Nightmare

Review Replies: chelzi, thanks. Yes, Roy's being protective of Ed. Lilith, thanks for reading. Yes, Roy does feel responsible, but he isn't the only one. Evermist, I know, it was short. That chapter was written after I decided this was more than a one-shot. MustangsHavoc, Give me time. I'm still writing. You're getting this just a little behind when I write it. It isn't coming out quite as fast as the other two beasts. Velvetina, I'm glad you've found the fandom and are enjoying this story. There are quite a few very good authors out there, and I hope you read their fiction as well. I'd compile a list, but I could be here forever. bloody_rose, yes, Roy crying is sad. Thanks for reading.

Chapter 3

It was late as Roy awoke from sleep, cold sweat dripping down his body. He silently cursed; he truly didn’t need another thing to have nightmares about. Sighing to himself, he glanced at the bed to his right, of the two, further from the door. To watch the gentle rise and fall of the teen’s chest would lead most to think that for once, Ed was having a peaceful night’s sleep, but Roy knew better. He knew this was a medicated sleep and that Ed was nowhere near feeling peaceful, even while unconscious.

Roy shifted around on his bed, feeling oddly restless. Perhaps it was knowing that the Rockbell girl and Shezka were returning from Risembool tomorrow morning. He had to admit that he was not looking forward to seeing either of those women. Shezka had accused him of completely ignoring the murder of his closest friend, and he didn’t know if she would see now what he’d done as part of a plan or not. He didn’t know if it would redeem him in her eyes, and for some reason that bothered him, perhaps because he could not hear words of understanding from Maes. Then there was Winry, and Roy knew she’d forgiven him, if just a little, for her parents, but it didn’t mean he’d forgiven himself.

And what would she think of him after she saw her childhood friend? Would she see him as the monster he felt like?

Roy again looked over at Ed’s bed. He had honestly expected to find Ed lost somewhere, but no more worse for the wear than a few scrapes and bruises and a nastier-than-usual temperament. He anticipated Ed might need a little mending, but in the end, Roy would find himself bickering with Edo about this or that, tossing out short jokes, licking wounds from age ones. Ed would probably have questioned what had taken so long to rescue him, but in the end, he’d need little more than to brush himself off.

Really, after all he’d seen, the brigadier general should have known better than to have such optimism when it came to the military and missing personnel.

He shook his head, before resting it again on the pillow. He needed to sleep.

********

Riza had gotten the phone call from Kain late that night. He hadn’t been able to do anything in the way of convincing the young man, and apparently, thought that Riza would have better luck. She walked to the little bar/restaurant, finding Al seated at one of the booths, poking at what looked like cheese fries.

She made her way through the smoke-filled place and sat next to Al on the booth, not having given him any prior notice to her presence.

“Oh!” the young man said, startled.

“It’s late, Alphonse,” she said.

“Lucky for me this place is open late.” His voice was not as clear and crisp as it should have been.

She looked at the glass currently sitting next to the half-eaten plate of food. “Is that alcohol?” she asked, her tone cold.

“It is,” Al said. “I’m old enough now.”

“You’re fifteen.”

“No," he said, shaking his head. “The doctors say my body is nineteen. Lucky me, I avoided puberty all together.”

“Al,” she said, using the tone that Riza had perfected on her superior officer.

“No, Lieutenant. I can drink what I want. Legal age is 18 and is just one positive point to the fact that I’ve lost four years off my life. At least I can drink if I want to.” Al’s eyes met hers.

“You’re foolishly confident when you have alcohol in your system.”

Al just chuckled. “Go figure. I was terrified of you even when you couldn’t hurt me in the armor. Now you really could hurt me, but thanks to liquid courage, I’m not scared.” He continued to chuckle until the shaking of his shoulders was no longer due to laughter, but from heart-wrenching sobs.

Without second thought, Riza wrapped her arms around Al. “Alphonse, talk to me.”

“Not here,” he said, shaking his head.

“Then come back to my place. You can sleep this off there.” The young man wiped at his eyes and looked at her. “Don’t let Havoc know this was all it took to get to stay at my place.” She climbed out of the booth, noticing Al was looking up at her in surprise.

“Lieutenant Hawkeye, you made a joke.”

********

Al’s mind was still cloudy when he arrived at the first lieutenant’s apartment, greeted by a happy, but well-behaved Black Hayate. Riza gestured to a small sofa near the back wall.

“Have a seat, Alphonse,” she said.

He nodded and did as instructed, feeling a little off-balance from the alcohol, but nowhere near as drunk as he remembered his brother on the one night he’d gone out with some of Mustang’s team.

And again, at the thought of his drunken, laughing brother in his mind, Al broke, sobbing even as the older woman let him rest his head on her shoulder and wrapped her arms around him.

“I gave up on him,” he said, encircling his own arms around her as he cried. “I really thought he was gone when Father and I went down to fight the homunculi and Dante. Just thinking for sure he was dead was the very worst thing I could do. I had actually started to consider it. I didn’t even hesitate to use the stone for my own purposes. I used it, and now I have a body and Father isn’t ill, but where is Ed? He’s in a hospital bed, hardly himself at all anymore.”

Riza said nothing comprehendible, rather opting to make soft noises in Al’s ear, letting him sob out his guilt onto her shirt, leaving it tearstained.

“Al, I know what it is to think you’ve failed someone you care about. Believe me.” He looked up at her, large brown eyes seeking something in her orange-tinted ones.

“The brigadier general. When he was shot.” Then, Al winced at his own words. “I’m sorry. That was too blunt of me. I shouldn’t have…”

“I opened it up for conversation,” Riza said, shaking her head and rubbing his back.

“We’re a nice pair, aren’t we?” he asked. “Wallowing in our guilt.”

“You seem to be doing more of the wallowing,” she said.

Al said nothing more, but he took her hand and held it a moment. Both understood, and that was enough.

********

“Rise and shine,” said the redheaded nurse Ed had grown to loathe. “We need to get you checked up. The doctor will be in soon, and I think I heard someone’s automail mechanic… a pretty little blonde, is waiting outside.”

“Really, now, must you be so obnoxious this early in the morning?” a low voice said to Ed’s side.

Ed looked over and managed the faintest bit of a smile at him, a silent thank you that he didn’t have to be the one being cruel to this nurse, the person who could “inadvertently” cause pain while treating him.

“Just be grateful I am not your nurse,” the redhead said. “if I were…”

“No need for idle threats, ma’am,” Mustang said, though he was obviously four or five years older than this woman, “I am thankful for that fact each and every morning you come in to terrorize my roommate.”

“Well, now,” she said, looking just the slightest bit flustered. “I am glad I have the better of the two patients. Now, let’s have a look at your stats. And the doctor wanted a quick check of your other injuries.”

Ed’s eyes grew wide at that.

“This early in the morning?” Mustang asked her.

“Yes, well, having a mechanic come in to measure him for fittings is going to take a little bit of time, and after she is gone, he won’t be able to come in until afternoon. We just need to see that the tears are continuing to heal.”

Ed could feel his entire body tensing up. Mustang was still here, and it wasn’t his doctor, wasn’t the woman he’d grown familiar with.

It certainly wasn’t pride that was keeping him from wanting to be seen, it was just that… He just couldn’t do it. He was hyperventilating, and he didn’t know how to stop it. He had barely managed to get himself accustomed to the idea of his doctor, and now there would be someone else poking and prodding at him, dredging up things he wanted locked away.

“Fullmetal,” that voice said again, breaking his own inner-turmoil, “I don’t think I told you about an alchemy question that was posed to the state a few weeks back.”

It took Ed a few seconds to regain himself and actually speak. “Oh? Who solved it? Was it Al?” Ed asked, momentarily focusing on what the man was telling him. He hoped it had been Al who solved the problem, wanting to be proud of his little brother. Maybe even if it was Mustang, he could manage a little of the sentiment for his superior officer.

“No one has,” Mustang said. “It remains unsolved.”

“Then why are you asking me if even Al couldn’t figure it out. He’s better at that kind of stuff.”

“With books, I will grant you that he is nearly as knowledgeable about alchemy as Falman about everything else, but he does not have your ingenuity when it comes to using alchemy. You are fairly creative and can almost visualize a transmutation before it happens. You can do that more than anyone else that’s ever been a state alchemist.”

Ed’s brows met in confusion. A compliment? From Mustang?

He shook his head. He didn’t deserve it; he wasn’t special, certainly not when there was his brother, who’d managed to use the philosopher’s stone for himself, his father who could do the same thing, even Mustang, who could do a form of alchemy that Ed simply didn’t have the patience for.

“Listen, Ed,” Mustang said, “I know how much you hate these inspections, but do you think we could discuss this transmutation, and take your mind off of it?”

A distraction technique. Of course. Naturally, his roommate didn’t need his advice. Ed was just the little pet he’d rescued and taken pity for. But, at least Mustang had saved him. If he wanted Ed to play along with this distraction, Ed could.

He nodded. “Tell me,” he said, as the nurse carefully put up some privacy screens and sheets to prevent Mustang from seeing anything other than Ed’s pained face.

“Well, the Cerulean Alchemist, she’s a water alchemist, she was preparing to invent a new transmutation. This symbol, actually…” The older man began drawing on a nearby notepad.

********

When Winry came in, she heard Ed actively discussing a point of debate, and it sounded like they were fairly far along in the discussion, despite the fact that the nurse had left the room not long before.

“Well, you and Al were both wrong, but on different things,” she heard her friend say. “Al forgot that when combining hydrogen in that way, you are nearly forcing the oxygen in the water to turn into ozone. You had more focus of the oxygen, but you made the hydrogen too combustible… Not that it is too much of a surprise for you.”

“Flame Alchemist and all, it is a force of habit,” the second voice said.

“You are a pyromaniac,” Ed said.

“I will not deny it.”

Winry could hardly believe that such a discussion could take place, and she looked over at Al and Riza Hawkeye. Both looked hopeful at the banter going on inside, as though this wasn’t normal.

“Give them a few more minutes, Miss Rockbell. I think they need this.”