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Unforgivable	By : thePrincesJewel Category: Dragon Ball Z > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 7485 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own DragonballZ, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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�Self-mutilation, begging to be dominated, needing someone else to need us for something� even if all we were needed for was sex.�

�I do love you, Trunks. I�ve loved you ever since we were kids. We�ve been together 27 years, more or less�.

�I let myself be used. And every time you came to me, with someone else�s scent on you, I died a little more. You�ve seen my scars, Trunks. I put them there when I was sixteen. And every so often, I�d reopen them. I had to feel a different kind of pain to be sure I really was alive. I�d watch the blood run, bright red, proof I really did exist and I wasn�t just dreaming, having a nightmare. Proof that� that I was as worthless as I believed.�

His mind repeated the words he�d said, over and over. Goten sat uncomfortably, watching his lover sleep. I need to be needed. You need me, don�t you, Trunks? You need to beat me. He turned his attention to the blood dripping from his fingertips. The small scars were open again, but they weren�t so little this time, or as shallow as usual. Bright red dripped onto the black silk of the sheet, blending into the wet spot.

I know that�s what you need me for. You can get sex anywhere. You do� you have. You don�t need me for that. You don�t need me to stroke your ego, everyone else does that. You�ve proven more than once that loyalty means nothing to you� so you don�t need mine. You don�t even need my love. But� those are all I have to give you. My body, my heart, my soul. Me. I�m all I have to give� and you don�t need me. I need to be loved, too. But� you, you don�t love me. You use me.

You hate my father. I know you said you were sorry. But you hate him. I meant it when I said I�d rather be dead than have to choose between you. I can�t take any more hurt. I can�t take any more lies. I said� we had a new life, together. I was wrong. I knew it when I said it, had it confirmed when their energy spiked and you angry and said you weren�t� just wanting me�

Isn�t this proof? You got what you wanted. You got to pull me into your lap, tell me everything would be alright, that you loved me. You got to fuck me until I couldn�t scream anymore. I got a moment of peace, of hope, before the lies started. I got to be used, again. Hurt, again. No more, Trunks. See this blood? It tells me I�m real. That I didn�t just dream what just happened, that it wasn�t a nightmare I can wake up from. It proves that you don�t care enough about me to hold me after you�ve fucked me raw. All I�m good for is a lay, Trunks, a Saiyan lay� where you don�t have to hold back at all. That�s all you need me for. I�m your Saiyan fuck toy. I hate it.

See the bruises? You gave them to me. Not in our spars, not in training. You beat me when you fuck me, because I can take it the way your human lovers can�t. I�ve got broken ribs from where you squeezed to keep me still while you fucked me. Haven�t you ever thought that maybe I screamed too much? That it was more pain than pleasure? How many times have I had broken bones when you finished with me? Fractured ones that stayed together but still hurt like hell? How many times have I fallen back onto the bed and had to force my shoulder or my hip back into place because you dislocated them?

How can you just fall asleep when you leave me in so much pain? Don�t you care about me at all? Have you ever? Have you ever realized that you hurt me when you fuck me, not when we train?

Look at the blood, Trunks! It tells me that soon, it will all be over. No one will hurt me again, no one will be able to abandon me, ever. Everything�s not alright, Trunks. It hasn�t been for a long time.

I wish you loved me like I love you. I don�t want to hurt you. But just this once, I have no choice. This is the only way I can make you see what you�ve done to me� I just wanted to be needed� to be loved�

Goten sighed, settling carefully against the pillows, one arm pressing against his broken ribs. He hadn�t bothered putting his hip back into place this time. The pain was just another reminder of his worthlessness. The blades were tucked behind the mattress, fastened to the headboard. They�d been there for twenty years, Trunks had never even noticed. Just as he never noticed when Goten had used them, until recently. �You�ll notice this time, Trunks. I�m not hiding this time. I just� don�t want to hurt anymore. Twenty-seven years is too long� and I�m too tired, too hurt��

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Trunks: NOOOOOO!

Jewel: Where did you come from?

Trunks: You can�t kill Goten!

Jewel: Why?

Trunks: He�s my best friend in the whole world! You can�t just kill him!

Jewel: Yes, I can.

Goku: You won�t will you? *patented Son puppy eyes*

Jewel: Who do you expect to save him? His so-called lover�s fast asleep, and his dad and his lover are probably still going at it like crazed monkeys *is interrupted*

Vegeta: I DO NOT FIND THAT AMUSING!

Jewel: *scowls, finishes* and he wants to die. Who do you expect to save him?

Trunks: His mom!

Goku: Me!

Vegeta: � You wouldn�t!

Jewel: *blinks in absolute astonishment, smirks* I didn�t know you cared!

Vegeta: I don�t. That�s my point.

Trunks: DAAAAD!

Goku: Vegeta� he�s my son!

Vegeta: I do not care.

Goku: *bursts into tears and runs away*

Trunks: *goes back to trying to talk Jewel into letting Goten live*

Vegeta: *looks after Kakarot, starts looking spooked again*
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Unforgivable