Fear

Fear by class=SpellE>Shinigamiinochi

Pairings: None (1x2 in the sequel)

Warnings: Duo POV, violence.

Rating: PG-13



I felt it uncoiling in my stomach, slithering up and wrapping

itself around my heart, constriction unsympathetically. Fear.
I hadn’t felt it

in quite sometime, months actually, when Heero self-destructed. I have only
been

afraid five times in my 15 years. I hate fear, it
paralyzes you at the one

moment you cannot afford to freeze. I truly do fear fear.
I am scared of

“freezing up” when I have to be active or rather, I am scared because fear is

unstoppable, unpredictable, and no matter how strong you are, or how you
prepare

yourself for it, it effects everyone. Even Heero, though he’d never admit it.

The first time I had felt fear was when I was six and my father broke a chair

over me. He had lost control and killed my mother, claiming she was ‘weak’ and

since she had birthed me, so was I. I had not been afraid for myself, oddly

enough. I was afraid for my mom. Later, an English teacher of mine told me that

a human’s first priority is always ‘I’. What does this say about

me, then? I never prioritize me over other people. What happened that nightclass=GramE>,

you ask? I won’t bore you with the details, let’s just
say that that was the

first time I had killed, as well as the first time I had gotten truly mad. I
had

been afraid when Solo had gotten sick, when rebels had broken into the churchclass=GramE>,

when Heero self-destructed, and now, when just minutes ago, Relena
had announced

the end of the war…

Owari