… Vegeta turned him around tight in his arms so that he could hide his face against him. “Don’t turn out like me, Goten.” Despite his urge to run to the end of nowhere, he doubted his feet would lift him off the ground. And why run, when he was exactly where he wanted to be? Sensing the need for silence, Vegeta calmingly rubbed his back. The long moment passed with no awkwardness, only tension, like a long overdue storm.  Tears streamed down Goten’s hidden face like a steady rain, leaving his speech unbroken. ”It’s all too good to be true. I’m sick of having the rug pulled out from under my feet. Every time I dare to think everything’s going well, bam, it’s gone. Like I don’t have the right to be happy.” Vegeta thought about it from the demi Saiyan’s point of view. Looking back over the turning points of his life, it could easily appear that way. “And you think that’s going to happen now?” He felt him nod grimly. “Maybe I’ll wake up to see it was all a dream. Or you’ll say, ‘Well, that was fun, but reality calls.’ And leave. Doesn’t even matter why. It’s what always happens.” Vegeta frowned. “If that’s how it was, no one would know. And I wouldn’t be moving in with you.” He hesitated in thought. “Why would I change my mind now?” “I don’t know. Maybe because I never do anything right. All I ever did was disappoint everyone.” He paused in search of words. “It’s like I can imagine what I want, but reality’s a different world that will always be like that. It’s like I only pretend to live, but inside, I’m dead. You can make me forget it, but I accepted that thought for so many years…” He was unable to speak any more past an invisible vice grip on his throat.  Vegeta nodded, understanding clearly now. “That’s kind of what I thought,” he reflected aloud. He held him in his lap, slowly stroking his hair and back. “I know what you mean. But don’t think that about me. It’s not true.” He, too, was seeking adequate words. Goten found his voice long enough to manage, “If it ends, and I have to go back home alone…” He screwed his eyes shut, not wanting to think about what he would actually go through with. “Don’t leave me, Vegeta.“  The latter winced at the pain in his voice, holding him tighter. “I won’t leave you, Goten. I promise.” Goten clutched him as tightly, daring not to speak. He was too close to breaking into sobs, which he did not want him to witness. He would just confirm himself to be weak, the feared sin of every warrior. ‘Warrior,’ he mocked himself contemptuously.          Vegeta waited for him to calm a bit before asking, “How long have you loved me?” He’d been quite vague about that. Goten paused, and drew a blank. “I’ve no idea,” he replied with a tinge of surprise, “I told you, time is relative to me.” He chewed his lip nervously. “What about you?“     “I guess I don’t know, either,” Vegeta acknowledged, “Maybe since always, it just evolved.“  “Yeah, evolved,” Goten agreed. He’d furtively dried his face, never having told a soul about that, and was now emotionally exhausted. It was a dreadful feeling, as though he’d been scraped raw inside, and numbed rather than healed.     “You see?” Vegeta pointed out, “Something that goes so far back isn’t just going to vanish.” Goten nodded, thinking about it. “Remember how the Saiyan mating ritual works? Most thought such a pair knew each other in another life, or some other world. If so, some hidden part of us still remembers. That’s a heavy burden for one life.” The demi Saiyan was considering his point, and Vegeta firmly lifted up his face. “It might take you some time to see it, but I won’t leave you. Ever.” “Me neither, Vegeta.” The piercing obsidian eyes he looked into were the ones he loved, and he could see in them that their owner was telling the truth. “You better not.” The ferocity in the latter’s voice carried a much younger undertone, and for a fleeting second, Goten swore he could see a mental image of him when he was a child, in a red cape and the royal crest emblazoned on his armor. That could explain his immediate fascination with his bangs, he thought. His strange vision developped, and he saw his own younger self take the prince’s small, gloved hands in his own. /That’s an order, grandson of Bardock./ “Who’s Bardock?” Goten asked aloud without thinking, earning a very strange look from Vegeta. “You heard that?” Vegeta demanded incredulously. “I don’t know. I thought I did,” Goten replied in confusion.  “Bardock was your grandfather,” Vegeta replied, “You look so much like your grandmother, Gine, and I see a lot of your grandfather in you.” “What were they like?” Goten asked, and listened attentively to a hesitant description of them, of their lives on what Vegeta remembered of the old planet, Frieza’s ship, then Earth. Despite his vague discourse, Goten saw diverse scenes play out in vivid detail in his mind’s eye, as clearly as watching a film. The more he heard, and especially saw, he wondered how Vegeta had kept a shred of sanity, and of how close he’d came to losing it. Especially, he saw the origin of some of his own problems that he was unable to explain. The explosion. Bardock, in all logic, should be dead, yet found himself on a strange new planet. Projected prone onto the ground, which he pounded with his fist in bitter regret of his demoralizing failure. And fury. “WHY CAN I NOT BECOME STRONGER?!” A familiar golden glow… “My dad wasn’t the first to turn Super Saiyan!” Goten interrupted suddenly, “My grandfather was. Ba–dakku,” he pronounced clumsily. Vegeta looked up sharply. “What?!“  Spontaneously, Goten grabbed his hands. “Look! I mean…” He sought some way to express what he was somehow seeing, but Vegeta had shut his eyes. Then snapped them open, staring at Goten in astonishment. “But what…?” Goten asked, confused.  “You mean you ‘saw’ all that?” Vegeta asked incredulously. When Goten nodded, he stared into space with more questions than he could articulate. “Most of it, I remember,” he explained, “But the rest, I wasn’t even there.” He stared at Goten now, realization slowly clarifying. So many visions of which he’d been ignorant. “By the way, arrange to introduce me to your son,” Frieza had almost cordially told the king. The latter assumed an angrily defensive stance, clenching his teeth. ‘I’ll be damned to hell first!’ he mentally swore.  “Calm down, I just wish to meet him,” Frieza added before taking his leave. ‘He shall be groomed by a worthier mentor,’ he thought to himself, with Vegeta-sei’s destruction long since planned. The monster truly believed he was doing the right thing, by Icejin standards of survival of the fittest; his hopes for the Saiyan prince as his right arm man were authentic, as much as his disappointment as a traitor in his eyes.  “Damn,” Goten muttered under his breath, in complete lack of words for the hellish ordeal. Aloud, he reflected, “My dad always told us life isn’t black and white. It seemed absurd coming from him, but I guess I see now.” The reason why he’d given the defeated tyrant a second chance, his vision told him.  “I saw that in him,” Vegeta remembered, “Only after many years.” He studied Goten thoughtfully. “What I told you about the mating ritual dates back to our primitive origins, like the cave people of Earth. Shared visions and telepathy develop afterward. Though, if we ourselves evolve, I suppose that can as well.“   Goten looked up, wide-eyed. “You mean, we’re…” The sudden realization made him giddy. “Bonded mates, yes.” Vegeta returned his catching smile, squeezing his hands.  Spontaneously, Goten happily enlaced who he now knew to be his mate. He would never leave him, even in death, as when one mate passed to the next world, the other automatically followed. Vegeta was simply relieved to sense that the dark cloud that had hung over Goten for so long had dissipated. “I guess it goes to show,” Goten began, playing with Vegeta’s bangs again, “You can take the Saiyan out’ da planet, but you can’t take the planet out’ the Saiyan.“  Vegeta blinked. “That’s one way to put it.” * It only took the duo another two days to finish moving into their new house, to ChiChi’s chagrin.  “I thought you were going to take your time,” she reminded them reproachfully, “I told you we can always set Gohan’s old bed back up, for when you’ll want more room.” “We tried. It… didn’t end well,” Goten told her, stifling a snicker despite a glare from Vegeta. “Then you’d better keep your word and visit often,” ChiChi demanded, adding innocently, “Especially since neither of you likes to cook.“  They exchanged a glance and quickly replied in unison, “We will.“  “Good,” she settled, “Anyway, Fluffy’s gonna miss… your cat really needs a name, besides ‘furball.’” She rolled her eyes at Vegeta. “I know, but not just any name for a royal Saiyan cat,” Goten pointed out, “And you can visit us, too, since you have a legal helicopter now.” “Maybe I shouldn’t have added my extras,” Vegeta wondered aloud. “I probably won’t need the missel launcher,” ChiChi told him, “But well done for the smoke screen.“  Vegeta looked proud, and Goten laughed at the comical image that sprang to mind.  “You seem much better now,” she observed of Goten, turning to both in a serious tone, “What happened?” “Nothing really happened,” Goten replied, “But all’s fine. Just understanding some cultural stuff I didn’t before."  ChiChi thought for a moment. "That makes sense. I’m glad you’re okay.” They both nodded, and she added, “Do I get to see your house now? I know you’ll need help decorating.” “Sure,” Goten replied cheerfully, “Just nothing breakable and no potpourri.” * After only two days of having lived in their new house, promised visits were paid by ChiChi, then Gohan with Videl and Pan, followed by Trunks with Bulla and 17. Having half expected an awkward, disapproving tension from his brother, Goten was pleasantly surprised to find that he was happily on his side, as he’d always been. "Vegeta didn’t really insult you,” Goten calmly assured Gohan, “He was just trying to make me angry.” “Huh?” Puzzled, Gohan scratched his head. He’d been doing that a lot lately. Unsurprisingly, the visit with Trunks and 17 was familiar and relaxed. “Well, are you still keeping up your new hobbies?” 17 wanted to know. “Of course,” Goten replied cheerfully, “You guys, too?” Vegeta hid his face. “If you tell a soul, I will deny it."  "Yeah,” 17 replied with a grin, “It’s addicting as hell. Isn’t it?” he asked Trunks, who also hid his face. They finished by laughing it off, while Bulla played with the kitten. "By the way, Dad,” Trunks remembered, “Mom’s been biting her nails off, thinking of ChiChi flying your custom helicopter. She doesn’t know exactly what you added, so what should I tell her?"  Whilst father and son were talking, Goten called 17 into the kitchen. "You said I could talk to you, right?"  "Of course.” 17 followed him, looking concerned.  “Oh. No, everything’s fine now,” Goten promised at his serious expression, “I can’t think of a name for our kitten. Vegeta just calls her ‘furball’, so you’re right about that. Any ideas for a Saiya-cat?” 17 blinked. “That’s your biggest issue now?” he asked doubtfully.  “Well, yeah,” Goten replied earnestly, “You’re imaginitive. What do you think?"              "Hm…” The Android gazed out the window at the edge of the stream. “I think he pets her when no one’s looking. Maybe if you familiarize him with pets and get him to name her, they’ll bond. Just give him that look of yours, and he’s right in your pocket."  "What are you talking about?” “The same one Trunks gives me.” 17 slumped with a sigh, but he brightened again. “I’ve seen you do it, and it works,” he told him with a smirk. “Hey, I’m only kidding him, not being mean.” “I know.” Goten also looked out the kitchen window, feeling proud of their view. “That just might work,” he mumbled to himself, “Okay, I’ll try it."  "Excellent choice.” 17 beamed, but turned serious again. “Are you sure that’s all you wanted to say?"  "Yes.” Recalling their conversation in his mother’s backyard, he conceded, “I know what you mean, but we had a long talk the other day. It was painful at first, but it’s okay now. For me, anyway. But for him, I’m not so sure."     17 nodded to himself. "Not surprising, since it affected you. Start with the cat, and work up to it. You know him best. Sometimes it looks like you can read each other’s minds."  Goten choked on his soft drink he was swallowing, wondering if he knew how truthful that was. "It seems like it,” he replied when he’d finished coughing, then smiled. “Will do. Thanks, Sev.” “No problemo.” Satisfied to feel useful, 17 followed him back to the living room. “…just bulletproofed, and you didn’t have time yet to add your extras,” Trunks was agreeing. As they were leaving, 17 followed Bulla’s lead and slung an arm around Goten and Vegeta to squeeze their shoulders. “Take care of each other,” he bade. A last hug for each from Bulla, and the three of them left. "The Android is acting wierd,” Vegeta commented, “What’s with him?” “He wants normal friends,” Goten explained from what he’d been told, “Even his sister acts like he doesn’t exist anymore. Not cool."  That was indeed unfair, Vegeta thought, but said nothing. His opinion of her wasn’t about to change. They watched them disappear from sight, and Goten sat next to Vegeta on the couch. The kitten automatically jumped up with them, indecisively going from lap to lap before settling on Vegeta’s.  "There’s a reason why I like animals more than most people,” Goten told him, “They’re loyal no matter what, don’t ask much, never judge you, and will be your best friend til the end.” Curiously, Vegeta watched the tiny creature roll over in his lap, purring. “Pet her.” Goten watched him place a careful hand on her back to pet and scratch her ears as Goten did. She purred louder, turning her head upside down, and amused him with her antics. “I see what you mean.” Vegeta’s tone had softened, and he looked decidedly tired, though not sleepy. “You should name her,” Goten encouraged, “My mom didn’t pick a very original name, but I’m sure you will. She’s a Saiyan princess-cat.” After a short debate, they settled on Vegeta’s suggestion, Saiy'hime, which the kitten seemed to appreciate.  Goten slid an arm around him and pulled his head to his shoulder, feeling his heart race as always when he was so close. “Tired?” “A little.” His eyes closed, putting him in a calm state that made his thoughts easier to pick up. There were no specific ones, but his genuine worry, as well as memories that had resurfaced from them both, left him a bit frazzled.      Goten held him calmingly, in a similar way as Saiy'hime resting in his lap, and felt him gradually relax. Often he watched Vegeta sleep, and as always thought, You’re with me, unclench your fists. Even in sleep you are at war. He hadn’t meant for his thought to be heard, but Vegeta opened his palms kept unconsciously closed.  Goten quietly stroked his hair while holding him, to show that he could be his senpai’s support as much as Vegeta could be his own. That was exactly what he needed at that time, and their small - well, catnap - did him more good than reinacting their entire personalized yaoi collection. Speaking for that precise moment, anyway. * Within a week, nerves were calmed, and the duo had settled into their household routine. During the week they’d stayed at the Sons’ home, they were obliged to go far from the house to train, as ChiChi had begun to nag them about not overdoing it. Now fearing that they’d become rusty, Vegeta pushed them to work harder during the first few days. Likewise, Goten was determined to prove that he hadn’t become rusty, and worked out just as hard. Satisfied with their performance, Vegeta accorded them one out of two earlier days. Puzzled at his mate’s decision, Goten smiled his understanding when the former emerged from their room with his own laptop and Goten’s binder.  Eagerly, the demi Saiyan flopped on the couch beside Vegeta, having missed their secret hobby. The later returned his mischievous smile, and opened his laptop. Saiy'hime perched curiously on the back of the couch to see what caught her masters’ attention. Vegeta was now accustomed to her, with one expected exception. He gave her chin a scratch, and Goten tossed her toy mouse, which she gladly pounced on. A few minutes later, both were absorbed in their respective text and drawing, while Goten played footsie with Vegeta. He really preferred to be sprawled on the bed, but had found his strike of inspiration. They’d agreed not to use telepathy so as to avoid spoilers. Goten paused to daydream for his next panel, sliding his hand playfully up Vegeta’s knee to mid thigh. The latter squirmed but kept typing while Goten admired the swollen bulge between his legs. Vegeta cast him a sharp, warning glare, which ironically inspired him. He glanced furtively at Goten’s notebook to see what made his pencil move faster. "Hey, no peeking!” Goten covered his drawing, and squeezed Vegeta’s knee. “Then stop that!” Vegeta warned, which only made Goten lean foreward in a peal of laughter. “No,” he challenged defiantly, but distracted him with an unfairly heated kiss. “That’s it.” Vegeta deleted a paragraph and retyped, his expression promising that this was going to be good. Suddenly they were both startled by the sound of the telephone. Being the closest, Goten picked up. “Hello?” he answered, trying to stifle his snicker. "Hey, Goten,” 17’s voice greeted on the other end, “I was wond–” He paused, and the grin could be heard in his voice. “You’re reading your own porn again, aren’t you?” “Yes.” *** ~The End~