rate_review Reviews

email me and let me know when another chapter is up. I was disappointed to see it wasn't finished. I was really into it.

This was cute ^^ I agree that it may not take too long for the two to delve into romance since they do know each other well and there's attraction on both sides, if not at least curiosity. And Bura (or Bra?) is adorable!

YAY!!! Let me first start off by telling you I really enjoyed what you've written so far and am sooooo looking forward for more! ^_^
I love the whole training camp thing...hehe it's funny. I really love how you take Vegeta's "humor" into account, and it's great! And although I've never really read or even thought about reading gohan/piccolo stuff, I'm interested to see how this is all going to work out. I also love that you're making Gohan go through divorce and isn't just like, "hey, I love you!" while still being married. XD
And even though you said that ch. 5 wasn't what you thought was good, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. I loved the innocence/not innocence of the kiss and I soooo wanted you to write more!!! :)
However, one suggestion I would make is to go back through and re-read your stuff. It's really good, don't get me wrong, but some of your sentances aren't formed right and it makes deciphering them a little difficult. It's not on many sentances, but just a few. And that would be my advice to you. so take it or not, :)
Anywho, you're doing a GREAT job, keep working on it and update, update, update!!!! I want to read more, I'm so excited!
albino

This is such a cute story ^^ I'm reviewing all 4 chapters here btw--And I love how Vegeta and Trunks keep having awkward moments. Goten I'm not really that familiar with, but from what I've seen, I liked how he snaps at Gohan. He usually is just a tag-a-long to Trunks and, you're right, he is kind of reserved. I think it also showed how frustrated he is with his "girlfriend" and pretending he's straight. And I hope that new pairing is what I think it is--I'm guessing Piccolo and Gohan and maybe that's the reason for the divorce? Also, I'm wondering what Goku and Vegeta's reactions will be if they figure out what's going on, so kinda looking forward to that ^_^

Well, you have Goten and Trunks's relationship down fairly well, I think, but I can't say as much for Vegeta. Yes, he's a gruff, rough bastard, but not THIS bad, especially to his son. I do look forward to seeing the relationship between the demi-Saiyans develop.