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Finding Destiny	By : NLDCat Category: Dragon Ball Z > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1588 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Ball Z and no profit is being made from this work of fiction.

Chapter List
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Part Six: Back to Life as Normal (Bardock's POV)

"Ouch, 'Dock, I am sorry to hear about the little one."

There were times that I really thought that it was awful how much a monster this bastard was...and there were times I was glad. This was one of the times that I was glad that he cared for no one else. "I...tried...Jerich..." I try to sound pitiful enough that he would belive it.

"Hey, don't worry about it. Accidents happen. You just rest and get back on your feet, Bardock." How magnanimous of him.

I was glad once he left. "Bardock..." the medic starts.

"No," I tell him, "NO ONE is to know other than you and me."

"Not even your squad?"

"Not even my squad," I say quietly. Lying to those closest to me was not my way...but I couldn't see any help for it. If I wanted Raditz to stay alive...there had to be little to no record of his existence. It hurt...like nothing else, but it was just another price paid because of the rank I held.

"As you wish, Bardock."

I wanted to get off of bed-rest as soon as I could because I did NOT want to lay there wondering if Tora had taken in my son...or if I really SHOULD be mourning the death of my child. "Thank you," I say quietly.

"If it makes you feel any better...Tora was seen with an infant in the Elite Market."

I go still at that. "He was?"

"Mmhmm, they were talking about how it was more than time his ways got him in trouble."

Hope fills me at that. Raditz was safe...and fate willing...would have a better life than I could have managed for him here. I could endure this hell with that knowledge. "Thank you."

"I thought that might ease your heart."

I settled into the bed. My son was safe. I would heal. While not perfect, things were definitely looking up. Jerich cared nothing at all for the child so I could rest assured that he wouldn't go poking around. He was such a gullible idiot. It was apparently the only mercy the deaf divinities would allow me...so it had to be enough.

However, I am not left alone for long, surprise there. I am just surprised at who shows up. "I am surprised at you, Bardock."

"S-sire..." I say startled at the male's appearance.

"You shouldn't have left where you were."

"I...couldn't stay there, sire."

"And look what that got you."

I swallow the protest that wants to erupt. "There was no help for it. I was...too badly injured."

"Who did this to you, Bardock?"

Tora had told him something that he didn't like to hear. Great. The only problem with that was no one was going to do anything if I was honest with him. I would only make it worse on the people I was trying to protect. So I did the only thing I knew to do in a time like this; I lied. "I don't know...they took me by surprise, sire."

"Did they now?"

"Yes, sire." It was against my honor to outright lie to him but I felt I had no other choice. I put way too many people in danger if I was honest with him and Jerich wasn't dealt with personally.

I can tell he's not pleased with my answers when he leaves but he doesn't push...which I am grateful for. Part of me is wondering why I didn't just tell him the truth while the part of me that knew better understood; Jerich and his men had NEVER been caught and had the charges stick. NEVER. I don't know WHY the Elite would rather claim such a bastard rather than let justice be done...but they protected him well. Anyone would alibi him and I would look like the bad guy. If I did that to him; EVERYONE in the Third Class Quarter that he could manage to hurt WOULD be hurt. It wasn't acceptable to me. I would rather lose this fight then have anyone else pay the price.

Needless to say, I am glad when I am allowed to leave. It wasn't in me to like to be bed-ridden. I felt the loss of my son keenly but I kept myself going because I had no choice in the matter. My squad had been in and out since the whole debacle and the fact that I was lying to them now, too, told me that things had gotten way out of my control. "Hey, 'Dock," Fasha greets me softly.

"I'm fine," I tell her immediately, "I am NOT fragile."

"I know that," she replies, "But this still has to be hard on you."

"I'll get through it." It was the truth. I had no other choice. Being stuck in hell; you either gave up or you struggled through yet another day to get NO WHERE. There wasn't anything else to do.

I am not surprised that going home, I am met by Elara. "Bardock..." she starts.

"Don't," I tell her, "I don't want to hear another apology...or god help me, another accusation on my actions. I had NO choice!"

"I know that," she says quietly, "I am just...I AM sorry that you go through this at all."

"If I don't...then no one is going to get anywhere," I tell her, "So I kind of HAVE to be okay with the way things are."

"We were NEVER meant for this."

I shrug. "Tell that to the arrogant upstarts who forgot that there was an HONOR to their rank. I think they forgot that somewhere down the line."

"We don't deserve to be treated like this."

"Oh, I definitely agree with that...but the people who NEED to agree with that are too worried about what will happen if THEY open their mouths."

"Which is sadder still."

"Oh, I agree with you, Elara...but nothing will change so long as Jerich lives and breathes. That's the bottom line. Until someone kills that bastard and takes care of his idiots...NO ONE in this Quarter is going to rest easy without sacrificing more than they want to."

She gently touches my shoulder. "I wish...I wish you had refused his deal those years ago."

"Sometimes...I do to," I admit softly, "because let's face it; I HATE this...but then...I walk through the Quarter and I see who I am protecting...what my compliance is the price for...and I get through it."

"You are better than most."

"I have to be."

I am in my own residence long enough to remove my armor and scouter. I was barely here unless Jerich was on duty somewhere on Vegeta-sei which wasn't often because he tended to get his shifts covered by others. I return to his place of residence and knock. I knew that he probably already knew I was on my way...but I learned a long time ago to observe all his rules or face the consequences. He tended to use even the slightest infraction to inflict pain on others. It annoyed me at some points because if he was in enough of a mood...there was nothing that could be done to AVOID the pain. Those nights...were the ones where I regretted ever allowing this to be done to me. Those were the nights I just wanted to surrender and say to HELL with all of THIS; the nights that my strength and endurance were tested to their very limits. That I had yet to break told me that I wasn't as weak as Jerich thought. Some nights that was the only truth that I could cling to when the walls closed in on me and I was on the edge of surrender.
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Finding Destiny