Shiver

Chapter 4

The Dinner

Damn, this fucking erection is never going to go away. I opened Mustang's door and hurried down the hall, covering my groin as best I could. How could he do this to me? More importantly, why? As I passed Havoc, I hid my head in shame. There was no way I was going to let him see me like this, all flushed and flustered.

"Hey, Fullmetal? I hear you have a new assignment. Care to tell me what it is?" A cigarette dangled out of Havoc's grinning lips.

Gasping, I glared at him. "Who the hell told you?" I was furious. This was not at all what I'd wanted.

"I heard it from Fuery." He stood there, looking at me as if it was obvious.

Oh God, if Fuery knew, who else? I had to answer. He was waiting. "No, I don't care to tell you what it is. I'm busy."

I started down the hallway again, even more confused than I was before.
"Don't have to be such an ass about it," Havoc called out.

I squeezed my eyes shut for a second, in a rage, still hustling down the hallway. If I could just get to the library, then I could sulk in peace. And maybe, this damn erection would go away.

***

With my leg thumping on the floor, I gazed at the clock. Two hours had passed since Mustang left me this way. Try as I might, I just couldn't stop thinking about my penis. Damn him. If only he hadn't told me I couldn't touch it, then I wouldn't want to touch it. But, the damn thing was still humming in my trousers, standing tall every time I . . .shit, there it goes again.

I shifted in my seat, making room for it for the hundredth time in two hours, or so that's what it seemed like. I was in agony. He had me so worked up in his office; I just about died when he told me I wasn't getting mine. He's going to pay for this, I thought, grinning.

Then, I sighed. At least I was finally his. Something was finally happening between us, after all these years. I suddenly realized I was sitting at the long library table with my cheek resting on my palm, supported by my elbow, gazing into nothing. I startled. What a lovesick idiot I must look like.

I tried to focus on my book again. If only the pages didn't keep blurring and every time I shifted, the friction of my pants didn't keep teasing me. Then a thought occurred to me, what if I just rubbed against something? Then I wouldn't be touching myself, would I?

I looked around the library with a very devious grin on my face. Just about any surface looked appetizing at the moment. Even the book I was reading. What if I just let it slip into my lap and—

"Hey, Fullmetal?"

"Huh?" Looking up at Havoc, the new bastard, I was hunched over, the book pressed squarely against my now aching again erection.

"Interesting thing you've got going with that book there. Didn't know you had eyes in your pants." Chuckling, the cigarette dropped an ash on the table.

"Fuck you, Havoc. Go drop you're ashes somewhere else." I sat up, but kept the book where it was. He didn't need to see what was going on behind it. Instead of going away, he seemed more interested in my predicament.

Havoc leaned over the table. The smoke made tiny circles around the side of his blond head, then, disappeared. "Why are you being such an ass today? The Colonel got you all worked up about something?"

I wriggled in my seat, gazing down at the beige carpet floor to the side of me. I spoke in a low voice, "You could say that."

Crouching down, Havoc rested his arms on the table and looked directly into my face. "So, what's up?"

I flushed. There was no way I could look into his eyes. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Well, what happened yesterday? I saw you two outside the pub, you know. I always knew you had a thing for him," he said, voice soft.

Gasping, I looked at him in surprise. "How the hell did you know?"

Havoc held up his palms. "Aw, come on, Ed. The way you looked at him, how tongue-tied you always got around him, all the insults. When I saw you two kiss, it just sort of all fell into place."

I leaned forward, studying his face. "Who else knows?"

He leaned back and stood up. My eyes chased him. "No one. Just me, I think."

I thought for a minute, glancing around the room. At least my erection was quelled for the moment. Should I ask Havoc about this arrangement Mustang had me in? Maybe he could shed some light on the whole issue. No, there was no way I could tell him about that. It was too embarrassing. I'd look like a lovesick idiot. Even though that's exactly what I was, I'm not about to let anyone else know it. "Well, I uh, we just kissed outside, that was all. It's nothing, really." If I looked at him, he'd see my lie.

His voice sounded sarcastic as he replied, "Really?"

I looked up at him, pleading. "Please, don't tell anyone, okay? Please?"

Havoc's demeanor changed, he looked uneasy. Raking a hand through his blond bangs, he scanned the room for a moment. "Okay, just watch yourself." Then, he strode away, toward the front doors.

I slumped. The book in my lap suddenly brushed against my groin. I felt myself hardening. That's it. I had to get out of here.

***

I walked to my dorm room, feeling defeated. Mustang didn't send for me the rest of the day. It made me wonder when I would see him next. I'd have stormed his damn office if we didn't have this stupid arrangement. I'd have demanded he tell me what in the hell was going on. But, no questions meant no questions, right? Grinning, a thought occurred to me, the one that kept me going through it all. He did want me, he told me so.

I opened the door to my dorm room and was immediately assaulted by Al.

"Brother?" He clanked over to stand directly in my path.

I looked up to his metal head. God, I wish he was skin and bones again, something I could touch and hold. "What is it, Al?" My anguish rang out in my voice.

"What's wrong?"

"Ah, nothing. Just tired." I slipped by him and stepped to my bed, pushed up against the far wall.

"Too tired to go out with the Colonel?" Al turned around, tapping his big metal feet with excitement.

I whirled around. "What?" I couldn't hide the wide smile on my face.

Al clanked over to me, his arm outstretched, a folded paper in his hand. "It says you're supposed to meet him for dinner, at seven, Zinc Bistro."

I snatched the note away, a little perturbed. "You're not supposed to read notes addressed to other people." I read the note. It said exactly what Al had told me. On impulse, like an idiot, I clutched it to my heart and looked longingly upward.

"So?" Al had his hands held tight to each other in front of him.

Oh, this was so stupid. Now we both looked like idiots. I slapped Al with my automail hand. The sound of it rang in my ears. Good, maybe it would knock some sense into me. "So, I guess we're having dinner tonight."

"Did anything happen today?"

I shook my head and headed for the bathroom. Al knew about my obsession with the Colonel, there was no way I could hide it from him all those years. And, I'd told him about what happened last night. But, what I couldn't tell him about, was the arrangement. It seemed too seedy and I didn't think Al would understand. As I did my business in toilet, I thought back to the first day Al figured out why I never dated girls.

-O-

The train window bumped the side of my head, making it jiggle slightly. I had my eyes closed, imagining myself with Roy Mustang. He was kissing me, as always, his hands were all over my body. Stopping for a moment, he gazed into my eyes.

"I love you, Edward."

I melted. I'd never tire of hearing those words out of his mouth. The growing erection in my trousers made me shift in my seat, bringing me out of my daydream. My eyes opened, focusing on my brother.

"What were you thinking about?" Al sat opposite me, swaying with the motion of the train, arms crossed over his hulking metal chest.

I blushed instantly and looked away. The sound of the train thumping over the track seemed to boom in my ears. "Nothing." It was my standard answer.

He shifted in his seat and leaned forward. His voice was low, as if he didn't want anyone but me to hear him. "You were thinking about the Colonel, weren't you."

Gasping, I started to deny it. But, why should I? I leaned forward, looking at his glowing orbs directly. "Yeah, I was."

Instead of showing shock, he maintained his position. "Thought so."

-O-

And that was it, I thought, attempting to tuck my aroused member back into my pants. "Damn," I muttered. It almost felt too good just touching it to take a leak. What would Mustang have in store for me tonight? I just hoped he'd finally take care of this little problem I was having.

***

There it was, Zinc Bistro. A neon sign lit up the window. After paying the driver, I opened the cab door and stepped out into the crisp evening. The sun had set an hour ago and the air was still around me. As I walked up to the glass doors of the restaurant, I could hear hushed voices from the people who strolled by. Central at night, was just a typical city.

Tugging the door open, I shook off the cold as I stepped inside. Immediately, I was met by a maitre'd. As he hurried me through the tables, I became aware he must have been waiting for me. I scanned the restaurant. Dark wood lined the walls and small stained-glass lamps gave a warm glow to the half-filled dining room. White linens covered the tables and fine silverware with white china sat on each one. This was a nice restaurant indeed, that Roy was meeting me at.

I was led to a small inset booth with beige velvet draperies covering the opening. I had to smirk, figures Roy would pick something private, although, the thought also made me harden again.

Peering inside, I saw my handsome Roy, dapper in a black suit, gazing over a menu. I winced at the tightness in my leather pants as I scooted in beside him. The seat of the booth curved all the way around the table in a half-circle.

Roy grinned at me. "Good evening, Edward."

A menu was handed to me, but I couldn't take my eyes off Roy. "Good evening."

After nodding to the maitre-d, Roy shimmied in next to me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. I noticed the curtains closing. I was in heaven. Wait, did I say I was in heaven? I was in heaven. My breath quickened and my heart pounded, I could hardly stand it. I had to pretend to look at the menu. If I looked at Roy again, I'd take him here, on the table. Shatter the fine china and break all the glasses shoving them aside, take him. Needless to say, I started to tremble. I was so hard, I almost ripped the front of my pants. And, they were leather.

"Ed, you okay?"

"Y-yes. I-I'm fine." I felt his hand on my thigh, it caressed lightly, up and down, each time going a little higher. I feigned a cough into my hand. Involuntarily, I shifted my hips, trying to get his fingers where I wanted them. They brushed against me. I moaned softly, the menu be damned. It dropped from my hand and I turned to claim his beautiful full lips.

He pulled away, smug grin on his face. "My my, we are a little wound up tonight."

Anger filled my chest. "What did you ex—"

"Now, now, don't want to break the rules, do you?" He sat back and took a sip of red wine from his glass.

All my anger deflated in one heavy sigh. I blew a lock of hair off my forehead and decided to see what he'd had in store for me. Apparently, he didn't ask me to kiss him, so I couldn't. Or so, this is what I deduced, being the prodigy that I am.

Picking my menu up, I quickly scanned through the steaks. I knew what I wanted, well, besides Roy. I usually had the same meal when I went out, steak and potatoes, nothing too fancy. I heard the sound of liquid lapping at the sides of a glass. Roy put his arm around me again as a filled wine glass was shoved under my nose.

"Here, maybe this will calm you down." Roy chuckled, waiting for me to take the glass.

Setting the menu down, I took it from him and swirled it around. I had no idea why people did this, but I wanted to look at least a little sophisticated, maybe a little older too. I put it to my lips and sipped it, as I heard you must do. Heat suddenly penetrated my inner thigh from Roy's hand. It was seated nicely just below my aching groin. I sputtered a little, bringing the wine glass down.

Roy's breath teased my neck, sending shivers down my spine. What was I supposed to do? He didn't tell me to do anything yet. Did that mean I just had to sit here and take it? I licked my lips, longing for something in my mouth besides the acidic aftertaste of the wine. Then his lips brushed against the nape of my neck, so soft, like butterfly wings. I felt the hair stand up on my neck. His lips pressed harder, more insistent, on my skin. Closing my eyes, I moaned, soft and low, and tilted my head back.

"Like that, Ed?"

I pressed up with my hips, feeling my pants give the slightest bit of pressure to my erection. I'd have shoved up against the underside of the table, if I thought he'd let me. "M-Mustang, what are you—"

"Sh . . . no questions." He suddenly sucked hard on my neck.

The pain was exquisite, making me bite my lip to keep from crying out. It ran a pulse straight down to my groin. I could feel myself start to whimper, but I caught it.

The curtain drew open with a quick rush of metal hooks on a metal runner. Everything seized up as I looked at a waiter.

"Excuse me. Are you ready to order?" The waiter was a thin man in a cheap white suit with a towel hanging over one arm.

I relaxed in my seat, letting out a rush of held air. If Roy didn't take me soon, I thought I'd explode, literally.

Roy casually sat back, took a sip of wine, and pointed to something on his menu. "How is the Filet tonight?"

"Very good, sir."

"I'll have that. Bring one for my friend, here, too." Roy glanced at me and smiled.

Looking at Roy in confusion, I opened my mouth to speak, but the waiter left and the curtain was drawn shut again.

He leaned toward me, so close our noses almost touched. I couldn't help but think about his lips on mine.

"Since you're my." He paused for a moment, before choosing the right word. "Pet, I'll order for you."

Pet? my head screamed. What was going on here? What the hell was "Filet" anyhow? Better not be some kind of fish. My face screwed up as I formulated something to say in protest that wasn't a question, because, questions weren't allowed, but I wanted answers and I didn't want to break the rules.

"You do like steak, don't you?" Roy asked, with a smug grin. He wrapped his arm around me and drew me in.

I nodded, placated. I loved being in his arms, but would love having him do something to me more, right here, right now. I waited for something to happen. His hand came down again, between my legs. It ran a light circle on my thigh, just enough to tease the hell out of me. Squirming and closing my eyes, I let out a soft sigh. "Please, Roy, touch me."

Roy's hand went right to my groin. I held my breath, the heat penetrating into me, sending a sweet pulse into my body. I involuntary thrust my hips up, desperate to get friction.

Roy snatched his hand back. He squeezed me tight. "Ed, you can't do that. You have to wait for me to do things to you."

Grinding my teeth together, I felt my anger flare. But, I held back, I had to play the game. It's what you do when you love someone, right?

The curtains opened and the waiter set plates of filet mignon, mashed potatoes, and broccoli before us. I breathed in the aroma of the food, lovely. I went to pick up my silverware, but Roy's hand found my groin again. He ran his palm hard against the surface of my pants, making me melt with pleasure. God, it felt good. My plate blurred as my eyes glazed over. He did it again, sending a delicious shudder through my body, making me slouch forward with a gasp.

"What's the matter, Ed? Not hungry all of a sudden?"

The palm increased its speed and pressure, rubbing over and over, making my brows tense, a moan fill the small space over the table.

"I asked you a question, Ed."

My words came out as a slow groan. "I-I, oh, damn, keep going."

The hand stopped. My whole body shook with need.

"I want you to eat. As long as you eat, I'll give you what you want," Roy said with a devious grin.
Glancing over at him, still a bit dazed, I saw the fire of lust burning in his eyes. Turning back to my meal, I shoved a mouthful of potato in my mouth. His hand began its attack again, swirling and squeezing over the tip of my erection. I was humming, wanting to thrust up, wanting to release all my pent up frustration.

Roy's hand stopped again. "Chew, Ed."

It was then I realized I had left the potatoes sitting on my tongue. I swallowed hard. "M-mustang, I don't know if I can eat when you're doing that."

"Then I won't do it."

I glared at him, the smug bastard. I watched with a mixture of anger and lust doing battle inside me. It was delectable and frustrating, what he was doing to me. But, he told me he wanted me, didn't he?

Roy adeptly ran his knife through his steak, picked it up with his fork, and brought it to his mouth. After chewing and gulping it down, he picked up his wine glass and sipped it, just so, like the suave man he was.

I watched, fascinated, opening my mouth when he did, closing while he closed. I wanted to be in that mouth, surrounded by those lips, crushed by those teeth. Shaking my head, I struggled to get a hold of myself. I looked down at my plate, suddenly hungry for something other than the persistent need inside me. I devoured my food, hardly stopping to take a breath. Who needed to breath anyway? I mused.

When dinner was over, Roy paid the check and we left, without further incident. It was as if Roy just turned off. I was left feeling wounded, like I'd done or said something to warrant his rejection.

He hailed a cab, holding a door open for me as I climbed inside. I looked out the window in silence, watching the blur of the lights rush passed me. Roy scooted over beside me. If felt his arm around me. My eyes closed, anticipating the delicious feel of his hand on my groin again. But, it never came. Instead, I felt his lips licking at the skin on my neck. It sent shivers through my body, tingled my length into another hard erection. All this going up and down, couldn't be good for me, I thought.

As I sat, squirming a little in my seat, Roy's hand roamed my chest. It worked its way up under my shirt, finding a nipple. He pinched it hard, making my back arch and a sharp gasp fill the cab. Horrified, I looked over at the driver. He glanced at us in his mirror, but made no other display of acknowledgement of my slow and steady decline into exquisite submission.

I turned my head, wanting to taste the man toying with me. I used my gaze, directed at his lips, to ask for permission. He claimed me, hard and penetrating, tongue entering and flicking inside my mouth. It took every speck of will not to reach down and fondle myself. I briefly wondered if a kiss could make me spill, right then and there. But he continued on, teasing my nipples, one after the other, while making love to my mouth.

I began to pant and writhe in his touch, not caring about the driver or the people on the sidewalk anymore. Then, Roy pulled way, stopping everything.

Roy wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, staring straight ahead of him. "So, I guess you'll be going back to you're dorm room now?"

"What?" I couldn't believe it.

"No questions, Ed, remember? 'what' is a question." He sat with his hands folded in his lap.

I felt tears fill my eyes, this couldn't be happening. Did I do something wrong? Didn't he want me after all? Wasn't I good enough? I looked over at him, studying him, biting my lip to keep the tears from falling.

Tenderly, Roy took my hand. His expression held concern. "Ed, don't do that."

I felt sobs building in my chest. Damn him, what had he done to me? I don't just sob, that's not me. It must be the pent up tension, it had to have a release, and tears were a release, weren't they? "R-Roy. I don't want to go back. Don't make me go back, please." I knew the last time I'd begged, he'd given me what I wanted.

Roy smiled. "Okay, Ed. I'll let you have your way this once." Leaning over, Roy kissed my forehead.

We pulled up to Roy's house and I watched him pay the driver. I hurried out and ran up his drive to his front door. I was terribly impatient to get inside, anticipating the feel of him all over me.

Roy walked up and opened the door, letting me enter first. He strode in, flicked on the light, and took off his jacket, draping it across a chair in the main room.

Waiting for him, my hand brushed against my groin, making my eyes close. I turned around suddenly, realizing, if he didn't see it, he wouldn't know what I was doing. I paced into the hallway, leaned against the wall, and stroked hard on myself through my pants. I just couldn't take anymore. My knees buckled and I literally bit my tongue to keep the moans from forcing their way out. I couldn't do it just once, I kept doing it, over and over, relishing in every sweet pulse that racked my body.

Roy came around the corner. "Ed! I told you not to touch yourself! Do you want me to send you home?" Hands on his hips, he glared at me.

I was paralyzed with fear. "N-no, Roy, I-I . . ."
"Come here." Roy grabbed my arm and shoved me into his bedroom. "Get undressed, now!"

Trembling, I did as I was told. I felt tears surface again. Gasping, I held them back. He didn't want to see me cry, either, right? I fumbled with my buckles, strained to remove my clothing fast enough. All the while, fighting against tears, against anger and resentment, against my arousal. When I'd finally removed the last article of clothing, I stood facing him, head lowered, erection tall and firm. I was beaten, ready and willing to do his bidding.

Roy grabbed me and pushed me toward the bed. "Bend over."

I did as I was told, bending forward, placing my straight arms under me to hold me up on the bed. I felt him come up behind me. His bare foot kicked at my ankles, prodding me to spread my legs for him. I ached, even now, for him to touch me. I'd take anything he had to give, anything.

My head hung between my arms, unable to support it's weight any longer. I saw him rummaging in his nightstand, taking out the bottle of oil he'd used on me yesterday. I twitched. A wave of desire overtook me just at the sight of it.

Roy came back to me, standing behind me.

I saw his trousers drop behind my feet. I felt something slick in the crevice of my ass. My knees felt weak again. He circled my entrance, quick and hard. I leaned back into it, craving it, yearning to feel him inside me. A finger slid in. Gasping, I shuddered. Another came in, exploring, prodding my bundle of nerves. An intense jolt of pleasure flashed through me, making me groan and twist. It felt so good, I swear I almost lost it, almost squirted my seed all over his nice little duvet.

Roy chuckled. "Like that, Ed?"

"Yes," I groaned. His fingers hit the spot again and again, trying to send me over the edge.

"I knew you would. In fact, you like all of this, don't you? The waiting."

"Yes."

"The tension."

"Yes."

"The submission."

"Y—" I felt him enter me, hard and unyielding. My insides burned for a second, then, as he pulled almost all the way out and drove back in again, the bliss returned. I cried out, an animalistic roar of rapture. Never before has such a sound escaped my mouth. I didn't care. I was finally getting something to relieve the frustration coiled up inside me.

I heard the slapping of skin-on-skin as he pounded me from behind, like a sweet thrumming in my ears. My moans came loud, one after another. I felt his body lean over mine, his chest against my back. His arm wrapped around me, pinching my nipple. His teeth teased my neck. I started to buckle. I felt his solid arms lifting me back up. Surely my climax would pour out of me soon, even without any direct stimulation.

Roy grew rigid behind me, driving hard and deep, low moans coming out of him. His hand reached down between my legs and, just as he began to stroke, my peak devoured me. My cries rang out in the room. He stroked. I swooned. My seed erupted, spurting up against my chest, raining down on my legs. I gasped, fighting for air, as wave after wave of intense contractions filled my body with pleasure.

Still panting, I stood, barely able to hold myself up as it all slowed and Roy pulled out of me.