Snow

Snow Part 1
by Shinigamiinochi

Rating: PG-13

Pairings: 1+2

Warnings: OOC, swearing, angst, attempted suicide (not graphic)class=GramE>, slight Relena

bashing, fluff/sap, Duo POV.

Note: There will be a lemon sequel.

Author’s Note: I found a bunch of these old fics on
the yahoo 1x2ml and decided to finally post them. Snow, along with Hot Blood
and Fear are fics that have sort of vanished. I hope
one day to find the rest of what I had written, but for now, they remain
unfinished.

It was snowing when I broke down and ran away from my life, which was slowly

falling apart and leaving me behind. But, I’m getting ahead of myself. I love

and hate snow at the same time, kind a like Heero, really. Snow is, in my

opinion, the most beautiful part of nature. Its light and shimmers as it falls.

It’s fragile and gentle, but can be violent and powerful as well. Just like us

Gundam pilots. Demo, it also reminds me of L2. Of being cold and shivering

whenever I could find a convenient place to settle. It snowed there, too. But

the snow was not a pristine white, it was not
beautiful nor gentle. The snow was

tinged brown, no doubt from the pollution, and it came down hard. When it

snowed, on the streets, if you were smart, you did not lay
down, you did not

stop to stare, you did not fall asleep. If it snowed, you kept walking. I awoke

that morning in a dream like state. It was hard to remember what had happened

the night before and when I did, I felt nauseous. I turned on the

tv. All of the stations but
one were on stand by, as expected. A near collision

with the Earth and a large battleship does not go un-noticed, naturally. Even

after sever hours of sleep I still felt exhausted. On that channel was HER, the

person I both hated and admired. In the next few days, I would grow to admire

her more and my hate would soon dwindle down to nothing. She was speaking a

bunch of pretty words about the war but two lines struck through my sleepy fogclass=GramE>.

“Peace… no more war.” No more war… it was done. The beautiful

dream was gone. I had fought my entire life for peace, thinking it would make
me

happy. But now that it had happened, I felt the desire to search for a gun, or

maybe a nice bottle of Advil. I pushed down those urges. Yes, for me the war
had

been a beautiful dream. The five of us, brothers, fighting
for one cause, our

spirits as one. Now, there would be no need for us to stay together. Not
only

that, but I had no use. I was a soldier, my only
purpose was to protect and to

kill. What good was I in a peaceful era? I didn’t even have a liable excuse to

still be here. Wufei had his passionate desire to make sure the people of these

times kept their honor and desire for peace. Quatre had sisters, WEI, and
Trowa.

Trowa had his sister, the circus, and Quatre. Heero had Relena.
Me? I had the

Sweepers and Hilde, neither of which would want me
around anymore. The fear came

instantly. I had become obsolete. Any second

now one of the others would come into my room and say those dreaded words. “I’m

leaving”. I didn’t want if to end, not like this. I stood up and walked sown
the

hall. After Heero had blown the remains of Libra to hell, Sally had escorted us

to Earth, on to an old Alliance
base that was now a hospital. She said the

government was making each of us take a psych exam to evaluate our state of

mind. Well, I was not going to stick around for that. I stopped suddenly in the

hall. Heero stood there, a mere few feet away from me.

“Duo? I was just going to go speak to you.” My heart
thudded in my

chest. It had already started, my sayonara.