Tsuki no Hikari

BY : setbl
Category: Dragon Ball Z > Yaoi - Male/Male
Dragon prints: 1177
Disclaimer: Dragon Ball/Z/GT/etc. characters and related materials belong to Akira Toriyama and respective owners; the rest is mine. No monetary profit is made from any portion of this fan fiction.

A/N: I am beginning this story at the point of DBGT where Piccolo—like the majestic hero he is—is about to give his life so the earth won’t ever be in danger again thanks to the Black-Star Dragon Balls. None of the drivel that happened after that point will commence in this story. Do eventually expect yaoi, yuri, moresomes and yes even straight couples and their antics throughout as each character’s current situation and feelings are elaborated upon through story progression; though I will do my best to more professionally expound upon each character’s feelings as a person. Though this story is most certainly more dedicated to Piccolo and Gohan—the one couple in the whole series that would have made just as much if not more sense in canon than Bulma and Vegeta (Piccolo as a hermaphrodite could have even given Gohan children) but never happened because there are more small minds in the world than ever before, still persistent in messing up the way it could be, no doubt still limiting what is allowed to be mainstream media. Indeed Toriyama Sensei even had to redraw quite a few characters in the original manga because they weren’t “accepted” as he initially drew them >.< . . .

FYI, I will keep working on each of my stories when I can and as I feel up to it, as my health hasn’t been the best do to circumstances beyond my control; updating when I have a full chapter complete in which ever one I happen to be working on at the time. I’m not going to stress it or anything else in life anymore; for life is too precious to waste and like too many, I’ve been through far more hell than I could ever possibly deserve during my short time on Earth thus far. I’ve given a lot, fiction and otherwise for free throughout my life without much acknowledgement or appreciation; for it’s in my spirit to give and share the good things in life. For those of you that have continued to support me and the positive elements and energies in the Universe by being genuinely decent worthwhile individuals, never joining the ranks of cowardly evils that are still allowed to be here on Earth, no matter how much pressure and terror is put on you; you are sincerely appreciated, there being no words alone that could thank you enough, but please know that I really do. For all you decidedly lesser minds out there in the world that keep wasting your every energy into continuing to make the world an evil, cowardly, unfair, unequal, lousy, terrible, heinously polluted and verily crumbling fucked-up place; deep down you know exactly where and how you deserve to be. And don’t kid yourselves about being “untouchable”; everything in the Universe eventually comes back around, one way or another. And I can tell you firsthand, it is always better for a soul to ascend cowardice, warped conditioning and faulty thinking and destructive traditions of ignorance that perpetuate misery, inequality and undue suffering, and even their own past, to do what is truly right and worthwhile for all; ascending hate, greed, fear, destruction and cowardice to become love, peace, hope, healing, wonder and wonderful in all that you think, breathe and do. All, grow up spiritually and find the courage to be LOVE in the world today and on. Only then will true change be at hand; otherwise, the world will continue crumbling in vain on its current unnecessary destructive path.     

 



Tsuki no Hikari



Prologue

He was far more proud of, observant and adoring of him than even his own father or mother, so of course his last words went out to his dearest student and friend. A far-too-short farewell began to the only person in the universe he had cared for so much that his chest swelled when he thought of him sometimes. Though, as thoroughly trained of a warrior he was; it plagued his person significantly, that as he felt his body begin to agonizingly sear and sizzle as the world around him commenced its own violent self-destruction, his chest began to tighten for an entirely different reason than that which surrounded him. And as Earth took her final bow, Piccolo uttered out one last sentence with all that was in him, yelling the last part at the top of his lungs: “Be well... Gohan~!” in excruciating agony so immense, his consciousness abruptly faded to black.

Gohan looked up at the earth from New Wakkusei Tsufuru in devastating incredulousness; falling to his knees at the earth’s explosion, screaming the name that had been indelibly carved into his heart, his very soul for so seemingly long as tears streamed down his face, unsure if he would ever be able to breathe again.



ONE

It had been years since the earth had been restored again and its inhabitants returned—the Tenkaichi Budokai had come and gone a couple times—but Gohan continued on only as a drone. His face maintained its monotone; only showing false smiles when expected to. Though he kept up his duties as a well-known scholar, husband, brother and father; he was merely going through the motions. He couldn’t taste things anymore. Most moments, he did not understand why his lungs were so determined to breath, why his heart had to keep up its incessant beating, why… Why had Piccolo had to die!? There should have been a better solution, shouldn’t there? If only…

“Gohan.”

“Hm?” he answered absently.

“I can’t take watching you like this anymore. Do whatever it is you must do to bring life back into yourself, but don’t you dare just stay here and die like this, trying to suit everyone else. I won’t forgive you if you do any longer,” proclaimed Videl adamantly, tears already streaming down her wearied face.

Gohan swiftly turned around from his books then, his dark-circled eyes widening once they took in her full sorrowful but determined appearance. “Videl I…”

“I knew when you married me that you did love me but that something was off. But I figured whatever it was we could work it out because I loved you more than I had anyone in life,” she whispered, her voice trembling.

“Oh, Videl I-” Gohan got up and tried to embrace his wife of many years, but she lightly pushed him away.

“After we married we were happy. I believed for a while that I was number one in your heart. It was wonderful. Everything was fairytale-fine… or at least I believed so… until he died…. You know you haven’t stopped whimpering his name out the rare times you do sleep? The first two years after his death, I thought I understood. He was your dear friend, comrade and beloved shishou. But it’s been six years now and the times you’ve slipped and called out his name during the rare moments we do have sex—sex, because we certainly don’t make love anymore—the way you keep fulfilling your duties only for duty’s sake; enough is enough! If he means that much to you, go to Other World and tell him how you really feel. You owe us both that much!” she urged adamantly, shoving his hand away when he attempted to touch her in comfort and apology.

“I will always love you Son Gohan. You taught me fly, saved my life, opened me up to worlds I would have never believed possible otherwise and have given me a strong and beautiful daughter, along with some happy years of marriage…. I am most grateful for having met you. My love for you will never die. So I refuse to keep watching you waste away so pathetically, so dishonorably. Get up off your ass now and go tell him the truth. I know you know your father’s teleporting technique. Hell, wish him back to life with New Nameksei’s Dragon Balls so you can tell him properly and receive a legitimate answer. I can take care of things here. Only if you wait a moment longer will I never forgive you, Son Gohan,” she concluded stout-heartedly, folding her arms firmly in her long-sleeved rose-hued gown, her vivid sapphire eyes shimmering with emotion.

“V-Videl… I’m so-”

“What did I say? If you come back here, it had better be with him. Now go!”

Videl broke down then in sobs when Gohan enveloped her in his powerful arms. “Videl I’m so…” There was so much he wanted to say to her, but he just couldn’t seem to get the words out right; persistent tears streaming down his own face at the thought of having caused her any pain.

Videl shoved him away once again, though with more force. “Get out of here already…. You know, that is the one quality of your father’s that I wish you had—the courage to follow your whole heart no matter where it might lead you.” Moving closer to him, she gave him a chaste kiss to silence him; holding on for a few tender moments as tears from years built up still streamed down both their faces before forcefully pulling away and stepping out of the room.

Gohan stood staring straight ahead, unmoving and unseeing for a long moment before making a resolute decision. She was so right, and he had been so wrong to make her suffer with him for so long. Yes, he was going to wish Piccolo back to life and tell him everything, regardless of the consequences.

****

“What do you mean, ‘He hasn’t died,’?! Where in the hell has he been, and why didn’t you say anything?!” blurted Gohan quite flustered, already so emotionally wrung.

“That I cannot tell you my boy; for I cannot sense him. I only know he has not passed through Other World, has not yet perished, so he must be somewhere on the temporal plane,” finished North Kaio quite agitated himself. Could he get no respect from that family?!

“Thank you for your help Kaio-sama. I am sorry to have bothered you.” Gohan didn’t let him answer, quickly closing his end of the telepathic link, his nerves rattled as he continued to fly over the earth, blindly searching for whom he could not sense desperately.

****

Where are you Piccolo? How did you survive Earth’s destruction? You wouldn’t be hiding from me, would you? D-do you know… how… I…? And if you do, do I sicken you? Is that why you stayed away? I-is that why…?

His vision bleared then with hot tears as mounting anguish wrought his heart in incomprehensible despair. Genkai da! He wanted to die! There was no more reason to breathe!

Finally, having reached his limit, Gohan made the decision that had been festering within him since Piccolo’s loss. Flying up as fast as he could—the fierce pressure squelching all physical tears away—he flew up until he was past the atmosphere, peering down at the earth from space and then… he let go.

All the pain, all the anguish, all the hurt, all the lament, all the self-loathe, cowardice, disgust, shame, fear, yearning and despair tsunamied within him; violently crashing upon and engulfing the filaments of his very soul and sanity. And he fell—or rather, Earth’s gravity took hold of him as it would any other object within its orbit without resistance from another force.

He did not weep as he felt his body excruciatingly endure the fluctuating extremes of scalding and frigid from reentry into the atmosphere. And though his cells did scream under the intense pressure from extreme velocity and temperature, not a sound escaped his lips. He hadn’t even hit the earth yet and found in this inscrutably lengthened descent that he finally felt a bit of solace, some semblance of peace; even if he had relinquished hope. Though, that smidgen of serenity precipitously crashed as his body hit the surface of a grand body of water so hard, for a moment even obvious pain was absent and he believed he had succeeded in entering another dimension without trying to.

But as his body finally began to sink into the deep majestic blue, he felt that little hint of tranquility tickle his psyche once more; his arms would have reached out if they could, to embrace and fully accept the all-encompassing darkness that brought slight peace.

****

When Gohan finally awoke, he was sure he was either still alive or in literal Hell; the all-body pain almost viscous in its soreness and extensive throbbing. He should have known. Even though he’d abandoned his martial arts training years ago and let all his defenses down, he was still demi-Saiyajin; the fall that would have decimated most other living beings on Earth merely left him heavily bruised and with some broken bones. Huh. Of course, he couldn’t even do that right….

But thoughts came to an abrupt halt when his eyes lay on a face he hadn’t had the privilege of in years; tears immediately welled up in them without his say. But as he attempted to sit up; pain shot throughout his body and up his spine, forcing him back into his previous supine position.

“Careful now Sir. You have sustained some serious injuries. While I have done my best to give you proper medical attention, it would be unwise to move just yet,” informed the very familiar voice, though it contained a much softer quality than Gohan remembered.

Gohan peered at him hard then; absolutely astonished when his savior turned away, actual sorrow and chagrin in his eyes. What came out of his mouth next truly floored Gohan.

“I know I’m not the greatest thing to look at, but it isn’t right to stare, you know?”

Gohan’s eyes widened then so much they hurt. What on Earth was Piccolo talking about? Was he joking? No, he didn’t seem to be joking, and that made Gohan’s chest feel really tight…. He no longer knew him! What on Earth had happened to make such a thing possible?! His only solace then was that it half explained why Piccolo could be around without telling him. It did not, however, explicate why even though they were in the same cavern, he could not sense Piccolo’s presence at all. Even if cloaked or lowered, he should have an inkling that he was there. If he wasn’t gazing at him, he wouldn’t believe he was there at all. He would have thought he was hallucinating if the pain in those wondrously amazing familiar obsidian eyes wasn’t so real before he’d averted them. Though, it hurt beyond words that his shishou no longer knew him; it also opened the door to otherwise impossible possibilities. Hope began to glint in Gohan’s eyes then; all he had to do was be patient and have courage.

“It’s not that. I actually think you’re quite beautiful. You just remind me of someone I lost years ago, and it struck my heart. Please forgive me for staring,” spoke Gohan softly.

Piccolo’s face swiftly turned to peer at him again then; his eyes scrutinizing as well as imploring. “There are others like me?” he quickly asked, unable to hold himself back, his enthusiastic inquisitiveness somehow like that of a child’s.

“Indeed. Your people are from another planet; that’s why you haven’t found anyone like you here.” Gohan decided then to leave Dende and such out of it; even ready to endure the tediousness and pain of having to heal up in real-time.

“I am? Where? What am I? Who am I?” the amnesic Namekseijin spurted in a flurry of words very uncharacteristic of his past self.

“I cannot answer the ‘who’ part. But I can tell you are a Namekseijin, originally from Nameksei. Your people are extraordinary, gifted and peaceful; a wondrous people indeed,” answered Gohan sincerely, striving to wipe the tears that had trickled down his own cheeks with the one arm that wasn’t broken.

The amnesic Namekseijin sat down then; it being a lot for his new personality to take in. But he felt a lot better knowing that he was a ‘visitor’ instead of the monster he had begun believing he was. He did something then that stole Gohan’s breath away—he smiled a genuine full-on smile where his eyes closed, which had never been seen on his face before. Gohan couldn’t help but smile too.

Once the amnesic Namekseijin had opened his eyes once more and peered at Gohan intently, he swiftly turned back around blushing. The strange tailed man made his knees weak when he saw him smile and he didn’t know just why. But knowing he had to help him until he was healthy again, he made himself buck up and turn back to address his injured guest.

“I have been calling myself ‘Long’. I don’t know if that is my real name, but I haven’t seemed opposed to it, so you may call me that. May I have your name Sir?”

Gohan’s eyes widened once again. Hmm. So, Long (Dragon) was something he remembered. Interesting. And, though simple it did fit him. If there was any being more immaculate and majestic, Gohan hadn’t known of it. He made up his mind then. He would stay with Piccolo (Long) until his memories returned; aiding him in any way he could. Once he was sure he could handle it, he was himself again; he would tell him how he really felt about him, finally ready to accept any and all consequences that may result. For, his love for him would surely never die.

“I am called Son Gohan, first son of Son Goku and Chichi, grandson to Gyumao. It’s a pleasure to meet you Long.” He had elaborated some not to be pompous but to see if any of it would trigger anything within Piccolo, but it didn’t. Long merely smiled at him and answered with an uncharacteristically pleasant greeting too.

For a few moments after, there was silence as the both of them contemplated to themselves. But eventually Long became somewhat fidgety and spoke up once more. “It’s none of my business, but I was wondering; just how did you get yourself so banged up? You seem like such a kind and intelligent person. How did you find yourself in such a situation that would leave your body broken and left to drown?” Long asked truly wondering, his eyes open with newfound openness and inquisitiveness that Gohan had never witnessed from him before.

Gohan yearned then more than ever to reach out and hold that immaculate emerald face firmly, to passionately lock his lips with his own, but he knew better. Not only did Piccolo not know how he felt for him, he no longer even remembered him or himself at all. So, he knew he had to tread with care; hoping with all he was that things would eventually work themselves out.

Striving to pull himself together, Gohan finally attempted to answer him the best he could without absolutely lying. “I got into an agonizing fight with a guy that was at the end of his rope. I lost, but I take hope in the fact that he might have found his salvation,” he answered fervently, much truth in his words.

Long looked at him thoughtfully then before getting up and moving further into the homey candle-lit cavern. When he came back, he was carrying two wooden bowls, one large one medium; both having steam scented of diverse herbs rise out of them. Long gazed at him reluctantly a moment before speaking. “Um… this is tea made from healing herbs I’ve gathered around here. And uh,” He paused a moment, his face blushing then as he looked at the larger bowl, “I’ve been keeping you and your wounds clean. You’ve been out for days,” he informed embarrassedly, his cheeks quite flushed.

Gohan had to grin; he had never seen Piccolo so… But then he noticed something he had failed to up to that point, except for the tight bandages and splints wrapping wounds and broken bones, he was naked underneath the covers of the lovely indigo futon; his face becoming quite flush at the realization.

“I-I’m so glad you finally woke up today. There are not people around here to go to for help and I can’t go out during the day.”

This piqued Gohan’s curiosity immediately. “Why can’t you go out during the day?” he asked without thinking.

Long peered down then as if ashamed. “Direct sunlight burns me. My body regenerates once I am in darkness again, but it’s quite painful. That’s another part of why I had thought I must be some kind of monster. But you said I am an alien, so it must just be an attribute of my kind, I guess.”            

Gohan did his best to keep his face unreadable. No, that is certainly not a common trait among Nameks. In fact, he could recall the rare precious times when Piccolo would allow him to see him unguarded; basking in the sun with an ever slight but utsukushii smile tugging a corner of his mouth. And… Even his breath stopped when shimmering obsidian peered imploringly into his own. He knew Pi- Long was awaiting his answer, desperately needing his reassurance. Gohan found he could not hold back then. Though both his legs and his right arm were broken, his left arm was alright; him wrapping it around Long’s neck awkwardly in comfort, pulling tighter when he tried to move away.

“You are not a monster. Do not ever allow anyone to convince you of otherwise. There are plenty of foolish small-minded people on this planet Earth, but don’t you ever listen to any of them; they don’t know there asses from their elbows,” declared Gohan passionately, his one able hand stroking the back of Long’s head affectionately.

Long nodded his head before pulling away and clearing his throat. “Your back luckily wasn’t broken, but most of your body has been severely bruised. I could clean you up again or just leave this warm herbal water and cloth for you and go to a different section of the cave until you call me. Are you strong enough to do it yourself?”

While a huge part of Gohan swelled at the idea of Long (Piccolo) playing nurse for him, he thought better of it. “I’ll do it, thank you Long. I’ll call you when I’m through.” Long nodded and quickly stood; journeying to some other section deeper within the cavern for a while.

****

By the time Gohan had finished thoroughly cleaning himself with his one useable arm he was more exhausted, sore and hungry than he could ever remember feeling in his entire life, easily gulping down the bowl of tea. But Long seemed to know when he was finished, asking permission to enter that particular chamber of the cavern once more, only doing so once he was given such.

After he cleaned up the two bowls; Long returned to Gohan’s side expectantly. “Are you hungry? I have plenty of dried meats and can make you more tea if you like.”

Again Gohan was astounded, striving with difficulty to keep his face neutral. Piccolo—like all Namekseijin—subsisted basically on water. He had seen him drink tea and thin soups before but never witnessed him ingest more than that. And though he knew they could eat if they wanted, it was certainly out of character for Piccolo to do something unnecessary. What on Earth had happened to him? He wanted answers so badly his jaw hurt from all the tensing. But he knew he had to stay cool for both their sakes, taking a breath before answering. “I would like that very much Long, thank you,” he answered, watching intently as Long quickly left the room again to procure said items.

Though, the one thing Gohan did like about this Piccolo was that he smiled for real so freely; part of him wondered whether he ought to recall his past self. And then he felt bad for it, knowing he had no right to even think such a thing; also longing to know if he had ever had feelings for him beyond friendship, being comrades and student and teacher, and feeling bad for never having made him smile for real before…. No doubt about it, he had to help him get his memories back, one way or another and soon.

****

Long observed Gohan intently as he ravenously ate strip after strip of dried meat; a strange smile coming to his face.

Why. Why does he seem so familiar to me? He’s only been awake some hours, but I feel as if I’ve known him for years. His scent, the sound of his voice, his pale beige skin and deep pain-filled obsidian eyes—it’s all so familiar and I find myself yearning to wrap him in my arms and make it all alright. Why is there such sorrow in him? I can feel that he is a good person, so why and whom has made him suffer so? Can I help him? Will he let me? I can only hope and keep trying….

Once he had consumed a good portion of dubious jerked meat, Gohan’s eyes looked up again as he licked his lips; his breath catching as serious piercing obsidian orbs peered fervently, sympathetically into his own. He wasn’t sure what to say; only certain that he had never seen Piccolo look at him quite like that before. If Long was really feeling sorry for him, he could not take it! Tears immediately began forming in his eyes without his say. Why couldn’t he ever be…?

Long moved over to him then without thinking; carefully wrapping him in a tender embrace, causing the bough to break, everything painfully crashing down. Gohan’s body shuddered pitifully in Long’s arms; shame coating his person that he was breaking down in front of the one person he had most revered throughout his entire life. Though, he was certain; if Long let go of him then, it would be even worse, his one workable arm slinking around and hugging his majestic person the best he could, his tail squirming from under him and flicking in angst.              

I love you so much Piccolo! I know your true soul is still here, but can’t you remember anything?! You just don’t know how much it’s killing me that you don’t know me. I need-

Gohan’s breath suddenly caught in his throat then; the feel of immaculate emerald lips gently pressing against the side his jugular momentarily stealing all viable thought.    

Arigatou gozaimasu to all who R&R! Until The Next. . .         




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