Adult-FanFiction.org : Gundam, Beyblade, DBZ, FMA

A Little Light of Love	By : squallstorm Category: Fullmetal Alchemist > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 7987 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 22
- 23
- 24
Disclaimer:� I do NOT own
Fullmetal Alchemist or its characters.....I'm just playing with them.

Author's note:

Thanks to ZaKai!�

I will offer you no excuses for the lateness of this chapter.� I will only say that Real Life has come for a
lengthy visit and doesn�t seem to want to leave��

Chapter 23

�Alphonse, I'm worried,� Noa murmured quietly.� Al let his head fall to the side to look at
the woman seated in the chair pulled close to his bed.�

Ever since waking to find her here, he'd been slightly uneasy.� She was holding his hand, stoking her thumb
over the top of his knuckles in a seemingly absent gesture of comfort and every
once and a while she would reach out and run her soft, warm hand though his
hair.� Normally he'd be very happy to be
on the receiving end of these displays, but for some reason they were making
him uncomfortable.� He wasn't about to
stop them, he just didn't know how to accept them or return the sentiment.� He couldn't do much at the moment, but lay
here.��

�Ed can take care of himself,� Al whispered back, giving
Noa's hand a weak squeeze; the extent of what he could do right now.� �Plus he's with Roy.�
What could go wrong?��

Noa had told him about the letter from their patron, Fritz
Lang, immediately erasing all his doubts about the captain.� Not like he wanted to believe the things that
came out of the Seniore's mouth; he felt bad that he had ever doubted in the
first place.� It also helped to know he
hadn�t lost his abililty to judge people.�
He had been shaken by how often he had misjudged people during this
trip.� Macy, Lady Rose�it shook him to
his very core that he could have been so blind, so easy to trust those nasty
people.� ��

Al�s gaze dropped to their clasped hands, his mind turning towards� Ed and the fact that he liked men.� When he really thought about it, it
was no surprise that Ed liked men over women.�
Most women here were too frozen in their mindsets; too caught up with
the mother/good wife role and wouldn�t have a mind sharp enough to satisfy Ed's
intellect.� The signs were always there,
it was just that�he didn�t think to look for them.� ��

But if this world's Roy
was anything like theirs, then it was no wonder that Ed was attracted to him.� He looked the same, of course, to their
version back home, but this Roy
was younger�softer then the man they grew up around.� He didn�t bait Ed into fits of anger (at
least not yet.� He could almost picture
what it would be like once they got to know each other better).� From what he�d seen of the man so far, he was
able to hold his own when faced with Ed�s anger, his quirks, and his foul
mouth.� Only time would tell if anything
became of them and though he was a little concerned that Ed might be confusing
the two, hoping for a replacement for the general, he was sure that somewhere
in there, Ed was working to sort that out.

That didn't mean that he wasn't a little bit shocked to hear
those words fall from his brother's lips upon waking.� He'd meant what he said, but when he thought
about it, Al wondered how two men actually showed they liked one another...that
way�sexually.� He wasn't sure that if he
asked, Ed would answer.� He could almost
picture the embarresed stuttering and how red Ed would get if he ever worked up
the courage to ask.� �

If anyone deserved happiness, it was Ed.� He just hoped that the captain knew what a
great person Ed was, and to treat him with the care he deserved.� When he was well�sooner if he could seize the
opportunity�he was going to have a talk with the captain, the 'big brother'
talk that Ed would always do to him when they traipsed all over the countryside
looking for clues to the philosopher's stone.

�But what if something happened to Roy?�
He told me that he wasn't supposed to be out of bed yet,� said Noa into
the brooding silence, looking at the door.�
Al let his head roll over to look at the closed door as well, seeing
nothing of consequence.�

Al turned back to look at the woman, his attention being
diverted by the way the lamp light warmed her rich brown hair into burnished
cooper tones.� It was really interesting
that brown hair could have such reddish hues to it.� �He's in a hospital,� said Al distractedly,
his eyes tracing where his fingers wanted to go.� �I'm sure they're fine and just off somewhere
talking,� murmured Al, his eyelids drooping.�
It was neat the way the highlights made Noa's skin look more
surreal.� He felt that somehow, he was
more connected with Noa then ever before and he wondered at that.� Maybe a near death experience changed the way
a person viewed things.

�I had a dream about you,� Al said suddenly, surprising
himself.� He hadn't meant to give voice to
that feeling.

�Did you?� What
about?� she asked interestedly.�

�Hm, well...�� Al
struggled for a way to tell her about the impressions he had while sleeping,
but it defied explanation.� It wasn't as
if she was there specifically, but he was sure it was her that he'd dreamt
about all the same.� It was just a
feeling.� As if she had been with him
while he was down in the main chamber of the underground complex.

Uncalled for, the memory of Isabella's death suddenly came
to the forefront of his thoughts.� He
blinked rapidly, turning his head away to look at the door.� It was not like he didn't want to think about
her, but...� He couldn't.� the memory came anyway, despite his struggle
to push it away.�

By the time he had gotten to the boulder, there was little
hope that he'd find the small girl alive.�
As he rounded the large chunk of rock, a large splattering of blood made
the dark floor slick.� As if someone had
squished a fat, juicy grape and this was the result.� The comparison made Al want to laugh
morbidly, but he choked it back.� All he was
able to see was a small hand�no!� He
couldn't think about that now.� His grip
on his emotions was tenuous at best, but somehow he forced his head back to
look at Noa and her worried expression.

He had yet to answer her question about his dream.� Closing his eyes with an anguished frown and
a heavy sigh, he just concentrated on evening out his shaky breathing.�

�Al, what's wrong?� asked Noa.� Al felt her dry, warm hand brush through his
hair to rest on his temple affectionately.

�Don't you already know?� asked Al, his eyes fluttering open
to meet her earth brown eyes.� �Can't you
tell?�� How on earth could he even begin
to talk about what he'd seen with her.�
It was better that she sensed it.�
He didn't want to ever have to say out loud what he'd seen.

�No,� said Noa sadly, looking down at their clasped
hands.� �I can't tell.� Not anymore.�

�Huh?� Why!� What happened?� said Al, gripping her
hand.� What had happened since he was
brought here?� Ed hadn't said
anything�well, he admittedly was asleep at the time, but...� �Tell me!�
What did I miss,� demanded Al, shifting his body across the small
mattress with every intent to sit up, but only gasped at the way his abdomen
protested.

�Shh, shh.� It wasn't
like that,� said Noa, letting go of his hand to readjust the pillows.�

Al looked up as Noa bent over him, her hair falling forward
and down into his face.� It had gotten so
long.� He hadn't really noticed before
just how long it had gotten.� Noa,
reached one hand under his neck, gently lifting his head.� Al reached up his hand and caught a handful
of hair, rubbing it between his fingers.

The lamp light didn't reflect very well off the hair in his
hand, so Al moved it, watching as the deep brown strands turned red in his
hands.� Two hands covered his, drawing
his eyes up to hers.�

�It seems I've done something rather strange again,� said
Noa as their eyes met.� Al blinked in
confusion.� �I...I had touched Edward,
saw what he saw...for Isabella...�� Noa
blinked rapidly several times in succession, clearing away the sudden moistness
there, before she resumed her seat, her face softening as she studied him.� Al felt his insides go cold and his chest
squeeze painfully.

With his hand still held by both of hers, Noa looked to the
side.� �I was outside the tent crying,
when they brought you out to take to the city.�
I...I saw inside your mind, Alphonse.�
You were dying, and somehow I convinced you to stay by touching the
essence of your mind.� Ever since then,
whenever I touch you, I can't sense anything.�

�How about other people?� murmured Al, looking down the bed
at their hands.� He was trying not to
think, not to brood on the death of the small girl.� As far as he pushed it away, it was still
very close.�

�It still works for them,� confirmed Noa, looking back at
him.

�Is it because of what you did?� wondered Al.� �That you can no longer read me?�

�No...yes, maybe.�� Noa
let go of his hand, crossing over to the window.� She folded her arms under her breasts,
keeping her back to him for a moment, then she turned.� �I can't because...because when I almost lost
you...I...�� Noa faltered.� She uncrossed her arms and began to worry her
hands, pulling on her long nails, threading her fingers and rubbing her
knuckles.� And she wouldn't meet his
puzzled stare.�

�Noa?� asked Al, watching her as she avoided his searching
eye.� Al frowned to himself, wondering at
her strange behavior.� Sometimes he
didn't know how to talk to her.� She knew
Ed and himself so well, that most of the time he didn't really need to interact
with her.� She just knew.

But now, he found himself considering her in a way that he
never had before.� Her behavior was the
most puzzling thing about her right now.�
Never could he recall her acting so perturbed.� She glanced at him, her eyes widening as she
saw him watching her.� Then she
blushed.� Al blinked in bewilderment.

Noa was so steadfast in her stoicism that these displays of
emotion were fascinating to watch.� It
was rare for her to act so open unless under duress.� This seemed to have something to do with him,
he just couldn't figure out what that might be.

Al reached out his hand towards the woman.� Already he mourned the loss of her
touch.� His fingers felt cold.� �Noa?�
Won't you tell me?� said Al when she didn't seem to notice his gesture.

She looked at him contemplatively for a moment before
smiling then closing her eyes.� With a
sigh, she looked at him.� Al tilted his
head at her, wondering at the unfamiliar look in her eyes.��

�My nana warned me it would happen like this,� said Noa, her
gaze locked on his puzzled face.�
�Alphonse...Al...What do you feel for me?�

�Huh?� asked Al intelligently, raising his eyebrows.�

Noa pressed her lips, trying to stop herself from
smiling.� She resumed her seat at his
bedside and took his outstretched hand in hers, bending it at his elbow so that
the back of his hand rested on her chin.�
Al could only blink at her, thoroughly confused now by her actions.

�Al...before this all happened�you getting shot�I sensed
that you might have...feelings for me?� asked Noa.� She looked at him quickly, then dropped her
gaze to the mattress.� �I...I
have...� It seemed like... �I am in...�

Like a dolt, Al finally caught on to what Noa was saying;
everything clicked into place at once.�
He gave her hand a squeeze, cutting off her stammered confession and
drawing her eyes up to his face..�

�Noa?� Are you saying
what I think you're saying?� asked Al breathlessly.� Noa looked into his eyes, that same unknown
look making her eyes gleam and nodded.�
�Holy shit,� cursed Al, totally floored.�
�You do?� Wow...�� He blinked several times in rapid
succession.� �I mean...�� He mentally shook himself out of his
amazement.� He needed to respond but...

He had always sort of taken Noa for granted.� She had been there from the beginning of his
time on this side of the gate.� She had
been his guide to learning about the differences of this world over his, since
Ed didn't really want to help him too much.�
Now, though, he had to decide if there would ever be more between them,
as Noa was quite clearly waiting for him to say something to her.

Yeah, he did like her�liked to be around her...but...there
was something holding him back.� He
wasn't sure if he wanted to put her in a position where she would be further
ostracized by being with him.�

And he still didn't give her an answer...��

0-0-0-0-�

As Ed worked on his binding, Roy could hear the Seniore moving and yelling
at the two other men.� What he heard did
not make him feel that the situation had improved with the twins exit from the
confrontation, but rather they had heightened it to a more dangerous, volatile
level.� It made him very anxious to get
out of his predicament and get Ed out of here and to safe ground as soon as
possible.� They needed to plan, alert the
military, get protection�

�Hurry,� encouraged Roy,
hearing the scrape of footsteps.� He
tired to twist his head around to see what was happening, but he couldn't tell
from what direction the noise was coming from with all the pitiful moans the
twins were making.

�Oh, no you don't,� the Seniore said, suddenly behind
Ed.� Roy called out a warring, but he had to watch
helplessly as the Seniore reached out for Ed and pulled him away.� After knocking into his table twice as they
struggled, Ed and his attacker spun out of sight.� He could hear Ed's grunt of pain and then the
hollow sound of someone hitting the floor, hard.

Very rarely did one recognize that their life was about to
change before their eyes, but Roy knew that he was about to lose something that
would forever tear at him if he didn't find a way out of these damn things tying
him down.� He pulled and strained, hoping
to break the rope in order to free himself.

�You little shit,� growled the
Seniore.� �You ruined them!� What good are they now, huh? I won't let you
live for that, you unworthy cunt!� yelled the Seniore.� Roy
could hear the sound of a wet crunch as a body hit the floor.

Roy
felt it then.� His normally calm and
carefully controlled emotions snapped in two.�
Something inside him broke and with it, he got very angry.� Roy
felt himself slip away from his physical body as the fire took over control of
his body.� He let the emotions wash over
him, welcoming them for the power it brought.�
Almost instantaneously the air in the morgue began to heat up, chasing
away the ambient chill.� Condensation
from the moisture in the air collected on the metal surfaces, and the windows
in the door.� Roy's bindings snapped apart with an angry
hiss of flame, freeing him to sit up on the table.� He looked down at the floor to see the
Seniore choking Ed and the weakening movements of Ed's struggles.

Planting his hands onto the table top,
Roy vaulted to
the floor as if the earlier torture meant nothing to him.� Beakers on shelves rattled, knocking off one
another as energy grew thick in the room, sliding to the edge to land on the
floor with small pops of breaking glass.��

Power cracked around his body,
lifting the trailing bindings and damp hair away from his face.� He let the power condense in his mind and
pushed it against the side of the Seniore's head with enough force to send the
man flying across the room.� Ed wasn�t
moving, but Roy
didn't stop to check on him.� The source
of his anger, his torturer, and Ed's tormentor, still needed to be dealt with
before he could check on Ed.�

Anything not tied down began to
move towards the center of the room as if Roy
was a magnet.� Calmly, Roy turned towards the direction he'd sent
the Seniore, taking a measured step.�
Suddenly all the objects slammed into the walls as Roy placed his advancing foot on the warming
concrete floor.� A table launched over
onto its side, flying towards one of the twins, pinning him to the wall.� The table edge quickly snuffing out his life
as it acted like a mouse trap, snapping his neck.� The other twin, knocked aside with by a
hurtling shelf, lay unmoving in the middle of the floor underneath the debris.�

The lamp, and only source of
illumination in the room, fell off its stand to smash into the floor plunging
the room into darkness.� Roy took another measured step, unmindful of
what was happening around him.� The
darkness began to recede as flames sprang to life and licked their way up his
arms.� There was now a clear path to the
cause of his fury; Roy
stalked towards his prey, noting the fear as the Seniore looked up from the
floor.�

�Wait!� Just wait!� yelled the Seniore, holding out
his hands to ward Roy
away.� �Let's talk about this,� he
begged.� Roy ignored the words coming from the man�s
mouth, continuing towards his goal.�
�Wait!� shouted the Seniore again.�
He scrambled to his feet, holding onto the wall to steady himself.� One hand slipped behind the Seniore's
back.� Roy halted his advance, wary of what the
Seniore could be reaching for.�

A triumphant smile eased across
the Seniore's face as he pulled a small hand gun out of the waist band of his
pants and pointed it at Roy's
chest.� With a derisive chuckle, the
Seniore waved the gun, confident that he now had the upper hand.

�Oh-ho, so a gun makes you stop
does it?� gloated the Seniore.� He took
his time regaining his equilibrium.�

Roy
smiled; a vicious, calculating smile.� Letting
his gaze take in every detail of the man before him.� He was wearing a poor fitting British uniform
that draped over his trim but softening frame.�
The gleam in his eyes belied his weak confidence and fear of what he saw
before him.� The Seniore had multiple
bruises over his face, distorting the planes of his cheeks into lumpy cottage
cheese.� But most of all, he was
sweating.� He was afraid of him.� He stank of fear that the warm room only
amplified.

�Stop whatever it is you're
doing,� commanded the Seniore, though his voice wavered slightly.� He pointed the gun to emphasize his
point.�

�I don't think I can,� said Roy, his voice sounding
like many roaring fires suddenly finding themselves with vocal cords.� Roy
tilted his head to the side in consideration of the sound of it.� �I would put down the gun.�� Roy
stared at the barrel pointed at him, then at the man holding it.� �You can't hurt me.�

The Seniore laughed, his face
twisted with scorn.� �You don't seem to
realize that I hold the weapon here.�

Roy
took a step forward, making the Seniore react by sliding along the wall to
maintain the distance between them.� Roy watched a large bead
of sweat roll its way down the distorted planes of his face to fall on his
shoulder.� The movement spoke of
instinct; fear and uncertainty.�

Everyone feared fire.

�Let me ask you this,� came the
strange voice again.� The Seniore
flinched.� �How do you think guns propel
the bullet out of the barrel?�� Roy waited; watched as
his words began to sink in.� �A hammer
knocks against the casing, causing a discharge of explosive material.� What if I were to...��

Roy
lifted his left hand, looking at the flames moving along his flesh, making it
concentrate in his palm.� He looked at
the man leaning against the wall blandly and watched as the gun in his hand
turned from a dull black to glow faintly as he quickly heated the metal.� The Seniore's eyes widened as he watched the
flame in his palm move and then yelped, finally noticing what he was doing to drop
the gun on the floor with a clatter.��

�Do you think you would be able to see me heating up the
metal?� wondered Roy,
still watching his hand.� The flame was
changing color now, going from a warm yellow to faint blue in the middle and
white on the outer edges.� Sparks began to spurt forth from the white hot ball of
fire, swirling around Roy's
body in an ever widening arc.

�What are you doing?� asked the Seniore hesitantly,
clutching his singed hand to his body.�
�Stop that.�

�Stop what?� wondered Roy.� The spinning sparks flew closer to the
Seniore making him retreat to the corner of the room.� Roy
followed him, smiling serenely.� The
light from the fire began to illuminate the whole room, painting a stark relief
on the Seniore's face.

�Stop that!� Stop that!�
Stop that!� the Seniore screeched.�
He squeezed himself into the corner, his eyes wide and wild with fear.

0-0-0-0-

�Fullmetal?�

Ed opened his eyes at the familiar
voice and saw only pristine blue sky.� A
warm wind knocked daises and long grass against the length of his body.� Lifting his right hand, he shielded his eyes
against the bright sun.� That was when he
noticed the change.� His right hand was real.

In bewilderment, he tuned his hand
over; his eyes tracing over the deep creases in his hand, marveling at the fact
that he could feel the wind move the small hairs and the temperature of the air
along his skin.� He smiled in pure
pleasure when he rubbed his thumb along his index finger up to the pad of his
fingertip and he felt it all!� The
sensations sent goose bumps tingling all over his body.

He quickly pushed himself into a
sitting position and ran both his hands over his left leg, and it was real
too!� This...this was amazing.� He was whole!�
A giddy bark of laughter burst from his mouth that was quickly stiffled.� Ed frowned in concentration.� Did he do this or did Al?� He was pretty sure that he was...at the
hosp...ital...

Twisting around, Ed saw that he
was sitting in a wide field, near the top of a gentle slope.� He turned the other way and saw Roy standing there, looking
down the small hill at the far end of the field with his smart-assed smirk on
his face, watching him from the corner of his eye.

�What are you looking at, Roy?� demanded Ed,
frowning at him.

�I think that that's the first
time you've ever called me Roy; at least that I can recall.�

�Huh?� I call you that all the time; since we first
met,� said Ed, folding his leg under him to stand.� Ed flickered his gaze down over Roy's clothes, noting the
dark three piece suit and red tie he was wearing, one hand in his pocket and
the other hanging limply by his side.�
�You look nice in a suit.� Better
then the uniform.�

�You think so?� asked Roy incredulously,
looking down at himself then glanced at Ed from the corner of his eye.� Roy
frowned as he looked back at him.� �Did
you...grow?�

Ed paused in brushing off his
clothing from lying in the grass.�
Several things swirled around his disjointed thoughts.� One; that this wasn't the Roy he thought it was.� Two; he was unsure if he wanted to be
insulted or complemented by that last remark.

Ever so slowly, Ed let his hands
fall away from neatening his clothing and stared at the man a few paces away
from him.� He had yet to turn to face him
fully, and Ed suspected that if he walked around to look him in the eye, he would
only find one eye to look in to.

�Mustang?� asked Ed with a frown.

�Am I supposed to be someone
else?� quipped the man, turning, and just as Ed guessed, there was a large
black cloth covering half his face from view.

�Yes, you are,� growled Ed.� He stomped his way across the distance
between them to glare up at the older version of Roy.�
�You're supposed to be Taylor.� If I'm back in Amestris, then what happened
to Al, to Roy?� And those twins?� The Seniore!�
I can't be here!� shouted Ed,
grabbing onto Mustang's lapels and yanking the man's face forward.

�Fullmetal!� growled Mustang, his
voice cold and without emotion.� �Release
me!�

�I'm no longer a 'dog of the
military', you can't order me around!� yelled Ed, shoving Mustang from him
anyway.� He sneered at the older man
through narrow eyes, watching warily as Mustang looked at him with that
damnable calm demeanor.�

�This was not how I had hoped
meeting you again would go.� And so soon,
too,� mumbled Mustang with a sad shake of his head.

�You're not meeting me,
this is a figment of my fucked-up imagination.�
You're a dream!� And pretty
soon, some fucked-up memory or something will make this dream into a nightmare,
and I'll wake up sweating!�� Ed gestured
with his arms, flinging them to the side to encompass the sunny field and his
peaceful surroundings.

�It's two years to the day since
you were last in Central,� said Mustang as if he hadn�t heard what Ed had said.

�What's that got to do with
anything?� demanded Ed, whirling around to glare at the man.� �Goddammit!�
I can't believe I thought I had a crush on you!� You infuriate me to no end!� Roy,
at least, I can talk too, but you!� You
just needle me and goad me into reacting!�

Mustang raised his one eyebrow at
him, but remained silent.� Ed couldn't
help but notice the smattering of gray at Mustang's temples, and the deep
creases around his mouth and between his eyebrows.� Even if it was a dream, it was shocking to
see that the effects of time on the man.�

�Well, as much as it flatterers me
to hear you had a crush on me, I think you should know that I like wo��

�Shut up!� snapped Ed,
crossing his arms across his chest and scowling at Mustang.� He knew all that already!� Why the hell was his subconscious doing this
to him?� �I must be in hell,� muttered
Ed.

�Yes, you might very well be
dead,� said Mustang.� Ed felt the truth
in those words, making him shudder.�
Frowning hard, Ed looked at his ex-commander.�

�If I'm dead, why am I here and
not at the gate?� How come I can't see
Hughes, or Izzy, or even mom?� Why are
you here?� Did you do something stupid
and die too?� asked Ed, watching Mustang's face very carefully.

Mustang closed his eyes, nodded
once and did a most unexpected thing; he smiled.� Ed gasped to see such genuine emotions on his
face.� Every interaction with Mustang he
ever had had always been full of carefully crafted masks and half-truths.� When Mustang open his eye again and met his
confused frown, he still smiled.�

�What's wrong with you?� demanded
Ed, his brow furrowing even more.� �Why
are you smiling?� he hissed suspiciously, hunching his shoulders and glaring.�

�Fullmetal...�� Mustang snorted softly to himself.� �I got hit by a car while crossing the
street.� I died on the way to the
hospital,� he said, a casual shrug of his shoulder.

�What!� hissed Ed.� He looked over Mustang's appearance once
more.� Now, he noticed that Mustang's
left leg seemed bent oddly underneath his slacks and there was a discoloration
near his patch that looked covered up.�

�Internal bleeding.� Then my lungs filled with blood and I
drowned.� Very embarrassing way to
go.�� Mustang made it sound like it
happened to someone else, that he wasn't the one that had died.

�So...I really am dead?�
wondered Ed with a concentrated frown.�
He stared off down the hill, not really seeing anything, but trying to
make sense of this.� He wasn't dreaming
and that was the hardest thing to accept, because all his dreams were shitty
but at least he woke up at the end of them.�
Was he really not going to wake up this time?

How would Al react when he found
out?� Ed felt as though his chest was
going to implode.� In the end it was him
leaving first.� Well, that was how it
should be.� He had never planned on
surviving the restoration of his brother's body in the first place.� These past two years had been a welcome
treat.� He got to see Al in the flesh
once more, see him react to his emotions, eating, sleeping...

�Am I really dead?� wondered Ed,
softly, under his breath.� He watched the
wind ripple through the grass creating the illusion of water lapping at the
shore; back and forth like waves.�

�Does that upset you?� asked
Mustang.� �Did you want to live?�

Ed whirled around, angry at such a
stupid question.� �Of course I did!� I didn't want to die!� Why would I?�
I have Al!�

�Is that all you have to live
for?� wondered Mustang, unperturbed by Ed's outburst.� �Only Al?�

�Wha�� Ed faltered as the sound of roaring fire rang
and cracked in his ears, echoing horribly inside his head.� Ed shook his head to banish the noise, but it
persisted.� Even when he covered his ears
with his two flesh hands, it did little to block out the noise.� It wasn't coming from the field.� He couldn't block it out.� �Ugh!�
What is that?�

0-0-0-0-

The sparks swirling around his
body began to speed up, whipping faster and faster until they became only
blurred lines of light.� The power moved
outward, away from his body, taking up more of the room until it just faded and
with it, the light.�

Roy
let his eyes slide closed.� The
afterimage of the burning body seemed implanted into his retina, constantly
showing him his transgression, reminding him of his sin.� Once again his temper had overtaken him and
as a result he had killed.� Only this
time, he killed humans.�

The weariness that had only abated
marginally since the other day came back in full force as the power left him
completely.� With a slow shuffling step, Roy turned aside from the
mess on the floor, to look over his shoulder.�
Through the cloud of ash in the air, he saw Ed sprawled across the floor
beside the desk, unmoving.

All his self-recriminations took a
back seat to the fact that Ed was very still.�

Maybe not even breathing.�

0-0-0-0-

Mustang seemed to study him with
that same self-smug grin that he always had plastered on his face whenever he
had come into the office; confident in that fact that Mustang couldn't possibly
know about all the things he'd done while out on mission.� No matter what though, he always knew what
had happened while out in the field.

Ed could only glare at the older
man while his head was filled with that incessant roar.� It didn't vary up or down, it just went on
and on, driving him mad.� He slowly sunk
to the ground, rocking on his heels as the noise reverberated inside his mind.

�Make it stop!� groaned Ed, his
hands fisting in his hair, squeezing his eyes shut in pain.� �Make it stop!�

ED!� Don't go!�
Breathe, dammit!

Ed gasped, opening his eyes wide
in surprise.� What!� Don't go?�
What did that mean?� He could hear
other sounds that didn't fit in with his surroundings.� Things knocking over, heavy breathing that he
assumed wasn't his own.� Ed convulsed
once.� His eyes opened wide as it felt
like someone had stuck him hard over his heart.�
His hands dropped from his head to clutch at his chest.

Breathe!

�What's�happening...?� whispered
Ed, feeling sweat trickle down the side of his face.� He convulsed again, gasping because it felt
like his whole chest might collapse.� He
fell to his knees, gasping.�

�Maybe you aren't as dead as I
think,� said Mustang, smiling again.

0-0-0-0-

Roy
pressed hard over Ed's heart, compressing the man's chest as he struggled to
recall his training on resuscitation.�
His harsh pants filled the cooling, no longer sterile room.� �Come on, Ed!� panted Roy.�
�Breathe, shorty.�� He compressed
Ed's chest again, adrenaline giving him extra strength.� �Ed!�
Please!�

Suddenly Ed arched off the floor,
gasping.� Roy fell back at the abruptness of it, and
then he was immediately slipping his good arm under his shoulders, lifting him
enough so that he could slide a leg under Ed and prop him up.� Roy�s
heart beat fast and queasily in his chest.�

�Roy?� whispered Ed in a gasping rough
voice.� That one syllable was enough to
send him into a fit of irritated coughing that brought tears to Ed's eyes as he
worked his throat, trying to swallow.

�Shh, shh, I got you,� murmured Roy, pulling Ed awkwardly
into an embrace.� Both of Ed's hands
pressed into the flesh of his back, pulling him closer to the blond.� Roy
stared at the wall, his mind blank for the moment.� Ed shuddered in his arm, drawing in
stuttering breaths.� It was several tense
moments before Ed could draw a breath without the harsh cough accompanying it.�

Roy
dropped his head, nosing the loose spill of hair that fell into his face as Ed
panted softly against his neck.� He began
to pull the hair out of the way, wanting to see just how bad Ed's neck was
bruised.� The golden hair, the color of ripe
wheat, was soft to the touch and moved easily through his fingertips.� As the last of the hair was moved away, Roy could see that the
whole of Ed's neck was deeply red and swollen.�
Without even thinking about it, he placed a gentle kiss along the side
of Ed's neck.��

�Ed...how could you do that?� Even as a trick�don't ever do that
again.� I don't want you to have to offer
up so much of yourself ever again,� said Roy
softly against the neck of the man in his arms.�
Ed tensed, trying to pull away.�
�No,� growled Roy, clinging to the shaking body.� �Just listen to me, please.�

�Roy,� croaked Ed, squirming in his hold.� �Where is��

�Shh, it's okay now.� I handled it,� said Roy, holding Ed's head close to his shoulder
so it couldn't look around.� He didn't
want Ed to know what he'd done.� But Ed
wouldn't be still.

�Handled it!� What do you mean?� said Ed gruffly, muffled
by his shoulder.� �Le'go, bastard,�
growled Ed, shoving on his lower rib cage to push him away.� Ed slapped the palm of his hand against Roy�s ribs in protest, making Roy grunt.

Reluctantly, Roy leaned back, dropping his gaze between
them.� He let his hand glide down Ed's
arm, where he took a hold of the cold left hand pressing on his side, squeezing
it.� Ed's right hand cupped his cheek.� The cool metal felt wonderful against his
overheated skin, soothing the last traces of the fire's hold on him.

�What happened here?� asked Ed
breathlessly, wonder and awe making his voice small.� Roy
hunched his shoulders.� He heard the
accusatory tone.� �What's all this white
stuff all over the place?�� The metal
hand dropped to his shoulder.� �What's
wrong with you?� How come you�re so
quiet?� asked Ed.� Ed shifted, his leg
brushing against his.� �Roy?�

�Ed...�� Roy
shook his head.� He couldn't make the
words come out.� He couldn't tell this
man, whose hand was in his, that he'd killed three men in his rage.� He couldn't say that the 'white stuff' was
all that was left of those men.� The last
time this had happened he'd only been a child and the only victims had been a
few rabid animals.� He had been so
crushed when he had found out; his grandfather could hardly console him.

Ed pulled away from him then,
leaving him feeling bereft for his touch and stood.� He could see Ed's booted feet turn away from
him, then they walked out of his sight.�

�Here.� Get dressed,� said Ed, handing him his
clothes.� �We should get outta here.� Damn, my chest hurts,� mumbled Ed.� Roy
looked up to see Ed winching while he rubbed the spot over his chest.

Roy
was on his feet in an instant.� �You
weren't breathing, Ed.� I'm sorry, I was
very...worried,� mumbled Roy,
taking his clothes.� He pulled his pants
from the bundle and slipped his long legs down each pant leg.

�Yeah...I had a weird dream,� Ed
mumbled back while Roy
zipped up his pants.� He turned away as Roy next pulled his shirt
out of the bundle and slid it over his arms.�
�Is he...gone?�

�He's gone,� confirmed Roy, pulling on his
jacket.� A deep sorrow pulled at his
heart, making it heavy.� No matter how
evil someone was, they never deserved to die.�
He had broken one of the Ten Commandments.� One of The Sins that should never be broken,
and he couldn't even confess to it.� Not
while his other future sin was in front of him like this.� For Ed, he would go to hell.�

�Roy?� asked Ed, turning enough to look at him
over his shoulder.��

�Yes, Ed?� said Roy.�
He could hear the remorse tinting his voice making him frown at
himself.� He should be better able to
hide these emotions.� He used to be
really good at it.� Roy tugged his jacket sleeve down over his
shirt cuffs.

�Thank you,� whispered Ed.� �Thank you for being you.�� Ed turned around fully and stepped into his
arms, holding him close.

�Ed!� What are you�� stammered Roy, shocked to suddenly have an armful of a
small blond man.� He lifted his arms to
encircle Ed, but stopped just before he touched him.�

�I, ah, just figured that you
might, um...I meant it, you know,� said Ed, muffled by his chest.� �I love you.�

Roy
swallowed thickly.� Noa's words suddenly
rang very loudly through his mind: Edward is fiercely loyal to his brother,
to the point of doing harm to himself in order to save the same torment from
befalling Alphonse.� He won't be easy to
control and made to live in a perpetual lie.�
Things will go wrong, and if Edward...falls for you the way you're
falling for him...

It seemed that Ed had fallen for
him and now he was hesitating.� He could
feel the expectation coming off the body pressed against him in waves.� Ed had been willing to give himself to that
man...just for him.� Just moments ago, he
was the one holding onto Ed, pulling him close and now he couldn't bring
himself to touch Ed.��

If you think this is too much
for you, then please, stop it before it has a chance to hurt either of you.

How on earth could he honor this
level of commitment from a man who he barely knew?� How selfish could he be by asking this man to
come to South Dakota
where he had planned on asking him to stay with him?� How could he think that it would be
okay?� Roy let his hand fall back to his side.��

�You don't have to say anything,�
said Ed quietly.� He looked up his chest
at him.� Those golden eyes locked on his
and seemed to understand his doubts and fears.�
They seemed to look right through him to where Roy couldn't hide.� Then the emotions contained inside those
wonderfully expressive eyes closed down, hid their thoughts from his view, and
Ed began to pull away, physically and emotionally.� He stepped away from him and looked down at
the floor, his hair hiding his face from view.

�Let's go.� I don't want to be here any more,� said Ed,
heading for the double swinging doors.� Roy noted the tone of
nonchalance, forced for his sake.� He was
starting to understand just how much Ed gave to those around him.� He was giving him his space, not forcing him
to say what he suddenly called into question.

The doors swung back and forth as
Ed went out into the hall.� It was like a
knife suddenly plunged through his heart, just like Noa had said had happened
to Ed, as he watched Ed's back leave the room.�
He had to choose!� But the choice
was so hard.� This would affect their lives, not just his, but Ed's,
Al's, and Noa's.� He was not just�� taking on one person, but all the people
that came with Ed as Ed would take on his baggage.� How could he force a near stranger to have to
deal with his awful mother and her twisted views on his mixed heritage?�

It took all his will to force his
foot to lift from the floor towards the door.�
He had to choose, but what was he going to choose?� Life alone, or life with Ed?� Roy
lifted his other foot off the floor.� Life
alone; he'd done it for twenty-four years already, it didn't seem like it would
be so bad to go the rest of his life that way.�
This way was simple, it was uncomplicated, it was...lonely.� It would be lonely.�

Roy
lifted his other foot; brining him closer to the door.� It seemed like he was wallowing through the
mud.� Each step seemed rooted to the
floor, as though there was thick muck sucking at his feet.

Life with Ed; that way had all
sorts of unknown twists and complications involved.� They would have to hide who they were, what
they felt.� He remembered a story that
circulated around his neighborhood as a kid, of some man being beaten to death
because he wasn't right in the head and the even fainter whispers that this man
liked other men.� That fear would hound
them.� Getting caught meant beatings,
dismemberment, or-or...who knew what else!��

Roy
lifted his left hand, placing it on the door then paused.� He took a slow, deep breath, almost choking
himself on the gray dust in the air.� He
hesitated again, his eyes searching though the window and the darkness beyond
for Ed's silhouette.� He could see
nothing in the dim hallway.� So that was
it then?� Ed had left him here?

With another soft, deep sigh, Roy pushed on the door
just enough to let him pass.�
But...instead of the door opening out into the hall it suddenly came
crashing back onto him!� It was so sudden
that the arm placed on the door did little to impede its swing, and it cracked
against his forehead making him reel in pain.

�Roy?�Oh shit!� exclaimed Ed, realizing what
he'd done.� �What are you doing standing
by the door, idiot!�

�What are you doing,
slamming doors into peoples� faces?� growled Roy, rubbing his aching head and glaring down
into Ed's surprised face.��

Ed shook his head and rolled his
eyes.� �You were taking too long.� I had to see what you were doing.� Come on, it's dark, and I want to see Al.�

�Wait, Ed!� said Roy quickly, grabbing the metal arm to stop
him from turning away again.�
Choose!� �I...�

�Can we do this later?� asked Ed,
sounding bored, forced.� �I really want
to see Al.�

Unable to let Ed go, and unwilling
to stay a moment longer, Roy
pushed Ed out into the hallway.� He
couldn't stand to be in that room any longer.�
�We can't do this later, we need to talk now.�

�So talk already!� I got to go,� growled Ed, impatiently.� He jerked his arm out of Roy's hold.�
That was it!� Ed was hurt by his
inability to answer.� He hadn't responded
to his declaration of love and now he was hurting, trying to get away before he
reveled too much.�

Roy
sighed at himself.� He was an
idiot.� Lifting his left hand from his
side, Roy
reached across the distance between them, about to touch Ed's cheek, but paused
before he actually touched him.� Ed
didn't move other then to look at that hand questioningly, then at him.

�Ed, this is hard for me, please
understand,� said Roy
softly, finally forcing himself to let his hand touch the side of Ed's
face.� Ed remained silent,
listening.� �I've had a hard life.� I spent the first part of my childhood on the
reservation living with my grandfather before my mother took me away to Boston.� I was force fed religion until it became a
part of me.� It's hard to walk away from
that.� There are so many things...I'm not
normal.� If I get mad things...die...I
don't want to accidentally wake up and find that you are one of those
people.� I just can't��

�So...are you saying that you do
want to be with me, or you don't?� asked Ed quietly.� Ed held himself very still and stiff under Roy's hand.� Roy
could just see the flash of faint light reflected in Ed's now dark eyes as they
flickered from one side of his face to the other.

�I'm saying,� began Roy carefully.� �That no matter what, this is a difficult
decision�for both of us.� One that can't
be taken lightly.� I'm saying that�� Roy
sighed before he ran his hand through Ed's loose hair, holding onto the back of
Ed's skull.� �I'm saying that�I don't
know.� But I want to have the chance to
know.� Can you give me that?� asked Roy, pulling very lightly
on the back of Ed's head, hoping that he would understand.

Ed took a step towards him.� �How long?� asked Ed, his flesh hand hooking
over his bent elbow, sounding eager to get this out of the way.� �How long do you want?��

�Are you always this impatient?� wondered
Roy, a smile
tugging at his lips.

�Just answer the damn question,
bastard,� snapped Ed, though with a hint of mirth in his tone.� He took another small step towards him and
looked up into his face.

�Must you call me that?� asked Roy.� He knew that Ed didn�t mean it in the literal
sense.� But Roy was a bastard child.� Half Indian, half white man.

�Stop stalling.� How long do you want?�

�As long as it takes, Edward.� Now let's go up stairs,� said Roy, letting his hand
fall away.� Ed glared at him, he could
feel the weight of it.� This wasn't
over.� He could feel the questions and
demands still lingering.�

�Fine,� said Ed, taking a step
backwards.� �Let's go see Al.�

--To Be Continued�

I can�t say I�m whole please with this chapter, but I didn�t want to
make you wait any longer.� It just feels
flat to me, but I�m currently not up to fixing it.� Maybe someday�

PLEASE review�I know I�m horrible for making you wait for this chapter
for so long, but I need encouragement!�
Encourage me!!!
- 22
- 23
- 24
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

A Little Light of Love