A Diary of Distress

This starts out like a poem, The text which 'Fei writes in his little black book. Then a certain braided baka comes to his resce!

~ A Diary of Distress ~

Chapter one

The late summer's sun went down not all that long ago. Its rainy glow is still hovering beneath that dove sky above. That light, that comfortable shine of warmth is no longer caressing my tanned cheeks, and the never-ending waves of the early autumn's chilled air have since long left its whips of cool from my lips for somebody else's...

It's darker now though...

But yet have the queen left her lonely castle to sweep her light cloak of glimpsing diamonds on black satin over the soon sleeping world. To then await her lover's arrival...

To await a loved one, a love whom will never be close enough to embrace.

Only once has he been there by her side...

Only once has his warmth touched her cool skin.

Then they gave birth to mankind, and she was doomed to wait forever and a day for her lover. Forever, until her own sleep would ravish her.

she is rising up by every twilight, sweeping her cloak over the world and tells nothing about the inner pain she so desperately feels.

Yes...

My heart lies with you, my beautiful moon. For I too long for something I will never reach, no matter how high I climb.

Just like you...

But when you silently wait, remembering that one moment in time that his love washed over you will I scream of pain.

Of loneliness...


A heavy sigh slipped through the chilled air.
"Why?" The young boy whispered barely audible as he looked up from the thin book. "Why is it that I can't speak of what I feel? Of what seems to be all too easy to write..."

Another sigh, more frustrated then the former escaped his lips before he lay down on the soft grass under him.

It really was a wonderful night for celebrations. With the sky shifting in color like fireworks of nature and the air, just warm enough not to freeze. Like you should have around this time of the year.

The others were still in the house. Probably completely oblivious to the fact that the Chinese youth had slipped away several hours ago.

He had, even in the company of friends, never felt so at loss, so alone...

The boy rolled onto his side and started to write again.

I can feel the fear and loneliness ripping at my heart...

I know that this is a pain that I can't hold in forever...

I can feel my heart shatter slowly, and when it has..

When it shatters there will be nobody there to pick up the pieces...

He rolled unto his belly, tilting his head up for a moment. Wishing he could release his jet black hair from its strained keep. How he would have loved to feel the chilled air sipping through the long strand, whipping at his face.

Why is it, that I can trust them all with my life without any hesitation, but never enough to let them into my heart? They will not think weakly of me if I were to let them close enough to touch. I know I've seen the hurt in his eyes when I push him away...

..I..

"Hiya 'Fei!" A happy voice called from afar.

Why must it always be so damned much easier to just shut everybody out?! Push them so far away that they'll never dare to ask again?

I just...

No, I don't want to be left alone...
I don't want to BE alone...


"..'Fei?"
"..no..." The Chinese boy answered in a whisper, unaware of the other's presence.

I'll do anything to be able to sleep properly for just one fucking night!

The braided American leaned over his dark haired friend, pausing to let his warm breath brush over one ear before he whispered husky,
"Want me to make you scream in wanton when you come?"

Nothing.

A small frown appeared on Duo's face. This wasn't like his friend. The American might be a little drunk, but he knew that his friend hadn't been drinking anything. He never did!

He grinned.

"ARE YOU DEAF OR WHAoohA!" He didn't even have the time to react until he found himself thrown down onto the ground with a heavy 'thump'.

I'm dead! I'm dead! I'm dead! Echoed through his mind as he found one of Wufei's hands in a death grip on his throat, while his other hand made sure that the American underneath him was incapable to move even one inch.

It didn't even take a second for the Shenlong pilot to recognize his ally and in the next moment Duo was free and able to take a deep breath.

He blinked and looked up at his friend, sitting a handful of feet away with his legs carefully placed under him. There was a strange expression over his usually stoic features, one that the braided boy couldn't place... But then again, he might have been wrong.

He blinked again.

Yup. The alcohol had probably gotten the better half of him because there was nothing unusual about his friend's face, or posture for that matter.

"Maxwell, what the HELL do you think you were doing?!"
"What the hell I was doing?! I wasn't the one who let somebody sneak up on me!"
"I haven't let anybody sneak up on me!"
"Oh? Care to explain what just happened then?!"
"..."
"Ha! There, the silence has spoken!"
"That doesn't mean anything!"
"Maybe not. To me." The braided boy grinned. "You just wait 'til I tell Hee-chan 'bout this!"

Duo rose from the grass and was about to turn around and run back to the small safehouse when a hand pulled him back down on the ground. Once again the young American found himself with an angry Wufei on top of him, straddling his hips, pinning his arms down against the grass as far apart as he could.
"You will not-"
"You know 'fei, if I didn't know any better I'd think you're trying to tell me something!"

Wufei just stared.

"I mean, we ALWAYS end up in these positions. And some of them can really come in handy behind closed doors-"

Wufei jerked away.
"I AM NOT INTERESTED IN MALES!"
"Yeah, sure. If you say so." Duo laughed. "Come on, the party isn't over yet and there are still a hell of a lot of liquor to burn!"


To be continued. Very soon^^