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Delivery Service	By : chroniclyflaming Category: Dragon Ball Z > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 1775 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Do not own DBZ, and am making no money from this.

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- 1
Delivery Service

Oh teenage hopes arrive at your door left with you with nothing but they want some more

1 2 3 4 by Feist

Prompt: This prompt is inspired by our two favorite homicidal, pizza delivery twins.
I think it'd be great if the androids (either before or after Gero, or both) keep seeming to "innocently" bump into Krillin while "just doing their job".
Bonus points if he doesn't realize these coincidences aren't so coincidental until they show up at Roshi's Island to deliver pizza (or a singing telegram or something else).
"Really? I don't remember ordering- Wait! You guys don't deliver out here!"

The Fill:

Something wiggled at him, a mostly forgotten memory that had to be dug up and have the dust blown off of. Had he seen these two, doing this very thing? A pair of twins doing delivering work and getting pissed off at him and wanting more than just the tip he was giving them. ‘More than the tip would be nice, little buddy.’ A strange smile.

Was it all just deju vu from waking up to the android on the porch, looking for Goku? Yeah, maybe that’s all this was. Krillin took his pizza with an uneasy feeling of walking into a trap, a sensation that he knew very well.

He felt rude just closing the door. “So, you wanna come inside?” He motioned towards the entrance of his house with the box.

“No, uh, we have other houses to go to.” Juuhachigou kept glancing at him then looking away. Like she couldn’t stand to gaze upon him for long. Krillin felt like committing seppuku in the kitchen with the knife used for the pizza.

Juunanagou glared at her, furious, and made Krillin step back. They were all supposed to be on the same side now, but the dark-haired android was still a scary guy. Even in the uniform he was wearing, complete with a hat, he was intimidating. Maybe more so, since didn’t you expect pizza delivery people to be more friendly, and the contrast was bizarre. This guy could tear Krillin apart like a tissue and was now part of the working class. Probably expected a big tip from him, too.

Silence loomed and only made him feel more dry-mouthed.

Juuhachigou had no doubt refused to wear the outfit, and instead settled for jeans and a red button up shirt, sleeves rolled up and exposing delicate white wrists and forearms. That could also tear him apart like a tissue. Still, that amount of skin made him feel a little dizzy and pathetic. It was like he’d never seen a girl before. And she was acting like she wished she didn’t have to look at him.

If only Juunanagou would just snap and kill him right now. Only blow to the neck, and he’d die holding a pizza box. Died as he’d lived.

“So…”

“Uh. Oh yeah.” Awkwardly, he dug through his pockets for the money. The darker cyborg reached out and cupped his hand, squeezing. All the blood froze in Krillin’s body.

“Thanks. Is this it? All you want to give us?”

The guy was looming over him, coming closer, hellishly like what Juuhachigou had done on that highway from so long ago. Smirking not dissimilarly. Dear Kami, they had the most perfect noses. He was horribly aware of the warmth on his face and what they must have thought of that—probably thought he was a total perverted creep.

You could hear gunfire from the TV out here.

Juunanagou was still holding his hand. Sounded all at ease even though the short man’s lungs and face were on fire. Gently squeezing his hand like no one had done in quite some time. “Say, are you blushing?”

“Um. Yeah. Er.” Humiliating. His voice was even all squeaking and it was taking all his self-control not to squirm. Juunanagou’s hand was way too soft for an angry cyborg. Stroking his thumb. Weird. Very weird.

The cold blue eyes that Krillin had spent way too long focusing on were staring him from head to feet. “You like a little skinnier than normal. Stressed out? You need some relief?”

“--Boy, where’s the food!”

“Oh, that’s my Master.”

“’Master?” The taller man sounded all teasing. He’d finally taken the money to put in his pocket and pull his hands free of Krillin’s sweaty ones.

“Juunanagou.” Krillin jumped a little at the sound of her voice. She was practically baring her teeth at them. “Shouldn’t we be moving on now?”

Her twin sighed. “Sure, sure.” Flapped a hand at Krillin while his sister stomped over to their older model red car with flames painted on the side that made him laugh because of how absurd it looked. “See you later.”

“Uh. Yeah. Sure. See you around.”

This was probably the worst and best night he’d had in a long, long time.

He turned, tripping over his feet, and nearly walked into the wall. Hopefully, they hadn't seen that.

The next time he saw them, Juuhachigou was the one to hand him the pizza and loom scarily overhead for a long, uncomfortable period of time. Her hands were about an inch from his own beneath the box, grasping, while she stared deeply into his eyes and he tried not to look away, but failed at not blushing. Her blue shirt was three shades darker than her eyes.

Juunanagou stood nearby, a little too close, actually. They were nearly forcing him into the corner of Bulma’s normally spacious front porch. From inside, the pounding of the bass sounded like some animal heartbeat. Why had he agreed to grab the take-out from the delivery drivers? There was a huge stack of food in the male android’s hands. As well as a disturbing grin on his handsome face.

“You want the extra sausage, right?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Would you like it right here--?”

His sister sighed and pushed him away from Krillin. A thing that if he hadn’t already been head-over-heels for her, would have made him love her instantly. “Don’t push it, Juunana.”

“Don’t tell me what to do!”

“I will when you’re being a jackass!”

“So, um, you guys get around a lot?”

“What?” Both of the cyborgs sounded amazed.

“Well, the last time I saw you, you were working by Kame House. But now you’re out here, in Western City.”

“Oh. Oh, sure.”

Juuhachigou cleared her throat. “So, you’re here with your friends?”

“But not with anyone, right?”

“Shut up, Juunanagou!”

“Huh?” Then the craziest thing of the night, more insane than watching Vegeta try and dance with Bulma (a sight that had sent everyone running from the room), Future Trunks taking care of his much younger counterpart, Chi-Chi hugely pregnant and leaning on Piccolo for support even as they bickered over some minor thing, happened to him. Juuhachigou leaned forward and cupped one cheek, stroking the skin with her thumb.

“Still your usual self, I see. Very clean-shaven.” Was she laughing at him? He should be feeling something other than weak-kneed happiness over the physical contact, shouldn’t he? Yeah, something, something like anger. She looked a little like she was pouting down at him. Her bright head tilted a little, careful not to get any loose hair in her eyes.

How many hours spent, how many days wasted, how many lives harmed because he’d wondered what it would be like to have her touch him? She was definitely pouting, and her thumb was coming closer to his lips.

“That purple-haired guy is staring at us. I think he’s angry.”

Future Trunks was indeed gazing at them from the window, the drapes clutched in one angry fist, glaring at the androids with hatred and homicidal rage in his blue eyes. The androids waved at him, only Juuhachigou doing so in an insincere, sneering manner. Krillin wanted to weep from the loss of contact.

“Here, shrimp.” She shoved the pizza into his arms, and her brother came over to deposit the rest in the heartbroken man’s arms.

“That’ll be, well, unless you’re willing to work it off--”

“Um. I have money. But, I’d be willing to help you out.” Krillin looked up, trying to be helpful and hopeful. Time spent with Juuhachigou, any time even cleaning their (house? Apartment?) would be nice. Maybe she could see him as something other than that weird bald guy who refused to use a remote control to shut her down?

“Help out? How?” Juunanagou was looking him up and down, taking in the muscles. Wondering no doubt what chores he could put the shorter guy through.

“Krillin!” Trunks tore open the door, normally neat hair frazzled and eyes bulging from his grim face. “What are these things doing here?”

The androids rolled their eyes and strolled off, Juunanagou only pausing to grab Krillin’s money with a playful wink that confused the bald fighter. “Guess we’ll see you later, huh?” Beneath his eye, Trunks had a twinge and was a step above copying down the twin’s license plate numbers.

Besides him, Gohan was all helpfulness and spare change. Dende went to get plates and glasses with Mister Popo, and Krillin…Krillin stood there, staring at the delivery people. Juuhachigou stared blatantly back, while Juunanagou seemed keen to avoid catching his gaze. He blushed and cleared his throat, staring down at his shoes instead.

“Uh. Hi, Krillin.” A different man from the one that the short fighter had thought he’d known as well as to be expected.

His sister was giving little annoyed looks to Gohan, taking his money and barely responding to his chattering.

“You guys have to come see the baby!”

“Uh.”

“He looks exactly like my Dad!”

“Uh.”

“He’s so tiny!”

“Well, good things come in small packages.” Her voice was bland, and Krillin tried not to flinch. Was she mocking him? She made sure not to look at him when saying that.

Was she mocking his new hair? It took all his restraint not to reach up and touch the short opaque fuzz and draw more attention to it.

The darker cyborg poked Krillin in the chest. “Hey there. Hi.”

“Oh. Hi.”

“You’re looking well today. Not that you normally look excruciating. But less freaked out than normal. Speaking of which, is that creepy purple-haired guy around?”

“Oh, he’s taking a nap.”

Juunanagou paused, thinking this over. “I…see. Well, we should make this fast then—wait. Can I, you know.”

“What?”

“Touch it?”

“Touch what?” There was a horrifyingly large amount of things he could be referring to. An organ, for instance, like his liver. Just like the purple-haired man had ranted about, as he’d dragged Krillin into Capsule Corp and told him to never be left alone with ‘those two.’

“He’s getting so big too. He eats a lot.”

“Your hair. It looks all fuzzy.” Juunanagou was starting to loom overhead again. “Seriously. Can I touch it?”

“Juunanagou. We talked about this.”

“But…look at it.”

Her mouth was all set and serious. “Just keep your mouth shut.”

“Say.” Krillin broke in with. “I didn’t remember us calling your company for the pizza.”

Coolly, the blonde flipped hair out of her eyes. Looking down at him like he was beneath her notice all of a sudden. She was so moody. Not even Bulma was this bad. And yet, it was part of her charm. “It’s all exported out to the place we work.”

It sounded reasonable. But Juunanagou was staring at him like Goku looked at hotdogs, and that wouldn’t make anyone feel at ease. Why would they lie? Who knew what went on behind the serious blue eyes that were determined to stare him down? “Oh. Okay. Sure.”

Now she was glaring at him.

The other twin was straightening his collar and trying to smooth down a wrinkle in his shirt. “You look weird in a polo shirt.”

“He screams a lot!”

While Krillin watched them suspiciously, and Gohan began digging out pictures of little Goten. Her brother finally reached out and began petting his head, causing Krillin to finally snap and freak out. “Juunanagou! Get off him!”

“Ignore her.”

“Ignore him, Krillin.”

“What, it’s all soft.” The male android grabbed the sides of his head and pushed him towards Juuhachigou. “Feel.”

By the time a hungry Future Trunks wandered out, almost sniffing the air suspiciously, Piccolo finished meditating, and Dende and Mister Popo finally located the silverwear, the twins were long gone. Leaving only the many calzones, pizzas, weird complicated feelings of enjoying a pair of attractive siblings touching him, and a bad case of friction burn on Krillin’s head behind them.

The truth came pouring out, finally, in a rush of sudden epiphanies and ‘oh’s’ that resulted in a tumble in his too small bed, and Future Trunk’s, Master Roshi’s, and Oolong’s screams that echoed from the small pink house’s wooden walls.

This time, Juuhachigou had immediately begun stroking his head until he leg was nearly kicking. It took a lot of willpower to pull her soft, soft hand away. “Wait. Wait. The pizza place said they wouldn’t come out here anymore since it was too far…”

They looked at him, tongues going to poke at the inside of their mouths. Really thinking over what he’d said. She squeezed his hand a little, distantly.

Krillin’s entire back and center were cold. “You guys aren’t here to make a delivery, are you?”

“Not…I would not describe it as such.”

“More like we’re here to pick something up.”

“What? The porn?”

The two androids glanced at each other before opening the front door and peaking in. “Oh.”

“Huh. So it’s true then.”

Her brother was grinning at him. A handsome, charming thing. “No wonder you’re such a pervert.”

Of course Juunanagou had to ruin the view by opening his mouth and speaking. “I’m not a pervert! Those aren’t mine!

“But they can be your if you want them. No, no Master Roshi would be upset...”

“Where is your ‘Master,’ anyway?”

“He’s out.” Krillin stared at the pizza. “Getting dinner.”

“Ah.” Juuhachigou shoved the food into his arms, leaning close to him over the spotted boxes. “Then we’re alone then?”

It was impossible to look away from Juuhachigou’s blue eyes. “Um. Yeah.”

They practically marched him inside, then sat in his lap on the couch. Looking seriously at him, as though he were aware of some secret to life that would help them. Deep, deep into his eyes. Then scooting closer until he squirmed and blushed.

They were such odd people. Nothing at all like Trunks had said. Although, he hadn’t said much about them besides telling them that the androids were coming to kill all of them and wipe out the entire human race. He’d completely neglected mentioning anything about appearances and therefore warning and preparing Krillin for their unearthly presence that still made him trip over his words and rub his recent growth of hair in frustration over his inability to speak to them like normal people until he remembered how they’d stroked the top of his head which made him have to take a deep breath and--

Aside from being quite powerful. But they weren’t bloodthirsty evil maniacs. Just a pair of twins with really, really blue eyes who were trying to adjust to a normal life…and arguably better at it than Krillin and his own friends who mostly didn’t/couldn’t even hold down a job at all. Totally normal.

Right. It was totally normal to lean against him, the perpetually lonely girlfriendless virgin, and bat their eyes towards his face that was probably all horrified. They were very warm leaning against his shoulders.

The pizzas were getting cold, he realized.

Juuhachigou was drawing shapes on his arm. “You’ve gotten skinnier.”

“Lean,” her brother corrected, shoving up a sleeve. “He’s gotten lean.”

“Shut up.” Her hand was on his stomach. “He’s still in decent shape.”

“Despite the take-out.”

“Oh.” Krillin’s voice was strangled. “That’s mostly for Master Roshi and Oolong. I don’t tend to eat a lot of that…stuff. Um.”

It was hard to talk and breathe at the same time while they inspected him. When they pulled up his shirt, he become more than a little convinced that this was all a hallucination. Maybe he’d hit his head in the shower, and was slowly drowning? Yet, when the blonde cyborg began stroking his stomach, he couldn’t really find the urge to care.

This was better than his life had been so far. If this was all his imagination, then with enough willpower he could get them to take their pants off? Or just Juuhachigou. Yeah. Just her. Juunanagou would disappear before this whole fantasy got really weird. Weirder. Any second it would just be him and Juuhachigou, her hopefully naked, and them in his bed.

When they fought over who got to remove his pants, Krillin was willing to accept that they were in fact actually real. Okay. Weird, very weird. But nothing he couldn’t handle. Just ask them to get off (him! Off him!) and to leave. They could have the food. They could have all the porn. Clearly, it had tainted him.

Then he was pinned by Juuhachigou who decided to beat her brother to the punch and sit in his lap first, playing with his short hair and yelling at her twin. Who in turn grabbed Krillin’s head, yanked him to the side, and began smothering the shorter man with a kiss. Almost literally smothering him until the guy’s sister grabbed him back and shoved him into her chest which also cut off his oxygen flow, but that was a sacrifice that Krillin was willing to bare.

He was just getting used to the warmth and softness when he was torn away to have his neck nipped upon by Juunanagou. Juuhachigou upped the ante by unzipped and yanking down his pants. Then her own while Krillin’s eyes nearly began bleeding and he barely responded to Juunanagou’s demands to ‘grab him.’ He still couldn’t look away from the sight of her taking her shirt off, even as her brother undid his own jeans with a snarl and forced the smaller man’s numb hand around a hardening penis.

His brain went, ‘you are touching another man’s genitals.’

While his body just drooled over Juuhachigou pulling the rest of her clothes off.

‘You may be about to have sex. With a man and a woman. A pair of twins. Twin androids.’

Sex…with Juuhachigou?

‘…yes.’

Sex with Juuhachigou.

‘That’s it. You’re on your own.’

But of course his brain could never just leave him like that. It was too loyal. By the time it came back, though, it was too late. Krillin was conscious again of his actions and surroundings as he was half laying across the couch, hands on Juunanagou’s ass to hold him close, swallowing and sucking on the other man’s cock with the same noises and enthusiasm of Goku before a plate of pasta. And of course Juuhachigou doing the same to him, on her knees, her forehead nearly pressed into his navel. His pants and underwear stupidly around his ankles.

They were very, very perfectly normal perverted android twins who had a thing for short well-built (lean) fighters and a penchant of one-upping one another.

None of which bothered Krillin in the least. Even as he tried to breathe around Juunanagou’s junk shoved down his throat while letting out little hisses of appreciation for Juuhachigou’s skills. His own attempts at imitation had the darker android grabbing a handful of his hair (almost exactly the reason why Krillin had shaved it in the first place) and told him to go easy with the teeth thing.

At least they had jobs. As Chi-Chi could have attested, that was important. And a car. And were cute.

One of his hands went to cup the back of Juuhachigou’s flaxen head. His eyes were nearly rolling towards the back of his head. “Awgfod.”

“Watch the teeth!”

He had to pull away from Juunanagou to regain his baring, the hand not on Juuhachigou rolling up and down the other man’s penis. The blonde was smirking at him from between his legs, sucking on her lower lip. Staring at him and resting her head against his thigh while his fingers combed through her hair. She looked like a cat with her eyes closed peacefully. Absolutely gorgeous and not horrified by him as he’d thought when she’d told him off on Kami’s Lookout.

Her brother grabbed him and forced him back to sucking him off. All salt and pennies and burning down his throat. “Puppy.”

This was most definitely not how he’d thought his first sexual encounter would go. But ah, there were worse ways. And really, any experience with Juuhachigou was good. Well, except the ones he’d previously shared with her, what with the beating up of his friends, then nearly shutting her down with a remote, then Cell, then being thrown up by Cell and waking up to hear of his weird crush on her. That she apparently returned.

Krillin stroked down on smooth cheek with his thumb in imitation of her actions on the Capsule Corp porch. Or maybe she was just interested in outdoing her brother and sabotaging whatever he wanted? Which could have been anything, really.

Juunanagou grabbed him by the neck to kiss and shove a tongue around his mouth. Before this night, that would have been quite horrifying enough to scare him into a coma. Now he responded right back and worked a hand beneath the android’s shirt because it simply wasn’t fair that he wasn’t naked like the other two people in this room were.

For the other man’s sake, Krillin tried briefly to neatly fold the clothes but ended up somehow throwing them behind the couch and kissing the flat bare chest in front of him. The male android made the most amusing noises when a tongue lapped at his nipple, and his increasingly familiar penis was twitching again.

So was Juuhachigou’s eye as she glared up at the two men.

She was biting her lip, staring Krillin down which made him pause. “I thought you liked me.”

“I do. A lot!”

“Then get away from him!” Her eyes were a little darker when they were upset, a little flush to her pale cheeks, and it probably wasn’t good that the sight of her angry was starting to turn him on. Not a good sign at all. He moved his hands from their place on her twin’s hips.

“Ah, so, um. I shouldn’t touch him?”

“No, no, keep touching him!” Juunanagou broke in with, grabbing Krillin’s hands.

Juuhachigou slammed a fist into the floor with a resounding thud that echoed. “I saw him first.”

“You did not! Liar!”

“I kissed him first. He’s mine! I don’t even know why you’re here, you don’t even like humans.”

“Do too. You’re the one with a problem with people. Couldn’t even talk to Krillin over here.”

“Shut up. I was waiting until you weren’t there to make a move, but then you refused to back off--”

“I noticed him first! You saw me pick him out!”

“Hey. Hey.”

“WHAT?”

“Can’t we just get along?” He fought the urge to press his index fingers together, and instead tried to smile. “Share? We can all share, right?”

Now the two androids were staring at him contemptuously.

“I’m just saying! I…I dunno. Never been in this situation before.” Krillin glanced away to stare at a pile of porn in the corner, feeling a flush rising up his neck. Everything was falling apart, like normal. Like usual. He just could never say the right thing.

Juunanagou stroked his head, flicking back the short strands from his forehead. “Aw, poor Krillin.”

“All embarrassed.”

It was remarkable how quickly they could go from wrathful to affectionate. Juuhachigou was massaging his thighs and smiling at him. There seemed to be cracks in the floorboard where she’d punched the ground. Ones that he would have to explain and repair later. And her brother was sucking two fingers before sliding them into himself with a hum that Krillin guessed meant he was satisfied with their arrangement. Really moving those fingers around. In, in some more, then out a little--

“Krillin. Krillin?” Juuhachigou’s nails dug into his leg which finally drew his attention. “What are you doing?”

“Uuuh. What would you like me to be doing?”

“Mm, better. Much better.”

“Anything you want.”

When he, they, fell off the couch and into some still warm pizzas, neither of the twins seemed to care. He was literally sandwiched in-between two squirming thin nymphs and utterly unable to detach himself from either of them. Him shoved into Juuhachigou’s back every time Juunanagou forced himself in deeper which always rang a low cry from the back of his throat. Juuhachigou’s own growls were permanently implanted in his head like some perverted microchip that had him biting her shoulder and sliding a hand to where they were joined. Behind him, the dark-haired android was panting. For once, there was no arguing at all between them. This was how all the crime and pain in the world could be ended, really. Just hop into bed with a pair of androids, and he couldn’t even recall Goku’s face at the moment with all the warmth pooling in his stomach.

Juuhachigou was leading his hand to where she wanted it. And she definitely wanted it, all of it, and Juunanagou was grabbing and squeezing his ass was too much familiarity. It was strange how something so like his fantasies could be so different.

“You two. Are so. Evil.”

“What? Us?”

“Maniacal, I thought would be better.”

“Knew it. Are you two even delivery drivers?”

“Mm.” Juuhachigou glanced behind a perfect round white shoulder to stare at Krillin and make him conscious of how sweat dripped off him and flattened his hair. “Maybe?”

“Evil. Utterly evil. Ah. Pure, unadulter, unadulterated…fuck. Fuck!”

In retrospect, after the screaming stopped, maybe he shouldn’t have slammed a fist into the hardwood floors. But he did, and the noise was loud enough to make the front door come flying open, and Future Trunk’s voice was echoing through the room and cracking with righteousness. “I knew it—oh god.”

Master Roshi shrieked a little as he finally worked through what he was seeing and any possible denial.

“Heh, way to go, Kril—oh. That’s not a girl at all. AT ALL!” Then Oolong began to shriek alongside the purple-haired and older men.

His Master stopped first, sounding tired, though the short fighter couldn’t bring himself to glance fully in their direction yet. He had completely forgotten about the now-and-forever-tainted pizza smooched nearby. “Right on the food, boy?”

“Ugh. The poor food.”

“MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING! TO KRILLIN!”

“Oh, shut up, you sword-waving weirdo.”

“What do you think we’re doing. Were trying to do. Before you all ruined it.”

“Where’s that camera?”

“GET OFF HIM! Ugh. No! My EEEEYYYYYYEEEeeees!” Trunks fell against a pile of porn, hands outstretched as though suddenly blinded. Juuhachigou was already half-dressed and moving away from him, painfully, almost causing Krillin to weep. Juunanagou was still imbedded in him, fingers tapping along his side, “You know man, you need to mellow out. How about next time, you join in?”

“Is this why you kept ordering pizzas, Krillin? How long has this been going on?”

“What else has been defiled?”

“My eeeeeeeyyyyeessssss!”

“Where are your pants?”

“Oh. He’s been wanting to do this since we all met.”

“Knew it.”

“He’s a reeeaal pervert.”

So. Here was finally that trap he’d been waiting for finally springing closed.
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Delivery Service