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Descent	By : ZaKai Category: Fullmetal Alchemist > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 14665 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 40
- 41
- 42
Review Replies:

Sasurto: Hm, that�s strange that you didn�t get an update e-mail...
did you check your spam folder?�
Hopefully you�ll have gotten the update this time.� empress-eerian-sadow: Have you had a chance to try the
drink recipe?� Did you like it? �Nomme de Plume:
*nods* Al and Winry can�t have a perfect relationship forever.� Amethyst-eyed
Koneko:�
Yeah, Ed does have pretty bad luck with those phones.� *chuckles*� When I got this back from my beta, he
was sort of like, �having him sit down to pee is so unmanly...� (my beta is
male), but I figure, hey, he�s drunk and
I have seen a guy sit down to pee before so it�s not impossible haha.� I was teasing you with the Roy coming back comment ^_~� Lilith:
Shout louder, maybe he�ll hear you. hehe� ravensfrost: I�m really glad you�re enjoying the
story and glad you think Ed is maturing in this well.� chelzi:�
You left me so many wonderful reviews.�
Thank you so much.� I wish I could
answer them all individually, but then I think this section would be longer than
the story. ^_~� rinfang: *chuckles* I don�t it as criticism, though I think you might want
to take a look at some of my work that isn�t on aff.n
before you decide you don�t like my Roy/Ed at all.� I post very little of what I write here at aff.n.� If you head
over to ff.n (there�s a link in my profile here to my
ff.n profile), I think you�ll find some stories that
may be more your taste.� This story,
Descent, is not a romance in any way.� If
you�re looking for romance, I would suggest checking out �The Gift� on ff.n.� It�s a light fic that has a sweet ending.� It�s also a holiday fic,
so this is the perfect time of year for you to check it out.

-�

Descent

Chapter Forty-One

Honesty and Deceit

-

Winry
stepped outside and softly closed the door behind her.� It was very early, but she couldn�t sleep and
she had no real desire to stay in bed.�
Her gaze moved over the fields of grass, the trees, the dirt road... The
sun had yet to peak out over the mountains, but the sky and her surroundings
were softly lit by its eminent arrival.

She
breathed the morning air in deeply, then let it out as
she moved to stand near the railing that surrounded the porch.� The air was lukewarm, but the day would heat
quickly after the sun rose.� Summer in
Rizembool was a beautiful thing and she loved it despite how hot it got in the
middle of the day.

Memories
wafted through her mind of when she was younger, of when she played in the
fields and in the trees, or down by the stream...� Memories of a time when her days were filled
of playing with her friends, then coming home and chatting to her mother as she
made dinner, or sitting on her father�s lap while he read.

Tears
pricked at her eyes at the thought of her parents.� She missed them so much...� They�d gone away to help in the war and never
returned...� War had been such a far away
thing to her before.� It had been a thing
that happened in another place to other people.�
War had possessed no name, no face...�
But after she�d learned of their deaths it had felt as if war was right
outside her window, waiting to come in and get her like the imaginary monster
under her bed or in her closet.

It was
the same now.� War was rearing its ugly
head and it was just outside her
window, but it wasn�t coming for her...�
No, it never came for her...� She
gazed over the peaceful scenery with a sharp pain in her chest.� War was out there.� It was hiding in the trees and it was
stationed in Rizembool�s central township.� War was wearing the sharp blue uniforms of
the Amestris military, and it was wearing the plain clothes worn by those she�d
met from the People�s Army.� War was
knocking on her door and demanding yet another sacrifice, and she loathed to
give up anything else because it hurt too badly.� The loneliness was just too much...� ��

Winry
sniffled a little and looked down at the heavy wood of the balustrade.� She�d spent a long time crying in the shed
last night.� It wasn�t as if she�d wanted
to get into a fight with Al.� Yes, it was
true that she hadn�t told him directly that she was leaving, but it was because
she�d known that he would want to go with her.�

She
gritted her teeth in anger.� Those men
from the military�Archer and Kimblee�they were out to
get Al.� Archer wanted Al to work for
him, and she wouldn�t put it past him to do something rotten to coerce him into
joining them.� And then there was Kimblee...

A small
growling noise sounded in her throat.�
The way Kimblee had looked at Al, the way he�d
talked to Al... it
reeked of wrongness, yet Al didn�t see it!�
And then there was Russell.� He
also wanted Al to join in this war, but for the People�s Army instead.� She shuddered at the thought of him.�

Russell
was...� She couldn�t explain it exactly,
but something wasn�t right about him...�
And, of course, Al didn�t see it.�
He was too na�ve, too trusting...�
It was one of those things she both loved and hated about him.� It was cute, but not when there was trouble.

She
sighed and glanced over toward the mountains.�
The sun would be up very soon now, yet it was hard to feel any joy over
seeing the sunrise.� The fight had taken
a lot out of her.� She didn�t want Al to
get hurt just because he was trying to protect her.� There was no need for him to go with her
everywhere she went.

And, as
much as she tried to forget, Russell�s words haunted her.� She tried to tell herself that Al did trust
her, that Russell was wrong.� He was just
trying to cause contention between them.�
She was sure that he was telling Al things to make him doubt her too...� It made sense in a sick way.� If they were fighting, then maybe Al would
decide to take off and join the People�s Army.�
Of course, Al didn�t think that way.�

They
needed to talk...� They needed to clear
the air between them, because she couldn�t stand the thought of fighting with
Al, and she couldn�t bear the thought of Al joining the war�no matter what
side.� She had so many fears and
doubts...�

Winry
moved her gaze to the road that led away from the house.� How many times had she stood here or at her
window, gazing at that road and waiting for Al and Ed to return?� How often had she wondered if they were
alright?� They were so close; they were
like her family...� How often had she
felt the fear that they would never return, just like her parents...?� She never wanted to have to deal with that
kind of fear and loneliness again...

She
lifted her head a fraction when she heard the door opening behind her, then
shutting softly.� Her body tensed and she
forced herself to stare fixedly at the road.�
Until either granny or Russell came back, she and Al were the only ones
there, so there was no mistaking who it was behind her.

There was
silence for a few moments, then she heard Al�s boots
clunk against the wooden deck as he walked over beside her.� Out of the corner of her eye, Winry could see
him lean against the railing.� He didn�t
say anything, and neither did she, but Winry could feel the tension between
them.� It was uncomfortable and she
suddenly felt the urge to run away and not have to deal with it.� Instead, she turned her head and looked at Al
as he stared off down the road.

Winry
took in every little feature as she studied him.� His sandy-blond hair had begun to grow out
just a little bit since she�d cut it, but it still looked neat and well taken
care of.� His lips were pulled down into
a thoughtful frown, and his eyes held dark bags under them as if he hadn�t
slept.�

Perhaps
he hadn�t...�

The two
of them rarely, if almost never, fought and in fact this was the first real
fight they�d had since... well... since they were children.� Alphonse was such a peace-loving person that
Winry doubted he�d gotten any more sleep than she had.�

Winry
felt her eyes sting as she imagined him not being here anymore.� It suddenly didn�t matter if she was right or
if he was right...� Who spoke up first or
apologized didn�t really matter.� What
mattered was that they loved each other and that they took care of each
other...

�Al...�
Winry began with the intention of apologizing, but Al turned and quickly
pressed a finger to her lips.

�Don�t
say it,� he whispered, and his eyes crinkled in pain.� She frowned at him, wondering what he thought
she had been going to say.� With a deep
sigh, Al dropped his hand and closed his eyes for a moment, before opening them
and saying, �I was wrong...�

She shook
her head and opened her mouth, but again he pressed a finger to her lips.� �Don�t speak, please...� he said.� �Not yet.�
Just...�
Let me speak first.�

Winry
nodded reluctantly and closed her mouth.�
Shaking his head, Al turned his back to the railing and leaned against
it.� �I thought a lot about what you said
last night, and... well, I... I can�t promise I won�t try to go with you all
the time.� I can�t promise not to worry
about you or to want to protect you.�

He turned
his head and stared at her in silence for a moment before going on.� �I can�t imagine my life without you...� he
said, his voice heavy with emotion.� �If
something happened to you...�� He shook
his head.� �I�d never forgive
myself.� I know you�re probably going to
be mad at me for saying this, but I�m not going to back down.� I�d do anything if I thought it would keep
you safe.�

She folded
her arms under her breasts and stared down at the porch before saying, �You�re
right.� I don�t like it, but...�� Her voice caught and she had to stop for a
moment to get her emotions in check.� �I
do understand.� I want to protect you
too.� I don�t want to lose anyone
else...�

Tears
gathered in her eyes, making the wood blur into a brown blob, and she closed
her eyes, making a tear from each eye slide down her cheek.� The sound of boots on wood met her ears, then a hand was touching her chin and tipping her head
up.�

Opening
her eyes, Winry saw that Al was looking down at her in concern, and she tried
to look down again as embarrassment filled her at being so weak.� Instead of forcing her to keep looking up at
him, he stepped closer and wrapped his arms around her.

�I don�t
want to fight, Winry...� he breathed into her ear.� �Why are we fighting?� Why is it always so tense?�

She
wrapped her arms around his chest and buried her head in his chest before
saying bitterly, �It�s because of the military, and
because of Russell...�� Truthfully, she
wanted to lay all the blame at Russell�s feet.�
She didn�t like him, and it was after he came that her and Al had become
so edgy with each other.� When Al didn�t
say anything, Winry pulled back a little and stared up into Al�s eyes.� �I don�t want him staying here anymore,
Al...�� Sure, he was gone now, but she
knew he�d be back...

Al looked
away and pulled an indecisive look.�
�Winry...� I don�t think Russell
is the problem...�

�Yes he
is,� she insisted, and tried to pull away, but he held onto her.� Feeling frustrated and hurt, Winry said, �I
don�t feel good having him here.� If you
won�t tell him to leave, then I will.��
If she had to, she�d talk to granny and have her tell him to leave.� It
was her house after all.

�Winry,
you don�t understand...� I know Russell
is sort of a jerk sometimes, but he does have a good heart.�

She made
a sound of frustration, and said, �You say that about everyone.� I love you, Al, I
really do, but you�re too nice.� You
don�t see that there could be a problem because you want to believe there is
good in everyone.�

�Not
everyone, but I do believe it of Russell.��
Al shook his head.� �He has been a little strange since he got
here, but I�m guessing it�s the stress he�s under with his assignment from his
superiors and having to leave Fletcher in Dublith.�

�I feel
for him, I really do, but...�� She made a
sound of frustration.� �Do you care for
him more than me?�

�No!� Of course not!� Al
exclaimed, looking hurt that she�d even suggest such a
thing.

�Then please ask him to go...�

Al gave
her a wounded look, but finally nodded.�
�Okay...� When he gets back, I�ll
let him know that he�ll need to find another place...� But, give him a little time to make other
plans at least, okay?�

�He
didn�t give us any notice that he was
coming,� she complained.

�Compromise
with me,� Al said.� �He�s my friend, and
I don�t want to ask him to leave.�

She
sighed.� �Okay...�� She supposed she could compromise with him
about it.� At least Russell would be gone
soon, and that would mean less tension in the house, and less of a chance that
he�d be able to talk Al into joining the People�s Army.�

;-;-;-;-;-;-;

It took
Ed five tries, in the space of three hours, to get out of bed.� He�d sit up, groan at whatever symptom was
bothering him most at the moment�be it headache, stomachache, or just plain
tiredness�and lay back down to get more rest.�
In fact, it wasn�t until the phone rang that Ed realized just how late
he�d slept in.� Not that it really
mattered.� Weekends were meant for
sleeping in.

Rolling
over, Ed pawed blindly for the phone�more because the noise was giving him a
headache than the fact that he wanted to answer it�and when he found the receiver,
Ed brought it to his ear and mumbled, �Whthefukdouwant...�

There was
a moment of silence before, �Mornin�, chief!� was
bellowed into the phone.� �Or would you
rather me call you �boss� now?�

�I�d
rather you not be calling at all.� It�s
Sunday; what the hell do you want?� Ed snapped, and instantly regretted it as
his head began to pound even worse than it had been.

Havoc
chuckled.� �I see you�re in your normal,
pleasant mood.� Well, I�ll get right to
the point then.� I just visited Fuery at
the hospital�you know they�re releasing him soon, right?� Anyway, he seemed pretty nervous and all, and I thought that, if you weren�t busy today, it would
be nice if you dropped by and said �hi�.�

Ed
glanced over to the clock.� It was almost
noon...� Rubbing his eyes, Ed said,
�Yeah, sure.� I was planning on going
down there anyway today.�

�Thanks,
chief.�� There was a small pause, then a
more serious, �He told me how often you�ve been visiting him.� That�s... that�s really good of you...�

�Yeah,
I�m full of goodwill,� Ed said sardonically as he yawned.� He wanted to say something snide, but they�d
just made peace and he didn�t want to chance shaking things up right now.� �Anything else?�

�Nope!�
the man said, his voice returning to his previous good humor.� Ed frowned in irritation.� Why did Havoc get to sound like he was in
such a good mood when Ed felt so shitty?

�Fine,
bye,� Ed grunted, and hung the phone up so roughly that it made a loud �ding�
sound as the bell inside jingled.� Ed lay
there for several minutes, tempted to go back to sleep.� Instead, he smacked his lips together and
decided that he needed something to get the moisture back in his mouth.� Some water or something...�

After
forcing himself out of bed, Ed looked down at himself as he headed toward the kitchen.� Naked.� Completely naked.� And of course his clothes were strewn all
over the apartment...� He pulled a glass
out of the cupboard, filled it with water, and sipped at it on his way to the
bathroom.� What the hell had he been
thinking last night?� Obviously, he hadn�t been thinking...�

Never getting drunk again... Ed thought to himself as he moved
to stand in front of the bathroom mirror.�
He moved his head close to the glass and peered closely at himself.� His eyes were bloodshot, and his hair was
messy and knotted.� He groaned as he
reached up and fingered his hair.� It was
going to be a bitch to untangle...

He leaned
in even closer and turned his head slightly before saying to his reflection,
�You look like shit.�� He sniffled a
little, then rubbed at his nose before running a hand
over his cheeks.� He had a bit of
stubble, but it was so fine and light that it was barely noticeable.� �No wonder everyone thinks you look like a
kid,� Ed complained to his reflection as he set the glass of water down and
leaned in a tad closer to inspect his face.

Maybe he
should shave...� It was something he only
had to do a couple times a week, but he needed it now...� Ed blanched at the thought.� Once or twice a week was actually an
exaggeration.� It was more like once or
twice a month...�

�You
suck, you know that right?� Ed said to his reflection, who didn�t seem at all
disturbed by this insult.� �You can�t
even grow facial hair!�� Ed looked down
at Roy�s razor
and can of shaving cream.� He could see Roy in his mind, face
lathered with cream and slowly dragging the expensive razor down his face.

�Only pansies use shaving cream
and razors,� Ed
remembered saying.� He smiled a little as
he remembered turning one of his fingers into a blade, rubbing soap on his face
after wetting it a little, and quickly giving himself a shave.

�You�d use a razor and shaving
cream too if you actually grew facial hair instead of that fuzz you like to
pretend is hair,� Roy had countered with that damned
smirk of his...

Ed
blinked rapidly at the sudden sting in his eyes, then grabbed the can of
shaving cream, dispensed some into his palm, then lathered his face with
it.� It felt strange having foam on his
face, but when Ed looked back up to the mirror, all he could think of was how Roy looked like this in
the mornings.

Snatching
the razor, Ed pointed it at his reflection and said, �Pathetic.� That�s you.�
Weeping and moaning over that bastard...�
He�s fine.� He�s going to show up any day now and he�ll
probably laugh at how stupid you were to believe that he could be hurt.�

Ed
dragged the razor down his face, turned on the tap, and rinsed the blade before
repeating the motion.� After a couple of
times, Ed pointed the razor at his reflection again and said, �Roy Mustang doesn�t make mistakes.� You�ll see.�

His
reflection looked unconvinced.

Swallowing
hard, Ed continued to shave; and when he was done, he rinsed his face, patted
it dry, then reached for the bottle of aftershave
lotion Roy
always used.� If he was going to use Roy�s stuff, he might as
well go all the way.�

Patting
the lotion on his skin, Ed suddenly breathed in quickly through his nose and he
blinked his eyes again�this time at a different sting.� �Holy fuck!� Ed
swore as his face tingled and burned.� He
turned to the bottle to check the ingredients before putting it back on the
counter.� Fucking Mustang could have told
him...

He looked
back up at the mirror and touched his skin.�
It felt so smooth...� He leaned
close to the mirror to inspect himself.� Much smoother than shaving with a knife and a bit of soap and
water...

�No
wonder he always feels so good...� Ed murmured, then closed his eyes and tried
to concentrate on how smooth his skin felt under his fingers, and the smell of
the aftershave.� He could almost pretend
he was touching Roy�s
face...

Almost.

But not quite.

Ed opened
his eyes and stared at himself for a moment before dropping his hand.� �Like I said...� he whispered, and saw in the
mirror, the moisture gathering in his eyes as he felt the sting.� �Pathetic.�
He�s fine...� I don�t miss him at
all...��

A tear
escaped and trickled down his cheek.� He
sniffled, and murmured, �And you�re a fucking bad liar...� before turning away from the mirror and hurrying back
to the bedroom.

;-;-;-;-;-;-;-;

�Al!�� Al snorted as he was jolted awake from his
nap.� �Al!� came the shout again, this
time accompanied by a banging on his door.�
�I�m coming in.�� He heard the
door open, then a small, �Oh...�

�I�m
awake...� he said groggily.� Now...� Reaching up, Al pulled his face off the open
book he�d been sleeping on and sat up to see Winry standing in the doorway of
his bedroom.� He smiled tiredly at her to
show that he wasn�t bothered at all, and said, �What�s going on?�

She
looked a little sheepish, and said, �I�m really sorry I woke you.� I didn�t realize...�� She trailed off as he waved a hand to show
that it was of no consequence.� He needed
to get up anyway or he wouldn�t be able to get to sleep that night.

�Well...�� She stepped fully into the room, and he could
see that she was holding a piece of paper.�
�I was just going over the list of people we were inviting to the
wedding...�

Uh oh... he thought, knowing full well
what was coming.� �And?� he asked,
showing no sign that he knew what she was about to bring up.

�And,
well...�� Winry looked down at the list,
then up to him.� �You haven�t been able
to contact Ed yet, have you?�

I knew it... Al thought wearily.� �Aaaah... no,� he
admitted.� �But,� he continued, trying to
make himself look better.� �From what I
gathered talking to Teacher, he�s in Central, so he shouldn�t be too hard to
find.�

Winry
stared at him silently for a moment, then walked over to the bed, and sat down
beside him.� She took in a deep breath
and let it out slowly.� �Al...� she began
softly.� �I really don�t understand why
you haven�t tried to find him yet.� It�s
been months.�� She turned her head to
look at him and repeated with a little force, �Months!�

He
couldn�t meet her eyes.� She was right,
but...� �Why do you want him at the
wedding so much?� he asked and glanced at her long enough to see a shocked and
incredulous look on her face before looking away.

�Are you
serious?!� Winry said in disbelief.� �I
can�t believe you�re asking me that!� Ed
is my friend, and he�s your
brother.� Those reasons alone are enough
to want him there.� Besides, if it gets
you two back together then that�s even more important!� I don�t like to see how distant you are when
it comes to him.� I want to see you guys
laughing and joking and...� her voice faltered, and he turned his head back to
look at her.

�Winry...�
Al said and rested his hand on her leg.

She
turned her head to look up into his eyes and said, �Why don�t you want him
there?�� He opened his mouth and closed
it again before shrugging a little.� �Oh,
no...� Winry pressed.� �You tell me,
Alphonse.� I don�t want to be put off
anymore.� You keep giving me excuse after
excuse, but they�re not the real reasons, are they?�� Her eyes held hurt in them and she pleaded,
�Please... tell me the real reason.�

Al opened
his mouth again, closed it, swallowed, then looked
away.� He couldn�t do it.� He couldn�t tell her that he was afraid that
she still loved Ed, couldn�t tell her that he was afraid that she�d change her
mind at the last second and want to be with him instead.

He looked
down in his lap and murmured, �I guess I�m just afraid that we�ll get into
another fight.�� It was half truth, but
not the �real reason�.� �What if we get
into a fight and ruin the day for you?� he said, hoping she�d take that excuse
and not dig deeper.

�Oh...
Al...� Winry murmured and laid her hand on his.�
�That�s really thoughtful, but I�m sure it will be fine.� I think Ed has had plenty of time to cool
down.� I bet...�� She trailed off and there was silence for a
moment before she continued.� �I bet he�s
as nervous as you are.� I bet he thinks
you hate him and don�t want to see him,� she said, her voice seeming more
confident.� �I think you should find him
and make peace with him.�

He looked
down at his hands.� Maybe she was
right...� Maybe.� He glanced up at her and felt guilt rise up
within him at not telling her the whole truth.�
What would she say if he told her his fears?� Would she think he didn�t trust her?� Would she be mad at him?

Al looked
back down at his hands and gripped the hem of his shirt.� If she really knew him, would she still want
to marry him?� Maybe she was just in love
with who she thought he was...� Or maybe...� He
gripped the shirt tighter.� Maybe, she
was simply setting for him because she didn�t think she could have Ed...

The
thought caused a sharp pain in his chest and he felt bile rise up in his
throat.� �Winry?� he choked out.� He wanted to look up at her, but he
couldn�t...� �Do you...� Do you love me?� he asked.� �I mean, really?� Are you sure you want to marry me?�

When
there was no immediate answer, he looked up to see a horrified look on her
face.� �Of course!� she breathed.� �I...�
How can you even doubt it�doubt me?�

Relief
and a new wave of guilt washed through him and he said, �I don�t doubt
you...� I guess I just wanted to be sure...�� It sounded lame, even to himself,
and he felt the need to mutter an apology before saying, �I�ll find him...
but... I�m worried about leaving you here by yourself...�

�Don�t
be,� she said.� �I�ll probably be safer
while you�re gone since it�s you that
Archer and Kimblee want, not me.� You just be careful
in Central, okay?�

He
nodded.� �I will.�� A thought occurred to him.� �I�ll take Russell with me.�� It would make a great excuse to get his
friend out of Rizembool without having to directly tell him he wasn�t wanted
there anymore.

Unfortunately,
this did not produce the response that he�d been expecting.� Winry didn�t look too pleased.� �I don�t think you should travel with him,�
she said flatly.

�I
thought you wanted him out of the house,� he countered, feeling a little
exasperated.�

�I do,
but I don�t want him going with you.��
Her tone was stubborn and he grumbled to himself before answering her.

�You
can�t have things both ways.� This will
get him away from here; and I am not
worried about him.�

She stood
up and frowned at him stubbornly before grudgingly saying, �Fine...� I still don�t like it, but if it will get you
to go find Ed and if he�s not here...��
She paused for a moment, then said, �When will
you leave?� How long do you think it will
take?�

Good
questions...� Al laid
back on the bed and stared at the ceiling.�
�Well, I guess that depends on when Russell gets back.� I doubt he�s going to be gone too long.� Hmmm...� Maybe we�ll leave in a couple of weeks, no
later than that, and I�ll bet if I go directly to Central Headquarters, I�ll be
able to find out where Ed is as long as he hasn�t left the military yet...�

He
glanced at her and saw a worried look on her face.� �I doubt we�ll be gone longer than a week or
two.� �When her demeanor didn�t change,
Al asked, �Do you want to come?��

She
seemed to consider this, then shook her head.� �Probably better if you go alone.� You know, so that you and Ed can have some
time by yourselves...� Which means, you
should dump Russell along the way,� she added tersely.

Al
laughed.� �Admit it,
you just don�t want to travel with him.�

Winry
gave him a small smile and started toward the door.� When she reached it, she looked back at him
and said, �Maaaaaybe,� before slipping out of the
room.

He
chuckled a little more, then closed his eyes.� He still felt a little worried and a tad
jealous of Ed, but he couldn�t avoid this forever.� Winry was right.� He and Ed needed to make peace.� This had gone on for far too long, and
truthfully... Al missed him. �With a
sigh, Al opened his eyes and stared up at the ceiling.� It was Ed�s birthday tomorrow...� He�d be eighteen...� If he was in Central, Gracia
Hughes probably knew how to contact him.�
If he knew her�and he did�she�d probably be sure to make Ed a cake or
something.� That�s just the way she was.

Maybe he
should call her.� He�d stopped calling
around after he�d talked with Colonel Mustang.�
He�d felt so hurt that he�d been lied to because he couldn�t help but
wonder if Ed was behind the lie.� Al
supposed he shouldn�t be so shocked that the colonel would lie to him because,
well... this was Colonel Mustang, and as much as he respected the man, he
hadn�t always been completely truthful to him and Ed over the years.� He was shady sometimes; but still, Al didn�t
like the lie.�

He�d felt
that if Ed had asked the colonel to lie for him, then he�d probably asked
others too.� And if he went that far,
then he must not have wanted to be found.�
Al didn�t know if Gracia would lie to him on
Ed�s request or not, but he supposed that it wouldn�t hurt to give it a
try.� And besides, it had been a few
months.� Winry was probably right.� Things had calmed down and Ed probably was
just too proud to admit he was wrong.�

Al yawned
and closed his eyes.� He was still groggy
from his nap, and tired from a night of no sleep.� Maybe he�d call sometime tonight, or even
tomorrow morning.� Maybe
tomorrow.� Then he could wish
Elysia a happy birthday too.

;-;-;-;-;-;-;

Ed sat
the chess set on the concrete step as he sat down on the stairs at the back of
the hospital.� His visit with Kain Fuery
had gone rather well.� Like always,
they�d played chess and talked.� It
seemed like Fuery got better with the game each time he went to visit, and Ed wondered if it was some memory coming
back.�

He
shrugged and fished in his pocket for his pack of smokes.� Fuery was very nervous though, Havoc had been
right.� The poor man was terrified of
going back out into a world he didn�t remember.�
He was scared to go back to work because he couldn�t remember all that
he was supposed to do.� Ed had promised
that he�d help, and he was sure everyone else would too.� No one wanted Fuery to be out of a job�he was
one of them�and they were going to take care of him.� That had seemed to make Fuery feel a little
better, but Ed wasn�t sure how much it had really helped.�

Pulling
the pack from his pocket, Ed looked at it in disbelief for a moment before he
threw it on the ground and cursed.� Empty
again...� How the fucking hell had that
happened?� He tried to think back on how
many he�d smoked today, but he couldn�t remember.

�Fuck...�
he growled in frustration and rested his head in his hands.� He needed a fucking smoke and he was
out.� Seriously, he needed to keep track
of these things and get more before
he ran out...

The sound
of footsteps on the concrete caught his attention as they moved closer to him,
and when they stopped, Ed glanced up to see a cigarette held in front of his
face.� Looking past it, Ed saw the face
of the doctor who had treated his eye the day Havoc had punched him.

�You
going to take it or what?� the ragged-looking doctor asked.�

Ed
reached up, relieved him of the cigarette, and murmured, �Thanks...� before
lighting up and inhaling.� His eyes
widened and he started hacking.� �What
the fucking hell is this?!� Ed
exclaimed through coughs.� This was worse
than the first time he�d had one of Havoc�s cigarettes.

�It�s a real cigarette,� the doctor said, and Ed
stared hard at it before realizing there was no filter on the damn thing.� He shuddered a little and took another drag,
bracing himself for the raw assault on his throat and lungs.�

The
doctor�Knox, Ed recalled�took a seat beside him on the step and lit up one for
himself.� After a couple moments of
silence, besides Ed�s coughing, Knox said, �You been taking care of that eye?�

�Yeah,�
Ed choked out.� He was definitely getting
the fix he needed, but Ed didn�t think it was worth the price he was paying.

Knox eyed
him up and down.� �You didn�t go get
yourself hurt again, did you?�� Instead
of answering verbally, Ed shook his head.�
�Good.� Why are you at the
hospital if you�re not hurt?�� The man�s
voice was gruff, but Ed could also detect some note of parental concern there
as well.� At least, it was the same tone
his mother would get sometimes.� He�d
also gotten the same tone from Hughes here and there when he was younger...

�Visiting
a friend,� he said, then took another drag before
coughing again.� Knox nodded, and took a
drag off his own cigarette as if it were no big deal.� �What about you?� Ed asked.

�I work
here; in the morgue.�

Ed nodded
as he remembered something about that from before.� Finishing the cigarette, Ed flicked it away
and stared dully down at the ground for a moment, then sat up straight when a
thought occurred to him.

�You work
in the morgue?� Ed asked, suddenly much more interested.

�That�s
what I said, wasn�t it?� Knox grunted.

�Are
there any other morgues in Central?�

�No.� There used to be, but when Fuhrer Bradley
came to power, he wanted all the dead in one place.� Stupid thing, if you ask me,� Knox said as he
flicked his own cigarette away.

Ed�s
heart pounded in his chest and he felt nervous excitement bubble up inside of
him.� �Do you know about the shooting
that happened at headquarters?� Ed asked, knowing full well that anyone who didn�t
know had probably been outside the city or living under a rock.

�Of
course,� Knox said, taking on a guarded look.�
Ed opened his mouth, but no words came out.� He wasn�t sure how to ask what he wanted to
ask.� Should he say it right out, or
should he try to beat around the bush?�
He wasn�t very good at the latter, and the former might cause him more
problems than anything else...� The
decision was taken from him when Knox said dryly, �You want to know if Colonel
Mustang is down in my office?�

�Uuuuhh...� was all Ed could manage, amazed that the doctor
had practically read his mind.

�You�re
not the only one who�s asked me that question.�
The press, nosey military people... I�ve gotten all kinds, and I�ll tell
you what I told them; it�s classified.�

Ed deflated
at that and murmured, �Oh...�� Of course... �It would
make sense that he couldn�t tell...

Knox eyed
him again, then said, �Most people�s motives are easy to figure out, but I have
no idea why you want to know.�� He looked at Ed expectantly.

Ed cast his
mind about trying to come up with a good reason.� Telling the man they were lovers would
probably�most definitely�be a bad idea, and the fact that Roy was his commanding officer didn�t really
seem that important of a reason.� Finally
Ed settled on, �We�re roommates...�

When Knox
didn�t say anything, Ed said quickly, �And friends.� He�s my friend, and I was out of town when it
happened, and I�m just worried...�� He
choked on the last word and turned his head away.� Would a roommate or a friend get teary about
this sort of thing?� Was he being too
suspicious?

�Sorry...�
Ed murmured, pulling himself together.�
�It�s just that no one can tell me anything, and I�m worried...�

Knox
seemed to mull over this before saying, �He�s your commanding officer too, isn�t
he?�

�Ah,
yeah,� Ed said, surprised that he knew.

Knox
nodded and gave him a considering look.�
�I�ve known Roy Mustang for quite a long time; knew him in Ishbal too.� Good
man, odd tastes...�� Knox looked at Ed
through narrowed eyes for a moment before saying, �How long have you two been
living together?�

�A few
months...� Ed said quietly.� What did
�odd tastes� mean?� Did Knox know
something was going on between him and Roy?�
Would he tell others?� He suddenly
felt a little panicked and tried to figure out how he could fix the situation.

�A record
for him...� Well, whatever, not my
business.�� Knox looked around, then said, in a low voice, �I haven�t seen him, and if you
ask me, he�s not dead.� There�s always
the possibility they dumped his body somewhere, but I doubt it.� Mustang is too well known, and it�s common
knowledge that the medics rushed off with him after the shooting, so if he�s
dead, they�ll have to have a body to produce.�
I also doubt they�re going to be able to keep this from the public much
longer.� Either he�s dead or he�s not,
and the longer they wait, the more suspicious it becomes.�

Ed stared
at him in silence.� He didn�t dare to
believe that Knox could be right.� �So,
you think he�s alive?�� He wanted to hear
it again.� He needed to hear it again.

Knox
nodded.� �If he was dead, I think we�d
already know it.� The window of
opportunity has passed for his enemies.�
I think we�ll find out soon, so don�t let it worry you anymore.�� Knox scowled, and said irritably, �And don�t
you tell anyone what I told you.�

�I
won�t,� Ed said, a smile growing on his face.�
He felt relief wash over him.� Up
until this moment, he�d had nothing solid to hold on to.� Now, he really could hope that Roy was alive.� He wouldn�t hope too much because it would be
all that much worse if it didn�t end up being true, but it was something.

Knox
stood and said, �Well, I�ve got to get back to work.�� He stared silently at Ed for a moment, then
said, �Take care of yourself, alright?�

Ed
nodded.� �I will, and... thanks...� �The last was added in a soft tone.� Knox waved it off, gave him one last studied
stare, and began walking away.�

After he
was about two paces away, Knox called back, �And quit smoking.� It�s bad for your health.�

At that,
Ed laughed out loud.� He supposed if
anyone else had told him that, he would have gotten irritated, but from a man
who smoked cigarettes that Ed would only touch when he was desperate...�

�I�ll
think about it,� Ed said in good humor.�
He�d actually already thought about it.�
He�d planned to quit when he came back to Central, but it just hadn�t
been the right time; too much going on.

Ed
watched Doctor Knox go, then stood up, picked up the chess set, and headed
toward home.� His mind was filled with
hopes and dreams that he almost felt were possible now.� Roy
wasn�t in the morgue, and Doctor Knox thought that he was alive.� It was the best news he�d heard in a while
and he let himself hope, just a little, that it was true.

He turned
the corner that would take him straight to the apartment and saw Havoc walking
down the sidewalk toward him.� The man
was barely lighting up a cigarette and when he looked up, he saw Ed and waved.

Ed half waved, half made a �give me� gesture.�
�Loan me one,� he said when he was close enough.� Shrugging, Havoc stopped, pulled one out, and
handed it to Ed who promptly lit up.�
After taking a drag, Ed said, �What are you doing around here?��

�Heading
toward a friend�s place,� he said nonchalantly, then waved and started walking
again.

Ed turned
a little to glance at him as he passed, then shrugged and walked the last
little stretch toward the apartment.�
Finishing the cigarette, Ed decided that he�d drop off the game, then head to the store to pick up another pack and maybe
some food.

He
unlocked the door and let himself in, then headed back to the bedroom to drop
the game onto the bed.� He turned to go,
then stopped and frowned at Roy�s
desk.� One of the drawers was slightly
open.�

Odd...

Ed never
got into Roy�s
desk, and he was pretty sure that all the drawers had been completely closed
before...

He walked
over and slid the drawer open.� It was
filled with a mess of papers.� He tapped
his fingers on the wood, then shrugged and shut the drawer.� Maybe he somehow nudged it when he�d been
drunk last night, or maybe he�d even opened it and now didn�t remember.� Shaking his head at himself, Ed headed out of
the apartment with a new determination not to drink that much again.

;-;-;-;-;-;-;

Kain
stared up through the darkness at the ceiling above.� He knew that he should go to sleep, but he
couldn�t.� He was tired, but also too
worried to sleep.� The day had brought so
many visitors, mostly people that were his coworkers from before...� He�d met them all before, sure, but most of
them didn�t visit on a regular basis.� It
had only been Roy who had done so; and then, of course, Ed when he came back to
Central.

He smiled
a little.� He liked Ed a lot.� He was fun to be with and very
reassuring.� He was just as good of a
person as Roy
had said he was.� His smile faded and he
thought of Roy�the
man who everyone but Ed called �the colonel�.�
What had happened to him?� Was he
alright?� As he pondered this, the door
opened and for a moment his room was bathed in light from the hallway, then the
door closed and he heard the click of a lock.�

Kain sat
up, expecting to see a nurse, or even�hopefully�Ed or Roy, but it wasn�t any of
those.� It was a woman he�d never seen
before, or at least that he didn�t remember having seen before, which didn�t
mean too much.� She was a pretty woman,
with long, straight, chestnut-colored hair.�
She was wearing a business suit that was grayish-purple with a green
shirt visible near her neck.�

�My name
is Colonel Juliet Douglas,� she said coolly.�
�I�m the fuhrer�s secretary.� You may address me as Ms. Douglas.�� Kain only had a moment to take this in before
she continued.� �Colonel Mustang put in a
request to have you reinstated in your previous position despite the fact that
your medical condition warrants your termination from the military.�

Kain
swallowed hard as fear gripped his insides and squeezed tightly.� This was it.�
They were going to kick him out and he�d have no job, and of course
they�d kick him out of the dorms because he couldn�t be in the military and
live there, and he�d have no way to pay for another place to live because he
didn�t have any skills, or at least any that he could remember...� His fearful thoughts ran together in a
torrent of frightened emotions.

�However,�
Ms. Douglas said, breaking into h is terrified thoughts.� �We have decided to grant Colonel Mustang�s
request.��

Kain�s
heart leapt within him.� They were going
to approve the request?� �But... why?� he asked, unable to keep the
question inside.

�Because,�
the woman said with a smile that Kain wasn�t sure he trusted.� �Before you lost your memory, you were a spy
for the fuhrer.� You kept an eye on
Colonel Mustang and those close to him, and reported to me and the fuhrer.� We�re keeping you on because Colonel Mustang
and his staff trusts you, and we want you to continue
the work you�ve been doing.�

His mouth
dropped in shock.� Spy...� On Roy...
and Ed... and all the others?� He felt numb inside as he tried to comprehend
it all.� He would never do such a thing... would he?�
Kain wanted to beg her to tell him it wasn�t true.� He couldn�t bear the thought that he�d spied
on them.� He liked them...� They�d been so
good to him and they�d visited him and... and...

�When
you�re released from the hospital, I expect you to make an appointment with the
fuhrer.� You�ll need to be reeducated
about the atrocities committed by the colonel and those who follow him.�

Kain
opened his mouth to say something, but he wasn�t exactly sure what he would
say.� Slowly, he closed his mouth and
nodded in numb silence.� He didn�t want
to believe it, but... this was the fuhrer�s
secretary, and she wouldn�t have any reason to lie to him, would she?� When she saw that he understood what was
expected of him, the woman nodded curtly and left the room, leaving Kain even
more miserable than he�d been before she�d come.

--

A/N: I feel bad that I�ve kept you all
waiting for so long.� I�d hoped to start
posting regularly on this, but school has taken most of my time (not only for
this semester but for most of the year�), and I realized that if I tried to
rush this story when I didn�t really have the time to work on it, I�d probably
be sacrificing quality and would probably make mistakes on the plot.

Thank you
all for being patient, and hopefully I will be able to get this updated more
regularly now that I�m less busy.

--

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